The Play Nice Proviso: Ten
Though I’m barely touching you, I’ve shivers down my spine
The last month or so of filming the fourth season was hectic and exhausting, and damn near flew by so fast, it gave him whiplash. He and Jensen were being pushed above and beyond their limits but it was good. It was worth it. He enjoyed every moment of it.
Although, that may have been because every moment was spent with Jensen.
Jensen; who, although he refused to tell Jared what had been bothering him, seemed good and happy and genuinely enjoying everything they did together, whether it was work or play. Jensen; who seemed whole again, and not quite so broken. Jared decided to let sleeping dogs lie; they had only so much time to spend together before the hiatus would take them their separate ways and he wanted, no, needed, to make the most of every minute they had together. And about the hiatus, while he knew why he wasn’t too keen on taking on a movie role or working over the summer - it would take away from the time he could be spending with Jensen, never mind that it would take him away, period - he didn’t know why Jen had chosen to stay idle.
Although he kind of hoped it was for the same reason.
Because while Jensen before was amazing and adorable and his best friend and his one true love (and yes, he was quite aware that his inner teenage girl had been well and truly resurrected, thankyouverymuch), Jensen now was, well, still all of the above, just more... more everything.
Jared felt bewitched and bedazzled, absolutely spellbound, caught up in every aspect of Jen’s life, because Jensen now allowed it. If he had been holding himself back before, now he was inclusive, laying himself bare almost, showing and sharing with Jared all his strengths, his weaknesses, snippets of his past, hopes for his future - everything. And if Jared had felt privileged to get those scattered bits and pieces of information before, now he felt amazingly blessed.
So he shared of himself too. The bond between them became incredible. Jared had never felt this way about someone before, and it unnerved him as much as it thrilled him. And then there was the way their relationship was slowly morphing from friendship to something more, where suddenly casual touches meant something... not so casual.
And therein lay the best part of all this: Jensen now, was touchy-feely.
Sure, Jared admitted, Jensen had always been more physically communicative with Jared than with anyone else in his circle of friends, even right in the beginning when touchy-feely had translated into kicking his ass with his ninja moves. Now though, he was so completely relaxed and at ease, especially at home, that all the touching was starting to distract Jared... sexually.
Just the thought made Jared blush like a fool. He was not a teenager with his first crush, he was a man; he should not be reduced to a blubbering idiot by Jensen Ackles. Except that was exactly what happened. Jensen brushing by him sent his pulse racing. Jensen falling asleep with his head on Jared’s shoulder as they watched TV made his insides turn to mush. Jensen ruffling his hair, squeezing his shoulder, patting his knee, rubbing his back; such cursory touches but they sent shivers down his spine every single time. And Jared loved it. He craved it.
All those feelings were magnified and put out there for everyone to see, as long as they were looking. And their fans looked. Hell, their fans had been looking since Day One, and Jared had to hand it to them: they had called it. Their now notorious chemistry was proven yet again at the Los Angeles convention they attended a week before shooting wrapped. And if he thought their back-and-forth banter before had been heady fun - and hell, he deserved some sort of award for not jumping Jensen (a very sexy, relaxed, funny and just-fucking-on Jensen) on stage - now, it was epic.
And Jared was savoring every second of it.
They had gotten back from the convention in LA tired but happy, and they fell right back into their grueling filming schedule for the last week before hiatus. Eric sure knew how to order them about from across the miles in LA. Still, things were good on set. Relaxed.
Then they got home.
And relaxation went right out the window for Jared.
He was so torn between this idea of them in his head - happy and together and in love - versus the reality of them, that sometimes he got a little confused.
Case in point: coming home from a solo Loblaws run one night when he had been filming later than Jensen. Hands laden with a grocery bag and his spur-of-the-moment purchase of two fold-out hammocks, he had rung the doorbell instead of trying to find his keys while balancing the hammock boxes.
“Hey, Jay. Whoa, what’s this?” Jensen asked with a laugh.
“Hey babe, wait and see, you’re gonna love ‘em!”
What happened next happened so naturally that neither of them gave it a second thought: Jared just leaned down to press a quick kiss to Jensen’s mouth as he readjusted his hold on the boxes while Jensen grabbed the grocery bag from him and tried to keep the dogs indoors.
