(log) Yuushi and Kenya [PART TWO]
Who: Oshitari Yuushi and Oshitari Kenya/Keina
What: One Oshitari finds themselves wet and the other was the one with a bucket of water in hand
When: Aug 20th
Where: Kenya’s apartment
Rating: Fluff
Warnings: Cuteness and feels all over the place
Adjusting his glasses again, he sighed to himself once more. It was a...contented sound this time. Content to watch her. She really was lovely and adorable and he couldn’t stop watching her. Of course it was the same as when she was a he. He always kept an eye on Kenya when he could. The other moved so damn fast that sometimes he had troubles. But when the other slowed down enough...or he sped up a little...those times were the best. When they were on the same page. “Kenya.” He called out to her. “You don’t have to hurry. It won’t start for a while.”
When Kenya turned, she noticed Yuushi had moved from the floor to the couch and came back over to grab his discarded plate. She dumped it in the sink and rinsed it off in an expert way that said she’d probably done that a lot. Maybe even spring cleaned despite it being anything but spring. But when she was done, the water off and hands dry she started back toward the sofa. She moved slyly, not bothering to cover the fact that she was doing so too. In fact, Kenya smiled like the devil himself until she made her move.
One moment she was standing, and the next she slid right onto the couch, on top of Yuushi. Fingers splayed against thighs, as if to check see why there were lumps and lips twisted into a feigned frown. “Jeez, this couch is lumpy. Maybe I should beat it up?”
Instead, of course, she turned a little and snuggled into him. “Oh, I just had to find the comfy spot. Hehe!”
That smile. She was an Oshitari after all. He liked that look on her. That devious look. It made him eager to see what she had thought up for him. He refused to think that it might be something unpleasant. They weren’t arguing or competing. They were just being together. His anticipation was rewarded with her butt on his lap. He smiled warmly as she moved around and complained. “I’m not the one who bought the couch. I’m sure it came with the place.” He teased as she tried to get comfortable.
She snuggled against him finally and his heart skipped a beat. He didn’t doubt for a second that she felt it do so. She felt so perfect against him. She fit like a missing bit of a puzzle. This was meant to be. Nothing felt this natural that wasn’t. It...just wasn’t fair. The world must have truly hated him when it gave him Kenya as a relative and not as a stanger for him to woo. But would that really stop him? Right now, he didn’t think it mattered any more. They already crossed that bridge and burned it.
Arms wrapped around her, in a gentle, loving fashion. Not enough to keep her there should she want to move, but enough to say that he was there and holding her. That he wanted...needed to be close to her. He lightly kissed the top of her bleached hair and smiled against it. “You have some rather nice blankets, Kenya.” An eye for an eye...A couch for a blanket.
With Yuushi’s arms around her, she felt so warm and comfortable. Kenya didn’t mind being his blanket, but she did know that the chances of pulling another stunt like that when she was a man again were probably slim. It was less acceptable because of gender, right? She closed her eyes and forced the thoughts from her mind, not really wanting to be confused or burden herself with such heavy thoughts when she just wanted to enjoy being Yuushi’s blanket.
“Yeah, just too bad it’s not big enough to cover all of you. At least the important parts are, right?” She tipped her head slightly to look at him and flashed him a bright, sunny smile. “Y’can see though, right?”
Man, with his hair down he looked like someone straight out of those books he read. It made her want to reach back and play with his hair, fingers running through it before she kissed him. Instantly, with that thought, her cheeks grew pink and she looked back at the tv screen. She was sure that he’d be able to see exactly what she wanted to do, if she kept staring. oiwlehsdh That wasn’t acceptable!
He smiled a little and nuzzled her a little more. “I can see just fine.” he could. He saw just what he wanted to see. Her. Yes the television and the movie was right there, should he want to watch it. But honestly, he just wanted to look at her. He wanted to have eyes only on her. But he couldn’t stare long because he was sure she would notice and be unnerved by such a thing. Though with that smile she flashed, it was hard not to just stare. Stare and lightly, carefully, slide a hand under the hem of her shirt to just rest against her flesh. Fingertip just lightly stroking because he needed the contact. It was just the way he was. It actually did have nothing to do with sex this time. Just closeness.
He noted her blush when she looked back at him. A kiss. How easy it would be to drag her into a kiss. A long slow skilled kiss that sent her heart a racing and made them both forget that they were supposed to be watching a movie. He couldn’t help but kiss her. His lips pressing against her hair once she had turned back around. “Kenya...” He started. “if you want to later on....I’ll sleep out here tonight...” He didn’t want to. He really didn’t want to. He wanted to share the bed with her, but for once, he wanted to be a gentleman. Unless she invited him in. Then he would join her quite happily.
The second that Kenya felt the hem of her shirt lift and a warm hand slid against her, she tried not to think of dirty things. She didn’t want to only be like that with Yuushi, but she also didn’t know what kind of intention he had. So, she let it go and concentrated on the movie, of the colors moving and the content, even though she wasn’t sure what was going on at the moment.
Fortunately or unfortunately, Yuushi’s voice broke that concentration with his question. Oh. Hm.. Kenya was a good host, she couldn’t have him sleeping on the couch. It wasn’t how she was raised, often giving her bed up when she had friends over back home. It made her laugh, albeit a little nervously. “Nah, you have the bed I’ll sleep here... u-unless you just want to share like when we were kids?”
He had to shift away for a moment so that his cousin didn’t feel the smile forming on his lips. “No gentleman would ever let a lady sleep on the couch. And right now, you are a lady.” And honestly, even if he was a boy, he’d have made the same decision. “I think we can share.” He would like that. Curled together with his cousin, arms wrapped about her, nuzzled against her neck, sleeping soundly until morning....or afternoon in his case. “I’ll behave.” Well, unless Kenya didn’t want him to. Yuushi would be more than happy to be a bit naughty.
