The Ring (Gen, PG)
Title: The Ring
Author: ???
Pairing(s): None
Rating: PG
Category: Gen, fluff, humour
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, the real people in it are used without their permission and I definitely don't own them or have any copyright to any part of any of them. I do not believe any of this happened, is likely to happen or should happen it is simply a story created around known facts about those involved.
Summary: Georg gets a little revenge for some old over used jokes.
FQF Prompt: 55. As the band's older brother figure, Georg is used to getting asked for advice, but one day someone tells him a secret that he just can't keep to himself. Fluff/humor. - submitted by peki
Author's notes: It’s short, but I hope it fulfils the prompt and makes you smile :)
The Ring
Over the years, Georg had learnt to take full advantage of his days off. After a long lie-in he had had an excellent couple of hours with his personal trainer, followed by an extremely enjoyable session on Skype with his girlfriend. Now, with his favourite magazine tucked under his arm, he was about to take, what he fully intended to be, a very satisfying dump.
His hand was just hovering over the bathroom door handle when there was a knock at the door. Disgruntled at his routine being disturbed he went over and peeked through the spy-hole. He saw Tom, fidgeting with the hem of his t-shirt, shiftily looking from side to side, up and down the corridor.
It occurred to Georg for a second that he could pretend not to be there, but his friend looked agitated, so he let him in.
They had seen each other far too much lately to waste time on such things as greetings and niceties, so they sat down and Tom cut straight to the point. “Geo, I need your advice.”
“OK, sure.”
“But you can’t tell Bill.”
Georg groaned. “No Tom, not again.”
“What? Why?!”
“Because every time you ask me to keep something from Bill, you go and tell him anyway, then I look like the bad guy and he falls out with me instead of you.”
Tom squirmed guiltily. “I’m sorry about that. I don’t mean for it to happen it just…”
“Yeah yeah, never mind.” Georg shook his head. “What’s the problem?”
“I got another piercing.”
Georg raised his eyebrows. “Why are you asking me for advice on that? You know I’m untouched.” He grinned and flexed his muscles slightly. “Pristine. Surely Bill is the expert.”
“I don’t want him to know about it until it’s… uhm… ready for viewing.”
“Ready for viewing? What’s that supposed to mean?” Georg narrowed his eyes. “Wait a minute… where is this piercing?”
“M_ ___k,” Tom mumbled under his breath.
“Sorry?”
“My __ck.”
“I can’t hear you properly, speak up.”
“MY COCK! I HAVE A RING IN MY COCK!”
“HA!”
Tom whined, “Georg, don’t…”
“HA! I knew it! And after all those jokes you and Bill have made in interviews about my ‘downstairs piercing’!” Georg rubbed his hands together gleefully. “When did you have this done? And how on earth did you keep it secret from Bill?”
“It was a few days ago, on our last day off, when Bill had gone out shopping.”
“I see…” Georg nodded. “More importantly, why?” He frowned. “It’s not some twin thing is it, like a dare or a bet?”
“No, I wanted it done. I’ve been thinking about it for a while -I wanted it to be my thing.”
“Well, it certainly is that.”
“Though I would kinda like to shut him up one time, you know.”
“Yeah, well, good luck with that.” Georg laughed. “You’ve got your lip ring and you’ve started those nasty things in your ears, what more does he want? You need to explain to me.”
“He thinks I should get a tattoo.” Tom sighed. “He knows I won’t have one, he’s only teasing, but he does go on sometimes… then he starts on about nipples…”
“So next time he starts up, you just want to whip it out and…”
“TA-DA!” Tom laughed. “Yeah, something like that.”
Georg chuckled at the thought. “Anyway, what do you need me for?”
“I’m having a bit of trouble,” Tom lowered his voice to a whisper, “with the healing process.”
“OK…” Georg pursed his lips. “I need to see.”
“NO!”
“C’mon, I’ve seen it before.”
“Eee… alright, but bear in mind it’s not in it’s usual state… size-wise.” Tom stood up, lifted his t-shirt, dropped his jeans and held out the front of his shorts.
Georg peered in and winced. “Ouch, that looks sore. Poor little thing.”
“I told you, it’s retreated due to illness!” Tom pulled his jeans back up. “I’m doing everything the piercer told me. I’m really looking after it.”
