Comments | the_rotten1: Stuff... it happened.

the_rotten1

Stuff... it happened.

Jun 30, 2011 11:59

I never thought the summer would be so exhausting. Or so busy. I got the kids all registered for school next year, did a ton of paper work to keep our aid going, and got us all registered at the YMCA. It's really nice to be able to work out again. I don't think I have since I was in my late teens. I'd like to get into shape. You know, some shape ( Read more... )

trans, real life, kids

Comments 9

muskokan July 1 2011, 01:18:37 UTC

glad to hear that some of the little things are going well. I'm sure the bigger ones will come with time.

I'm beginning to feel seriously impatient myself though I feel that I don't have any right to since I know that there are guys who have been struggling with stuff a LOT longer than me.

the_rotten1 July 1 2011, 06:11:26 UTC

I think the worst part is that I feel so helpless sometimes. Now that I know why I'm experiencing all this gender dysphoria related stress I want to do something about it! But there's really not much else I can do on my own right now.

I may end up seeing a therapist, idk. I don't exactly need one, but it would be nice to get a letter and to have someone understanding to talk about my family situation with.

muskokan July 1 2011, 23:15:19 UTC

I definitely understand where you're coming from, now that I 'get it' I feel like it's a lot harder than necessary to get what I need to feel better...

and honestly sometimes I wonder whether it wasn't easier to just not know, because now I do just feel powerless.

helliongoddess July 30 2011, 17:03:52 UTC

I don't think I have known a single trans person yet who felt their transition went as fast as they wanted it to go - it seems to go with the territory. That it is moving forward at all, and you have made the strides you have with the kids (I read the latest post - Go Dad!) is wonderful. But I know it's hard. Hang in there, it will all happen sooner or later. Look at it this way - the longer you wait, the more time they have to come up with better F-M surgical options than they have now (assuming someday you might want to pursue that.) The Merciful Goddess knows, there is lots of room for improvement in that area ( ... )

the_rotten1 August 3 2011, 03:54:47 UTC

I don't know... I think my family are about as "accepting" right now as they're ever going to be. As long as their religion says it's wrong, that's what they're going to believe. My feelings and experiences don't matter.

Don't get me wrong, I'm glad they're not turning their collective backs on me, but... that doesn't change the fact that they view me as the family freak.

Talking to the therapist helps. At least I feel like I'm doing something to work towards my transition.

helliongoddess August 3 2011, 04:16:12 UTC

Yeah, you definitely are. The therapy is a very important part of the process - some trans folks get in a hurry and forget it, and I've seen some messes come of that. I was relieved my daughter was very sensible about that part - and it worked in her favor when it came time for the surgery. She had no trouble getting her approval.

I'm not just blowing smoke up your whatever about your family - I have seen people change and come around that I never thought would. Yeah, some never do, unfortunately (my kid's father never has), but some can really surprise you, with time. You never know. Don't give up hope - if you can keep a positive attitude with them as much as possible, it will help them reach whatever degree of accommodation with it that they can reach that much quicker. Yeah, so much of the burden should not have to be on you, but that's the way it is. *sigh* Ultimately, it's how you live your life that matters, and it sounds like you are doing all the right things, kiddo.

the_rotten1 August 3 2011, 04:31:10 UTC

I thought about it, and while I don't really feel that therapy is "necessary" in the sense that I couldn't get along with out it I do think things will go much more smoothly in the future if I have a letter. Especially considering that many of the medical personnel I'll be working with may not be very knowledgeable about trans people, if they know anything about it at all. No one I've met out here is knowledgeable about it, so far. I know more than anyone else I've met.

As for the family, I've never got anything but abuse and neglect from some of them. I don't expect any different. Maybe I'm being cynical and they'll warm up to it in time, but I doubt it will be any time soon, if at all. Faith is everything to them. My mother already said that if she "had to choose between God and me, she'd choose God." (Because obviously what I'm doing is wrong and bad and she can't choose both.)

Thread 6