They were actually already halfway to the kitchen before they both froze in place, turning almost identical horrified glances at each other, the narrow hallway suddenly seeming very close, only the boxes Jared still valiantly hugged to his chest really keeping them apart.
“Did you just...?”
“Oh my God!”
Jensen blushed a fire-engine red, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat, mouth working but no words issuing forth. Jared felt a stab of icy fear in his chest. God almighty, would Jensen knock him into next week for that?
“Sorry, Jen,” he started, his voice clearly conveying the panic rising in his chest. “I didn’t mean... that just happened... Oh God! Please don’t hate me,” he groaned, squeezing his eyes shut in despair. They sprang open again when he felt Jensen’s warm hand cup his cheek.
“It’s cool,” Jensen smiled a little shyly, his face fading to pink. “Come on into the kitchen before you drop those,” he said softly, that hand moving down to squeeze his shoulder before trailing down his arm, leaving goosebumps in its wake. Jared meekly followed him into the kitchen, probably for the first time in his life, rendered completely speechless.
Jensen put the grocery bag on the island counter and sighed when he looked over to see that Jared had yet to put the boxes down. Jared watched him walk over and take them from him, putting them on the floor before turning them to see the picture on the box.
“Fold-out hammocks?” He asked. Jared nodded. “One for each of us?” Another nod. “That’s awesome, Jay. They look comfy.” And apparently nodding was the only thing Jared was capable of at that moment.
Jensen sighed again and walked over to him, his hands coming to rest on either side of Jared’s neck as he pulled him down a couple of inches to his height. “Jay, it’s no biggie, man. Chill. It’s just you and me,” Jensen quietly reassured him. “What’s one little kiss or two between us?”
“Two?” Jared asked stupidly, finding his voice again. He may have been rendered mute but there was nothing wrong with his memory. There had only been one little kiss.
“Two.”
And with that, Jensen tilted his head up and softly kissed him.
As the first day of the hiatus, the day they were due to leave (on the same flight to LAX, where they would then catch different flights home), drew near, Jared felt himself get more and more restless.
Especially after those two tiny little kisses that neither of them talked about.
And how he wanted this thing between them to be put into words, to be recognized for what it was. He wasn’t afraid of the words or the labels anymore; he wasn’t afraid of losing Jensen if he came out and... came out. Losing Jensen was not an option. He wasn’t sure if his feelings for Jensen meant he was gay, because he certainly didn’t feel this way about any other men, but he was sure they meant he was in love. That was all that mattered to him.
He had been biding his time, waiting for filming to wrap. He didn’t want any distractions. He also wanted to give Jensen, and himself, time with their families. But the words had to be said, they needed to be said. And since they both had plans to meet up three weeks into the summer break, Jared felt like that would be the right time to say them. But those three weeks stretched out like an eternity. Surely he wasn’t that needy, was he? He was going to see his family after all, who he hadn’t seen in ages; he loved hanging out with them and was looking forward to it. But without Jensen there to share the fun with him, he felt it wouldn’t be... complete.
He wouldn’t be complete.
He stopped himself from channeling Tom Cruise’s Jerry Maguire in his head just in time for Jensen to hand him a cup of Starbuck’s Caramel Macchiato - his favorite, with whipped cream and not foam, which Jensen never forgot - which he gratefully accepted, while manfully resisting the urge to yank Jensen down onto his lap and snuggle him close. Their flights from LAX were due to leave soon and they were killing the layover time together in the middle of the terminal before they would head off in opposite directions to their gates.
Jensen’s bare forearm - his very sexy, bare forearm (and yes, Jared was that far gone), kept brushing against Jared’s every time Jensen took a sip of his steaming Americano. And then Jensen lightly grazed his knuckles against the back of Jared’s hand. It was intentional, affectionate and so damn sweet that Jared had to firmly tamp down on the need to pull Jensen to him and kiss him senseless.
Because, these days kissing Jensen, really kissing him - full on the mouth, teeth crashing, tongues dueling, spit swapping - was all he could think about. Well, he could think of more than just kissing, or kissing involving body parts other than Jensen’s gorgeous mouth, but for the sake of his sanity, he kept a tight rein on those thoughts.