For now though, he was proving rather well that he could behave. His hand hadn’t moved up nor down. Just rested where it had been placed, drawing those little formless doodles on her abs. And every once in a while, dropping an unconscious kiss to her hair. After which, he would chuckle at something humorous happening in the movie and trying not to tear up when something romantic happened. Though he had seen it before, his heartstrings were still tugged by the plight on the screen. But it gave him hope too. If those two star crossed lovers could make it work out, why couldn’t they. Why couldn’t two male cousins love each other?
She was no lady, Yuushi! Even if she was female at the moment, she acted a lot like a man. A well mannered man, of course, but that still counted. R-right? It frustrated her, a little as she pouted at the screen to try and ignore the whole ordeal. She’d get him back, no doubt about that. Kenya could prank him or something.
“Jeez, you don’t have to treat me like a girl just cause I am one right now.” Or she could speak up, of course, despite the fact it was something of a mumble rather than a gripe. Kenya sighed, though, and wiggled in irritation as she stare at the tv again. Trying to watch a romantic comedy was at least entertaining. It had funny bits that she could laugh at, and soon her annoyance ebbed away to enjoy the movie. In fact, she even relaxed again and scooted closer if at all possible. And when things got emotional, since she did know Yuushi so well, she reached down to thread her fingers with his on her stomach, giving his hand a nice squeeze to let him know that she was there. Yuushi got stupid with those sorts of things, and it was kind of amusing as much as it was sweet.
He chuckled a little. Of course he didn’t have to treat her like one. But he would. He would until she turned back. Because every woman deserved to feel special and loved. And after she turned back...he would still treat Kenya as he had. Because his cousin deserved that feeling, no matter what gender. “All right...all right.” He murmured. He was agreeing only because he knew that would placate her. He wouldn’t actually do it though.
He felt her movement and blinked when her fingers twined with his. He was grateful for that. He knew what was coming up. That part of the movie where the girl and the guy ended up fighting really badly and yelling at each other. Saying angry things about everything that was wrong with them and their relationship and how it...Just. Wouldn’t. Work. And then after it was all out...and the girl was crying...the man realizing he didn’t care and coming back to comfort her. Kissing her tears away and confessing that he did still love her. That he wanted to be with her despite all of that. And Yuushi watched it all. Ate it all up and sniffled a little. It was just...so...beautiful. And he was okay with softly crying right along with the couple because Kenya was right there, holding his hand.
His arms tightened a little around her, holding her closer when the lovers on the movie embraced again. When they kissed, he considered once more, kissing her, but instead just cuddled her. He didn’t want her to think he was only kissing her because of the movie.
Movies like the one they were watching were always a rollercoaster. She remembered once watching The Ugly Truth, where she was amused that it was basically about men versus women on sex and relationships, but toward the end she was actually hoping that they would stop being stupid and just kiss already. It was sort of like that now, as she watched. And stupid as it was, she had the same thought as her cousin but was less bashful about doing it.
Kenya’s hand pulled Yuushi’s up to her lips and gently kissed the top of it, fingers still linked with his as they were. A moment later she was pulling their hands toward her chest where she cuddled it like a pillow and smiled up at him. Even as a man, she probably would have at last pulled the idiot into a hug while he cried at the stupid mush on the tv. In all honesty, the way Yuushi always reacted to such things really made her wonder why she’d become the woman and not the other way around. Then again, things probably would have ended up different. Yuushi probably wouldn’t even bother with Kenya if the tables were turned. Or maybe she just had a low opinion of herself?
She truly was a treasure. He was certain of that now. The way she cared for him. The way she kissed his fingers and cuddled him when he was feeling low because of the heart wrenching images was truly astounding. He forgot all about not wanting her to think it was the movie doing it. It was her doing it. His free hand moved to lightly cup her chin. He could tell her later, how the movie ended. But he wanted this right now. And if she smacked him...she smacked him. But he just couldn’t stop himself at the moment.
Shifting a little, he lightly pressed his lips to hers. Another chaste kiss, in thanks for being there for him when he needed it. But with a small promise that it could become a lot more than that. That he wanted it to grow a bit more passionate.
For whatever reason, Kenya was kind of stunned that Yuushi pulled her into a sweet kiss. She wasn’t expecting it, and instead thought he wanted to see the end of the movie because that was always the best part of romantic comedies. The guy gets the girl or vice versa and all is well in the world. But he was missing it just to kiss her. It tugged at Kenya’s own heart a bit, but she allowed it, even if she pulled back a bit a moment later.
“Yuu, you’re gonna miss the end.” Soft brown eyes looked up into dark blue, wondering what he’d do. Should she really be leading him on the way she was? Kenya wasn’t being much different than any other women, but... she wanted that closeness too, and just didn’t want to admit it aloud. Kenya was a nice person but somehow people just didn’t seem to be interested in anything long term. Yet Yuushi had known her, her whole life. It was just easier when she gave in to him because she did care for him. It was just wrong, the kind of way it was.
Despite her words, Kenya found herself reaching up to thread her fingers in loose strands of Yuushi’s hair. She didn’t do more than that, aside from smile. Didn’t want to encroach on the ending for him, but couldn’t help herself.
“I think...” He stated, lightly brushing their lips together as he spoke, “That I have my happy ending right here.” He stole another kiss. He didn’t mind being led on. He didn’t mind that she was the way she was. He adored Kenya. He truly did. He had from the first time they had been brought together at some family function. He adored Kenya enough that the man had grown to even like the other’s pet. He, who didn’t really enjoy creepy crawly things, even had a soft spot for the iguana that he knew was somewhere in the apartment.
His fingertips brushed her face fondly and once more, he kissed her. Three for three. Each time, the kiss grew a little longer. A little more intense. “Besides... I think I’ve seen this one. I can tell you how it ends. Or better yet...I can show you, hmmm?” He rubbed their noses together fondly.
With each kiss Kenya’s body shifted a bit more so the angle wouldn’t be as awkward. By the time Yuushi rubbed their noses together she was facing away from the television entirely, cheeks threatening to heat up again. “Y-you’re not going to mock marry me, are you?”
