New Fic!
Title: Unanticipated Outcomes (Part II)
Fandom: SGA
Pairing: John/Rodney
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Rodney was exactly where he belonged. It was the last place he ever expected to find himself.
Notes: A big squishy hug to mmmchelle, who bravely encouraged me through another long fic. Thank you sweetie, for the betaing and the feedback and the hand-holding. And a special thank you to reedfem, who knows all kinds of cool things about guns weapons and how to fire them. She's fabulous.
Unanticipated Outcomes, Part II
***
"Well, where is it?" Rodney asked as Ronon stalked along the rock wall. "I'm not getting any energy readings. Are you sure it's even here?"
Ronon ignored him. Spreading hands over the stone, he pressed down.
One door-sized section of the stone slid away, revealing a dimly lit interior.
"Oh. Nice going." Eager and impatient, Rodney tried to go through but Lorne held up a hand, stopping him. "Fine, fine." Rodney hung back allowing Lorne's team to go through first.
"Clear," Lorne announced a moment later.
"Okay, if the Wraith had come here," asked Rodney as he stepped into the large open room, "why aren't there people hiding in these tunnels?" He looked around the room--smooth, featureless walls, lighted with glowing tubes along the ceiling--not quite up to the level of Ancient technology, but definitely not primitive, either.
"It goes a lot further back," Ronon answered. "See, that back corridor branches out."
But Rodney wasn't listening. "Hey, hey, hey," he said, sweeping his arms around. "The walls--this kind of stone, it's the same as in the vid with Sheppard."
Ronon looked. "They're just blank walls."
"Exactly." Rodney couldn't figure out why no one else got it. "Sheppard has to be here. The walls, the level of lighting--"
Teyla was nodding. "Assuming they haven't moved him. It's possible."
"Let's split up and do a sweep," Lorne ordered.
Rodney pulled out his life signs detector. It lit up, little round dots representing the search team, but then the image wavered and blinked out. "What the hell?" He left the room, stepping back out into the sunshine, and the device reactivated.
"What is it?" Lorne asked.
"Crap. There's something in the stone that interferes with the detector," Rodney told them. "Just to make things even more difficult. God damn it."
"Then we will search every room," Teyla said. "No matter how many rooms are here." She spoke with quiet determination.
Rodney chose the center corridor. Empty rooms on either side, each checked carefully but they yielded nothing, no sign of recent habitation, no furniture, no devices, floors swept clean. Maybe a little too clean, which might mean something, or it might not. Or maybe he was simply clinging to the desperate hope that this was the right place, because those walls were the same, even though there were probably a billion plain flat walls in the galaxy.
A half hour later Rodney was deeper into the mountainside, still trying to convince himself he was right. He couldn't take another search like this.
He was sure something inside him would break if they had to return to Atlantis empty-handed.
Again.
He glanced down at the biosign detector, trying to catch a reading as the image flickered in and out. No signs other than himself, everyone was out of range, spread out in the mazelike tunnels. He had been listening to the team checking in on the open channel, but their voices were now fading into senseless static. Any other time Rodney would have been curious as to what in the stone was causing the interference, but now it was just another hindrance.
The detector flickered again.
A round dot flashed in the upper left quadrant.
Rodney stopped in his tracks, staring at it. But the detector remained dark.
"Damn it," Rodney growled, slapping the detector. "Come on, come on, light up for me."
When the detector refused, Rodney took off down the corridor, running, and yes, there was another passageway off to the left. As he turned, it occurred to him that the dot may not necessarily be a friendly, so he tucked the detector away and pulled his sidearm from the holster. A turn to the right, and another empty corridor stretched out before him. Panting, Rodney held his gun up, arm trembling slightly, and he tried to remember everything Sheppard had taught him, straightening his shoulders, steadying his arm as he crept forward.
The first room to the right was empty.
And the second, too.
Then he saw the door.
A simply made door with a heavy bolt and a slot on the bottom, the kind of slot you might use to slide a tray of foot though.
Rodney rushed to the door, raised himself on his tiptoes and peered through the small window.
"Oh, god," he breathed. "John."
Sheppard was on the floor, curled up tightly, so still that for one awful moment Rodney thought he was dead. Then he saw that Sheppard's chest rise as he took a breath.
"Sheppard," Rodney said. "Hey--" He tapped his radio frantically. "Sheppard, I found Sheppard," he said, holstering his gun before tugging at the large crossbolt and pulling the door open.
He bounded into the room. Sheppard opened his eyes, his body uncurling. "Rodney?" he whispered in a rusty, unused voice.
Rodney could hear the wonder and the uncertainty in it, and god, how long had Sheppard been in there, abandoned to die? He knelt and slid an arm around Sheppard's body, raising him up. Sheppard stank of sweat and piss, and his arm was shaky as he grabbed onto Rodney's tac vest. "Rodney?"
"Yes, yes, yes, oh, thank god." Rodney helped Sheppard sit up, bracing him with an arm around his shoulders and then Rodney got something in his eye--both eyes--and he had to blink rapidly to clear his vision.
"Hey," Sheppard said.
"Yeah, um," Rodney said, pressing his face into Sheppard's matted hair. "Hey."
Sheppard raised his head. Rodney's lips brushed against his temple, almost like a kiss. He lingered there, so happy he couldn't speak, so thankful to be able to touch Sheppard, to feel his warm body. His warm, living, breathing body. Sheppard leaned against him, a hand twisting in the sleeve of Rodney's jacket and Rodney thought he could sit with Sheppard forever and be perfectly content.
A burst of radio chatter brought Rodney around.
"Yes, yes, the Colonel, I have the Colonel," Rodney responded.
Sheppard roused himself. "Water?"
"Oh god, yes, I should have thought--stupid of me--" Rodney babbled as he awkwardly reached for his bottle with one hand and unscrewed the cap. Sheppard grabbed for it and Rodney had to hold it steady as Sheppard drank, throat moving convulsively as he swallowed. "Whoa, careful, not too much."
Sheppard coughed and Rodney pulled the bottle away. For a moment Rodney thought Sheppard was going to lose it and he didn't even care if Sheppard vomited all over him. "Okay?" Rodney asked when Sheppard relaxed against him.
"More."
Rodney held the bottle for him again while he drank. Sheppard looked like hell, face bruised and haggard, and the hand on Rodney's arm was unsteady and suddenly Rodney was furious. He hoped to hell that the Wraith had gotten hold of the kidnappers and sucked the life out of every last one of them.
The sound of running footsteps drifted in from the hall, and Rodney glanced up to find Ronon and Teyla at the door. "Colonel Sheppard," Teyla exclaimed.
"What took you guys so long?" Sheppard said. His voice was weak but they all grinned at each other.
Rodney's world righted itself.
Then it was chaos all around, with Lorne and the rest of the search team crowding into the small cell, helping Sheppard up, trying to radio the Daedalus and the team waiting with the nearby jumper. "Can you walk, sir?" Lorne was asking as Sheppard rose unsteadily to his feet.
"I can carry him," Ronon said.
"I'm fine, I'm fine." Sheppard still clung to Rodney, a hand fisted in his jacket. "I can walk to the jumper, damn it."
"If Ronon feels it is necessary to carry you, then he will carry you," Teyla said sharply.
Sheppard blinked. "Yes, ma'am."
"I'd listen to her if I were you," Ronon said.
"However we do it, let's get the hell out of here before we have company, okay?" Lorne hustled them out of the room.
Sheppard was determined to walk, supported by both Rodney and Ronon. They ended up half-dragging him down the corridors, and finally they were safe inside the jumper and heading for the gate.
It was only after the medical team greeted them and Carson shooed Rodney away that Sheppard released his grip on Rodney's jacket.
***
Exhausted, Rodney went back to his room and showered. Such a rush of emotion to find Sheppard, and now he felt drained of all energy and emotion. All he could think of was way Sheppard reached for him; he couldn't get it out of his mind, Sheppard reaching for him, whispering his name in wonder, and Rodney's throat grew tight as he turned his head into the spray.
Rodney was sure he wouldn't have survived such an ordeal, locked up and alone, waiting to die, waiting for rescue, waiting helplessly for something, anything.
But now it was over, Sheppard was going to be okay, as soon as he got some sleep.
When Rodney sprawled face down on his bed, eyes closed, nothing happened. He didn't drift off. Instead his mind raced, replaying the moment when he peered into that heavy wooden door again and again. If he hadn't gone down that hallway, if he hadn't kept his eyes on the flickering life signs detector, he would have missed it and maybe they would have left that planet without ever finding Sheppard, leaving him to die alone.
Which was ridiculous, because they would have checked every single room, as Teyla had said.
Rodney flipped onto his back and stared at the ceiling. Sheppard was safe, he reminded himself, tucked away in the infirmary.
Alone, perhaps, much like he had been in that cell.
Punching his pillow, Rodney rearranged his blankets, pulling them up under his chin, and determinedly closed his eyes.
Sheppard was probably asleep, anyway.
A moment later Rodney got up, threw on some clothes and headed to the transport.
The infirmary was quiet, lights dimmed for sleeping. Rodney nodded to the nurse on duty as he strolled in, and she didn't stop him. As he made his way to the curtained-off area where Sheppard lay, he could see a small figure sitting in the chair beside the bed.
Teyla rose to her feet and acknowledged Rodney with a tilt of her head as he approached. "He has been sleeping," she said in a whisper. "Although he is very restless."
"That's certainly understandable," Rodney whispered back. Face bearded, hair flat and greasy, Sheppard looked pale and sickly against the white sheets. Yet the sight comforted Rodney.
"And now I believe it is time for me to rest."
Rodney turned to her. "Yes, go on, I'll take over from here."
She flashed a lovely smile at him as she left, and Rodney found himself smiling back.
Sheppard was back, Sheppard was fine, and everything was going to be okay.
For the time being.
Rodney settled into the chair, arms crossed over his chest, and watched. At first Sheppard slept soundly, but after a time he grunted in his sleep, then twitched. He made another noise then jerked his head and opened his eyes, blinking wildly.
"Hey," Rodney whispered, leaning over Sheppard and placing a hand gently on his shoulder.
Sheppard's eyes focused. "Rodney?" he said. His lips curved with a hint of a smile. "Hi."