“So, three weeks, huh?” Jensen asked him, thankfully giving him something else to think about.
“Yeah,” he answered, his voice a bit gruffer than usual. He cleared his throat and took a sip of his coffee. “Twenty-one Days of my Life,” he smirked, suddenly remembering their teasing banter from the LA Con.
Jensen shot him a sly smile, as he feinted getting up. “Oh look, my flight’s leaving in a New York Minute.”
Jared laughed and grabbed his wrist. “Don’t even think about leaving yet; we got a good half hour before you need to board your flight.”
“You guys are driving up, right?” He asked, his eyes steady on Jared’s grip on his hand. Jared risked a light caress over Jen’s pulse with his thumb, and he leaned closer so that their shoulders brushed.
“Yeah. Oh, and last night Momma told me that she and Daddy are probably gonna tag along too. That reminds me, I need to book them a hotel.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Jay,” Jensen looked at him with a frown. “Y’all are gonna stay with us, we have plenty of room.”
“Jen...”
“I don’t wanna hear it. Y’all are family.” And yeah, so Jared fell a little more in love with him hearing those words. He smirked at him fondly, and Jensen smiled back. Jared resisted the urge to sigh happily at the sight. He was such a freakin’ dumbass, Jen would never let him live it down if he ever found out.
Just then the display screen in front of them announced that their flights, which were leaving within fifteen minutes of each other, were boarding. They had a little more time, so they slowly savored their drinks and those last few minutes together, absently watching the steady flow of people around them. But eventually they had to stand and face each other and say goodbye, for the time-being.
They hugged hard, bodies pressed tightly together, and maybe for a little longer than was appropriate for friends, but they were so far beyond that now, it didn’t matter.
“You know the deal, Jen. Call me as soon as you land,” Jared whispered, his lips brushing the shell of Jensen’s ear.
“Yeah, that goes for you too.” Jensen sounded a little hoarse, and his fingers momentarily tightened their grip in the hair at Jared’s nape.
Jared, too, felt his throat tightening in response. Stupid girly emotions got the better of him every time. “Goddamn, Jared, miss you already.”
Jared fought back the tears and the urge to rip up his ticket and get one to Dallas instead. “Three weeks. I’ll see you in three weeks.” And with that, he kissed Jensen surreptitiously on the temple and walked away without looking back.
There would be texts and calls all summer. He was going to Richardson for a week or two. A couple of weeks after that, Jensen had plans to come to San Antonio for a week or two. It wouldn’t be as bad as the previous summer had been. He could get through this; it wasn’t like it was the end of the world.
Except... try telling that to his heart.
Jensen stood on Jared’s doorstep, feeling a bit like an idiot. Okay, a lot like an idiot. But that had been par for the course since he first met Jared, so he needed to get used to the feeling.
No time like the present, right?
It had only been three days since they left Vancouver; what had made him think that he could go any longer without seeing Jared, he would never know. This had never happened to him before; this incessant longing for another person was something so foreign, so alien, but he needed Jared, he reckoned, more than he needed sustenance or sleep.
So the insomnia and loss of appetite since leaving Vancouver, in spite of being surrounded by his Momma’s cooking and his Daddy’s desserts, and a very, very comfortable bed, had not been surprising.
“Umm… are we standing out here all day, or are you actually gonna ring the doorbell any time soon?” Josh asked from behind him. Jensen noted the quizzical looks on his family’s faces, refused to comment, and instead took a deep breath and rang the doorbell.
The door was thrown open a minute later by Jared’s mother; Jensen recognized her from pictures.
“Hi, Mrs. Padalecki,” he greeted, swallowing hard, a stupid, stupid blush rising in his cheeks.
“Oh, my Lord Almighty, Jensen Ackles!” She pulled him in for a big hug, doing an excellent job of squishing him to within an inch of his life. So now at least he knew where Jared got his hugging genes from. “Call me Sherri, baby. Is this the entire Ackles family? Jared never said anything about y’all coming!” She waved them all inside and they were soon joined in the spacious foyer by Jared’s dad and siblings.
“He didn’t know,” Jensen explained sheepishly. “We decided to go on a little Texan road trip and I thought we should drop by real quick since we were spending the next couple of days in San Antonio.”