Was she nervous? Hell yes. Kenya imagined they day she got married to a pretty bride, not being the pretty bride. Even in a fake marriage! N-not that it wasn’t an interesting concept to explore or anything, but wpoelhsd. NO! Nonono! Which gave cue to Kenya pressing her hands against Yuushi’s chest, face pulling away as her expression gained a somewhat pout over top the serious air of ‘hell no’. “That’s how those things usually end, right? I’m not puttin’ a dress on, even now. You can forget that!”
She pushed at him and he let her. He would never force her. He would never be like that. But he reached out for her and lightly stroked her face. A gentle, loving carress. “Kenya.” How to put this gently. How to say this without her hating him and without him speaking that dreaded truth that hovered over the both of them. “I’m not going to do that. I’d never make a mockery of marriage. You should know that.” He was dancing on the edge of bringing up the fact that they would be marrying...someone not the other. He would be at Kenya’s wedding. As a guest. Watching the one he could never have saying his I Dos to some woman he would be jealous of for the rest of his life. It was...utterly depressing to know that. To know that it was inevitable. So he didn’t want to think about it. Didn’t want to even acknowledge it.
“And I’d never stuff you into a dress of any sort. I find you attractive just like this. Comfortable and warm. So, no...how things like this usually end is with a very passionate kiss. Let the couple on the screen have their wedding. I have you and that’s so much better.”
Oh. Well. That... made it better, she guessed. And she should have honestly expected that answer from such a romantic, but she was still under the impression that he’d do whatever humiliated her more. Whatever was the most evil and uncomfortable for her to bear. Kenya looked visibly more comfortable knowing she wouldn’t have to wear a dress, however guilty she felt that she’d jumped to a horrible conclusion that seemed to make Yuushi look sad. Most people couldn’t see past the mask he held up, but Kenya could always see it in his eyes but was always too dumb and huffy and let him suffer for a while.
But something... about what he said struck her hard. Like a blow to the face, really. ‘I find you attractive just like this’... Kenya knew Yuushi meant as a woman. Their taboo love story started and ended with Kenya’s vagina and breasts, and whatever mood she’d been in before, it turned somber. Instead of being pure sunshine itself, Kenya now felt like the dark side of the moon and it showed when whatever smile she had didn’t hold any more light. “A-ah, ‘kay. Just... checking. haha Cause I didn’t think I’d look good in it or anything. And who knows when you’ll find anyone you’d wanna marry enough to put them in one, can’t lose your chances now.”
He had said something wrong. He knew that the moment her hands slid away. He just know it. What had he said though? He was sure he had said everything right...but he couldn’t have. So what was it? What? What had made her lose her glorious smile? Did she too realize that one day, through no fault of their own, they would be forced to marry. Their parents would never allow them to live as bachelors forever. He wished he knew what it was, so he could take it back...but it was out and there was no edits or redos. He just had to try and recover. Bring back that lost smile.
“You...” Yuushi leaned back a little to look at her. If it was what he thought it was, and Kenya was thinking about their unfortunate future...“You’ll be in a tux. Handsome and perfect. You’ll rush the priest because weddings are long and boring and tedious. And then...you’ll walk past me with your bride...and I will be the most jealous man on the face of the planet on that day. And I’ll watch you go and find a reason not to go to the reception, because I won’t be able to sit there and watch. I won’t be able to watch the one person that means the very most to me with someone else and know I can never, never have him again.” It was the most straightforward and honest Yuushi had ever been. In one breath, he was admitting more than just the deep hurt for the future, but that he did love Kenya. Love him as more than a cousin should...Love. HIM. “And I don’t like to think about that.” Because he knew grooms had perfect ideal weddings too. Yuushi’s ideal wasn’t something one found on the cover of Modern Bride. Because men didn’t marry each other and cousins definitely didn’t marry unless they were from a place in American called Kentucky.
He sighed softly and leaned back, letting her go to just stare at the ceiling. Having said all of that had really drained him. Who knew actually expressing one’s innermost feelings were that tiring. “So...” He continued, just watching the ceiling. “I just want to pretend for a little longer, that I can have you. And that you’ll still want that, even after you turn back. Because I know I will.” Even if he knew once Kenya became male again, he probably wouldn’t even be remotely attracted to him any more.
Was Kenya hearing things or did... did whatever misunderstanding they have actually clear the air? What made Yuushi confess? H-how could he say something like that?! It was exactly what she wanted to hear, yet somehow it made her furious at the same time. Whether at him or their crummy lives, she wasn’t sure, but it lead to her quickly standing off the couch just to get away from him, expression more angry than she should probably let it.
“How could you say that stuff so easily?” Her voice was loud, angry, and she crossed her arms in front of herself. “Don’t you find us disgusting? We shouldn’t want to be together but we do! Isn’t that wrong? Don’t you wish we could just do something about it?”
There it was...rejection. He had felt it so many times before. But this time, it was different. When she stood, he could feel her taking his heart with her. Like that Indiana Jones movie. She ripped his heart, still beating from his chest in just that one move. His poor heart, shattered and broken once more. And this time...this time, he just didn’t have it in him. He just didn’t have the energy to put it back together again. This was the one rejection he would never recover from. He knew that. And all he could do against the sudden pang of utter loss was the one thing he knew was counter productive to this all. He threw up his walls. He shut himself down. He was there all right...but he wasn’t. Oshitari Yuushi was a body on the couch but little else. The ultimate in poker faces...the utter extinguishing of his soul.
He looked back at her with those dead eyes, not even reacting to her anger. Her rage. Her...utter disgust at him. She was right of course. It was. It was everything she said and more. It was just so wrong in every sense of the word and it still changed nothing. No matter how many walls he erected and how many masks he wore, it didn’t change his feelings for his cousin one iota. It was...frustrating really. “Kenya. I don’t care. I don’t care if it’s wrong or immoral or a million other things. I don’t care that it’s disgusting. I don’t care what anyone thinks about me. I DO care about you. Even if it makes you sick. Even if you can’t stand to be around me because I’m just that much of a deviant, it doesn’t change a thing for me. You’ve already rejected me. I have to live with that. But I can still love you all the same, regardless of how you feel for me. And yes...I wish there was something I could do. Something that could change everything. Something that would make it okay. But I’m not a magician and I’m not a miracle worker. It will never be okay. Not to anyone. Not my friends. Not my family. Not society. And frankly...all of those can jump off Tokyo Tower for all I care. I know what I want. And if you hate me for that, so be it.” And why...why did it have to be like this? Why couldn’t they just both not care and do what they wanted?