"Hi, yourself. How are you feeling?" Stupid question, but it was all he could come up with, especially since Sheppard looked happy to see him.
"Okay. Tired. Had a weird dream," Sheppard explained with a frown.
Sheppard was groggy and out of it, understandably so. "Yeah, well, go back to sleep now," Rodney told him, patting his shoulder. "I should go."
Sheppard's eyes widened. "No, wait--"
"Hmm?"
Hesitant, Sheppard asked, "Talk to me?"
"Oh," Rodney said. "I can do that. Um, what about?"
"Anything exciting happen while I was gone?"
Rodney dragged the chair closer. "Okay, let's see--turns out Radek was right about it not being the gamma rays that affected the MALP readings, but we still don't know what the problem is, so he wasn't entirely right, or entirely reasonable, either, mind you. Um, oh--you'll like this--Elizabeth found some information in the database on the personal shields."
"Really? Cool."
"We haven't deciphered all of the technical information, so I don't know if it's worth recommending to her that we pursue the technology," Rodney warned.
"I'll put in a good word," Sheppard whispered, as if it were some great conspiracy between them.
"I'm sure you will." Rodney grinned. Even though he thought the technology was a wash, he was happy to see the haunted look had left Sheppard's eyes. "What else? Let's see...oh, it seems that Lt. Cadman...."
As Rodney filled Sheppard in on the gossip, Sheppard's eyes flickered shut and his breathing grew steady once again. Rodney stopped talking and simply sat, not thinking about anything, and watched Sheppard sleep.
***
A few days later Rodney found Sheppard in his room.
"Rodney, come in, come on in." Sheppard sat up in his rumpled bed and waved Rodney over. Freshly showered and shaved, dressed in running pants and a tee-shirt, Sheppard looked much more like himself. Even with the bruise marking his forehead and the shadowed circles under his eyes.
"So, Carson set you free?" Rodney said.
Sheppard nodded. "As long as I take it easy. And it looks like Team Sheppard is going to have at least two weeks of downtime. Again. Sorry."
"Right, Colonel, you should definitely apologize for being taken prisoner, and nearly starving to death."
"Dehydration," Sheppard pointed out. "That would have killed me first."
Rodney felt a sudden chill. "Can we not talk about that?"
"Why? You saved me, Rodney." Sheppard's voice was remarkably warm. "Again."
"Yes, well, no, it was a team effort, but yes, and I'm getting tired of it. It's all very--" Rodney sat on the bed next to him and sighed. "Stressful."
And it was. He felt exhausted. Sleep deprived and punchy, his emotions stretched thin and he was pretty sure the knot between his shoulders was there to stay. For no reason at all he flashed back to being in an primitive, thatched-roof cottage, wind howling all around, huddled under a warm blanket with Sheppard.
Safe.
"Okay," Sheppard was saying. "Next couple of situations that arise, I'll rescue you."
"Good. See that you do."
Sheppard watched him, amused, but there was something else in with the amusement, something a little more thoughtful than his usual manner. "Rodney," he said, then hesitated.
"What?" Rodney grew concerned when Sheppard didn't answer immediately. "What is it?"
"When I was in that cell, when I looked up and saw you there, in the doorway--" Sheppard shifted, pulling his legs in and moving closer to Rodney. "It was nice, it was really, really nice."
Rodney frowned, certain that he was missing something, with the way Sheppard was speaking, slow and deliberate. Of course it was nice to be rescued from a dark, stinky cell, one that you were about die in. "I was pretty damn happy to see you there, too."
"You kissed me." Sheppard seemed oddly hopeful.
"Oh, right. That." Rodney's cheeks grew warm and he cast his eyes down at his hands. "I was kind of hoping you wouldn't remember that bit, you know with the being half-conscious and all."
"No, no, no, it's okay, really, Rodney."
A warm hand on Rodney's shoulder, and when Rodney looked up, Sheppard leaned in and kissed him.
On the lips.
Sheppard's lips, touching his lips.
Sheppard was kissing him.
Sheppard was apparently under the mistaken impression that Rodney had kissed him kissed him, when really all Rodney had done was hold his head and while perhaps his lips accidentally bumped against Sheppard's forehead, Rodney didn't really kiss guys, not like that. He wanted to explain the 'not kissing guys' thing to Sheppard but he couldn't talk because Sheppard kept pressing small, tentative kisses to his lips and whoa, wait a minute--Sheppard, gay?
For a guy, Sheppard's kisses were nice, and Rodney found himself leaning in and kissing Sheppard in return. Interesting thing was, Sheppard's lips were as soft as they looked, and it had been way too long since Rodney had kissed anyone. He liked kissing; he liked being close to Sheppard; he had missed Sheppard so god damn much and there was something sweetly intimate about the way Sheppard's breath puffed against his face. When Rodney slid his hand up onto Sheppard's neck, fingertips brushing against warm vulnerable skin, it was possible that they both sighed.
"I'm not gay," Rodney explained as soon as Sheppard pulled back.
Sheppard licked his lips. "Are you sure?"
"I think so." Rodney frowned, perplexed. "I mean, maybe. I didn't used to be."
Sheppard pointed a finger at him. "You didn't used to be into adventure and danger, either."
"I know I didn't, but I do, sometimes, but--but--" Rodney flailed, because he had no more words. He was all used up, with the worrying and searching and rescuing, and he really didn't like danger, no, not really, or worrying, especially worrying about Sheppard, and he had always been sure he knew exactly who he was and who he wanted to kiss. Yet with Sheppard right there in his face, earnest and sincere and handsome like the great big hero that he was, and Sheppard had scared the hell out of him by being gone for so long, and Rodney's brain was spinning right out of his head and nothing made sense and what the hell was he supposed to do now?
"Do you want to kiss some more?" Sheppard asked. "Just to be sure?"
"Okay".
Sheppard's lips met his again, and this time his fingers cupped the side of Rodney's face with a surprisingly delicate touch. When Sheppard pulled back his fingers lingered on Rodney's cheek, eyes bright with hope and yearning, like nothing Rodney had ever seen before, and so this time he kissed Sheppard, wrapping a hand around the back of his neck. It was kind of cool, because Sheppard breathed in sharply and made a little noise and then it got even cooler--no, no, make that hotwhen Sheppard's lips parted and Rodney touched his tongue to Sheppard's.
He was making out with Sheppard.
Eventually Rodney had to break off the kiss so he could breathe, his heart beating so fast that he was growing lightheaded. Sheppard used the opportunity to kiss Rodney's jaw and to nuzzle his ear, which sent shivery sensations all through Rodney's body. By the time Sheppard found his way to Rodney's neck, sucking and kissing, Rodney's cock was taking notice. Feeling bold--adventurous, even--Rodney began touching, sliding one hand up into Sheppard's hair, envying the thickness of it, the other hand moving over Sheppard's chest and shoulders, all flat, hard muscle and bone, no soft curves, except maybe the curve of Sheppard's cheek when he smiled and pulled Rodney down to lie next to him on the bed.
"Oh," Rodney breathed. "Okay." He could do this.
He stretched out next to Sheppard, and explored Sheppard's neck with his mouth. Warm skin, smelling fresh and shower-clean and, judging from Sheppard's response, very sensitive. Sheppard clutched at Rodney, and it was a total rush, Sheppard wanting him so much, and Rodney wanted Sheppard, wanted to have sex with Sheppard, even though Sheppard was a guy and he was a guy and they both had penises but heck, it probably wasn't at all complicated to get each other off. Rodney was smart, if he could figure out that sucking just beneath the collar of Sheppard's shirt made him moan, he could certainly figure out how to make Sheppard come.
"Control room to Dr. McKay".
Rodney jerked away from Sheppard, and tapped his earpiece. "Uh--McKay here." He winced at the raspy quality of his voice.
Sorry to disturb you, but we seem to be having a slight problem with the DHD this evening.
Sheppard's hand slipped under Rodney's shirt to rest on the naked skin of his stomach.
"Uh, uh, say again?"
The Control Room tech repeated his message.
He was in Sheppard's bed. He was in Sheppard's bed with Sheppard. Sheppard was lying next to him, rumpled and, if the bulge in his trousers was any indication, horny. Sheppard was horny, breathing heavy, cheeks flushed and those lips and he wanted to have sex and he was a guy and so was Rodney and it was weird, weird, weird.
....kind of like a sticky key on the computer, if you catch my drift. Probably nothing serious, but it makes dialing kind of hard...
Rodney sat up, and Sheppard's hand slid away. "I'm, on my way," he said to the tech, and turned his radio off. "Sorry, I need to go take a look at the DHD," Rodney explained, backing away from Sheppard, and trying very hard not to stare at the evidence of Sheppard's erection.
Sheppard expression turned downright sulky, and that was sweet, and a little frightening, too. "Damn it. Anything serious?"
"I don't think so, but," Rodney shrugged.
"Come back when you're done?"
"If, ah, if it's not too late."
"Promise?"
Rodney nodded as he stood, smoothing his clothes--disarrayed from making out. Making out with Sheppard. He had to tuck his cock back down and straighten his briefs. Sheppard watched him, grinning in a way that made Rodney want to dive back down onto the bed and--and--
"Gotta go, okay?" Rodney turned and fled.
***
A DHD with sticky keys, and a science team waiting impatiently down on the floor. Rodney was grateful for the distraction, even going as far as to wave off the apologies of the gate tech. It was a simple repair job--purely mechanical--yet he managed to drag it out for two hours, and then the diagnostics needed to be run. It was nearly three hours before Rodney was finished.
He wrote up his report of the incident immediately afterward.
Finally, out of options, Rodney headed toward Sheppard's room, hesitating when he reached the door. It was late, and he was exhausted. Sheppard was most surely asleep. Rodney had promised him, but if he was asleep, well, he was still recovering from his ordeal, and Rodney really should let him sleep.
It had nothing to do with being coward. Nothing at all.
Rodney turned away.
Of course, it was entirely possible that Sheppard was lying awake and waiting for him. He'd know that Rodney didn't stop by. And Rodney would have to explain why in the morning, when he didn't know why himself. He wasn't sure he knew anything anymore.
Rodney took a deep breath and palmed the control to Sheppard's door.
