SO i find my self checking the weather, all the time. like a habit, OCD, and i am not sure why. i do not care if it rains. I am not a farmer, i do not need it to rain. but the best part is, is that i want it to rain.

Ryan

Walking, striding in fact. So decidedly, striding, over the wet but bare concrete that the sidewalk is composed of. Feeling empty, feeling poor, and wanting more. I advise, I tell that you always have a place in my heart. The beating being heavy now, you should feel, amazing. So I tell, I wanted you to know that. I am embarrassed, I am scared. Why ( Read more... )

You should check this out. it is kinda funny, but kinda serious.

http://www.inspot.org/assets/tell_card6_pop.jpg

I was thinking about becoming a father, not right now, but when i do. i was thinking that i would be a cool dad. but in a round about kind of way i am not sure that i would be a good dad. i look at my own father. his actions and how he handles us, and i look at my sisters husband and the definite contrast to how my father treated us. i want to be a ( Read more... )

I hate being treated like i am dumb. i think everyone does it to me. i think it is because i like to pretend so i can learn what people are really like. we are all so dishonest. lock me out, i am there to help, but just shut your fucking door, or better yet, slam my hand in it and then send me away. I am glad i have health insurance. although the ( Read more... )

So i am officialy the ladys man. i can not believe it ( Read more... )

So the cops just came over. I told David to be friggin quiet..

Ryan

I have to say that i was a complete ass to everyone today, and i am not sure why. i am sorry ( Read more... )

I ache from "mudding" the walls, WITH TONS OF THANX to CARLEY, and i have a dentist appt today. at least it will make my tooth stop hurting.

i know i am just complaining but that is going to have to be ok with ya'll

Ryan

I guess the real question is: who is going to take control? i think that you have to, but you do not want to. why would i want to? is this a game? can i make this whole post just questions? should i let life take it's course? am i being a bitch? why do people seam to be mad at me? and why can i not just relax ( Read more... )