He thought she was rejecting him?! Gosh, for a tensai he was sure stupid. Kenya didn’t bother to feel bad about the soul crushing blow he must have felt from that dumb realization, which wasn’t true at all. In fact, she flopped grumpily onto a piece of the couch and drew her legs up, the proceeded to lightly smack her cousin’s side. “Yuushi, you’re an idiot.”
The only Oshitari that sucked with words sat right on the couch beside someone so masterful with them, that he was able to say exactly what he wanted and she understood it completely. Yet there she was, unable to figure out a way to tell him that she felt guilty for wanting him. Not because it was supposed to be disgusting and taboo, but because she didn’t feel bad that they were breaking it. That in order to even be together they’d have to lie to everyone they knew. Of course it was a great weight off of her chest to know that it wasn’t just her being a woman that Yuushi wanted. He wanted her when she was herself, all male.
“I had one off on myself that night you recited a poem, and you had me in the dressing room... and a bunch more here. What the hell makes you think I’m rejecting you, idiot?!” She stare at him, honestly dumbfounded that he couldn’t see that. “I mean yeah it was just sex, but I was still a virgin for a reason, and it’s not just because my dates weren’t interested.”
He took his glasses off for a moment, to look at them in his hands before putting them back before his eyes. He could feel the couch shift. She was sitting next to him. Suddenly, his side hurt. So she was hitting him now...and calling him a moron. He looked towards her and perhaps a small spark of life returned to him. He wasn’t an idiot. He was just used to rejection. He was used to the one he loved discovering they didn’t really want him and dumping him. He had just never been dumped before getting to have some nice proper dates first.
“The fact that I just confessed and you got angry. That you stood there and told me it was disgusting and that it was wrong. If that’s not a rejection, I don’t know what is.” He sighed and rubbed at his temples a moment before continuing on. “If you aren’t rejecting me...and I do still have a chance...I want to say it to you again. Properly. And damn the rest of the world.” He didn’t know if he should. If he should lower his walls and let himself completely feel again, but it was hard with her so close. It was hard when Kenya was admitting things in her own way. And honestly, this was probably something that had been a long time in coming...even before the poetry reading. “I...” Here went everything. “really do love you, Kenya. And you don’t have to answer me back. I just want you to know that. And I really don’t care what anyone else thinks. And I’m sorry.” He never said he was sorry to Kenya before in his memory. “I’m sorry it took this to make me say it to you. I should have said it to you a long time ago.”
“I didn’t reject you.” Kenya pouted. “I was angry ‘cause we’ll never be able to openly say what you just did. We can’t tell our friends who’s making us happy and who’s stealing us away from them when we go meet each other. It’s not fair!”
Maybe Kenya was acting kind of like a kid throwing a temper tantrum, but she was honestly angry that they couldn’t be a normal couple. They’d never get the same opportunities that even gay couples might get. They were just that taboo, and it honestly made her wish that maybe she’d stay a woman forever, if it meant that they could pretend in another part of Japan or the rest of the world that they were married just to get away from that stigma. Sighing, she tipped slightly to lean against Yuushi, nuzzling into him. “I don’t know if I love you back in the same way, but I know I care enough to want to be with you.”
Whatever walls he still had up crumbled like Berlin. She hadn’t rejected him. She hadn’t torn his still beating heart from his chest and tossed it into the garbage. She...He...Kenya...Kenya didn’t hate him for saying what he had. And it was sort of cute what had made the other mad. That they’d never get to be “normal.” But they had never been normal to begin with. So why try and be so now? Even more, that she was against him again, nuzzling into him. It was like the romantic comedy that the credits were now running on. The loud misunderstanding argument. Then the confession and the sweet end where they made up and all was happy and perfect. They’d never get perfect, but Yuushi would be more that pleased to live with happy. He didn’t even need her to say it back. And the rest...the rest he would deal with as it came. And perhaps, given enough time, he would be able to win Kenya over completely. To get the blond to love him just as much as he loved Kenya. It was a challenge and one he would definitely take on.
“I want to be with you too.” He stated “And I guess...just this once...I’ll say this. You were right...I’m an idiot for misunderstanding you.”
“Damn right you we--” Kenya had started responding until the words actually sank in. Did... Yuushi just say that she was right? Kenya was right? She puffed her chest out, feeling pretty damn smug and proud with herself. This win was hers! It made her laugh wickedly, nudging Yuushi lightly as she just smiled up at him. “Damn right you were an idiot, Yuu. But now you’re all mine, and you better not skirt chase on me!”
Her fingers came up to thread in Yuushi’s hair again as she twisted her body slightly. Without another word, Kenya pulled Yuushi into that passionate kiss he was egging at her for not that long ago. He’d earned it now. They both had. And best of all, Kenya didn’t feel insecure now. Uncomfortable about the future lies she’d have to tell, but that she could deal with another day, when it was more important than kissing Yuushi was now. Which was pretty damn top priority, if she did say so herself.
“Wanna move to the bed now?” She asked, pulling back to half smirk half smile at him. “We could do ~anything~ there.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it.” He would flirt. He would speak far too warmly and kindly to others, because that was just how to treated others. It had nothing to do with skirt chasing. Once he was with someone, he was with them, heart and soul, even if sometimes it didn’t seem like it. But Kenya would be his focus. And he was sure that Kenya knew that even if he did look like he was, he only loved his cousin. Definitely loved Kenya.
He kissed her deeply and made a soft sound of loss when she pulled away. But he didn’t have to be sad long. She was inviting him to bed again...And suggesting that they do...whatever they pleased there. “I think...I’ll move there right after this.” It wasn’t often he got to make out on a couch. Even even more rare to make out on the couch with his cousin. The bedroom could wait a while longer while he made sure that the blonde was thoroughly kissed. He would sweep her up a little and carry her off as soon as he was sure she was panting.