It slid open to reveal Sheppard stretched out on his bed, sound asleep, thank goodness, a book laying open beside him. The tension drained from Rodney's body. He had gotten a reprieve. Creeping closer, he heard the door slide shut behind him as he moved in to take a good look at Sheppard.
No, not at Sheppard, at John.
The man he had kissed.
John looked young when was asleep, lips parted, chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. Shirt riding up to reveal a pale belly, scattered with dark hairs, and his arm draped over it, so hairy--a guy's arm, a guy's body. It was all strange and new, yet when John kissed him it was John kissing him. Not some guy.
Rodney's brain hurt. Or maybe it was his heart.
Confused, he backed up out of John's room and headed back to his own.
***
After a restless night Rodney woke early and headed straight for the lab, grabbing coffee and a donut from the mess on the way in. He had spent half the night wondering why it felt so good to kiss John. And the other half wondering why it felt so good to have John kiss him.
He was pretty sure another half was spent wondering if he'd like being naked with John.
Maybe about a quarter of the night was dedicated to a "Oh god, I'm gay" panic. Although maybe panic was too strong a word. He couldn't quite summon up the energy for a full-blown panic attack. The best he could do was a mild, confused agitation. Finding out he might be gay was nothing compared to, say, a Wraith attack, or drowning in a jumper thousands of meters below the sea, or being swallowed up by molten lava.
Either way, it all added up to much tossing and turning and very little sleep and when Rodney dragged himself out of bed in the morning the only thing he was sure of was that it was entirely Sheppard's--no, wait, make that John's fault.
The city began to wake after a few hours and fellow scientists wandered into the lab, chattering and arguing and laughing. His peaceful haven disrupted, Rodney escaped to the jumper bay to follow up on repairs and general maintenance.
No, he wasn't avoiding John, because that would be ridiculous.
When he was finished with the jumpers he thought he might as well check the on the MALPs. MALPs were a critical piece of equipment, and expensive at that, so keeping them in working order was very important. But when he rounded the corner there was John, strolling by, and Rodney's heart beat faster at the sight of him.
"Hey, Rodney," John said, sounding nervous and happy and tentative all at the same time.
"You were asleep," Rodney blurted, disconcerted by how much he wanted to kiss John again.
"Oh." John brightened and touched Rodney's arm. "You should have woken me up," he whispered.
"No, you know, with what you went through, you needed to sleep." A group of technicians went by and Rodney drew back sharply.
John was still beaming at him. "Carson said I can go walking now. As long as I don't try to run."
Rodney nodded. "I'm very happy for you, Colonel.'
"Come with me?"
"You mean now?"
"No, Rodney, yesterday." John cocked his head. "Yes, now."
"I was going to..." Rodney pointed down the corridor, because the MALPs, yes, the MALPs might need his help.
"Do it later?"
A walk through the city--very innocuous. "I can do that."
Rodney followed John into the transporter, and they emerged into bright sunshine. "Where are we?" Rodney asked, squinting.
"Just below the main tower. Ronon and I run this way sometimes." John motioned for him to follow. "Although, it's more like Ronon trotting and me running after him. Damn he's fast. You should come with us, though."
"Oh, please, I don't think so," Rodney said, even though he was gratified that John thought to include him. "Unless you just want me there so that someone will be slower than you."
"Nah. Would I do that?"
"Yes."
They walked around the base of the tower, then took a path alongside the water. The air was still, the hot sun soothing. They strolled to the sound of water quietly lapping at the seawall. Rodney breathed in the ocean air and maybe that knot between his shoulders was finally loosening up.
Then John's hand touched the small of his back.
Startled, Rodney came to a halt and hissed, "Careful, someone might see."
"Who?"
Rodney realized they were in a cul-de-sac facing the water, out of view of the entire city. "Um, the whales?"
John grinned and slipped an arm around Rodney's waist. "I keep thinking about you."
Rodney pulled away, startled. "Uh, I'm sorry, this still kind of weirds me out."
John froze, then dropped his hands. "I'm sorry," he said, "I thought--well, last night you seemed to be into it."
"I was. And I am, I just never thought I'd be interested in a man this way," Rodney said, talking fast because he hated the way John's face was closing down, eyes distant as he retreated and damn it, Rodney wanted that attention. He grabbed John's arm as John turned away. "What made you kiss me last night?"
For a moment Rodney thought John was going to pull away. But instead he took a deep breath and said, "Because I thought you were interested in me. In that way."
"You did? Seriously?"
"Yes, I did. What with all the flirting," John said, as if he were stating the obvious.
"Flirting?" Rodney asked. "I've been flirting?"
"Not to mention the cuddling," John added. "Back at that cabin." He tried to free his arm.
Rodney tightened his grip. "You were freezing to death. I was keeping you alive."
"Well, it felt like cuddling to me," John said with a mulish expression. "You could have moved away when the place warmed up. And then you found me in the prison cell and you kissed me. What the hell was I supposed to think?"
"That I like you a lot?" Rodney answered, confused.
"Exactly. But apparently that freaks you out. You're straight. I understand, okay? We can forget it ever happened."
Angry because John had it all wrong, Rodney closed in until they stood nose to nose, close enough that Rodney could see the green flecks in John's ever-changing eyes. He slid his hand up onto John's shoulder and squeezed. "Listen. It doesn't freak me out. Well, maybe it does. A little. It's just--unexpected. I never wanted to kiss another guy, but now I want to kiss you and I don't know why. It doesn't make any sense."
John's expression softened. "Maybe it's not supposed to, Rodney."
"Oh, now see? I hate that."
To his surprise, John grinned.
Even more surprising was how sexy John looked when he grinned. Rodney had no idea why he had never noticed that before, but that grin definitely made him feel warm all over. "Come here," he said, pulling John in for a kiss.
Sun-warmed and willing, John leaned into the kiss, sliding his arms around Rodney with something that might have been a sigh of relief. John's very male body pressed up against his, strange and exciting yet somehow familiar, which also didn't make a whole lot of sense, but then Rodney decided that he didn't care what made sense and what didn't. All that mattered was the sensation of John's mouth on his and how good it felt to be touching John. When Rodney slid his hand under John's shirt he found warm, damp skin, and he spread his fingers out over the small of John's back just to feel more of it. John took it as an invitation to grasp Rodney's hips and push his thigh between Rodney's legs.
"Oh," Rodney breathed, amazed at all the closeness and touching and the ridiculously thrilled expression on John's face. His fingers slipped under the waistband of John's pants, and there, right there, was the curve of John's ass, his for the fondling. "Oh wow."
"Want to go back to my room," John breathed against his ear, "and make even less sense?"
"Um, you mean, like, to have sex?" Which was a very stupid question, considering that John's very erect cock was pushing against his hip.
John nibbled the side of his neck. "Uh huh. If you're comfortable with that." He reached under Rodney's shirt and slid his hand up to find a nipple.
"Just for the record? I can't think when you do that," Rodney said, covering John's hand with his, wanting him both to stop and to keep going.
Someday his life would make sense again.
"Really? You like that?" John slipped a second hand under Rodney's shirt.
Laughing, Rodney pushed both hands way and backed off, followed closely by John, who looked all too pleased with himself. Rodney continued backing away until his back bumped up against the wall.
John rested a hand on either side of Rodney's head and kissed him with a light, feather-touch of a kiss. "Come on, let's go back to my room. We can do as much as you're comfortable with."
Rodney's hand was still flat against the center of John's chest, standing out sharply against the black tee-shirt. He could feel John's heart racing. Racing because of him, because John wanted to have sex with him. Rodney slid his hand lower, over John's stomach and then moved it even lower. After a moment's indecision, he cupped John's erection.
"Rodney," John breathed. His cock twitched, pushing into Rodney's hand.
Fascinated, Rodney pressed down and rubbed his palm against the hard flesh. He was touching another man's cock. Through layers of clothing, granted, but it was a cock, and it was John's, and it was hard. He squeezed, and John let out a little gasp.
Rodney liked it, too.
He figured he might like it even more if they were both naked.
"What do you say we go back to your room?" Rodney asked.
John nodded rapidly. "Good idea. Very good idea."
***
John's room had apparently been relocated to the other side of the city, because it took forever to get there, even with the quick-as-a-blink transporters. They ran into every single damn person in the city, all of whom needed to stop and have a word. Lorne was setting up training exercises, Parrish wanted his equipment back from Simons, the gateroom tech needed to assure Rodney the DHD was working perfectly, and Elizabeth needed to schedule a briefing with the Colonel. By the time John's door closed behind them "Colonel" was ringing in Rodney's ears, along with all the implications of John being a member of the military.
"John, maybe we should--" Rodney started, but before he could finish John spun around and embraced him. He held onto Rodney with a fierce determination, his grip so powerful that the air rushed from Rodney's lungs and the only thing he could do was hold John in return.
"I'm aware of the risks, Rodney. I had a whole hell of a lot of time by myself to think about it." Unlike his grip, John's voice wasn't entirely steady.
"Oh. I just--okay." Of course John knew what he was doing. Rodney tucked his face into John's neck and breathed, wondering just when he had started craving the smell of John's skin. "As long as you're sure about this."
John's hands slid down Rodney's back and onto his ass. "I'm very sure."
Hip to hip with John, and it was very a interesting position--John's cock pushing into his hip, his cock wedged happily between their bodies. When John moved against him everything rubbed in all the right places. Excited, Rodney kissed his way to John's mouth. This was it; they were about to have sex and it really wasn't so strange, it was more like a damn good idea. "Maybe we should take our clothes off?"
John pulled back. "You think?"
"That's how it works with women, so I'm assuming for the homosexual version it's the same, hmmm, yes?" Rodney grinned at John, expecting John's typical eye-roll in response.
But John surprised him by taking hold of his head and kissing him, hard. "Yes, Rodney, it's the same between guys."
Hand to the small of Rodney's back, John pushed him toward the bed, laughing. Rodney sat, bouncing down onto the mattress and watching John kick off his shoes and pull his shirt off over his head, revealing a nice-but-not-overly-muscled chest, wide and hairy with dog tags hanging down. Rodney's breath caught at the sight of the tags. He had always had this little fantasy of Samantha Carter's tags nestled into her cleavage, tucked between soft, rounded breasts and maybe she was wearing one of those lacy bras, and maybe she wasn't wearing anything, but in his mind it was almost unbearably sexy, the way the tags would look against her glowing skin.