“Well then, welcome, son. I’m Gerry,” Jared’s father also enveloped Jensen in a huge hug. So it was a family proclivity then, Jensen thought with a small smirk.
He made the introductions and really, the Padaleckis were marathon huggers, but his effort was half-hearted. Where was Jared?
“He’s having a shower,” Megan supplied, as if reading his mind. “He was playing with the dogs and...”
“Sweaty. ‘Nuff said.”
“He sweats so much.”
“I know. Believe me, I know,” Jensen returned her cheeky grin. Megan blinked up at him, looking oddly dazed.
“Lordy, you are so much hotter in person! Jesus.” Megan exclaimed with her hand to her chest. Thankfully, Jensen was saved from commenting by Sadie and Harley tromping into the room, barking in excitement. They made a bee-line for him, Harley planting his paws on his chest while Sadie lovingly tried to creep between his legs. He laughed, loud and spontaneous, squatting so that these members of the Padalecki brood could hug him too.
A sound like thunder came from the upstairs landing and suddenly, Jared stood at the top of the stairs, looking right down at Jensen. They remained frozen for a split second, but then, in the time it took Jensen to straighten up, Jared was in front of him. Finally, close enough to touch.
To kiss.
Jensen caught his breath at the sight of him; the dimples, the floppy hair dripping wet onto his t-shirt, those brilliant hazel eyes shot through with green and flecks of blue, and that smile as big as Texas.
“I booked a ticket to Dallas for tomorrow. I was coming to spend the weekend,” Jared told him with a grin as sheepish as Jensen’s had been.
“Can you get a refund?” Jensen asked with a small, very happy smile.
“No, but I can exchange it.”
“That’ll work.”
They stared at each other for a split second longer, stupid grins mirrored on each other’s faces, before Jared laughed and grabbed the front of Jensen’s button-down shirt and dragged him into a hug, wrapping his whole self around Jensen’s body.
And Jensen, three whole days after arriving in Texas, was finally... home.
“God, I missed you,” Jared whispered in his ear, his big hand cradling the back of Jensen’s head.
“I missed you too,” Jensen whispered right back, pressing the tiniest of kisses to the side of Jared’s neck. Jared shivered and tightened his grip - painfully. “Ow!”
“What?” Jared’s face was the epitome of concern as he immediately released him.
“My back, remember?”
“Jesus, still? Jen! Did you take your meds? Lemme see!”
“It’s fine, and yes, I took the meds. Jared!” Jensen slapped his wandering hands away before Jared could lift up his shirt and take a look-see for himself.
“I didn’t even hug you all that hard! That means you’re really hurting.”
“Hurting?” Jensen’s mother piped up, and it was a good thing she spoke, because he had kind of forgotten their families were there. Watching them. Christ.
“Mama Ackles,” Jared greeted her with a big frown. “He didn’t tell you he was hurtin’?”
“No,” she leveled a hard look at Jensen. “He did not mention that.”
“Yeah, it was all my fault. Fight scene, so many takes and I had to throw him hard into this iron gate each time. He was black and blue and the doctor said he had a couple of bruised ribs,” Jared ratted on him to his mother, who looked increasingly alarmed. “I’m sorry,” he finished, utterly contrite, and hugged Jensen’s mother. And then, for good measure, he hugged the rest of Ackles brood, giving Mack an extra kiss on the crown of her head.
She may or may not have swooned.
Jensen rolled his eyes at that, conveniently ignoring the fact that Jared had the exact same effect on him. “Sam did it to Dean, you didn’t do it to me. I’m fine. Or I will be in a day or two.”
“Then you shouldn’t have a problem letting me see,” Jared argued as they were ushered en masse into the massive kitchen cum breakfast room at the back of the house. A large jug of icy sweet tea was passed around, glasses filling, clinking together, Harley and Sadie weaving between their legs before loping out to the back yard. Jared crossed his arms over his chest and stared down at Jensen. It was a really sexy stance, and the sight made his pulse leap.
“Nothing to see, Jay,” Jensen said, trying to physically contain the blush from rising up his cheeks. It was, of course, an exercise in futility.
