Fic: Rogue (Gabriel/M, Gabriel/F, PG-13) 21/36
For full notes and other chapters, please see the Masterpost.
Notes: This is the third part of the Missing an Angel series. It is recommended that you read the first two before reading this one.
For those of you who don’t know, Shiva is Kali’s partner, the only one truly able to calm her anger.
The two men who were heckling Gabriel in the last chapter are Rakshasas, or unrighteous spirits. Specifically, they were Hidimba and Kamsa.
Chapter Rating: PG-13
Chapter word count: 2,029
Chapter Summary: Weakened by a Nephilim, Gabriel must put her trust in the most destructive goddess in the Hindu pantheon.
CHAPTER 21:
At Home with the Destroyers
Kali lived in a palatial home tucked into the hills outside Bombay. By the time she and Gabriel arrived there, traveling on foot the entire way, Gabriel’s grace was waning again. She had her arms wrapped around her belly, trying to support the weight of the ravenous child that drained her energy and her good mood. She let herself fall behind Kali, so as not to be tempted to reach for the goddess’ fire again no matter how much her grace ached for it.
Kali’s home was made of painted stone and polished wood, graceful arches and soaring pillars creating a scene that was utterly unlike anything Europe had to offer. Gabriel openly admired the architecture, making a few awestruck noises to earn a little smile from the goddess. This was not the first time she had been to India, but she seldom stayed long enough to appreciate the differences in cultures. Kali and the other Hindi deities had a firm hold on this part of the world, and the angels had always been respectfully avoidant.
“Ah, Kali my love!” A large man strode out from a side room, approaching Kali with his arms out. The goddess turned a long-suffering look toward him, turning one hand palm out and stretching it toward him to keep him at bay.
“No.”
The man chuckled and stepped in anyway, catching Kali in a hug that lifted her off her feet. He swept her in a circle before putting her down again, leaning in to press a kiss to her cheek. Though Kali continued to keep up the disgruntled attitude, there was a secret little smile in the corner of her mouth that showed she really didn’t mind.
Gabriel’s borrowed heart twisted in her chest, and she looked away, studying the intricate tilework of the floor instead of letting her mind go back to Fergus, to Cariel, to her best friend’s smiles and obvious love. He would never catch her in his arms again, never run his fingers through her wings, never greet her with an enthusiastic hug and a kiss against the corner of her lips. His love was lost to her now.
“And who is this?” The man-a god in his own right, Gabriel identified when she looked back at him-was approaching her now, holding out his arms in welcome. Gabriel scrounged up a thready smile, wondering if he was going to attempt to hug her too.
“This is Loki,” Kali introduced, “from the north. Loki, my consort, Shiva.”
Thankfully, Shiva only clapped Gabriel on the shoulders, laughing heartily at Kali’s dry words. “Her consort, she says! Hers!” He laughed again, shaking his head and leaning close to stage-whisper, “Alas, she is absolutely correct. She always is. Remember that well, Loki of the North.”
“I shall keep that foremost in my mind, Lord Shiva.” Gabriel bowed as best she could again, with Shiva right in front of her and her own stomach in the way. Shiva was considered one of the greatest gods in his pantheon, and Gabriel needed his hospitality.
“Are you sure this is Loki?” Shiva asked, releasing one of Gabriel’s shoulders to look back at Kali. “I did believe the King of the Tricksters would be a bit more… kingly. No offense meant,” he was quick to assure Gabriel. “You’re very lovely and queenly, but…”
“Difficult cycle,” Kali explained, and understanding swept across Shiva’s face.
“Ah, I see. Mortals and their peculiarities.”
“They do like giving me children,” Gabriel agreed with another weak smile. “Lord Shiva, Kali has graciously offered me a place to stay-”
“Then you have it!” Shiva clasped Gabriel’s shoulders again before releasing her to return to Kali. “This is Kali’s home, after all, not mine at all. I was actually about to leave.”
“Oh?” Kali allowed Shiva to curl his arm around her waist and pull him close. Gabriel clenched her jaw against more forbidden thoughts of Cariel and Fergus. She would never move past this grief if she kept letting such memories resurface!
“Ganesh wishes to travel. I thought I’d take him to the Far East. Ma Gu has been asking after me. I think she’d like to meet my son.”
“You don’t want to be here,” Kali interpreted.
Shiva sighed, taking Kali’s hands in his (an impressive feat, Gabriel noted, what with how many of them they both actually had). “You know I love you, Kali, but-”
“You need your space.”
