Fic: Rogue (Gabriel/M, Gabriel/F, PG-13) 9/36
For full notes and other chapters, please see the Masterpost.
Notes: This is the third part of the Missing an Angel series. It is recommended that you read the first two before reading this one.
I'm officially declaring this story canon-compliant as of mid-season 9. This second half makes it non-compliant, unfortunately. Damn those Supernatural writers!
Chapter Rating: PG-13
Chapter word count: 1,368
Chapter Summary: Fergus’ life is much more restricted than Cariel’s was and far more restricted than Gabriel’s is.
CHAPTER 9:
All I Have
Gabriel flew around the world twice, wrapping it east to west and north to south. He dove into the ocean, streaking down to the lowest depths and letting the crushing weight of the water sink into his core to make him as miserable outside as he was inside. He emerged from the water at the feet of the cliffs of Canisbay, shaking himself off under the cover of the new moon. The angel raised his hand to snap his fingers and dry his wings but stopped before carrying out the magic. Let them be wet. What did he care?
Grimacing in discomfort, Gabriel folded his waterlogged wings against his back and began the long trek around the cliffs to where the land sloped more gradually to the waves, then up past the little village and over to the cottage he had come to call home.
Fergus was sitting on the ground outside, leaning against the doorpost. His arms were wrapped around drawn-up knees, one hand dangling down to twist fingers through Thorn’s fur. He looked utterly miserable even though Thorn’s chest rose and fell steadily, his tail occasionally giving a little thump against Fergus’ feet. Gabriel could see from here that the dog was whole and healthy again, unblemished from his brush with death.
A thousand options ran through Gabriel’s mind-I see your dog is back. Congratulations, you’re a witch. Was it everything you were hoping for? Happy now?-but he rejected them all. Instead, he simply hooked his thumbs into his belt and came to a stop in front of Fergus, his feet in the exact point the young man was staring at.
Fergus lifted his head slowly, dark eyes trailing up Gabriel’s body until they met his own golden ones. Fergus swallowed, his fingers twitching against Thorn’s fur.
For the longest time, human and angel stayed locked in their stare, neither wanting to be the first to break the silence. Eventually, Thorn spoke for both of them, giving a heavy whuff of breath in his continued sleep. Fergus looked down, breaking the stare. “I did it.”
“I see that.”
Fergus’ shoulders slumped, and he closed his eyes. “You’re mad at me.”
“No, not mad.” Gabriel sighed, rocking onto his toes for a moment before closing the distance between them. He turned to lean against the stone wall of the cottage and slid down until he was seated beside Fergus. “Not at you, at least.”
Fergus glanced at Gabriel, and Gabriel invited him in with a cock of his head and a weak smile. Fergus’ answering smile was just as weak, but he leaned in to rest against Gabriel’s shoulder. “Then who?”
“Myself.” Gabriel slid his arm around Fergus’ shoulders, holding him close, and wrapped them both in his wings. “Your uncle. Your mother. The demon who’s now lending you her powers.”
“Mistress didn’t seem evil,” Fergus murmured. “She came to us like a child, a little girl.”
Gabriel huffed derisively and shook his head. “She does that. Corrupter of the innocent. That little girl was a real little girl, somewhere, and that demon possessed her. It slid into her mind and held her hostage, getting off on her screams as she did horrible things with her body. Probably killed her parents and made the child watch. That’s what she does, Fergus. It’s who she is, how she was created.”
“How would you know? You’ve never met her.”
“Are you sure?” Gabriel arched one eyebrow at Fergus.
“I asked her. She said her path has never crossed with yours.”
“Not like this it hasn’t,” Gabriel agreed. “We’ve met before, several times, but she never knew it was me.” He touched a finger to his lips. “I’m sneaky like that.”
Honestly, Gabriel wasn’t sure if Lilith would recognize him in this form or not. She knew his sword, certainly, but could she see his wings? Could she feel his grace? Gabriel didn’t know, and he didn’t want to find out that she could. He avoided the powerful demons, just in case. Lilith, Azazel, Alastair, Beelzebub, and Abaddon. These were the demons who had survived the war with Heaven, the demons who had undeniable proof of the existence of angels. Lilith, the first demon, ancient and cunning. Azazel and Alastair, the leaders of the fallen fallen, Lucifer’s most trusted servants. Beelzebub and Abaddon, the last two Knights of Hell, the elite anti-angel fighting force created from the double-fallen. Gabriel did not want to attract their attention any more than he wanted that of his brothers.
It was Fergus’ turn to sigh, pressing in closer to Gabriel’s side. He shivered a little beneath Gabriel’s damp wings, and the angel frowned. He stoked his grace, spreading it into his feathers and boiling away the last of the water that still clung to him. Now Fergus settled down, blanketed by Gabriel’s heat. “Is it bad that I liked her?”
“It’s not good,” Gabriel hedged. Demons could be charming when they wanted to be. It was a necessary skill for their survival as a species. Demons needed to be able to lure humans to their side, and while there would always be humans drawn to the demonic, there were far more who were normal people with normal lives needing a little more of a carrot before being ensnared by evil.