“All right,” Jared agreed too readily. Jensen really should have seen it coming, but suddenly those big hands were spanning his lower back, Jared’s thumbs unerringly finding the exact spot where his ribs were bruised. Jensen let out an involuntary - and quite unmanly - yelp. “I knew it! Stand still, Jennybean, I don’t want to hurt you, I just want to see.” And before he could even open his mouth to protest, Jared had lifted his shirt in the back gently, so gently that the shift of the soft cloth on his skin and Jared’s breath on the back of his neck caused him to shiver. Jared’s sharp, shocked intake of breath made Jensen wince.
“Jensen Ross!” His mother exclaimed. “My gosh, that looks awful!”
“Jeff, call Harry Patterson over. Goodness, Jensen,” Sherri admonished. Apparently, having Sherri Padalecki around was going to be like having his mom squared. He grinned at the thought.
“Did you just let him call you Jennybean?” Josh piped up from somewhere, his tone and the look on his face quite incredulous. Jensen ignored him.
“It’s not as bad as it looks,” Jensen tried to argue as Jeff disappeared and the rest of them crowded around him muttering commiserations.
He let Jared stroke his back and gratefully accepted a tall glass of sweet tea from Gerry, nodding his thanks with a tired smile. In actuality, his back was killing him and right now, Jared’s hands on him were the only comfort he needed, he thought as Jared pulled him back into his massive chest and hugged him close, his big hand now rubbing Jensen’s chest.
He sighed happily and closed his eyes. He was with Jared. Life was good.
“It appears I have a potential patient,” someone called from the kitchen doorway. “Harry Patterson, next-door-neighbor, Padalecki-family-physician, and all-round-good-guy,” he introduced himself to everyone with a grin. Jensen returned it while Jared made general introductions and filled the doctor in on the details of Jensen’s injury.
“How sore are you, son?”
“Pretty sore.”
“I don’t think the five hour drive down from Richardson helped much,” Mack added her two cents.
“Can’t imagine how it would. I’ma need you to take your shirt off, Jensen.”
“Yes!” Megan grinned and pumped her fist in the air. Jensen blushed - because sometime during his relationship with Jared, he had apparently become a big fucking girl - but then he laughingly waggled his eyebrows at her.
“Need a hand?” she asked cheekily.
“Nah, I think I got it, jailbait.”
“Eww,” Mack grimaced at Megan.
“What?” Megan challenged with a smirk. “I don’t think you’d be complaining if it was Jared.”
“True dat.” They fist-pumped each other.
“Great. The forces of evil are uniting,” Jensen deadpanned and everyone laughed. Jensen unbuttoned his shirt, but when he moved to take it off, the soreness in his back escalated into outright pain. “Je-sus!”
In a second, Jared was there, right behind him, lowering his arms to fall lightly by his side. “Here, let me,” he said quietly, and Jensen realized how worried he really was. Jared very carefully eased the shirt off him as Harry came to stand in front of him. Jensen turned to face Jared so the doctor could have a look at his back.
“Hoo-wee, that’s purr-ty,” Harry whistled low, the sound almost drowned by the shocked gasps from the others. “Lean forward towards JT a bit - brace yourself on him - let me get a better look. The bruising’s spread up your back, son. Tell me if it hurts,” he asked as he pressed down along Jensen’s back. “JT mentioned you’ve had x-rays done?”
“He insisted on it before we left Vancouver,” he hissed in pain as the doctor pressed a sore spot. “Damn fool hid my passport.”
“He was always a resourceful kid,” Sherri supplied, exchanging an indulgent smirk with her son. Jensen smiled ruefully up at Jared.
“What’re you taking for this?” Harry asked.
“Extra strength Tylenol.”
“With or without codeine?”
“Without. I didn’t want to pass out.”
“Well, after your little trip here, I think it might be a good idea to take at least one with codeine tonight. Were you given some or you want me to write you a ‘script? You’ll thank me in the morning.”
“I got some from the doc in Vancouver, so I’ll take a couple tonight.”
“Actually a light rub might help too. I have some Tiger Balm at home, I’ll send it over.”
“Wait - tiger balm? What’s that?”
Jared chuckled at his obviously concerned tone. “It’s this Chinese medicinal balm. Harry’s cure-all for everything. But it actually works pretty good on muscle pain. I have some upstairs, doc, no worries.”