What: One Oshitari finds themselves wet and the other was the one with a bucket of water in hand
When: Aug 20th
Where: Kenya’s apartment
Rating: Fluff
Warnings: Cuteness and feels all over the place
Adjusting his glasses again, he sighed to himself once more. It was a...contented sound this time. Content to watch her. She really was lovely and adorable and he couldn’t stop watching her. Of course it was the same as when she was a he. He always kept an eye on Kenya when he could. The other moved so damn fast that sometimes he had troubles. But when the other slowed down enough...or he sped up a little...those times were the best. When they were on the same page. “Kenya.” He called out to her. “You don’t have to hurry. It won’t start for a while.”
When Kenya turned, she noticed Yuushi had moved from the floor to the couch and came back over to grab his discarded plate. She dumped it in the sink and rinsed it off in an expert way that said she’d probably done that a lot. Maybe even spring cleaned despite it being anything but spring. But when she was done, the water off and hands dry she started back toward the sofa. She moved slyly, not bothering to cover the fact that she was doing so too. In fact, Kenya smiled like the devil himself until she made her move.
One moment she was standing, and the next she slid right onto the couch, on top of Yuushi. Fingers splayed against thighs, as if to check see why there were lumps and lips twisted into a feigned frown. “Jeez, this couch is lumpy. Maybe I should beat it up?”
Instead, of course, she turned a little and snuggled into him. “Oh, I just had to find the comfy spot. Hehe!”
That smile. She was an Oshitari after all. He liked that look on her. That devious look. It made him eager to see what she had thought up for him. He refused to think that it might be something unpleasant. They weren’t arguing or competing. They were just being together. His anticipation was rewarded with her butt on his lap. He smiled warmly as she moved around and complained. “I’m not the one who bought the couch. I’m sure it came with the place.” He teased as she tried to get comfortable.
She snuggled against him finally and his heart skipped a beat. He didn’t doubt for a second that she felt it do so. She felt so perfect against him. She fit like a missing bit of a puzzle. This was meant to be. Nothing felt this natural that wasn’t. It...just wasn’t fair. The world must have truly hated him when it gave him Kenya as a relative and not as a stanger for him to woo. But would that really stop him? Right now, he didn’t think it mattered any more. They already crossed that bridge and burned it.
Arms wrapped around her, in a gentle, loving fashion. Not enough to keep her there should she want to move, but enough to say that he was there and holding her. That he wanted...needed to be close to her. He lightly kissed the top of her bleached hair and smiled against it. “You have some rather nice blankets, Kenya.” An eye for an eye...A couch for a blanket.
With Yuushi’s arms around her, she felt so warm and comfortable. Kenya didn’t mind being his blanket, but she did know that the chances of pulling another stunt like that when she was a man again were probably slim. It was less acceptable because of gender, right? She closed her eyes and forced the thoughts from her mind, not really wanting to be confused or burden herself with such heavy thoughts when she just wanted to enjoy being Yuushi’s blanket.
“Yeah, just too bad it’s not big enough to cover all of you. At least the important parts are, right?” She tipped her head slightly to look at him and flashed him a bright, sunny smile. “Y’can see though, right?”
Man, with his hair down he looked like someone straight out of those books he read. It made her want to reach back and play with his hair, fingers running through it before she kissed him. Instantly, with that thought, her cheeks grew pink and she looked back at the tv screen. She was sure that he’d be able to see exactly what she wanted to do, if she kept staring. oiwlehsdh That wasn’t acceptable!
He smiled a little and nuzzled her a little more. “I can see just fine.” he could. He saw just what he wanted to see. Her. Yes the television and the movie was right there, should he want to watch it. But honestly, he just wanted to look at her. He wanted to have eyes only on her. But he couldn’t stare long because he was sure she would notice and be unnerved by such a thing. Though with that smile she flashed, it was hard not to just stare. Stare and lightly, carefully, slide a hand under the hem of her shirt to just rest against her flesh. Fingertip just lightly stroking because he needed the contact. It was just the way he was. It actually did have nothing to do with sex this time. Just closeness.
He noted her blush when she looked back at him. A kiss. How easy it would be to drag her into a kiss. A long slow skilled kiss that sent her heart a racing and made them both forget that they were supposed to be watching a movie. He couldn’t help but kiss her. His lips pressing against her hair once she had turned back around. “Kenya...” He started. “if you want to later on....I’ll sleep out here tonight...” He didn’t want to. He really didn’t want to. He wanted to share the bed with her, but for once, he wanted to be a gentleman. Unless she invited him in. Then he would join her quite happily.
The second that Kenya felt the hem of her shirt lift and a warm hand slid against her, she tried not to think of dirty things. She didn’t want to only be like that with Yuushi, but she also didn’t know what kind of intention he had. So, she let it go and concentrated on the movie, of the colors moving and the content, even though she wasn’t sure what was going on at the moment.
Fortunately or unfortunately, Yuushi’s voice broke that concentration with his question. Oh. Hm.. Kenya was a good host, she couldn’t have him sleeping on the couch. It wasn’t how she was raised, often giving her bed up when she had friends over back home. It made her laugh, albeit a little nervously. “Nah, you have the bed I’ll sleep here... u-unless you just want to share like when we were kids?”
He had to shift away for a moment so that his cousin didn’t feel the smile forming on his lips. “No gentleman would ever let a lady sleep on the couch. And right now, you are a lady.” And honestly, even if he was a boy, he’d have made the same decision. “I think we can share.” He would like that. Curled together with his cousin, arms wrapped about her, nuzzled against her neck, sleeping soundly until morning....or afternoon in his case. “I’ll behave.” Well, unless Kenya didn’t want him to. Yuushi would be more than happy to be a bit naughty.
For now though, he was proving rather well that he could behave. His hand hadn’t moved up nor down. Just rested where it had been placed, drawing those little formless doodles on her abs. And every once in a while, dropping an unconscious kiss to her hair. After which, he would chuckle at something humorous happening in the movie and trying not to tear up when something romantic happened. Though he had seen it before, his heartstrings were still tugged by the plight on the screen. But it gave him hope too. If those two star crossed lovers could make it work out, why couldn’t they. Why couldn’t two male cousins love each other?
