well im sitting here listening to the song as it finishes up downloading. i couldnt help but sob violently while i recited the first few verses along with ozzy. my god. i can't believe this happening to me.

oh god this pain. this pain. it's so agonizing. so much of it. it feels like it's surrounding me. swirling around my throat. drowning me. wanting to choke me. i never knew i could react this way about a friend i loved. although we knew each other for such a short amount of time ( Read more... )

wait!

i know what i need.

what i need is a goal.

but first, i need some money.

wow i'm actually smiling.

i feel better already.

heh, i'm smiling again.

(insert sigh of relief here)

god i haven't been this hurt in a while. a long while ( Read more... )

I hide I hide I hide I hide I hide I hide I hide I hide ( Read more... )

Wow I'm finally back in the city after......9 days in the wilderness in pennsylvania. Every day was more or less a routine with some variation here and there. 3 hours walks through the woods here, Wimbledon there, baseball there, movies there and here, and phone conversations with friends. Those last two were the best parts of my week, although ( Read more... )

I feel miserable. I can't eat. I can't sleep. I slept only from midnight to 5:20 this morning. My skin is pale and corpselike. I have extremely dark circles under my eyes as a result of malnutrition. My head is pounding and I gag and choke every time I think of eating something. I'm starving. I can't feel better. Even my mother was concerned last ( Read more... )

I left alone my mind was blank ( Read more... )

Sometimes I wish i could be happy without having to deal with people. I know it's virtually impossible, but can't life be simpler? There are always lessons to learn and morals to this story and that, why can't this all be abolished ( Read more... )

This week has been ok, I've had a few tests. I think I did well on them considering test-taking is my weakest skill. Alex got an 1100 on the SATs, which isn't TOO bad but the poor girl always aims so high, she's rarely satisfied with her grades. That's pretty common these days though ( Read more... )