“Chinese medicine?” Jensen leaned in close to Jared and whispered so the doctor wouldn’t hear. “It’s not actually made from tigers, is it? Jesus. Like tiger penises or something. Like that documentary we saw on Discovery with the bears.”
“Tiger penises? Really?” Jared whispered back, barely controlling a laugh, his eyes flashing more blue than green now.
“I don’t know!”
“No. No tiger penises, I promise,” he said, smiling softly, bumping his nose affectionately against Jensen’s cheek.
“Or penises of any other kind.”
“Well, I don’t know if I can promise that.”
Thank God only Jared saw his fiery blush at that statement; his siblings would’ve never let him live it down.
The Padalecki parents absolutely insisted that the Ackleses all stay; first for dinner, and then just spend the San Antonio stint of their road trip with them. Plans to hang out were made as Jeff and Josh, and Mack and Meg, and even both sets of moms and dads bonded, every one of them slipping easily into teasing banter and trading stories as if they had known each other all their lives. Jared watched their interactions, grinning like a loon the whole time and occasionally sharing a speaking glance with Jensen.
They were thinking the same thing, of that Jared was certain. Their two families had come together and connected just as easily as Jared and Jensen had bonded... umm, after their initial little misunderstanding had been cleared up. It was like fate or destiny or some profound shit like that. Whatever. As far as Jared was concerned, it was just... right.
It was also right sitting next to Jensen at the dining room table, his thigh pressed up against Jen’s, their elbows occasionally bumping as they spooned Sherri’s warm, creamy tomato soup into their hungry mouths. Jen ate so ravenously that his mother commented on it.
“I see someone’s appetite has returned,” she smirked at her son, who smiled right back at her. Then Jen’s gaze sought out his father’s and Jared watched with interest as father and son looked at each other, their smiles mirrored in their identical eyes. It was really endearing to see Jensen this way. Jared could have died from the cute, seriously.
“Make way for the main course, family,” Meg announced as she and Mack cleared away the empty soup bowls and started setting fully served plates in front of everyone. Jared sighed happily as he picked up his knife and fork, which he then promptly then dropped with a loud clatter when Jensen grabbed his thigh.
And Jared’s dick noticed that hand right the fuck away, seeing as how it was in such close proximity after all.
Only Jensen wasn’t looking at Jared in any way that could be construed as even being in the same ball park as sexual, instead he leant towards Jared and nodded down at the table, in what Jared supposed was meant to be an unobtrusive manner.
“What?” Jared whispered. Jensen just jerked his head towards the table again, looking vaguely disgusted. Jared was almost affronted on his mother’s behalf. He still didn’t get what the problem was though. Then the hand left Jared’s thigh and pointed vehemently at Jensen’s plate. Ah, the plate. On which there were mushrooms.
Jared lasted about two seconds before he snorted out a laugh. Jensen glared at him in consternation as the conversation at the table stalled and everyone looked at them.
“What is it?” Sherri directed her question at Jared. Jensen covered his face with one hand, obviously embarrassed as all get out.
“Nothing, Momma.” Jared chest shook with laughter as he looked at his sister, who was sitting closest to the kitchen. “Meg, grab a clean plate from the kitchen, will ya please? Jen has a mortal fear of button mushrooms.”
“What?” A bunch of people around the table squawked in unison. Jensen groaned.
Mack snorted into her chocolate milk. “Do you know about his pet peeve of pickles?”
“Shut up, Mack,” Jensen grumbled.
“Mack darlin’, the entire Supernatural fan base knows about Jensen and his pickles!” Jared laughed uproariously as he scooped the offending fungi onto his own plate and moved everything that had not been in contact with them onto the clean plate, which he then placed in front of Jensen.
“Thanks to Jared,” Jensen complained.
“What do you boys talk about during those conventions?” Donna asked with a wry grin.
“Jensen’s fans are loyal. Their love for him runs true and deep. They need to know these things.”
“And you aim to tell ‘em.”
“It’s my sworn duty as the president of the Jensen Ackles fan club.” Jensen just groaned again as Jared cackled. “Don’t worry, baby, I’ll protect you from the hordes of screaming fangirls. Look how well I vanquished your fungus, dude!”