She was no lady, Yuushi! Even if she was female at the moment, she acted a lot like a man. A well mannered man, of course, but that still counted. R-right? It frustrated her, a little as she pouted at the screen to try and ignore the whole ordeal. She’d get him back, no doubt about that. Kenya could prank him or something.
“Jeez, you don’t have to treat me like a girl just cause I am one right now.” Or she could speak up, of course, despite the fact it was something of a mumble rather than a gripe. Kenya sighed, though, and wiggled in irritation as she stare at the tv again. Trying to watch a romantic comedy was at least entertaining. It had funny bits that she could laugh at, and soon her annoyance ebbed away to enjoy the movie. In fact, she even relaxed again and scooted closer if at all possible. And when things got emotional, since she did know Yuushi so well, she reached down to thread her fingers with his on her stomach, giving his hand a nice squeeze to let him know that she was there. Yuushi got stupid with those sorts of things, and it was kind of amusing as much as it was sweet.
He chuckled a little. Of course he didn’t have to treat her like one. But he would. He would until she turned back. Because every woman deserved to feel special and loved. And after she turned back...he would still treat Kenya as he had. Because his cousin deserved that feeling, no matter what gender. “All right...all right.” He murmured. He was agreeing only because he knew that would placate her. He wouldn’t actually do it though.
He felt her movement and blinked when her fingers twined with his. He was grateful for that. He knew what was coming up. That part of the movie where the girl and the guy ended up fighting really badly and yelling at each other. Saying angry things about everything that was wrong with them and their relationship and how it...Just. Wouldn’t. Work. And then after it was all out...and the girl was crying...the man realizing he didn’t care and coming back to comfort her. Kissing her tears away and confessing that he did still love her. That he wanted to be with her despite all of that. And Yuushi watched it all. Ate it all up and sniffled a little. It was just...so...beautiful. And he was okay with softly crying right along with the couple because Kenya was right there, holding his hand.
His arms tightened a little around her, holding her closer when the lovers on the movie embraced again. When they kissed, he considered once more, kissing her, but instead just cuddled her. He didn’t want her to think he was only kissing her because of the movie.
Movies like the one they were watching were always a rollercoaster. She remembered once watching The Ugly Truth, where she was amused that it was basically about men versus women on sex and relationships, but toward the end she was actually hoping that they would stop being stupid and just kiss already. It was sort of like that now, as she watched. And stupid as it was, she had the same thought as her cousin but was less bashful about doing it.
Kenya’s hand pulled Yuushi’s up to her lips and gently kissed the top of it, fingers still linked with his as they were. A moment later she was pulling their hands toward her chest where she cuddled it like a pillow and smiled up at him. Even as a man, she probably would have at last pulled the idiot into a hug while he cried at the stupid mush on the tv. In all honesty, the way Yuushi always reacted to such things really made her wonder why she’d become the woman and not the other way around. Then again, things probably would have ended up different. Yuushi probably wouldn’t even bother with Kenya if the tables were turned. Or maybe she just had a low opinion of herself?
She truly was a treasure. He was certain of that now. The way she cared for him. The way she kissed his fingers and cuddled him when he was feeling low because of the heart wrenching images was truly astounding. He forgot all about not wanting her to think it was the movie doing it. It was her doing it. His free hand moved to lightly cup her chin. He could tell her later, how the movie ended. But he wanted this right now. And if she smacked him...she smacked him. But he just couldn’t stop himself at the moment.
Shifting a little, he lightly pressed his lips to hers. Another chaste kiss, in thanks for being there for him when he needed it. But with a small promise that it could become a lot more than that. That he wanted it to grow a bit more passionate.
For whatever reason, Kenya was kind of stunned that Yuushi pulled her into a sweet kiss. She wasn’t expecting it, and instead thought he wanted to see the end of the movie because that was always the best part of romantic comedies. The guy gets the girl or vice versa and all is well in the world. But he was missing it just to kiss her. It tugged at Kenya’s own heart a bit, but she allowed it, even if she pulled back a bit a moment later.
“Yuu, you’re gonna miss the end.” Soft brown eyes looked up into dark blue, wondering what he’d do. Should she really be leading him on the way she was? Kenya wasn’t being much different than any other women, but... she wanted that closeness too, and just didn’t want to admit it aloud. Kenya was a nice person but somehow people just didn’t seem to be interested in anything long term. Yet Yuushi had known her, her whole life. It was just easier when she gave in to him because she did care for him. It was just wrong, the kind of way it was.
Despite her words, Kenya found herself reaching up to thread her fingers in loose strands of Yuushi’s hair. She didn’t do more than that, aside from smile. Didn’t want to encroach on the ending for him, but couldn’t help herself.
“I think...” He stated, lightly brushing their lips together as he spoke, “That I have my happy ending right here.” He stole another kiss. He didn’t mind being led on. He didn’t mind that she was the way she was. He adored Kenya. He truly did. He had from the first time they had been brought together at some family function. He adored Kenya enough that the man had grown to even like the other’s pet. He, who didn’t really enjoy creepy crawly things, even had a soft spot for the iguana that he knew was somewhere in the apartment.
His fingertips brushed her face fondly and once more, he kissed her. Three for three. Each time, the kiss grew a little longer. A little more intense. “Besides... I think I’ve seen this one. I can tell you how it ends. Or better yet...I can show you, hmmm?” He rubbed their noses together fondly.
With each kiss Kenya’s body shifted a bit more so the angle wouldn’t be as awkward. By the time Yuushi rubbed their noses together she was facing away from the television entirely, cheeks threatening to heat up again. “Y-you’re not going to mock marry me, are you?”
Was she nervous? Hell yes. Kenya imagined they day she got married to a pretty bride, not being the pretty bride. Even in a fake marriage! N-not that it wasn’t an interesting concept to explore or anything, but wpoelhsd. NO! Nonono! Which gave cue to Kenya pressing her hands against Yuushi’s chest, face pulling away as her expression gained a somewhat pout over top the serious air of ‘hell no’. “That’s how those things usually end, right? I’m not puttin’ a dress on, even now. You can forget that!”
