i must confess, this is probably the first of your entries that i've fully read in a while. i'm glad i read this one though - that's really beautiful of you to have been able to see that woman and contemplate her life and juxtapose it with your own past and present, while at the same time admitting your unassurance of future prospects. i hope things turn out well for both you and for her (not to say either of you are necessarily currently doing poorly); i of course don't really have any pope-eque powers of blessing you with some higher veneration, but i send you my blessings all the same, and hope that you continue to see the world so beautifully as you do.
It's always good to remember where we came from. It helps shape who we are and where we are going. Not that it will trap you into a certain lifestyle (which you have proven) but it gives you perspective.
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namaste.
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Mental note: maybe try to write some shorter posts from time to time.
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