(no subject)
instead of packing ive been doing everything else but. ..
ive been looking through old boxes and work and i started thinking. what do you do with all the old precious things in you life? i have tons of boxes filled with old prints and work ranging from high school to now. i cant throw them away. but do they help me? i cant look back at the old prints anymore and feel good. theyre so different, differrent style agenda and emotional settings. i dont think i can grow anymore from the "hits", the pictures that were my favorites. as ive been scrounging around, the stuff that struck me the most were the skeleton pieces. the works in progress. its nice to have a perfect complete and presentable mounted piece, but im drawn the the steps. when i first started printintg my own color i would practically keep everything. every contact and test strip, i thought they were so special. but that got old, and i released my self from the clutter. but now the steps there are more important then where it went.
maybe this has alot to do with my paintbynumber obsession. last week i bought a new pbn, and its so ugly. its horribly done and you can see the numbers beneath certain areas of paint. its become one of my favorites. and now my "favorite" old pieces are dull to me. they sit in a box, repressenting what i once did. i think i want all the processes out there in the open. i love grids left on paintings, and contact sheets. right beside me framed on my wall is a Jim Dow 8x10 contact, its one of a kind,he uses masking tape and his crazy handwriting to make it special. i want to integrate this passion of the inner skeleton out. that means im going to have to progress onto 8x10 film maybe. at 10$ a sheet, i think im shit out of luck... maybe this is all so passionate right now because i need the bullshit out in the open, or maybe it just mirrors my laziness. regardless i know that the step by step process of the art means more to me. polaroids are one step, (fuck theres even a camera called the one step),but anyways i love them-its there. its obvious. but with tedious stuff like large formate or any other format actually i want it, i need the map lines.
here are some testrips.
this pic represented something really emotional, but now the test strip gets me there instead of the old print stored away.
this is one of the first color pictures i printed. i dont care much for the photo itself-but this strip is special
the pbn lady
old stuff that i never touched.......
here are contacts that never went there.
these dusty contacts just sit there. i do nothing with them. its like i collect them.
these photos ment alot to me years ago, but what i love now are the markings all over them the notes and marks id make on the contacts to remind my self to print them.
works in progress...
Completed
all of these were it years ago. these were the completed pieces that i loved. now they sit here representing me i guess. i used to love these so much
now i dont know what to think about these. I always hate looking back at old work, but i also am never satisfied with new works....
ok enough rambling about art and bullshit. i need to pack and get ready.