He had never imagined that tags would look just as hot bumping against John's hard, hairy chest.
To his disappointment, John slipped the tags off over his head and tossed them onto the bedside table. "You still with me, Rodney?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "I thought we were getting naked."
"You look good," Rodney said, pulling himself out of his reverie. He reached for John, dragging his fingers over warm skin and solid muscle. "You look really good."
John blinked at him, almost uncomprehendingly. "Oh." A small smile. "Oh, well, come on, let me see you, then." He sat next to Rodney and tugged at the hem of Rodney's shirt.
Rodney complied, pulling his shirt off and John gave a little sigh of "oh Rodney," which was utterly sweet, as was the way John touched him, tracing his collarbone with the tip of a finger as if Rodney was something precious and delicate.
Rodney kissed him again, because the sweetness was a surprise, a surprise of the good kind, and it seemed like everything about John was surprising. "What do you like?" he asked, realizing that aside from the naked part, he didn't know what he was doing and he wanted more than anything to do it right. "How do you like to do it?"
"I like, oh, "John made a show of thinking it over. "Hmmm. Let's see. Basically--everything."
"Everything?"
John nodded. "Blow jobs, hand jobs, rubbing--everything. I'd even let you fuck me. I like that."
"That's, um, I think I need to work my way up to that," Rodney said, flustered because maybe that was what John wanted to do and also because John's arm was around him and John was hugging close. All that skin-to-skin contact and, whoa, John liked to be fucked? "You really like that? Being--you know, the receiver? "
"Yes, Rodney, I do." John seemed amused. "I like it a lot. But we can take things one step at a time, okay?"
"Good, good yes. But--oh, that feels good," Rodney said, distracted as John cupped his cock through his pants. John's hand, on the crotch of his pants, rubbing. "How much experience do you have? You've done all that, you know," Rodney waved his hands. "Stuff."
"What do you mean?" John stilled his hand.
"I was just wondering how many guys--boyfriends? Do you call them boyfriends? Rodney asked, feeling entirely out of his depth.
One corner of John's mouth twitched. "I guess a couple of them were boyfriends. All before I joined the military. Since then, not so much." John sighed. "More like none."
"I'm sorry," Rodney said, because it wasn't fair, and it was all he could think to say.
"Oh, I plan on making up for it with you."
A thrill of anticipation ran through Rodney at John's words. John was gazing at him with a hungry, greedy expression, still groping his cock. Everything John had done so far felt damn good and Rodney was definitely ready for action. "I'm all for that. Let's, um--" Rodney reached for the waistband of John's pants. "Get rid of these?"
John hopped out of bed and shucked his pants in an instant, then stood there naked and grinning as if being naked was the most fun thing ever. His cock was big and hard and erect, and Rodney liked how it looked, poking out from between John's thighs, in a forward, friendly kind of way, much like John himself. Rodney reached out to touch it, to take it in his hand, to feel the warm weight of it against his palm. Slippery smooth, skin like silk and when he squeezed it, John gasped.
"Naked," Rodney said. "I like you naked."
"Me, too," John said in a breathless voice. "Your turn?"
Rodney struggled to unfasten his pants, then pulled them off, along with his briefs and his socks and everything, so he could be naked too, naked with John, in John's room, in the middle of the morning with the sunlight streaming in through the window over the bed. The only thing strange about it was that it felt like the most natural thing in the world for them to be doing together and how come it took him so long to discover this?
Then John moved, pushing Rodney down onto the mattress and stretching out over him. Hard naked body, entirely naked and hard, and it was the best thing Rodney had ever felt, especially when John rocked his hips, his cock sliding right up next to his. With a gasp, Rodney grabbed hold of John's ass and John shoved down hard onto him, skin sliding against skin.
"God, I missed this," John said, pushing an arm under Rodney's shoulders and holding him tight, muscles straining as he pressed their bodies together. "I just really, really--god, Rodney, you feel so good."
It was incredible to feel John's strength, the power in his arms. An unexpected turn-on, and Rodney moaned and kissed him, hands digging into John's flesh, holding on tight in return. John seemed to like it, rubbing his cock on Rodney's hip, his kisses growing wet and frantic, lips sliding over Rodney's mouth and onto his neck to suck on his skin. Then John slithered further down, nipping at Rodney's chest and Rodney buried a hand in his hair, squirming and desperately rubbing his cock against John's stomach, because so good--so god damn good, especially against John's slick, sweaty skin.
When John's mouth reached a nipple, he sucked hard, and Rodney moaned again, shoulders curling up off the bed but John pushed him back down and sucked even harder. He licked Rodney's chest, leaving a wet trail on his skin. "Rodney," he said, eyes dark and dazed. "I want to suck you--can I suck you?"
"Oh god yes, what, you think I'd say no?" Rodney watched in awe as John lifted himself and moved down his body, pausing to kiss and nip at his stomach. His cock was so hard it ached, and he couldn't remember the last time sex was like this, frantic and hot.
"Look at you," John said, running his hands over Rodney's hips. The friction heated up Rodney's skin, and he was already unbearably hot, and John was just looking at his cock, and admiring it was all well and good but--but--
"Can you suck now, and look later?" Rodney asked, voice rising up high. John grinned delightedly, as if Rodney had just given him a gift and maybe he had, by wanting John as much as John wanted him. "Please?"
John dipped his head. Rodney moaned out loud at the warm, wet suction all around his cock, such a shock of exquisite pleasure that Rodney thrust up into John's mouth. "Sorry, sorry, sorry," he whispered, because that was rude, so rude, but John chuckled low in his throat and that was fucking amazing, he felt it against his legs and in his cock. Even more amazing were John's arms wrapping around his hips, hugging him close, John's hands gripping his ass as he sucked even harder.
"Oh my god," Rodney moaned. He was held firmly in place. He could barely move and that only made it more exciting, the thrill of it sizzling up and all through his body until his hands twisted in the sheets and he moaned shamelessly. Looking down, he could see John's head bobbing, John's arms around him and then it all was too much and he came, all light and heat as he poured himself out into John's mouth.
And when he was done John didn't release him. He held Rodney's cock in his mouth through the aftershocks, licking delicately until Rodney reached for him, gently touching his cheek. "John, please."
John let him go and then he released his iron grip around Rodney's hips. "Touch me?" he asked, crawling up next to Rodney.
Rodney's hands were already on him, even though he was lightheaded and maybe a little giddy from what might have been the most intense orgasm of his life. John looked so needy, so desperate and so hard, his cock jutting straight out and when Rodney slid his hands down John's body, John moaned, desperate for his touch. "I'm not going to be any good at this," Rodney said, shifting his weight and drawing his legs in underneath. "Not like you because that was the best damn blow-job ever but--"
He knelt next to John's hips and wrapped his fist around the base of John's cock. It was wet at the tip, a glistening drop of precome and after a split-second of hesitation Rodney put his lips to the head and tasted it. Sharp and salty, Rodney found it not exactly pleasant but not awful, either. The smooth, resilient flesh felt odd, unlike anything he'd put his mouth on before. But John's soft little "oh" of astonishment was encouraging, and he wanted to make John feel good, as crazy-good as John made him feel so he licked and tasted again, then closed his mouth over it and slid as far down on the shaft as he could.
John went stock still, so still that Rodney was afraid he had stopped breathing, but when he glanced up he saw John propped up on his arms and watching, mouth slack and hanging open, eyes wide. "That feels really good, Rodney," he said.
Such obvious delight, and Rodney had to fight a grin as he slid his mouth back up and then down again. He decided it would be better directly between John's legs. Crawling over one leg to settle directly between them, he hunkered down. "Ah, much better."
John had spread his legs wide. His balls looked soft and vulnerable. Rodney touched them carefully, cradling them in his hand and John smelled so good, so John that Rodney pushed his nose into the hair and sniffed, thrilled when John let out a whimper. More confident now, he held John's cock steady and licked it, all the way up the underside and then sucked on the head again, trying not to scrape with his teeth as he moved his mouth down and it wasn't exactly easy. He was even more impressed with John's cock-sucking abilities now that he had his mouth wrapped around one.
He ended up licking his palm and fisting the shaft as he sucked only on the rounded, flat head, but John seemed okay with that, making small desperate noises and squirming beneath him, occasionally whispering Rodney's name, telling him how good it felt, asking for faster and harder, and Rodney tried his best to oblige.
Then John pulled his legs up, digging his heels in and moaned low and loud. Rodney knew John was about to come, he could already taste it, but he wasn't exactly sure he could deal with an entire mouthful of the stuff, so when John's hips jerked he pulled back and stroked the full length of the shaft with a saliva-slicked fist.
Two strokes and then John came, come spurting all over his stomach and Rodney's hand. It was fascinating to see, all those muscles twitching and straining, hips lifting powerfully.
He had made John come.
When he finally let go of John's dripping cock, John tugged on his arm. "Come here, come here, Rodney, please--"
Rodney didn't know what to do with his wet, dripping hand, so he not-quite-surreptitiously wiped it on John's stomach as he moved back up the bed. "How was that?" he asked.
John rolled over and into him, heedless of the come on his stomach, smearing it over Rodney as he nestled in close and kissed him.
It was a lush, lingering kiss and Rodney sighed contentedly, interrupting only to pull a pillow under their heads. John draped a leg over his hip and they fit together amazingly well, only maybe Rodney shouldn't have been surprised by that, not at this point.
"Rodney," John said with a sleepy-eyed smile. "You sucked my dick."
"Yes, I did."
"I can't believe you did that. It was amazing." John kissed him again, sliding his hand up and down Rodney's side, petting him.
"I know, wasn't it?" Rodney kissed him, despite his snickering. It was fun to kiss John while he laughed.
Growing serious, John drew back and with an intent gaze, asked. "How are you feeling?"
Rodney thought for a moment. "Kind of sticky."
"Rodney--"
"Okay, okay," Rodney said. "How about--of all my new experiences here in the Pegasus galaxy, this one is, hands down, my absolute favorite?"
A sly look. "I'll bet you say that to all the boys."
"Only the pretty ones."
John laughed and pulled Rodney closer. "So, we're good?" he asked, pressing his forehead against Rodney's.
Utterly endearing, and Rodney's heart lurched. "We're good. We're very good."