“You’re starting a difficult cycle of your own,” Shiva pointed out. “I’d rather not… be in your way.”
“Good.” Kali actually smiled faintly at Shiva, turning to brush her lips over his cheek. “You are learning your place. Go. Have your fun with Ma Gu. I’m sure Loki will keep me suitably entertained.”
“At the very least, she can help you out.”
“I will help her,” Kali retorted, her face impassive again.
“Of course,” Shiva laughed. “Of course you will!” He gave her one more kiss before looking back to Gabriel. “You’ll be in good hands here, Loki. If anyone can help you through this cycle, it will be my Kali.”
Gabriel gave another smile and bow, and then Shiva was gone, off to the Far East, presumably.
“This way,” Kali instructed, starting down the long, arched corridors again. “I will show you your room.”
Gabriel hurried to catch up, hating how she had to waddle more than walk now. She paid close attention to every turn they took, to make sure she wouldn’t be lost in Kali’s maze of a home. “If I may ask,” she began, “what cycle are you starting?”
Kali snorted derisively. “Some foolish worshippers of mine think me maternal. They are encouraging me to be a motherly goddess.”
“Oh.” Gabriel studied Kali for a moment, then looked down at her belly.
“Exactly,” Kali grumbled. “As long as they’re insisting, I might as well indulge them. I will be properly motherly towards you and your offspring, but,” the goddess turned sharply, poking a sharp-nailed finger against Gabriel’s belly, “it will not become a deity in my pantheon. Is that clear?”
“It won’t be a deity in any pantheon,” Gabriel admitted. “Few of my children actually are, but this one…” She shrugged. “Demigod at best.” Nephilim.
“I see.” Kali scrutinized Gabriel for another minute before turning around again and continuing down the hall. “You will keep your hands off the local virgins while you’re here. And the non-virgins, while you’re at it. This is not your place. If I find you’ve been messing with my people, I will make you regret it.”
Will you set me on fire? Gabriel bit back the request, simply nodding her understanding. “The, ah, others in your pantheon?”
“Like Shiva, they follow my example. If I say you are welcome here, you are welcome here.” Kali stopped and pushed a door open. “This will be your room. Someone will fetch you for meals, if you wish to eat.”
Gabriel didn’t bother explaining that she didn’t need to eat-most gods didn’t. Tricksters were actually a rare exception, but with an angel inside, Loki didn’t actually need sweets the way he ordinarily did. Gabriel ate to keep up appearances, but she hadn’t been bothering these past few months. Food held no interest for her. “Thank you.”
Kali had swept off down the hall before Gabriel had even entered her room. She was surprised at how empty it actually was. There was a stone cot tucked against one wall, a cupboard against another, and a low table against a third. The fourth wall opened onto a small balcony. The walls were completely painted with intricate murals, and the tile floor was liberally covered with woven rugs and soft bolsters, but there was nothing else in the room.
There wasn’t a fireplace.
Gabriel winced at the realization, pressing the heel of her palm against her forehead. A throbbing headache was starting to build, a sure sign that the Nephilim wasn’t happy. For something not even fully grown, it certainly was demanding.
Hours later, Kali found Gabriel curled into a corner of the balcony. Her wings were stretched out and hanging limply over the railing, but everything else was curled around the agonizing ache in her womb. She cracked her eyes open when she heard Kali approach, but she couldn’t even find it in her to force a smile over her face for the goddess. The sun and the steadiness of the ground beneath her had helped some, but the Nephilim was still raging inside her, taking out its anger on her grace. As quickly as she absorbed energy from the distant star, the Nephilim devoured it.
“You did not answer the noon summons,” Kali said, one set of arms folded, another planted firmly on her hips. Gabriel just let her eyes slide shut again. She hadn’t even heard a summons.
If Raphael found her now, he’d probably spare her life just to prolong her suffering.
Something almost like concern had crept into the edges of Kali’s voice when she spoke again, softening her words. “You aren’t well.” She knelt beside Gabriel, and one of her hands touched Gabriel’s forehead.
Grace immediately latched on to the goddess, and Gabriel groaned in relief as the Nephilim accepted this new source of energy. Kali’s power flooded her grace faster than the baby could eat it, and Gabriel slowly began to stir.
“Why do you react so strongly to my touch?” Kali demanded, though she didn’t pull away. She was offering, Gabriel realized. Being maternal.