“She said she could help me with Gabrielle.”
“Don’t,” Gabriel growled. “Fergus, don’t. One spell could maybe be explained away when it comes time to judge your soul at the end of your life. Especially this spell.” He reached down to stroke his hand over Thorn’s side. The dog shifted, cracking his eyes open and wagging his tail when he recognized Gabriel. “You sacrificed your soul’s purity for the life of your friend. That can be respected and understood. But to ask a demon for help with your love life? That’s harder to put a noble spin on.”
Fergus hunched his shoulders further. “I already said yes.”
“Fergus…” Gabriel breathed the young man’s name out, wing and arm tightening around him as if he could shield him from his mistakes. “Why?”
“Because I had to!” Fergus pushed away from Gabriel, jumping to his feet and pacing agitatedly in front of him. “You’re a god, you don’t understand what it’s like. I’m stuck here, and stuck here, and there’s no one else around for miles and miles, and even if we aren’t meant to be like you always say, she’s still the only girl who even talks to me, and it has to be her.”
Gabriel didn’t understand, but he didn’t think it was because he was a god. Fergus made no sense. If Gabriel slipped into Fergus’ mind, he might find some logic behind what seemed to be incoherent ramblings… but that required Gabriel to slip into Fergus’ mind and violate his privacy. Gabriel refused to enter another’s mind without permission ever since he had ripped Azazel’s to shreds. “Fergus, I-”
“No.” Fergus pointed a trembling finger at Gabriel. “No. I did it because I had to. I know… I know I’m going to go to Hell for it, but I’m okay with that. I really am.”
“Fergus, your mortal mind has no comprehension of what Hell will be like,” Gabriel tried to reason. “My mind barely grasps it!”
“Then I’ll figure it out when I’m there.” Fergus slumped again, shoving his hands into his dark red hair. “I’m doomed anyway, Loki. I might as well live my life to the fullest while I have it.”
“Fergus…”
“It’s what Uncle Brody does,” Fergus pointed out. “Take advantage of everything we have while we have it. Who cares about tomorrow? Today is what counts.”
“Your uncle is hardly a decent role model.”
“He’s all I’ve got. This,” Fergus spread his arms out, “this is all I’ve got. I can’t screw it up.” He scrubbed his hands over his face and sighed. “I need a wife, Loki. I just, I need a wife, and then everything will be better. You’ll see. Everyone will see.”
“A wife won’t fix things,” Gabriel warned, getting back to his feet to face Fergus evenly. The man stared back with tired eyes.
“It’s a start.”
Next...
Notes: This is the third part of the Missing an Angel series. It is recommended that you read the first two before reading this one.
I'm officially declaring this story canon-compliant as of mid-season 9. This second half makes it non-compliant, unfortunately. Damn those Supernatural writers!
Chapter Rating: PG-13
Chapter word count: 1,368
Chapter Summary: Fergus’ life is much more restricted than Cariel’s was and far more restricted than Gabriel’s is.
CHAPTER 9:
All I Have
Gabriel flew around the world twice, wrapping it east to west and north to south. He dove into the ocean, streaking down to the lowest depths and letting the crushing weight of the water sink into his core to make him as miserable outside as he was inside. He emerged from the water at the feet of the cliffs of Canisbay, shaking himself off under the cover of the new moon. The angel raised his hand to snap his fingers and dry his wings but stopped before carrying out the magic. Let them be wet. What did he care?
Grimacing in discomfort, Gabriel folded his waterlogged wings against his back and began the long trek around the cliffs to where the land sloped more gradually to the waves, then up past the little village and over to the cottage he had come to call home.
Fergus was sitting on the ground outside, leaning against the doorpost. His arms were wrapped around drawn-up knees, one hand dangling down to twist fingers through Thorn’s fur. He looked utterly miserable even though Thorn’s chest rose and fell steadily, his tail occasionally giving a little thump against Fergus’ feet. Gabriel could see from here that the dog was whole and healthy again, unblemished from his brush with death.
A thousand options ran through Gabriel’s mind-I see your dog is back. Congratulations, you’re a witch. Was it everything you were hoping for? Happy now?-but he rejected them all. Instead, he simply hooked his thumbs into his belt and came to a stop in front of Fergus, his feet in the exact point the young man was staring at.
Fergus lifted his head slowly, dark eyes trailing up Gabriel’s body until they met his own golden ones. Fergus swallowed, his fingers twitching against Thorn’s fur.
For the longest time, human and angel stayed locked in their stare, neither wanting to be the first to break the silence. Eventually, Thorn spoke for both of them, giving a heavy whuff of breath in his continued sleep. Fergus looked down, breaking the stare. “I did it.”
“I see that.”
Fergus’ shoulders slumped, and he closed his eyes. “You’re mad at me.”
“No, not mad.” Gabriel sighed, rocking onto his toes for a moment before closing the distance between them. He turned to lean against the stone wall of the cottage and slid down until he was seated beside Fergus. “Not at you, at least.”
