jeeze. i haven't been on this thing in AGES... lots has been going on.. reconnecting with old friends, making TONS of new ones that i know will last through the coming years... integrating with a beautiful community, finding myself, getting ready to graduate college... learning to trust myself and others without fear of vicious backlash, yadda ( Read more... )

so i'm not going to lie. the past couple weeks have just about been the worst i've had in awhile. and i feel like i sound incredibly emo when i say that. but whatever... i just use this thing to vent anyways ( Read more... )

omg how pathetic am i??? i went and saw casanova tonight... alone. and considering my recent slump concerning my lack of love interests... it didn't help much to watch a movie about the world's most enticing lover ever. so i started thinking on the way home because at midnight there isn't much traffic on the interstate so i didn't have to put as ( Read more... )

finally talked to someone... why didn't it make me feel better? i fear i'm losing my grip on reality... that i'm sinking into the black abyss of depression again... and i dont know if i know how to climb that slippery slope up again. i'm scared... i dont like this feeling... feeling like i have no control over my life anymore... it petrifies me. i ( Read more... )

urg... this whole freaking year (2005) is just doomed for me isn't it? i hate this year!!! the only good thing is there are only 21 school days until graduation! then i go onto another hell... yippy skippy!