Gabriel licked her lips and coughed, clearing her throat. “Fire,” she finally answered the goddess. “I… have roots in fire, in my early days.”
Loki didn’t. There was a giant named Logi who was associated with fire, and the similarity of the names and complete lack of any genuine history for Loki had led to a lot of confusion (Gabriel was quite proud of that particular knot of knowledge), but truthfully, Loki didn’t have any connection with fire or flames of any kind. Kali had no way of knowing that, though, unless she had been unusually invested in the early days of a distant pantheon.
“Your fire is weak,” Kali surmised. “You need mine.”
“This,” abomination, “child drains me,” Gabriel confessed, lifting a hand and letting it fall limp over her belly. “I think it wants to kill me.”
“Hmm…” With a jangle of bracelets, Kali placed another hand on Gabriel’s belly, eliciting another groan from the angel. With two points of contact now, the energy was flooding in at twice the rate as before. Gabriel was soon able to sit up, opening her eyes fully and watching the goddess in front of her. Kali’s eyes were glittering as she prodded the Nephilim’s soul. Gabriel held her breath, wondering if Kali would see through the lies and realize the infant within was nothing like a god at all, but the child of an angel.
“When did you last eat?” Kali finally asked, looking up at Gabriel. “You missed lunch.”
Gabriel shook her head. “I haven’t… not since it…”
“You’re an idiot,” Kali intoned, pulling both her hands away and making Gabriel whine in protest. “You’re a Trickster. You need to keep yourself energized.”
Don’t, Gabriel thought petulantly.
“And the child is demi,” Kali continued, unaware of Gabriel’s thoughts. “Half Trickster, half human. Both sides need to eat.”
Oh.
That… made a lot of sense, Gabriel realized. She could keep Loki alive with her grace, but the Nephilim was graceless. It had no way of sustaining its human side. Without food, it drew from the only thing it had access to, Gabriel’s grace. Not only was a powerful creature trying to create itself inside her, but Gabriel had also put herself in a very grace-weakening state for six months. Even her massive amount of grace had a limit, and the Nephilim had found it.
“I’ve been starving it.”
Kali huffed, holding out two hands to help Gabriel to her feet. “Some fertility goddess you’re turning out to be,” she scolded. Was that a gentleness in her eye? “Come along, Loki. You need to be eating for two now.”
Next...
Notes: This is the third part of the Missing an Angel series. It is recommended that you read the first two before reading this one.
For those of you who don’t know, Shiva is Kali’s partner, the only one truly able to calm her anger.
The two men who were heckling Gabriel in the last chapter are Rakshasas, or unrighteous spirits. Specifically, they were Hidimba and Kamsa.
Chapter Rating: PG-13
Chapter word count: 2,029
Chapter Summary: Weakened by a Nephilim, Gabriel must put her trust in the most destructive goddess in the Hindu pantheon.
CHAPTER 21:
At Home with the Destroyers
Kali lived in a palatial home tucked into the hills outside Bombay. By the time she and Gabriel arrived there, traveling on foot the entire way, Gabriel’s grace was waning again. She had her arms wrapped around her belly, trying to support the weight of the ravenous child that drained her energy and her good mood. She let herself fall behind Kali, so as not to be tempted to reach for the goddess’ fire again no matter how much her grace ached for it.
Kali’s home was made of painted stone and polished wood, graceful arches and soaring pillars creating a scene that was utterly unlike anything Europe had to offer. Gabriel openly admired the architecture, making a few awestruck noises to earn a little smile from the goddess. This was not the first time she had been to India, but she seldom stayed long enough to appreciate the differences in cultures. Kali and the other Hindi deities had a firm hold on this part of the world, and the angels had always been respectfully avoidant.
“Ah, Kali my love!” A large man strode out from a side room, approaching Kali with his arms out. The goddess turned a long-suffering look toward him, turning one hand palm out and stretching it toward him to keep him at bay.
“No.”
The man chuckled and stepped in anyway, catching Kali in a hug that lifted her off her feet. He swept her in a circle before putting her down again, leaning in to press a kiss to her cheek. Though Kali continued to keep up the disgruntled attitude, there was a secret little smile in the corner of her mouth that showed she really didn’t mind.
Gabriel’s borrowed heart twisted in her chest, and she looked away, studying the intricate tilework of the floor instead of letting her mind go back to Fergus, to Cariel, to her best friend’s smiles and obvious love. He would never catch her in his arms again, never run his fingers through her wings, never greet her with an enthusiastic hug and a kiss against the corner of her lips. His love was lost to her now.