“Gross. I’m trying to eat, you moron.”
Jared grinned, his gaze still locked with Jensen’s. “I think it’s adorable that you’re afraid of button mushrooms when you’re cute as a button yourself.” And yeah, Jared really needed to think before he spoke. Everyone snorted out laughing, including Jensen, and Jared resisted the urge to thump his head on the table. Repeatedly. “Just call me an idiot and get it over with.”
“Idiot.” Is what Jensen said, only it sounded like something else. Jared looked at the man beside him: his dazzling smile, his bright eyes, his expressive face. Yeah. ‘Idiot’ was what Jen said but somehow there was such a wealth of affection and adoration behind it, that Jared heard: I love you, you idiot.
“What?” Jensen asked when Jared remained silently staring, his voice soft and a little husky with laughter.
Jared had a sudden flash of an image in his mind’s eye: a candid shot of the two of them sitting side by side on their directors’ chairs. Jared had been talking, obviously saying something characteristically dorky, because Jensen had just sat there looking at him, elbow on knee, his chin resting on his hand, his indulgent smile hidden slightly by the knuckles of his hand. He had looked... beautiful. Really, there was no other adjective that described him better and Jared had promptly lost his heart. For about the millionth time. He was so grateful that someone had captured that moment on film; he looked at that picture every day.
That same look, that same smile, was on Jensen’s face now, and for a few seconds, Jared couldn’t breathe. Everything, everyone, but Jensen faded to black.
A tiny frown appeared on Jensen’s face at Jared’s continued silence and the words rushed past his lips almost before he could think them.
“God, Jen,” his breath puffed out of his mouth, and he inhaled shallowly, his head leaning in closer as his hands came up to cup Jensen’s face, thumbs grazing reverently across his cheeks. “You are so beautiful. Inside and out. You leave me breathless every single time I see you, and I love you so much, and when you’re not with me... Oh God, I don’t ever want you to not be with me...” Jared almost choked on the emotion welling in his chest, stupid tears filling his eyes.
Then Jensen placed a warm hand, his right hand - like so many times in the past when it didn’t mean as much - on Jared’s chest, right over his rapidly beating heart.
Suddenly Jared could breathe again.
Then his left hand came up to gently stroke Jared’s face, swiping away errant tears.
“I love you too, Jay.” His voice was quiet and soft but his tone was sure, certain. And just like in those cheesy romantic movies, everything slowed to a standstill. Jared’s heart stopped. Time stopped. The earth stopped. There was only Jensen. And he was leaning in... and Jared just gravitated towards him. The hand on his face slipped through the hair at the back of his head as Jen’s mouth softly closed over his.
Good God Almighty, it felt like he had waited an entire lifetime for this moment, and Jared was eternally grateful that he was already sitting down because this one kiss from Jensen shot sparks through his entire body. He felt like he was somehow flying and free-falling at the same time, impossible yet incredible.
Jensen loved him. And this shy, sweet kiss, their first real kiss, was not just that... it was a promise. It was a pledge. Hearts, minds, bodies, souls: all in. It didn’t need words. All it needed was this perfect, perfect kiss.
At the dinner table.
In full view of both of their families.
Who didn’t even know they were gay.
Hell, they themselves had yet to discuss that shit.
It appeared that Jensen came to that realization at just about the same moment as Jared did, and he pulled away in shock, absently licking his lips. Jared tracked the slight movement of tongue over mouth with avid interest. But then Jensen cleared his throat and Jared was jerked back into the present.
“I guess it’s too much to hope that nobody saw that, right?” Jensen quipped. Jared grinned at him and he smiled back.
Alan, who from all accounts was usually a very quiet man, spoke first. “We see what you want us to see.”
Jensen met his father’s eyes straight on, fearlessly, before addressing everyone else. “I want you all to see that I love Jared,” Jensen looked at Jared and smiled that amazing smile again, and sounding ridiculously happy, continued, “and Jared loves me, and we haven’t talked about this or figured anything out yet, but we will. And we will be together, no matter what it takes, no matter what the stakes are, no matter who or what stands in our way.” He exhaled loudly after all those words rushed right out of him. Jared’s arm wound itself around Jen’s shoulders, squeezing reassuringly.