She pushed at him and he let her. He would never force her. He would never be like that. But he reached out for her and lightly stroked her face. A gentle, loving carress. “Kenya.” How to put this gently. How to say this without her hating him and without him speaking that dreaded truth that hovered over the both of them. “I’m not going to do that. I’d never make a mockery of marriage. You should know that.” He was dancing on the edge of bringing up the fact that they would be marrying...someone not the other. He would be at Kenya’s wedding. As a guest. Watching the one he could never have saying his I Dos to some woman he would be jealous of for the rest of his life. It was...utterly depressing to know that. To know that it was inevitable. So he didn’t want to think about it. Didn’t want to even acknowledge it.
“And I’d never stuff you into a dress of any sort. I find you attractive just like this. Comfortable and warm. So, no...how things like this usually end is with a very passionate kiss. Let the couple on the screen have their wedding. I have you and that’s so much better.”
Oh. Well. That... made it better, she guessed. And she should have honestly expected that answer from such a romantic, but she was still under the impression that he’d do whatever humiliated her more. Whatever was the most evil and uncomfortable for her to bear. Kenya looked visibly more comfortable knowing she wouldn’t have to wear a dress, however guilty she felt that she’d jumped to a horrible conclusion that seemed to make Yuushi look sad. Most people couldn’t see past the mask he held up, but Kenya could always see it in his eyes but was always too dumb and huffy and let him suffer for a while.
But something... about what he said struck her hard. Like a blow to the face, really. ‘I find you attractive just like this’... Kenya knew Yuushi meant as a woman. Their taboo love story started and ended with Kenya’s vagina and breasts, and whatever mood she’d been in before, it turned somber. Instead of being pure sunshine itself, Kenya now felt like the dark side of the moon and it showed when whatever smile she had didn’t hold any more light. “A-ah, ‘kay. Just... checking. haha Cause I didn’t think I’d look good in it or anything. And who knows when you’ll find anyone you’d wanna marry enough to put them in one, can’t lose your chances now.”
He had said something wrong. He knew that the moment her hands slid away. He just know it. What had he said though? He was sure he had said everything right...but he couldn’t have. So what was it? What? What had made her lose her glorious smile? Did she too realize that one day, through no fault of their own, they would be forced to marry. Their parents would never allow them to live as bachelors forever. He wished he knew what it was, so he could take it back...but it was out and there was no edits or redos. He just had to try and recover. Bring back that lost smile.
“You...” Yuushi leaned back a little to look at her. If it was what he thought it was, and Kenya was thinking about their unfortunate future...“You’ll be in a tux. Handsome and perfect. You’ll rush the priest because weddings are long and boring and tedious. And then...you’ll walk past me with your bride...and I will be the most jealous man on the face of the planet on that day. And I’ll watch you go and find a reason not to go to the reception, because I won’t be able to sit there and watch. I won’t be able to watch the one person that means the very most to me with someone else and know I can never, never have him again.” It was the most straightforward and honest Yuushi had ever been. In one breath, he was admitting more than just the deep hurt for the future, but that he did love Kenya. Love him as more than a cousin should...Love. HIM. “And I don’t like to think about that.” Because he knew grooms had perfect ideal weddings too. Yuushi’s ideal wasn’t something one found on the cover of Modern Bride. Because men didn’t marry each other and cousins definitely didn’t marry unless they were from a place in American called Kentucky.
He sighed softly and leaned back, letting her go to just stare at the ceiling. Having said all of that had really drained him. Who knew actually expressing one’s innermost feelings were that tiring. “So...” He continued, just watching the ceiling. “I just want to pretend for a little longer, that I can have you. And that you’ll still want that, even after you turn back. Because I know I will.” Even if he knew once Kenya became male again, he probably wouldn’t even be remotely attracted to him any more.
Was Kenya hearing things or did... did whatever misunderstanding they have actually clear the air? What made Yuushi confess? H-how could he say something like that?! It was exactly what she wanted to hear, yet somehow it made her furious at the same time. Whether at him or their crummy lives, she wasn’t sure, but it lead to her quickly standing off the couch just to get away from him, expression more angry than she should probably let it.
“How could you say that stuff so easily?” Her voice was loud, angry, and she crossed her arms in front of herself. “Don’t you find us disgusting? We shouldn’t want to be together but we do! Isn’t that wrong? Don’t you wish we could just do something about it?”
There it was...rejection. He had felt it so many times before. But this time, it was different. When she stood, he could feel her taking his heart with her. Like that Indiana Jones movie. She ripped his heart, still beating from his chest in just that one move. His poor heart, shattered and broken once more. And this time...this time, he just didn’t have it in him. He just didn’t have the energy to put it back together again. This was the one rejection he would never recover from. He knew that. And all he could do against the sudden pang of utter loss was the one thing he knew was counter productive to this all. He threw up his walls. He shut himself down. He was there all right...but he wasn’t. Oshitari Yuushi was a body on the couch but little else. The ultimate in poker faces...the utter extinguishing of his soul.
He looked back at her with those dead eyes, not even reacting to her anger. Her rage. Her...utter disgust at him. She was right of course. It was. It was everything she said and more. It was just so wrong in every sense of the word and it still changed nothing. No matter how many walls he erected and how many masks he wore, it didn’t change his feelings for his cousin one iota. It was...frustrating really. “Kenya. I don’t care. I don’t care if it’s wrong or immoral or a million other things. I don’t care that it’s disgusting. I don’t care what anyone thinks about me. I DO care about you. Even if it makes you sick. Even if you can’t stand to be around me because I’m just that much of a deviant, it doesn’t change a thing for me. You’ve already rejected me. I have to live with that. But I can still love you all the same, regardless of how you feel for me. And yes...I wish there was something I could do. Something that could change everything. Something that would make it okay. But I’m not a magician and I’m not a miracle worker. It will never be okay. Not to anyone. Not my friends. Not my family. Not society. And frankly...all of those can jump off Tokyo Tower for all I care. I know what I want. And if you hate me for that, so be it.” And why...why did it have to be like this? Why couldn’t they just both not care and do what they wanted?