“Even more than usual?”
“There’s nothing wrong with a well maintained cock.”
“I’m sure you wash it almost as many times as you do your hands. I’m surprised you don’t wear a cock glove.”
“You can get those?”
Georg rolled his eyes and reached for his laptop. “OK, lets see what the world wide web has to say on the subject. I presume you already looked.”
Tom sat down again. “I couldn’t! Bill is always noseying around what I’m doing on the computer.”
“He does that to me too, my girlfriend is always spotting him snooping around behind me on the web cam. I don’t think he’s quite worked out how it works yet.” Georg smiled to himself as he started a search.
Tom hobbled uncomfortably over to the mini bar and got them some drinks, then sat back down, reading over Georg’s shoulder. “Find anything?”
“Hmm… I think I can help. Wait.” Georg put the laptop down on the table and went to his suitcase. He rummaged around for a second then turned back, triumphantly waving something in the air. “I knew they were here!”
Tom frowned. “What are they?”
“These, my friend, are my lucky underpants.”
He tossed them to Tom, who held them out distastefully in front of him. “Lucky? Ugh, these are gross.”
The offending items were old-style men’s briefs, pale blue with a burgundy stripe. They were frayed at the elastics, and if you put your hand in them you could poke your fingers through a number of unfortunately placed holes.
Georg folded his arms. “You see you have the baggy trousers, but your overpriced designer shorts are too tight. You need support but you also need air circulation.”
“I’m not wearing your grody old briefs Georg.” Tom chucked them back at his friend.
Georg shrugged as he caught them. “Do you want your dick to drop off?”
Tom paled and grabbed them back. “Ohhhh… Give me those.”
He shuffled off to the bathroom and after a few minutes he emerged, smiling. “Georg, these are com-for-ta-ble!” He swayed his hips from side to side then attempted a rather awkward thrust. “Hoo yah!” He grimaced in pain. “OK, not quite ready for that yet.”
Georg laughed. “Well, don’t get too attached to them, because as soon as you’re all healed I want them back.”
“No problemo, Georg-io!”
Georg shook his head and laughed again. “OK, Tom-io, glad to be of help.” He ushered his friend towards the door. “Now get out of here, I have business to attend to.”
“Big business?”
“Just get out.”
-----
With Tom safely gone, Georg took his phone from his pocket and hit the speed dial. “Hey Gus, guess what?!”
“Georg, I’m glad you called, I’ve just had Bill in here - Is Tom keeping something from him?”
“Why do you ask?”
“So he is?”
“Gus, that’s exactly what I called to tell you…”
-----
Next day at sound check, Tom strode on to the stage. He was in an excellent mood - it was a beautiful day and everyone had seemed to be happy and smiling as he had walked through the venue.
Georg was already setting up, tinkering with his keyboards. “Hey Tom,” he winked, “how’s it hangin’?”
Tom gave him the thumbs up sign. “All good, it’s looking much better already.”
“That’s great, I’m glad I could help.”
“Thanks Geo. Don’t forget it’s just between us though, right.”
“I didn’t tell Bill.”
“Good. Thanks again.”
“I told Gus.”
“WHAT?!”
“I told Gus.”
“GUS? You told Gustav?! Georg, you know what a blabbermouth he is! He will have told all the sound techs and the roadies! And that’s just for starters! He’s such a gossip! Oh my God!” He flung his arms in the air. “GEORG!”
Suddenly music rang out through the speakers.
“Love… is a burning flame… and it makes… a fiery ring…”
< BA DA DUM >
Tom spun around to find Gustav, who was sitting on the drum riser, grinning from ear to ear. “Hey,” he shrugged, laughing, “you know how much I love Johnny Cash!”
Tom spun round again and was horrified to see a small crowd gathered on the floor before him, comprising of techs, roadies, staff… and Bill. They started to cheer and clap as the music continued.
“And it burns, burns, burns… the ring of fire… the ring of fire”
Tom groaned and turned to Georg. “I can’t believe you did this.”
Georg managed to contain his laughter for a moment. “Just getting my own back.” He grinned. “Hey, don’t complain, you’re their hero!”
Tom looked back at the cheering crew and did the only thing he could at that point - he made a couple of thrusts as the spotlight shone on him, then he took a bow.
-----
FIN
-----
Listen here: Ring of Fire by Johnny Cash
Author: ???