"Good."
"And you know what? I think I might be gay."
"No, really?" John's eyes went wide with mock astonishment. Rodney nodded gravely, and that earned him another slow, sweet kiss. "See, you never know what you'll discover out here in the Pegasus galaxy."
"You're absolutely right. " And John had been the best discovery of all.
"Stay for a while?"
Suddenly aware of his lack of sleep, Rodney yawned. "To be honest? You may never get me out of this bed."
"I was kind of hoping for that," John said.
His voice was earnest, maybe a little shy and it took Rodney's post-coital mind a moment to process. "Oh. Oh. Well, yes, of course."
John tucked his face into Rodney's neck. "Good. You're where you belong." He slung an arm around Rodney's waist, and Rodney's arm instinctively slid around John's shoulders.
John was right. This was exactly where he belonged, even if it was the last place he ever expected to find himself.
***
"No, no, no, that's wrong, the level's too high, it's not going to work," Rodney said. Adding, when Radek didn’t answer, "You're ignoring me, aren't you?"
"Yes, I am ignoring you."
"You're going to burn out the main power conduit."
Radek flipped the switch. The instrument lit up, and hummed along happily, and the jumper's power reading remained in the normal range.
"Or, maybe not," Rodney admitted.
"You're going off-world soon, correct?" Radek asked, peering at Rodney over the top of his glasses.
"Yes, we are," Sheppard said, from the open door of the jumper. "Tomorrow."
"Colonel," Rodney exclaimed, his heart leaping, which was utterly ridiculous since it had only been six hours since John had climbed out of his bed. "Radek, the Colonel and I have a meeting, it's very important and--"
"Go, go, please. I'll have this ready in time for tomorrow's survey mission."
Rodney patted Radek's shoulder, and hurried off.
"So, are you all set for more action and adventure?" John asked as they left the jumper bay.
"Um," Rodney leaned close and whispered, "are you talking about tomorrow's mission, or our upcoming 'meeting'?"
A broad smile. "Both," John whispered back.
"Ready and willing. I've become quite the intrepid explorer, hmmm?" Rodney hesitated, and checked the hallway to make certain they were entirely alone before adding, "Can I be on the bottom this time?"
John's face lit up. "Really?"
"Yes, really."
He laughed as John hustled him into the transporter.
Fandom: SGA
Pairing: John/Rodney
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Rodney was exactly where he belonged. It was the last place he ever expected to find himself.
Notes: A big squishy hug to mmmchelle, who bravely encouraged me through another long fic. Thank you sweetie, for the betaing and the feedback and the hand-holding. And a special thank you to reedfem, who knows all kinds of cool things about guns weapons and how to fire them. She's fabulous.
Unanticipated Outcomes, Part II
***
"Well, where is it?" Rodney asked as Ronon stalked along the rock wall. "I'm not getting any energy readings. Are you sure it's even here?"
Ronon ignored him. Spreading hands over the stone, he pressed down.
One door-sized section of the stone slid away, revealing a dimly lit interior.
"Oh. Nice going." Eager and impatient, Rodney tried to go through but Lorne held up a hand, stopping him. "Fine, fine." Rodney hung back allowing Lorne's team to go through first.
"Clear," Lorne announced a moment later.
"Okay, if the Wraith had come here," asked Rodney as he stepped into the large open room, "why aren't there people hiding in these tunnels?" He looked around the room--smooth, featureless walls, lighted with glowing tubes along the ceiling--not quite up to the level of Ancient technology, but definitely not primitive, either.
"It goes a lot further back," Ronon answered. "See, that back corridor branches out."
But Rodney wasn't listening. "Hey, hey, hey," he said, sweeping his arms around. "The walls--this kind of stone, it's the same as in the vid with Sheppard."
Ronon looked. "They're just blank walls."
"Exactly." Rodney couldn't figure out why no one else got it. "Sheppard has to be here. The walls, the level of lighting--"
Teyla was nodding. "Assuming they haven't moved him. It's possible."
"Let's split up and do a sweep," Lorne ordered.
Rodney pulled out his life signs detector. It lit up, little round dots representing the search team, but then the image wavered and blinked out. "What the hell?" He left the room, stepping back out into the sunshine, and the device reactivated.
"What is it?" Lorne asked.
"Crap. There's something in the stone that interferes with the detector," Rodney told them. "Just to make things even more difficult. God damn it."
"Then we will search every room," Teyla said. "No matter how many rooms are here." She spoke with quiet determination.
Rodney chose the center corridor. Empty rooms on either side, each checked carefully but they yielded nothing, no sign of recent habitation, no furniture, no devices, floors swept clean. Maybe a little too clean, which might mean something, or it might not. Or maybe he was simply clinging to the desperate hope that this was the right place, because those walls were the same, even though there were probably a billion plain flat walls in the galaxy.
A half hour later Rodney was deeper into the mountainside, still trying to convince himself he was right. He couldn't take another search like this.
He was sure something inside him would break if they had to return to Atlantis empty-handed.
Again.
He glanced down at the biosign detector, trying to catch a reading as the image flickered in and out. No signs other than himself, everyone was out of range, spread out in the mazelike tunnels. He had been listening to the team checking in on the open channel, but their voices were now fading into senseless static. Any other time Rodney would have been curious as to what in the stone was causing the interference, but now it was just another hindrance.
The detector flickered again.
A round dot flashed in the upper left quadrant.
Rodney stopped in his tracks, staring at it. But the detector remained dark.
"Damn it," Rodney growled, slapping the detector. "Come on, come on, light up for me."
When the detector refused, Rodney took off down the corridor, running, and yes, there was another passageway off to the left. As he turned, it occurred to him that the dot may not necessarily be a friendly, so he tucked the detector away and pulled his sidearm from the holster. A turn to the right, and another empty corridor stretched out before him. Panting, Rodney held his gun up, arm trembling slightly, and he tried to remember everything Sheppard had taught him, straightening his shoulders, steadying his arm as he crept forward.
The first room to the right was empty.
And the second, too.
Then he saw the door.
A simply made door with a heavy bolt and a slot on the bottom, the kind of slot you might use to slide a tray of foot though.
Rodney rushed to the door, raised himself on his tiptoes and peered through the small window.
"Oh, god," he breathed. "John."
Sheppard was on the floor, curled up tightly, so still that for one awful moment Rodney thought he was dead. Then he saw that Sheppard's chest rise as he took a breath.
"Sheppard," Rodney said. "Hey--" He tapped his radio frantically. "Sheppard, I found Sheppard," he said, holstering his gun before tugging at the large crossbolt and pulling the door open.
He bounded into the room. Sheppard opened his eyes, his body uncurling. "Rodney?" he whispered in a rusty, unused voice.
Rodney could hear the wonder and the uncertainty in it, and god, how long had Sheppard been in there, abandoned to die? He knelt and slid an arm around Sheppard's body, raising him up. Sheppard stank of sweat and piss, and his arm was shaky as he grabbed onto Rodney's tac vest. "Rodney?"
"Yes, yes, yes, oh, thank god." Rodney helped Sheppard sit up, bracing him with an arm around his shoulders and then Rodney got something in his eye--both eyes--and he had to blink rapidly to clear his vision.
"Hey," Sheppard said.
"Yeah, um," Rodney said, pressing his face into Sheppard's matted hair. "Hey."
Sheppard raised his head. Rodney's lips brushed against his temple, almost like a kiss. He lingered there, so happy he couldn't speak, so thankful to be able to touch Sheppard, to feel his warm body. His warm, living, breathing body. Sheppard leaned against him, a hand twisting in the sleeve of Rodney's jacket and Rodney thought he could sit with Sheppard forever and be perfectly content.
A burst of radio chatter brought Rodney around.
"Yes, yes, the Colonel, I have the Colonel," Rodney responded.
Sheppard roused himself. "Water?"
"Oh god, yes, I should have thought--stupid of me--" Rodney babbled as he awkwardly reached for his bottle with one hand and unscrewed the cap. Sheppard grabbed for it and Rodney had to hold it steady as Sheppard drank, throat moving convulsively as he swallowed. "Whoa, careful, not too much."
Sheppard coughed and Rodney pulled the bottle away. For a moment Rodney thought Sheppard was going to lose it and he didn't even care if Sheppard vomited all over him. "Okay?" Rodney asked when Sheppard relaxed against him.
"More."
Rodney held the bottle for him again while he drank. Sheppard looked like hell, face bruised and haggard, and the hand on Rodney's arm was unsteady and suddenly Rodney was furious. He hoped to hell that the Wraith had gotten hold of the kidnappers and sucked the life out of every last one of them.
The sound of running footsteps drifted in from the hall, and Rodney glanced up to find Ronon and Teyla at the door. "Colonel Sheppard," Teyla exclaimed.
"What took you guys so long?" Sheppard said. His voice was weak but they all grinned at each other.
Rodney's world righted itself.
Then it was chaos all around, with Lorne and the rest of the search team crowding into the small cell, helping Sheppard up, trying to radio the Daedalus and the team waiting with the nearby jumper. "Can you walk, sir?" Lorne was asking as Sheppard rose unsteadily to his feet.
"I can carry him," Ronon said.
"I'm fine, I'm fine." Sheppard still clung to Rodney, a hand fisted in his jacket. "I can walk to the jumper, damn it."
"If Ronon feels it is necessary to carry you, then he will carry you," Teyla said sharply.
Sheppard blinked. "Yes, ma'am."
"I'd listen to her if I were you," Ronon said.
"However we do it, let's get the hell out of here before we have company, okay?" Lorne hustled them out of the room.
Sheppard was determined to walk, supported by both Rodney and Ronon. They ended up half-dragging him down the corridors, and finally they were safe inside the jumper and heading for the gate.
It was only after the medical team greeted them and Carson shooed Rodney away that Sheppard released his grip on Rodney's jacket.
***
Exhausted, Rodney went back to his room and showered. Such a rush of emotion to find Sheppard, and now he felt drained of all energy and emotion. All he could think of was way Sheppard reached for him; he couldn't get it out of his mind, Sheppard reaching for him, whispering his name in wonder, and Rodney's throat grew tight as he turned his head into the spray.
Rodney was sure he wouldn't have survived such an ordeal, locked up and alone, waiting to die, waiting for rescue, waiting helplessly for something, anything.
