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[the_moo_cow]

Ugh. The dining hall is closed from 8-10:30 at night...another hour and a half to go...stupid calculus. Fuck, I'm not even doing calculus, I'm doing trig review in the appendix of the calc book. Dammit.

Really, I'm just bitching - it's not that bad, just time-consuming. I keep taking forever to figure out exactly how I'm supposed to be solving

Comments

[klydenukelove]

I always found math to be like meditation in that way. meditation is way harder than calc, but both also seem to alter my state of mind, make me feel more like an limb than a person (which is very good; it makes me free and reckless).

It's funny how the frequency of entries you make correspond to your mood in my mind. More=lesshappyjesse.

well, I hope you find enrichment in your blossoming trigonometry soul-flower, and remember, headache can be an early symptom of bubonic plague.

[the_moo_cow]

hmm, yeah, like...the math solves itself, you're just watching it unfold.

it's a certain mood that i have to be in, definitely...but not necessarily unhappy. just have to feel like sharing something. which isn't too often. i guess i keep my own counsel.

and, thank you. i'll remember that. keep some leeches handy.

[the_moo_cow]

p.s. don't you think it's strange that feeling like a limb (connected, part of a larger whole, which would seem to imply lack of free will) makes you feel free and reckless? maybe it's just an illusion. or maybe limbs have different connotations for you, i dunno.

[klydenukelove]

the lack of free will is what does it for me; no will, no responsibility. Think about it this way: would you stick your feet the same places you would stick your braincase?

I suppose it would be more accurate to say that it makes me feel like my body and its continued well-being is not very important. that whole trancendent experience thing.