He thought she was rejecting him?! Gosh, for a tensai he was sure stupid. Kenya didn’t bother to feel bad about the soul crushing blow he must have felt from that dumb realization, which wasn’t true at all. In fact, she flopped grumpily onto a piece of the couch and drew her legs up, the proceeded to lightly smack her cousin’s side. “Yuushi, you’re an idiot.”
The only Oshitari that sucked with words sat right on the couch beside someone so masterful with them, that he was able to say exactly what he wanted and she understood it completely. Yet there she was, unable to figure out a way to tell him that she felt guilty for wanting him. Not because it was supposed to be disgusting and taboo, but because she didn’t feel bad that they were breaking it. That in order to even be together they’d have to lie to everyone they knew. Of course it was a great weight off of her chest to know that it wasn’t just her being a woman that Yuushi wanted. He wanted her when she was herself, all male.
“I had one off on myself that night you recited a poem, and you had me in the dressing room... and a bunch more here. What the hell makes you think I’m rejecting you, idiot?!” She stare at him, honestly dumbfounded that he couldn’t see that. “I mean yeah it was just sex, but I was still a virgin for a reason, and it’s not just because my dates weren’t interested.”
He took his glasses off for a moment, to look at them in his hands before putting them back before his eyes. He could feel the couch shift. She was sitting next to him. Suddenly, his side hurt. So she was hitting him now...and calling him a moron. He looked towards her and perhaps a small spark of life returned to him. He wasn’t an idiot. He was just used to rejection. He was used to the one he loved discovering they didn’t really want him and dumping him. He had just never been dumped before getting to have some nice proper dates first.
“The fact that I just confessed and you got angry. That you stood there and told me it was disgusting and that it was wrong. If that’s not a rejection, I don’t know what is.” He sighed and rubbed at his temples a moment before continuing on. “If you aren’t rejecting me...and I do still have a chance...I want to say it to you again. Properly. And damn the rest of the world.” He didn’t know if he should. If he should lower his walls and let himself completely feel again, but it was hard with her so close. It was hard when Kenya was admitting things in her own way. And honestly, this was probably something that had been a long time in coming...even before the poetry reading. “I...” Here went everything. “really do love you, Kenya. And you don’t have to answer me back. I just want you to know that. And I really don’t care what anyone else thinks. And I’m sorry.” He never said he was sorry to Kenya before in his memory. “I’m sorry it took this to make me say it to you. I should have said it to you a long time ago.”
“I didn’t reject you.” Kenya pouted. “I was angry ‘cause we’ll never be able to openly say what you just did. We can’t tell our friends who’s making us happy and who’s stealing us away from them when we go meet each other. It’s not fair!”
Maybe Kenya was acting kind of like a kid throwing a temper tantrum, but she was honestly angry that they couldn’t be a normal couple. They’d never get the same opportunities that even gay couples might get. They were just that taboo, and it honestly made her wish that maybe she’d stay a woman forever, if it meant that they could pretend in another part of Japan or the rest of the world that they were married just to get away from that stigma. Sighing, she tipped slightly to lean against Yuushi, nuzzling into him. “I don’t know if I love you back in the same way, but I know I care enough to want to be with you.”
Whatever walls he still had up crumbled like Berlin. She hadn’t rejected him. She hadn’t torn his still beating heart from his chest and tossed it into the garbage. She...He...Kenya...Kenya didn’t hate him for saying what he had. And it was sort of cute what had made the other mad. That they’d never get to be “normal.” But they had never been normal to begin with. So why try and be so now? Even more, that she was against him again, nuzzling into him. It was like the romantic comedy that the credits were now running on. The loud misunderstanding argument. Then the confession and the sweet end where they made up and all was happy and perfect. They’d never get perfect, but Yuushi would be more that pleased to live with happy. He didn’t even need her to say it back. And the rest...the rest he would deal with as it came. And perhaps, given enough time, he would be able to win Kenya over completely. To get the blond to love him just as much as he loved Kenya. It was a challenge and one he would definitely take on.
“I want to be with you too.” He stated “And I guess...just this once...I’ll say this. You were right...I’m an idiot for misunderstanding you.”
“Damn right you we--” Kenya had started responding until the words actually sank in. Did... Yuushi just say that she was right? Kenya was right? She puffed her chest out, feeling pretty damn smug and proud with herself. This win was hers! It made her laugh wickedly, nudging Yuushi lightly as she just smiled up at him. “Damn right you were an idiot, Yuu. But now you’re all mine, and you better not skirt chase on me!”
Her fingers came up to thread in Yuushi’s hair again as she twisted her body slightly. Without another word, Kenya pulled Yuushi into that passionate kiss he was egging at her for not that long ago. He’d earned it now. They both had. And best of all, Kenya didn’t feel insecure now. Uncomfortable about the future lies she’d have to tell, but that she could deal with another day, when it was more important than kissing Yuushi was now. Which was pretty damn top priority, if she did say so herself.
“Wanna move to the bed now?” She asked, pulling back to half smirk half smile at him. “We could do ~anything~ there.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it.” He would flirt. He would speak far too warmly and kindly to others, because that was just how to treated others. It had nothing to do with skirt chasing. Once he was with someone, he was with them, heart and soul, even if sometimes it didn’t seem like it. But Kenya would be his focus. And he was sure that Kenya knew that even if he did look like he was, he only loved his cousin. Definitely loved Kenya.
He kissed her deeply and made a soft sound of loss when she pulled away. But he didn’t have to be sad long. She was inviting him to bed again...And suggesting that they do...whatever they pleased there. “I think...I’ll move there right after this.” It wasn’t often he got to make out on a couch. Even even more rare to make out on the couch with his cousin. The bedroom could wait a while longer while he made sure that the blonde was thoroughly kissed. He would sweep her up a little and carry her off as soon as he was sure she was panting.