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Character: Rosalie "Ro" Rowen
Series: The Zeta Project
Age: ~16 (by Season 2)
Canon: When the National Security Agency (NSA) created Infiltration Unit Zeta, they produced a highly advanced robot programmed to destroy and (via holographic projections) impersonate targeted individuals -- a perfect killing machine. But they didn't count on their infiltration unit having a conscience. Upon discovering that one of his targets was an innocent man, Zeta abandoned the mission and refused to kill anymore. Now on the run from the NSA, who believe he's been reprogrammed by terrorists, Zeta travels the country searching for his elusive creator Dr. Selig-- the one man who can prove once and for all that he is indeed peaceful.
Unfortunately, Zeta knows very little about how to blend in with the human race. That's where Rosalie ("Ro" for short) comes in. A teenage runaway, Ro came along for the ride after Zeta-- or "Zee" as she calls him-- saved her from a gang leader. At first glance, Ro appears to be the opposite of Zeta in many ways; she's cynical and sarcastic, reluctant to trust others, and is frequently frustrated by Zeta's naivete and gullibility. But underneath the "tough kid" exterior, Ro has a good heart, and she genuinely cares for and believes in Zeta. She'll go to any lengths to help him, from outsmarting bounty hunters and NSA agents to trying to teach "Zee" about humanity, humor, relaxing and fun. That last part isn't easy-- especially the sense of humor-- but Ro is too stubborn to back down from a challenge. After all, it's no fun just staying in the car sitting on the sidelines.
Note: Permission has been obtained from Zeta to namedrop.
Sample Post:
"Stay in the car, Ro. You'll be safe there, Ro. I'll just go off into the Swamp of No Return and walk into an obvious trap all by myself, Ro." You'd think Zee would know better by now. Like I'd just sit back and let him have all the fun? Uh-uh. Not gonna happen. Besides, this counts as staying in the car-- he didn't say the car had to stay exactly where it was. You know, parked by the road instead of... parked in the swamp muck like it is now. Sideways. I swear, that tree came out of nowhere. And for once I'm not kidding. Sorry, Zee, the cavalry's gonna be a little delayed.
So much for my cunning rescue plan. But seriously? I had to do something-- it's totally obvious this is a setup. A secret robotics conference in the middle of a swamp? Right, because you want your robot splashing into sinkholes. And how the vidscreen shut off two seconds after he left? Totally coincidental. Uh-huh. And the bunch of guys in neon gorilla suits rushing the car all of a sudden? ...Okay, that was kinda random. But still. The only thing that's missing is a big, flashing "It's a trap!" sign.
...I stand corrected, that's quite the sign you've got there. Three points for creative use of glitter. It's even complete with one of the roadkill wannabes that got me into this mess. What are you supposed to be, all the way out here? Some kind of sign guard? Way to thwart my sign-thieving plans, I'm shaking in my muck-soaked sneakers. Really. You're terrifying. You're fearsome. You're... the quiet type, huh? Can you even hear me through that mask? You don't have to talk, just point me to the nearest service station, will you? I'm having some car trouble.
Apparently in your language, "service station" means "big box propped up with a stick." Ooookay. Wait-- that's your fiendishly clever trap? Unless you're trying to catch the world's biggest moron, I don't think it's gonna work. Look, I'll make you a deal: you show me how to get where I want to go, and I'll give you a couple of tips on your technique. First off? You fail at camouflage. Ditch the sign; truth in advertising never works anyway. You gotta be sneaky. Make everything look safe until you’ve got them right where you want them. Look, I'll keep it simple. Just use some branches to make the box look like part of this bush-- which would work better if the bush wasn't trying to eat my leg! Hey, monkey boy, could you help me out here? On the count of three: One, two-- THREE!
Oops! My bad. Got to watch out for those sinkholes. But hey, swamp muck is a good look for you. I can't believe you fell for that one-- no, wait, yes I can. So, scary sign guard, you gonna point me in the right direction now? Cause I got no problem letting you sink.
Voting went here. 97.9% WTF no really WTF? ♥