bOnce there was a boy named Loren who loved eating toast. Early one morning his mother made him 50 pieces of toast for breakfast so he did a double backflip. After breakfast he went outside to play in the snow barefooted an d stepped on a pencil. He loudly shouted "HOLY COW". He immediately went inside to check his awesome shaggy hair. His sister thought he looked like a monkey, so he shot her in the face. Then Davey came in and broke his finger...that sinny bastard. Then he let out a burp so hard he tasted the jelly that was on his toast. He quickly grabbed his rifle and stepped outside. Poor Davey got caught up in the gun fire. By then he was pissed off so he shot the moon, causing it to fall to the earth. He stepped inside and ate a turkey burger while looking out the window at the shot up moon in his front yard. After eating his turkey burger he went to sleep and dreamt of a samurai fighting ninja interuppted by pirates halfway through the night. He then dreamt of a world where Justin Rodriguez didn't make gay posts,
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