But now it was over, Sheppard was going to be okay, as soon as he got some sleep.
When Rodney sprawled face down on his bed, eyes closed, nothing happened. He didn't drift off. Instead his mind raced, replaying the moment when he peered into that heavy wooden door again and again. If he hadn't gone down that hallway, if he hadn't kept his eyes on the flickering life signs detector, he would have missed it and maybe they would have left that planet without ever finding Sheppard, leaving him to die alone.
Which was ridiculous, because they would have checked every single room, as Teyla had said.
Rodney flipped onto his back and stared at the ceiling. Sheppard was safe, he reminded himself, tucked away in the infirmary.
Alone, perhaps, much like he had been in that cell.
Punching his pillow, Rodney rearranged his blankets, pulling them up under his chin, and determinedly closed his eyes.
Sheppard was probably asleep, anyway.
A moment later Rodney got up, threw on some clothes and headed to the transport.
The infirmary was quiet, lights dimmed for sleeping. Rodney nodded to the nurse on duty as he strolled in, and she didn't stop him. As he made his way to the curtained-off area where Sheppard lay, he could see a small figure sitting in the chair beside the bed.
Teyla rose to her feet and acknowledged Rodney with a tilt of her head as he approached. "He has been sleeping," she said in a whisper. "Although he is very restless."
"That's certainly understandable," Rodney whispered back. Face bearded, hair flat and greasy, Sheppard looked pale and sickly against the white sheets. Yet the sight comforted Rodney.
"And now I believe it is time for me to rest."
Rodney turned to her. "Yes, go on, I'll take over from here."
She flashed a lovely smile at him as she left, and Rodney found himself smiling back.
Sheppard was back, Sheppard was fine, and everything was going to be okay.
For the time being.
Rodney settled into the chair, arms crossed over his chest, and watched. At first Sheppard slept soundly, but after a time he grunted in his sleep, then twitched. He made another noise then jerked his head and opened his eyes, blinking wildly.
"Hey," Rodney whispered, leaning over Sheppard and placing a hand gently on his shoulder.
Sheppard's eyes focused. "Rodney?" he said. His lips curved with a hint of a smile. "Hi."
"Hi, yourself. How are you feeling?" Stupid question, but it was all he could come up with, especially since Sheppard looked happy to see him.
"Okay. Tired. Had a weird dream," Sheppard explained with a frown.
Sheppard was groggy and out of it, understandably so. "Yeah, well, go back to sleep now," Rodney told him, patting his shoulder. "I should go."
Sheppard's eyes widened. "No, wait--"
"Hmm?"
Hesitant, Sheppard asked, "Talk to me?"
"Oh," Rodney said. "I can do that. Um, what about?"
"Anything exciting happen while I was gone?"
Rodney dragged the chair closer. "Okay, let's see--turns out Radek was right about it not being the gamma rays that affected the MALP readings, but we still don't know what the problem is, so he wasn't entirely right, or entirely reasonable, either, mind you. Um, oh--you'll like this--Elizabeth found some information in the database on the personal shields."
"Really? Cool."
"We haven't deciphered all of the technical information, so I don't know if it's worth recommending to her that we pursue the technology," Rodney warned.
"I'll put in a good word," Sheppard whispered, as if it were some great conspiracy between them.
"I'm sure you will." Rodney grinned. Even though he thought the technology was a wash, he was happy to see the haunted look had left Sheppard's eyes. "What else? Let's see...oh, it seems that Lt. Cadman...."
As Rodney filled Sheppard in on the gossip, Sheppard's eyes flickered shut and his breathing grew steady once again. Rodney stopped talking and simply sat, not thinking about anything, and watched Sheppard sleep.
***
A few days later Rodney found Sheppard in his room.
"Rodney, come in, come on in." Sheppard sat up in his rumpled bed and waved Rodney over. Freshly showered and shaved, dressed in running pants and a tee-shirt, Sheppard looked much more like himself. Even with the bruise marking his forehead and the shadowed circles under his eyes.
"So, Carson set you free?" Rodney said.
Sheppard nodded. "As long as I take it easy. And it looks like Team Sheppard is going to have at least two weeks of downtime. Again. Sorry."
"Right, Colonel, you should definitely apologize for being taken prisoner, and nearly starving to death."
"Dehydration," Sheppard pointed out. "That would have killed me first."
Rodney felt a sudden chill. "Can we not talk about that?"
"Why? You saved me, Rodney." Sheppard's voice was remarkably warm. "Again."
"Yes, well, no, it was a team effort, but yes, and I'm getting tired of it. It's all very--" Rodney sat on the bed next to him and sighed. "Stressful."
And it was. He felt exhausted. Sleep deprived and punchy, his emotions stretched thin and he was pretty sure the knot between his shoulders was there to stay. For no reason at all he flashed back to being in an primitive, thatched-roof cottage, wind howling all around, huddled under a warm blanket with Sheppard.
Safe.
"Okay," Sheppard was saying. "Next couple of situations that arise, I'll rescue you."
"Good. See that you do."
Sheppard watched him, amused, but there was something else in with the amusement, something a little more thoughtful than his usual manner. "Rodney," he said, then hesitated.
"What?" Rodney grew concerned when Sheppard didn't answer immediately. "What is it?"
"When I was in that cell, when I looked up and saw you there, in the doorway--" Sheppard shifted, pulling his legs in and moving closer to Rodney. "It was nice, it was really, really nice."
Rodney frowned, certain that he was missing something, with the way Sheppard was speaking, slow and deliberate. Of course it was nice to be rescued from a dark, stinky cell, one that you were about die in. "I was pretty damn happy to see you there, too."
"You kissed me." Sheppard seemed oddly hopeful.
"Oh, right. That." Rodney's cheeks grew warm and he cast his eyes down at his hands. "I was kind of hoping you wouldn't remember that bit, you know with the being half-conscious and all."
"No, no, no, it's okay, really, Rodney."
A warm hand on Rodney's shoulder, and when Rodney looked up, Sheppard leaned in and kissed him.
On the lips.
Sheppard's lips, touching his lips.
Sheppard was kissing him.
Sheppard was apparently under the mistaken impression that Rodney had kissed him kissed him, when really all Rodney had done was hold his head and while perhaps his lips accidentally bumped against Sheppard's forehead, Rodney didn't really kiss guys, not like that. He wanted to explain the 'not kissing guys' thing to Sheppard but he couldn't talk because Sheppard kept pressing small, tentative kisses to his lips and whoa, wait a minute--Sheppard, gay?
For a guy, Sheppard's kisses were nice, and Rodney found himself leaning in and kissing Sheppard in return. Interesting thing was, Sheppard's lips were as soft as they looked, and it had been way too long since Rodney had kissed anyone. He liked kissing; he liked being close to Sheppard; he had missed Sheppard so god damn much and there was something sweetly intimate about the way Sheppard's breath puffed against his face. When Rodney slid his hand up onto Sheppard's neck, fingertips brushing against warm vulnerable skin, it was possible that they both sighed.
"I'm not gay," Rodney explained as soon as Sheppard pulled back.
Sheppard licked his lips. "Are you sure?"
"I think so." Rodney frowned, perplexed. "I mean, maybe. I didn't used to be."
Sheppard pointed a finger at him. "You didn't used to be into adventure and danger, either."
"I know I didn't, but I do, sometimes, but--but--" Rodney flailed, because he had no more words. He was all used up, with the worrying and searching and rescuing, and he really didn't like danger, no, not really, or worrying, especially worrying about Sheppard, and he had always been sure he knew exactly who he was and who he wanted to kiss. Yet with Sheppard right there in his face, earnest and sincere and handsome like the great big hero that he was, and Sheppard had scared the hell out of him by being gone for so long, and Rodney's brain was spinning right out of his head and nothing made sense and what the hell was he supposed to do now?
"Do you want to kiss some more?" Sheppard asked. "Just to be sure?"
"Okay".
Sheppard's lips met his again, and this time his fingers cupped the side of Rodney's face with a surprisingly delicate touch. When Sheppard pulled back his fingers lingered on Rodney's cheek, eyes bright with hope and yearning, like nothing Rodney had ever seen before, and so this time he kissed Sheppard, wrapping a hand around the back of his neck. It was kind of cool, because Sheppard breathed in sharply and made a little noise and then it got even cooler--no, no, make that hotwhen Sheppard's lips parted and Rodney touched his tongue to Sheppard's.
He was making out with Sheppard.
Eventually Rodney had to break off the kiss so he could breathe, his heart beating so fast that he was growing lightheaded. Sheppard used the opportunity to kiss Rodney's jaw and to nuzzle his ear, which sent shivery sensations all through Rodney's body. By the time Sheppard found his way to Rodney's neck, sucking and kissing, Rodney's cock was taking notice. Feeling bold--adventurous, even--Rodney began touching, sliding one hand up into Sheppard's hair, envying the thickness of it, the other hand moving over Sheppard's chest and shoulders, all flat, hard muscle and bone, no soft curves, except maybe the curve of Sheppard's cheek when he smiled and pulled Rodney down to lie next to him on the bed.
"Oh," Rodney breathed. "Okay." He could do this.
He stretched out next to Sheppard, and explored Sheppard's neck with his mouth. Warm skin, smelling fresh and shower-clean and, judging from Sheppard's response, very sensitive. Sheppard clutched at Rodney, and it was a total rush, Sheppard wanting him so much, and Rodney wanted Sheppard, wanted to have sex with Sheppard, even though Sheppard was a guy and he was a guy and they both had penises but heck, it probably wasn't at all complicated to get each other off. Rodney was smart, if he could figure out that sucking just beneath the collar of Sheppard's shirt made him moan, he could certainly figure out how to make Sheppard come.
"Control room to Dr. McKay".
Rodney jerked away from Sheppard, and tapped his earpiece. "Uh--McKay here." He winced at the raspy quality of his voice.
Sorry to disturb you, but we seem to be having a slight problem with the DHD this evening.
Sheppard's hand slipped under Rodney's shirt to rest on the naked skin of his stomach.
"Uh, uh, say again?"
The Control Room tech repeated his message.