Pairing(s): None
Rating: PG
Category: Gen, fluff, humour
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, the real people in it are used without their permission and I definitely don't own them or have any copyright to any part of any of them. I do not believe any of this happened, is likely to happen or should happen it is simply a story created around known facts about those involved.
Summary: Georg gets a little revenge for some old over used jokes.
FQF Prompt: 55. As the band's older brother figure, Georg is used to getting asked for advice, but one day someone tells him a secret that he just can't keep to himself. Fluff/humor. - submitted by peki
Author's notes: It’s short, but I hope it fulfils the prompt and makes you smile :)
The Ring
Over the years, Georg had learnt to take full advantage of his days off. After a long lie-in he had had an excellent couple of hours with his personal trainer, followed by an extremely enjoyable session on Skype with his girlfriend. Now, with his favourite magazine tucked under his arm, he was about to take, what he fully intended to be, a very satisfying dump.
His hand was just hovering over the bathroom door handle when there was a knock at the door. Disgruntled at his routine being disturbed he went over and peeked through the spy-hole. He saw Tom, fidgeting with the hem of his t-shirt, shiftily looking from side to side, up and down the corridor.
It occurred to Georg for a second that he could pretend not to be there, but his friend looked agitated, so he let him in.
They had seen each other far too much lately to waste time on such things as greetings and niceties, so they sat down and Tom cut straight to the point. “Geo, I need your advice.”
“OK, sure.”
“But you can’t tell Bill.”
Georg groaned. “No Tom, not again.”
“What? Why?!”
“Because every time you ask me to keep something from Bill, you go and tell him anyway, then I look like the bad guy and he falls out with me instead of you.”
Tom squirmed guiltily. “I’m sorry about that. I don’t mean for it to happen it just…”
“Yeah yeah, never mind.” Georg shook his head. “What’s the problem?”
“I got another piercing.”
Georg raised his eyebrows. “Why are you asking me for advice on that? You know I’m untouched.” He grinned and flexed his muscles slightly. “Pristine. Surely Bill is the expert.”
“I don’t want him to know about it until it’s… uhm… ready for viewing.”
“Ready for viewing? What’s that supposed to mean?” Georg narrowed his eyes. “Wait a minute… where is this piercing?”
“M_ ___k,” Tom mumbled under his breath.
“Sorry?”
“My __ck.”
“I can’t hear you properly, speak up.”
“MY COCK! I HAVE A RING IN MY COCK!”
“HA!”
Tom whined, “Georg, don’t…”
“HA! I knew it! And after all those jokes you and Bill have made in interviews about my ‘downstairs piercing’!” Georg rubbed his hands together gleefully. “When did you have this done? And how on earth did you keep it secret from Bill?”
“It was a few days ago, on our last day off, when Bill had gone out shopping.”
“I see…” Georg nodded. “More importantly, why?” He frowned. “It’s not some twin thing is it, like a dare or a bet?”
“No, I wanted it done. I’ve been thinking about it for a while -I wanted it to be my thing.”
“Well, it certainly is that.”
“Though I would kinda like to shut him up one time, you know.”
“Yeah, well, good luck with that.” Georg laughed. “You’ve got your lip ring and you’ve started those nasty things in your ears, what more does he want? You need to explain to me.”
“He thinks I should get a tattoo.” Tom sighed. “He knows I won’t have one, he’s only teasing, but he does go on sometimes… then he starts on about nipples…”
“So next time he starts up, you just want to whip it out and…”
“TA-DA!” Tom laughed. “Yeah, something like that.”
Georg chuckled at the thought. “Anyway, what do you need me for?”
“I’m having a bit of trouble,” Tom lowered his voice to a whisper, “with the healing process.”
“OK…” Georg pursed his lips. “I need to see.”
“NO!”
“C’mon, I’ve seen it before.”
“Eee… alright, but bear in mind it’s not in it’s usual state… size-wise.” Tom stood up, lifted his t-shirt, dropped his jeans and held out the front of his shorts.
Georg peered in and winced. “Ouch, that looks sore. Poor little thing.”
“I told you, it’s retreated due to illness!” Tom pulled his jeans back up. “I’m doing everything the piercer told me. I’m really looking after it.”
“Even more than usual?”