“And who is this?” The man-a god in his own right, Gabriel identified when she looked back at him-was approaching her now, holding out his arms in welcome. Gabriel scrounged up a thready smile, wondering if he was going to attempt to hug her too.
“This is Loki,” Kali introduced, “from the north. Loki, my consort, Shiva.”
Thankfully, Shiva only clapped Gabriel on the shoulders, laughing heartily at Kali’s dry words. “Her consort, she says! Hers!” He laughed again, shaking his head and leaning close to stage-whisper, “Alas, she is absolutely correct. She always is. Remember that well, Loki of the North.”
“I shall keep that foremost in my mind, Lord Shiva.” Gabriel bowed as best she could again, with Shiva right in front of her and her own stomach in the way. Shiva was considered one of the greatest gods in his pantheon, and Gabriel needed his hospitality.
“Are you sure this is Loki?” Shiva asked, releasing one of Gabriel’s shoulders to look back at Kali. “I did believe the King of the Tricksters would be a bit more… kingly. No offense meant,” he was quick to assure Gabriel. “You’re very lovely and queenly, but…”
“Difficult cycle,” Kali explained, and understanding swept across Shiva’s face.
“Ah, I see. Mortals and their peculiarities.”
“They do like giving me children,” Gabriel agreed with another weak smile. “Lord Shiva, Kali has graciously offered me a place to stay-”
“Then you have it!” Shiva clasped Gabriel’s shoulders again before releasing her to return to Kali. “This is Kali’s home, after all, not mine at all. I was actually about to leave.”
“Oh?” Kali allowed Shiva to curl his arm around her waist and pull him close. Gabriel clenched her jaw against more forbidden thoughts of Cariel and Fergus. She would never move past this grief if she kept letting such memories resurface!
“Ganesh wishes to travel. I thought I’d take him to the Far East. Ma Gu has been asking after me. I think she’d like to meet my son.”
“You don’t want to be here,” Kali interpreted.
Shiva sighed, taking Kali’s hands in his (an impressive feat, Gabriel noted, what with how many of them they both actually had). “You know I love you, Kali, but-”
“You need your space.”
“You’re starting a difficult cycle of your own,” Shiva pointed out. “I’d rather not… be in your way.”
“Good.” Kali actually smiled faintly at Shiva, turning to brush her lips over his cheek. “You are learning your place. Go. Have your fun with Ma Gu. I’m sure Loki will keep me suitably entertained.”
“At the very least, she can help you out.”
“I will help her,” Kali retorted, her face impassive again.
“Of course,” Shiva laughed. “Of course you will!” He gave her one more kiss before looking back to Gabriel. “You’ll be in good hands here, Loki. If anyone can help you through this cycle, it will be my Kali.”
Gabriel gave another smile and bow, and then Shiva was gone, off to the Far East, presumably.
“This way,” Kali instructed, starting down the long, arched corridors again. “I will show you your room.”
Gabriel hurried to catch up, hating how she had to waddle more than walk now. She paid close attention to every turn they took, to make sure she wouldn’t be lost in Kali’s maze of a home. “If I may ask,” she began, “what cycle are you starting?”
Kali snorted derisively. “Some foolish worshippers of mine think me maternal. They are encouraging me to be a motherly goddess.”
“Oh.” Gabriel studied Kali for a moment, then looked down at her belly.
“Exactly,” Kali grumbled. “As long as they’re insisting, I might as well indulge them. I will be properly motherly towards you and your offspring, but,” the goddess turned sharply, poking a sharp-nailed finger against Gabriel’s belly, “it will not become a deity in my pantheon. Is that clear?”
“It won’t be a deity in any pantheon,” Gabriel admitted. “Few of my children actually are, but this one…” She shrugged. “Demigod at best.” Nephilim.
“I see.” Kali scrutinized Gabriel for another minute before turning around again and continuing down the hall. “You will keep your hands off the local virgins while you’re here. And the non-virgins, while you’re at it. This is not your place. If I find you’ve been messing with my people, I will make you regret it.”
Will you set me on fire? Gabriel bit back the request, simply nodding her understanding. “The, ah, others in your pantheon?”
“Like Shiva, they follow my example. If I say you are welcome here, you are welcome here.” Kali stopped and pushed a door open. “This will be your room. Someone will fetch you for meals, if you wish to eat.”