He was in Sheppard's bed. He was in Sheppard's bed with Sheppard. Sheppard was lying next to him, rumpled and, if the bulge in his trousers was any indication, horny. Sheppard was horny, breathing heavy, cheeks flushed and those lips and he wanted to have sex and he was a guy and so was Rodney and it was weird, weird, weird.
....kind of like a sticky key on the computer, if you catch my drift. Probably nothing serious, but it makes dialing kind of hard...
Rodney sat up, and Sheppard's hand slid away. "I'm, on my way," he said to the tech, and turned his radio off. "Sorry, I need to go take a look at the DHD," Rodney explained, backing away from Sheppard, and trying very hard not to stare at the evidence of Sheppard's erection.
Sheppard expression turned downright sulky, and that was sweet, and a little frightening, too. "Damn it. Anything serious?"
"I don't think so, but," Rodney shrugged.
"Come back when you're done?"
"If, ah, if it's not too late."
"Promise?"
Rodney nodded as he stood, smoothing his clothes--disarrayed from making out. Making out with Sheppard. He had to tuck his cock back down and straighten his briefs. Sheppard watched him, grinning in a way that made Rodney want to dive back down onto the bed and--and--
"Gotta go, okay?" Rodney turned and fled.
***
A DHD with sticky keys, and a science team waiting impatiently down on the floor. Rodney was grateful for the distraction, even going as far as to wave off the apologies of the gate tech. It was a simple repair job--purely mechanical--yet he managed to drag it out for two hours, and then the diagnostics needed to be run. It was nearly three hours before Rodney was finished.
He wrote up his report of the incident immediately afterward.
Finally, out of options, Rodney headed toward Sheppard's room, hesitating when he reached the door. It was late, and he was exhausted. Sheppard was most surely asleep. Rodney had promised him, but if he was asleep, well, he was still recovering from his ordeal, and Rodney really should let him sleep.
It had nothing to do with being coward. Nothing at all.
Rodney turned away.
Of course, it was entirely possible that Sheppard was lying awake and waiting for him. He'd know that Rodney didn't stop by. And Rodney would have to explain why in the morning, when he didn't know why himself. He wasn't sure he knew anything anymore.
Rodney took a deep breath and palmed the control to Sheppard's door.
It slid open to reveal Sheppard stretched out on his bed, sound asleep, thank goodness, a book laying open beside him. The tension drained from Rodney's body. He had gotten a reprieve. Creeping closer, he heard the door slide shut behind him as he moved in to take a good look at Sheppard.
No, not at Sheppard, at John.
The man he had kissed.
John looked young when was asleep, lips parted, chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. Shirt riding up to reveal a pale belly, scattered with dark hairs, and his arm draped over it, so hairy--a guy's arm, a guy's body. It was all strange and new, yet when John kissed him it was John kissing him. Not some guy.
Rodney's brain hurt. Or maybe it was his heart.
Confused, he backed up out of John's room and headed back to his own.
***
After a restless night Rodney woke early and headed straight for the lab, grabbing coffee and a donut from the mess on the way in. He had spent half the night wondering why it felt so good to kiss John. And the other half wondering why it felt so good to have John kiss him.
He was pretty sure another half was spent wondering if he'd like being naked with John.
Maybe about a quarter of the night was dedicated to a "Oh god, I'm gay" panic. Although maybe panic was too strong a word. He couldn't quite summon up the energy for a full-blown panic attack. The best he could do was a mild, confused agitation. Finding out he might be gay was nothing compared to, say, a Wraith attack, or drowning in a jumper thousands of meters below the sea, or being swallowed up by molten lava.
Either way, it all added up to much tossing and turning and very little sleep and when Rodney dragged himself out of bed in the morning the only thing he was sure of was that it was entirely Sheppard's--no, wait, make that John's fault.
The city began to wake after a few hours and fellow scientists wandered into the lab, chattering and arguing and laughing. His peaceful haven disrupted, Rodney escaped to the jumper bay to follow up on repairs and general maintenance.
No, he wasn't avoiding John, because that would be ridiculous.
When he was finished with the jumpers he thought he might as well check the on the MALPs. MALPs were a critical piece of equipment, and expensive at that, so keeping them in working order was very important. But when he rounded the corner there was John, strolling by, and Rodney's heart beat faster at the sight of him.
"Hey, Rodney," John said, sounding nervous and happy and tentative all at the same time.
"You were asleep," Rodney blurted, disconcerted by how much he wanted to kiss John again.
"Oh." John brightened and touched Rodney's arm. "You should have woken me up," he whispered.
"No, you know, with what you went through, you needed to sleep." A group of technicians went by and Rodney drew back sharply.
John was still beaming at him. "Carson said I can go walking now. As long as I don't try to run."
Rodney nodded. "I'm very happy for you, Colonel.'
"Come with me?"
"You mean now?"
"No, Rodney, yesterday." John cocked his head. "Yes, now."
"I was going to..." Rodney pointed down the corridor, because the MALPs, yes, the MALPs might need his help.
"Do it later?"
A walk through the city--very innocuous. "I can do that."
Rodney followed John into the transporter, and they emerged into bright sunshine. "Where are we?" Rodney asked, squinting.
"Just below the main tower. Ronon and I run this way sometimes." John motioned for him to follow. "Although, it's more like Ronon trotting and me running after him. Damn he's fast. You should come with us, though."
"Oh, please, I don't think so," Rodney said, even though he was gratified that John thought to include him. "Unless you just want me there so that someone will be slower than you."
"Nah. Would I do that?"
"Yes."
They walked around the base of the tower, then took a path alongside the water. The air was still, the hot sun soothing. They strolled to the sound of water quietly lapping at the seawall. Rodney breathed in the ocean air and maybe that knot between his shoulders was finally loosening up.
Then John's hand touched the small of his back.
Startled, Rodney came to a halt and hissed, "Careful, someone might see."
"Who?"
Rodney realized they were in a cul-de-sac facing the water, out of view of the entire city. "Um, the whales?"
John grinned and slipped an arm around Rodney's waist. "I keep thinking about you."
Rodney pulled away, startled. "Uh, I'm sorry, this still kind of weirds me out."
John froze, then dropped his hands. "I'm sorry," he said, "I thought--well, last night you seemed to be into it."
"I was. And I am, I just never thought I'd be interested in a man this way," Rodney said, talking fast because he hated the way John's face was closing down, eyes distant as he retreated and damn it, Rodney wanted that attention. He grabbed John's arm as John turned away. "What made you kiss me last night?"
For a moment Rodney thought John was going to pull away. But instead he took a deep breath and said, "Because I thought you were interested in me. In that way."
"You did? Seriously?"
"Yes, I did. What with all the flirting," John said, as if he were stating the obvious.
"Flirting?" Rodney asked. "I've been flirting?"
"Not to mention the cuddling," John added. "Back at that cabin." He tried to free his arm.
Rodney tightened his grip. "You were freezing to death. I was keeping you alive."
"Well, it felt like cuddling to me," John said with a mulish expression. "You could have moved away when the place warmed up. And then you found me in the prison cell and you kissed me. What the hell was I supposed to think?"
"That I like you a lot?" Rodney answered, confused.
"Exactly. But apparently that freaks you out. You're straight. I understand, okay? We can forget it ever happened."
Angry because John had it all wrong, Rodney closed in until they stood nose to nose, close enough that Rodney could see the green flecks in John's ever-changing eyes. He slid his hand up onto John's shoulder and squeezed. "Listen. It doesn't freak me out. Well, maybe it does. A little. It's just--unexpected. I never wanted to kiss another guy, but now I want to kiss you and I don't know why. It doesn't make any sense."
John's expression softened. "Maybe it's not supposed to, Rodney."
"Oh, now see? I hate that."
To his surprise, John grinned.
Even more surprising was how sexy John looked when he grinned. Rodney had no idea why he had never noticed that before, but that grin definitely made him feel warm all over. "Come here," he said, pulling John in for a kiss.
Sun-warmed and willing, John leaned into the kiss, sliding his arms around Rodney with something that might have been a sigh of relief. John's very male body pressed up against his, strange and exciting yet somehow familiar, which also didn't make a whole lot of sense, but then Rodney decided that he didn't care what made sense and what didn't. All that mattered was the sensation of John's mouth on his and how good it felt to be touching John. When Rodney slid his hand under John's shirt he found warm, damp skin, and he spread his fingers out over the small of John's back just to feel more of it. John took it as an invitation to grasp Rodney's hips and push his thigh between Rodney's legs.
"Oh," Rodney breathed, amazed at all the closeness and touching and the ridiculously thrilled expression on John's face. His fingers slipped under the waistband of John's pants, and there, right there, was the curve of John's ass, his for the fondling. "Oh wow."
"Want to go back to my room," John breathed against his ear, "and make even less sense?"
"Um, you mean, like, to have sex?" Which was a very stupid question, considering that John's very erect cock was pushing against his hip.
John nibbled the side of his neck. "Uh huh. If you're comfortable with that." He reached under Rodney's shirt and slid his hand up to find a nipple.
"Just for the record? I can't think when you do that," Rodney said, covering John's hand with his, wanting him both to stop and to keep going.
Someday his life would make sense again.
"Really? You like that?" John slipped a second hand under Rodney's shirt.
Laughing, Rodney pushed both hands way and backed off, followed closely by John, who looked all too pleased with himself. Rodney continued backing away until his back bumped up against the wall.
John rested a hand on either side of Rodney's head and kissed him with a light, feather-touch of a kiss. "Come on, let's go back to my room. We can do as much as you're comfortable with."
Rodney's hand was still flat against the center of John's chest, standing out sharply against the black tee-shirt. He could feel John's heart racing. Racing because of him, because John wanted to have sex with him. Rodney slid his hand lower, over John's stomach and then moved it even lower. After a moment's indecision, he cupped John's erection.
"Rodney," John breathed. His cock twitched, pushing into Rodney's hand.
Fascinated, Rodney pressed down and rubbed his palm against the hard flesh. He was touching another man's cock. Through layers of clothing, granted, but it was a cock, and it was John's, and it was hard. He squeezed, and John let out a little gasp.
Rodney liked it, too.
He figured he might like it even more if they were both naked.
"What do you say we go back to your room?" Rodney asked.
John nodded rapidly. "Good idea. Very good idea."