Jared was floored, and it was actually difficult to tear his eyes off Jensen to look at their families. “Yeah. What he said,” he confirmed eloquently.
There was pin-drop silence for all of ten seconds before Mack said, “You realize that we’re not totally surprised, right?”
Jensen and Jared both gaped at her, jaws dropping in shock. Jensen recovered first. “What? How? Wait, this took us by surprise! Hell, I’m still in shock!”
“That’s because boys are so oblivious,” Megan chimed in.
Donna snorted. “There’s an understatement if I ever heard one. And don’t be silly, Jensen. It’s not like we didn’t see this coming.”
Gerry nodded in agreement. “A blind person coulda seen this coming.”
Of course, it was too much to hope that the others wouldn’t add their two cents worth. Josh kicked it off with, “A blind, deaf, dumb and stupid person coulda seen this coming.”
Jared sighed happily, draping his arm over the back of Jensen’s chair and leaning in to kiss his cheek. “Apparently we’re incapable of subtlety.”
“About how much you two obviously love each other? You’re both about as subtle as a Sherman tank.” Alan smiled indulgently at them before grinning at Gerry, who was sitting next to him.
Gerry chuckled. “The way you two just move around each other, ever since Jensen got here and even on the show, like there’s some sort of magnetic, centrifugal force pulling you together. Kinda hard to miss, boys.”
Meg and Mack immediately looked at each before grinning and busting out a little Faith Hill: “It’s the way you love me, it’s a feeling like this, it’s centrifugal motion, it’s perpetual bliss...”
Sherri laid a hand gently on Jared’s, squeezing slightly. “Plus, it’s always ‘Jensen this’ and I’m sure y’all get ‘Jared that’. I mean, JT’s been back here all of three days and they’re always on the phone with each other, all the time, texting, talking. You two should seriously look into a couples’ cell phone plan.”
Jared kept his gaze trained resolutely at the table. “Er... we did.”
“It’s not funny!” Jensen exclaimed over the raucous laughter. “We had to get that plan! Jared calls me from his bedroom upstairs.”
Meg and Mack giggled and kept singing: “It’s that pivotal moment, it’s ahh... subliminal, this kiss, this kiss, it’s criminal... this kiss, this kiss.”
Jeff threw his hands over his ears, glaring at his sister and her new partner-in-crime. “Okay, it has to be said. While I’m cool with the whole ‘My brother is suddenly gay’ thing, I’m not sure about the kissing at the dinner table. Or the singing about the kissing at the dinner table.”
Mack smirked mischievously at Jeff but refrained from bursting into further song. The look in her eyes when she leveled her gaze at Jensen though, was wicked. “Besides, it’s not as if we haven’t seen the internet.”
Jeff shuddered. “Oh my God. The internet. My brain still hasn’t recovered from that. And my eyes. My eyes.”
“You too? I hear ya, man,” Josh commiserated, patting his back. “Mack made me watch YouTube stuff.”
Jeff cringed in sympathy. “Meg made me read a fan-fiction,” he informed Josh, his tone leaving no doubt as to what he thought was worse.
Meg grinned nastily at them both. “Hey! It was sweet and kinda hot. A friend of mine told me about it after we watched ‘The Monster at the End of This Book’ when Dean and Sam talked about it.”
Jared went scarlet. “That’s sick! I’m your brother.”
“Sam and Dean are brothers,” Mack shrugged, feigning a nonchalance that was betrayed by the impish gleam in her eyes. “What about Wincest?”
Sherri coughed delicately. “No Wincest at the dinner table. Please.”
Meg shot one last volley in Jared’s direction. “We may be Texan, but we’re open-minded individuals. We can take it.”
“Yeah, just not at the dinner table. Gotcha, Mrs. P.,” Mack giggled.
“Speak for yourself,” Jeff muttered. “I can’t take it. We only read a little bit of one, and I’m scarred for life.”
Jared turned his back on the lot of them and faced Jensen. “We have a weird, weird family.”
Jensen grinned at him and stage-whispered, “God, and we’re responsible for bringing them together.”
“How did we get so lucky?” Jared asked him, his voice and smile soft, loving.
Leaning close, Jensen smiled the smile Jared always thought of as that smile. “I think the universe owed me one.”