Gabriel didn’t bother explaining that she didn’t need to eat-most gods didn’t. Tricksters were actually a rare exception, but with an angel inside, Loki didn’t actually need sweets the way he ordinarily did. Gabriel ate to keep up appearances, but she hadn’t been bothering these past few months. Food held no interest for her. “Thank you.”
Kali had swept off down the hall before Gabriel had even entered her room. She was surprised at how empty it actually was. There was a stone cot tucked against one wall, a cupboard against another, and a low table against a third. The fourth wall opened onto a small balcony. The walls were completely painted with intricate murals, and the tile floor was liberally covered with woven rugs and soft bolsters, but there was nothing else in the room.
There wasn’t a fireplace.
Gabriel winced at the realization, pressing the heel of her palm against her forehead. A throbbing headache was starting to build, a sure sign that the Nephilim wasn’t happy. For something not even fully grown, it certainly was demanding.
Hours later, Kali found Gabriel curled into a corner of the balcony. Her wings were stretched out and hanging limply over the railing, but everything else was curled around the agonizing ache in her womb. She cracked her eyes open when she heard Kali approach, but she couldn’t even find it in her to force a smile over her face for the goddess. The sun and the steadiness of the ground beneath her had helped some, but the Nephilim was still raging inside her, taking out its anger on her grace. As quickly as she absorbed energy from the distant star, the Nephilim devoured it.
“You did not answer the noon summons,” Kali said, one set of arms folded, another planted firmly on her hips. Gabriel just let her eyes slide shut again. She hadn’t even heard a summons.
If Raphael found her now, he’d probably spare her life just to prolong her suffering.
Something almost like concern had crept into the edges of Kali’s voice when she spoke again, softening her words. “You aren’t well.” She knelt beside Gabriel, and one of her hands touched Gabriel’s forehead.
Grace immediately latched on to the goddess, and Gabriel groaned in relief as the Nephilim accepted this new source of energy. Kali’s power flooded her grace faster than the baby could eat it, and Gabriel slowly began to stir.
“Why do you react so strongly to my touch?” Kali demanded, though she didn’t pull away. She was offering, Gabriel realized. Being maternal.
Gabriel licked her lips and coughed, clearing her throat. “Fire,” she finally answered the goddess. “I… have roots in fire, in my early days.”
Loki didn’t. There was a giant named Logi who was associated with fire, and the similarity of the names and complete lack of any genuine history for Loki had led to a lot of confusion (Gabriel was quite proud of that particular knot of knowledge), but truthfully, Loki didn’t have any connection with fire or flames of any kind. Kali had no way of knowing that, though, unless she had been unusually invested in the early days of a distant pantheon.
“Your fire is weak,” Kali surmised. “You need mine.”
“This,” abomination, “child drains me,” Gabriel confessed, lifting a hand and letting it fall limp over her belly. “I think it wants to kill me.”
“Hmm…” With a jangle of bracelets, Kali placed another hand on Gabriel’s belly, eliciting another groan from the angel. With two points of contact now, the energy was flooding in at twice the rate as before. Gabriel was soon able to sit up, opening her eyes fully and watching the goddess in front of her. Kali’s eyes were glittering as she prodded the Nephilim’s soul. Gabriel held her breath, wondering if Kali would see through the lies and realize the infant within was nothing like a god at all, but the child of an angel.
“When did you last eat?” Kali finally asked, looking up at Gabriel. “You missed lunch.”
Gabriel shook her head. “I haven’t… not since it…”
“You’re an idiot,” Kali intoned, pulling both her hands away and making Gabriel whine in protest. “You’re a Trickster. You need to keep yourself energized.”
Don’t, Gabriel thought petulantly.
“And the child is demi,” Kali continued, unaware of Gabriel’s thoughts. “Half Trickster, half human. Both sides need to eat.”
Oh.
That… made a lot of sense, Gabriel realized. She could keep Loki alive with her grace, but the Nephilim was graceless. It had no way of sustaining its human side. Without food, it drew from the only thing it had access to, Gabriel’s grace. Not only was a powerful creature trying to create itself inside her, but Gabriel had also put herself in a very grace-weakening state for six months. Even her massive amount of grace had a limit, and the Nephilim had found it.
“I’ve been starving it.”
Kali huffed, holding out two hands to help Gabriel to her feet. “Some fertility goddess you’re turning out to be,” she scolded. Was that a gentleness in her eye? “Come along, Loki. You need to be eating for two now.”
Next...