“There’s nothing wrong with a well maintained cock.”
“I’m sure you wash it almost as many times as you do your hands. I’m surprised you don’t wear a cock glove.”
“You can get those?”
Georg rolled his eyes and reached for his laptop. “OK, lets see what the world wide web has to say on the subject. I presume you already looked.”
Tom sat down again. “I couldn’t! Bill is always noseying around what I’m doing on the computer.”
“He does that to me too, my girlfriend is always spotting him snooping around behind me on the web cam. I don’t think he’s quite worked out how it works yet.” Georg smiled to himself as he started a search.
Tom hobbled uncomfortably over to the mini bar and got them some drinks, then sat back down, reading over Georg’s shoulder. “Find anything?”
“Hmm… I think I can help. Wait.” Georg put the laptop down on the table and went to his suitcase. He rummaged around for a second then turned back, triumphantly waving something in the air. “I knew they were here!”
Tom frowned. “What are they?”
“These, my friend, are my lucky underpants.”
He tossed them to Tom, who held them out distastefully in front of him. “Lucky? Ugh, these are gross.”
The offending items were old-style men’s briefs, pale blue with a burgundy stripe. They were frayed at the elastics, and if you put your hand in them you could poke your fingers through a number of unfortunately placed holes.
Georg folded his arms. “You see you have the baggy trousers, but your overpriced designer shorts are too tight. You need support but you also need air circulation.”
“I’m not wearing your grody old briefs Georg.” Tom chucked them back at his friend.
Georg shrugged as he caught them. “Do you want your dick to drop off?”
Tom paled and grabbed them back. “Ohhhh… Give me those.”
He shuffled off to the bathroom and after a few minutes he emerged, smiling. “Georg, these are com-for-ta-ble!” He swayed his hips from side to side then attempted a rather awkward thrust. “Hoo yah!” He grimaced in pain. “OK, not quite ready for that yet.”
Georg laughed. “Well, don’t get too attached to them, because as soon as you’re all healed I want them back.”
“No problemo, Georg-io!”
Georg shook his head and laughed again. “OK, Tom-io, glad to be of help.” He ushered his friend towards the door. “Now get out of here, I have business to attend to.”
“Big business?”
“Just get out.”
-----
With Tom safely gone, Georg took his phone from his pocket and hit the speed dial. “Hey Gus, guess what?!”
“Georg, I’m glad you called, I’ve just had Bill in here - Is Tom keeping something from him?”
“Why do you ask?”
“So he is?”
“Gus, that’s exactly what I called to tell you…”
-----
Next day at sound check, Tom strode on to the stage. He was in an excellent mood - it was a beautiful day and everyone had seemed to be happy and smiling as he had walked through the venue.
Georg was already setting up, tinkering with his keyboards. “Hey Tom,” he winked, “how’s it hangin’?”
Tom gave him the thumbs up sign. “All good, it’s looking much better already.”
“That’s great, I’m glad I could help.”
“Thanks Geo. Don’t forget it’s just between us though, right.”
“I didn’t tell Bill.”
“Good. Thanks again.”
“I told Gus.”
“WHAT?!”
“I told Gus.”
“GUS? You told Gustav?! Georg, you know what a blabbermouth he is! He will have told all the sound techs and the roadies! And that’s just for starters! He’s such a gossip! Oh my God!” He flung his arms in the air. “GEORG!”
Suddenly music rang out through the speakers.
“Love… is a burning flame… and it makes… a fiery ring…”
< BA DA DUM >
Tom spun around to find Gustav, who was sitting on the drum riser, grinning from ear to ear. “Hey,” he shrugged, laughing, “you know how much I love Johnny Cash!”
Tom spun round again and was horrified to see a small crowd gathered on the floor before him, comprising of techs, roadies, staff… and Bill. They started to cheer and clap as the music continued.
“And it burns, burns, burns… the ring of fire… the ring of fire”
Tom groaned and turned to Georg. “I can’t believe you did this.”
Georg managed to contain his laughter for a moment. “Just getting my own back.” He grinned. “Hey, don’t complain, you’re their hero!”
Tom looked back at the cheering crew and did the only thing he could at that point - he made a couple of thrusts as the spotlight shone on him, then he took a bow.
-----
FIN
-----
Listen here: Ring of Fire by Johnny Cash