Fergus glanced at Gabriel, and Gabriel invited him in with a cock of his head and a weak smile. Fergus’ answering smile was just as weak, but he leaned in to rest against Gabriel’s shoulder. “Then who?”
“Myself.” Gabriel slid his arm around Fergus’ shoulders, holding him close, and wrapped them both in his wings. “Your uncle. Your mother. The demon who’s now lending you her powers.”
“Mistress didn’t seem evil,” Fergus murmured. “She came to us like a child, a little girl.”
Gabriel huffed derisively and shook his head. “She does that. Corrupter of the innocent. That little girl was a real little girl, somewhere, and that demon possessed her. It slid into her mind and held her hostage, getting off on her screams as she did horrible things with her body. Probably killed her parents and made the child watch. That’s what she does, Fergus. It’s who she is, how she was created.”
“How would you know? You’ve never met her.”
“Are you sure?” Gabriel arched one eyebrow at Fergus.
“I asked her. She said her path has never crossed with yours.”
“Not like this it hasn’t,” Gabriel agreed. “We’ve met before, several times, but she never knew it was me.” He touched a finger to his lips. “I’m sneaky like that.”
Honestly, Gabriel wasn’t sure if Lilith would recognize him in this form or not. She knew his sword, certainly, but could she see his wings? Could she feel his grace? Gabriel didn’t know, and he didn’t want to find out that she could. He avoided the powerful demons, just in case. Lilith, Azazel, Alastair, Beelzebub, and Abaddon. These were the demons who had survived the war with Heaven, the demons who had undeniable proof of the existence of angels. Lilith, the first demon, ancient and cunning. Azazel and Alastair, the leaders of the fallen fallen, Lucifer’s most trusted servants. Beelzebub and Abaddon, the last two Knights of Hell, the elite anti-angel fighting force created from the double-fallen. Gabriel did not want to attract their attention any more than he wanted that of his brothers.
It was Fergus’ turn to sigh, pressing in closer to Gabriel’s side. He shivered a little beneath Gabriel’s damp wings, and the angel frowned. He stoked his grace, spreading it into his feathers and boiling away the last of the water that still clung to him. Now Fergus settled down, blanketed by Gabriel’s heat. “Is it bad that I liked her?”
“It’s not good,” Gabriel hedged. Demons could be charming when they wanted to be. It was a necessary skill for their survival as a species. Demons needed to be able to lure humans to their side, and while there would always be humans drawn to the demonic, there were far more who were normal people with normal lives needing a little more of a carrot before being ensnared by evil.
“She said she could help me with Gabrielle.”
“Don’t,” Gabriel growled. “Fergus, don’t. One spell could maybe be explained away when it comes time to judge your soul at the end of your life. Especially this spell.” He reached down to stroke his hand over Thorn’s side. The dog shifted, cracking his eyes open and wagging his tail when he recognized Gabriel. “You sacrificed your soul’s purity for the life of your friend. That can be respected and understood. But to ask a demon for help with your love life? That’s harder to put a noble spin on.”
Fergus hunched his shoulders further. “I already said yes.”
“Fergus…” Gabriel breathed the young man’s name out, wing and arm tightening around him as if he could shield him from his mistakes. “Why?”
“Because I had to!” Fergus pushed away from Gabriel, jumping to his feet and pacing agitatedly in front of him. “You’re a god, you don’t understand what it’s like. I’m stuck here, and stuck here, and there’s no one else around for miles and miles, and even if we aren’t meant to be like you always say, she’s still the only girl who even talks to me, and it has to be her.”
Gabriel didn’t understand, but he didn’t think it was because he was a god. Fergus made no sense. If Gabriel slipped into Fergus’ mind, he might find some logic behind what seemed to be incoherent ramblings… but that required Gabriel to slip into Fergus’ mind and violate his privacy. Gabriel refused to enter another’s mind without permission ever since he had ripped Azazel’s to shreds. “Fergus, I-”
“No.” Fergus pointed a trembling finger at Gabriel. “No. I did it because I had to. I know… I know I’m going to go to Hell for it, but I’m okay with that. I really am.”
“Fergus, your mortal mind has no comprehension of what Hell will be like,” Gabriel tried to reason. “My mind barely grasps it!”
“Then I’ll figure it out when I’m there.” Fergus slumped again, shoving his hands into his dark red hair. “I’m doomed anyway, Loki. I might as well live my life to the fullest while I have it.”
“Fergus…”
“It’s what Uncle Brody does,” Fergus pointed out. “Take advantage of everything we have while we have it. Who cares about tomorrow? Today is what counts.”
“Your uncle is hardly a decent role model.”
“He’s all I’ve got. This,” Fergus spread his arms out, “this is all I’ve got. I can’t screw it up.” He scrubbed his hands over his face and sighed. “I need a wife, Loki. I just, I need a wife, and then everything will be better. You’ll see. Everyone will see.”
“A wife won’t fix things,” Gabriel warned, getting back to his feet to face Fergus evenly. The man stared back with tired eyes.
“It’s a start.”
Next...