***
John's room had apparently been relocated to the other side of the city, because it took forever to get there, even with the quick-as-a-blink transporters. They ran into every single damn person in the city, all of whom needed to stop and have a word. Lorne was setting up training exercises, Parrish wanted his equipment back from Simons, the gateroom tech needed to assure Rodney the DHD was working perfectly, and Elizabeth needed to schedule a briefing with the Colonel. By the time John's door closed behind them "Colonel" was ringing in Rodney's ears, along with all the implications of John being a member of the military.
"John, maybe we should--" Rodney started, but before he could finish John spun around and embraced him. He held onto Rodney with a fierce determination, his grip so powerful that the air rushed from Rodney's lungs and the only thing he could do was hold John in return.
"I'm aware of the risks, Rodney. I had a whole hell of a lot of time by myself to think about it." Unlike his grip, John's voice wasn't entirely steady.
"Oh. I just--okay." Of course John knew what he was doing. Rodney tucked his face into John's neck and breathed, wondering just when he had started craving the smell of John's skin. "As long as you're sure about this."
John's hands slid down Rodney's back and onto his ass. "I'm very sure."
Hip to hip with John, and it was very a interesting position--John's cock pushing into his hip, his cock wedged happily between their bodies. When John moved against him everything rubbed in all the right places. Excited, Rodney kissed his way to John's mouth. This was it; they were about to have sex and it really wasn't so strange, it was more like a damn good idea. "Maybe we should take our clothes off?"
John pulled back. "You think?"
"That's how it works with women, so I'm assuming for the homosexual version it's the same, hmmm, yes?" Rodney grinned at John, expecting John's typical eye-roll in response.
But John surprised him by taking hold of his head and kissing him, hard. "Yes, Rodney, it's the same between guys."
Hand to the small of Rodney's back, John pushed him toward the bed, laughing. Rodney sat, bouncing down onto the mattress and watching John kick off his shoes and pull his shirt off over his head, revealing a nice-but-not-overly-muscled chest, wide and hairy with dog tags hanging down. Rodney's breath caught at the sight of the tags. He had always had this little fantasy of Samantha Carter's tags nestled into her cleavage, tucked between soft, rounded breasts and maybe she was wearing one of those lacy bras, and maybe she wasn't wearing anything, but in his mind it was almost unbearably sexy, the way the tags would look against her glowing skin.
He had never imagined that tags would look just as hot bumping against John's hard, hairy chest.
To his disappointment, John slipped the tags off over his head and tossed them onto the bedside table. "You still with me, Rodney?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "I thought we were getting naked."
"You look good," Rodney said, pulling himself out of his reverie. He reached for John, dragging his fingers over warm skin and solid muscle. "You look really good."
John blinked at him, almost uncomprehendingly. "Oh." A small smile. "Oh, well, come on, let me see you, then." He sat next to Rodney and tugged at the hem of Rodney's shirt.
Rodney complied, pulling his shirt off and John gave a little sigh of "oh Rodney," which was utterly sweet, as was the way John touched him, tracing his collarbone with the tip of a finger as if Rodney was something precious and delicate.
Rodney kissed him again, because the sweetness was a surprise, a surprise of the good kind, and it seemed like everything about John was surprising. "What do you like?" he asked, realizing that aside from the naked part, he didn't know what he was doing and he wanted more than anything to do it right. "How do you like to do it?"
"I like, oh, "John made a show of thinking it over. "Hmmm. Let's see. Basically--everything."
"Everything?"
John nodded. "Blow jobs, hand jobs, rubbing--everything. I'd even let you fuck me. I like that."
"That's, um, I think I need to work my way up to that," Rodney said, flustered because maybe that was what John wanted to do and also because John's arm was around him and John was hugging close. All that skin-to-skin contact and, whoa, John liked to be fucked? "You really like that? Being--you know, the receiver? "
"Yes, Rodney, I do." John seemed amused. "I like it a lot. But we can take things one step at a time, okay?"
"Good, good yes. But--oh, that feels good," Rodney said, distracted as John cupped his cock through his pants. John's hand, on the crotch of his pants, rubbing. "How much experience do you have? You've done all that, you know," Rodney waved his hands. "Stuff."
"What do you mean?" John stilled his hand.
"I was just wondering how many guys--boyfriends? Do you call them boyfriends? Rodney asked, feeling entirely out of his depth.
One corner of John's mouth twitched. "I guess a couple of them were boyfriends. All before I joined the military. Since then, not so much." John sighed. "More like none."
"I'm sorry," Rodney said, because it wasn't fair, and it was all he could think to say.
"Oh, I plan on making up for it with you."
A thrill of anticipation ran through Rodney at John's words. John was gazing at him with a hungry, greedy expression, still groping his cock. Everything John had done so far felt damn good and Rodney was definitely ready for action. "I'm all for that. Let's, um--" Rodney reached for the waistband of John's pants. "Get rid of these?"
John hopped out of bed and shucked his pants in an instant, then stood there naked and grinning as if being naked was the most fun thing ever. His cock was big and hard and erect, and Rodney liked how it looked, poking out from between John's thighs, in a forward, friendly kind of way, much like John himself. Rodney reached out to touch it, to take it in his hand, to feel the warm weight of it against his palm. Slippery smooth, skin like silk and when he squeezed it, John gasped.
"Naked," Rodney said. "I like you naked."
"Me, too," John said in a breathless voice. "Your turn?"
Rodney struggled to unfasten his pants, then pulled them off, along with his briefs and his socks and everything, so he could be naked too, naked with John, in John's room, in the middle of the morning with the sunlight streaming in through the window over the bed. The only thing strange about it was that it felt like the most natural thing in the world for them to be doing together and how come it took him so long to discover this?
Then John moved, pushing Rodney down onto the mattress and stretching out over him. Hard naked body, entirely naked and hard, and it was the best thing Rodney had ever felt, especially when John rocked his hips, his cock sliding right up next to his. With a gasp, Rodney grabbed hold of John's ass and John shoved down hard onto him, skin sliding against skin.
"God, I missed this," John said, pushing an arm under Rodney's shoulders and holding him tight, muscles straining as he pressed their bodies together. "I just really, really--god, Rodney, you feel so good."
It was incredible to feel John's strength, the power in his arms. An unexpected turn-on, and Rodney moaned and kissed him, hands digging into John's flesh, holding on tight in return. John seemed to like it, rubbing his cock on Rodney's hip, his kisses growing wet and frantic, lips sliding over Rodney's mouth and onto his neck to suck on his skin. Then John slithered further down, nipping at Rodney's chest and Rodney buried a hand in his hair, squirming and desperately rubbing his cock against John's stomach, because so good--so god damn good, especially against John's slick, sweaty skin.
When John's mouth reached a nipple, he sucked hard, and Rodney moaned again, shoulders curling up off the bed but John pushed him back down and sucked even harder. He licked Rodney's chest, leaving a wet trail on his skin. "Rodney," he said, eyes dark and dazed. "I want to suck you--can I suck you?"
"Oh god yes, what, you think I'd say no?" Rodney watched in awe as John lifted himself and moved down his body, pausing to kiss and nip at his stomach. His cock was so hard it ached, and he couldn't remember the last time sex was like this, frantic and hot.
"Look at you," John said, running his hands over Rodney's hips. The friction heated up Rodney's skin, and he was already unbearably hot, and John was just looking at his cock, and admiring it was all well and good but--but--
"Can you suck now, and look later?" Rodney asked, voice rising up high. John grinned delightedly, as if Rodney had just given him a gift and maybe he had, by wanting John as much as John wanted him. "Please?"
John dipped his head. Rodney moaned out loud at the warm, wet suction all around his cock, such a shock of exquisite pleasure that Rodney thrust up into John's mouth. "Sorry, sorry, sorry," he whispered, because that was rude, so rude, but John chuckled low in his throat and that was fucking amazing, he felt it against his legs and in his cock. Even more amazing were John's arms wrapping around his hips, hugging him close, John's hands gripping his ass as he sucked even harder.
"Oh my god," Rodney moaned. He was held firmly in place. He could barely move and that only made it more exciting, the thrill of it sizzling up and all through his body until his hands twisted in the sheets and he moaned shamelessly. Looking down, he could see John's head bobbing, John's arms around him and then it all was too much and he came, all light and heat as he poured himself out into John's mouth.
And when he was done John didn't release him. He held Rodney's cock in his mouth through the aftershocks, licking delicately until Rodney reached for him, gently touching his cheek. "John, please."
John let him go and then he released his iron grip around Rodney's hips. "Touch me?" he asked, crawling up next to Rodney.
Rodney's hands were already on him, even though he was lightheaded and maybe a little giddy from what might have been the most intense orgasm of his life. John looked so needy, so desperate and so hard, his cock jutting straight out and when Rodney slid his hands down John's body, John moaned, desperate for his touch. "I'm not going to be any good at this," Rodney said, shifting his weight and drawing his legs in underneath. "Not like you because that was the best damn blow-job ever but--"
He knelt next to John's hips and wrapped his fist around the base of John's cock. It was wet at the tip, a glistening drop of precome and after a split-second of hesitation Rodney put his lips to the head and tasted it. Sharp and salty, Rodney found it not exactly pleasant but not awful, either. The smooth, resilient flesh felt odd, unlike anything he'd put his mouth on before. But John's soft little "oh" of astonishment was encouraging, and he wanted to make John feel good, as crazy-good as John made him feel so he licked and tasted again, then closed his mouth over it and slid as far down on the shaft as he could.
John went stock still, so still that Rodney was afraid he had stopped breathing, but when he glanced up he saw John propped up on his arms and watching, mouth slack and hanging open, eyes wide. "That feels really good, Rodney," he said.
Such obvious delight, and Rodney had to fight a grin as he slid his mouth back up and then down again. He decided it would be better directly between John's legs. Crawling over one leg to settle directly between them, he hunkered down. "Ah, much better."
John had spread his legs wide. His balls looked soft and vulnerable. Rodney touched them carefully, cradling them in his hand and John smelled so good, so John that Rodney pushed his nose into the hair and sniffed, thrilled when John let out a whimper. More confident now, he held John's cock steady and licked it, all the way up the underside and then sucked on the head again, trying not to scrape with his teeth as he moved his mouth down and it wasn't exactly easy. He was even more impressed with John's cock-sucking abilities now that he had his mouth wrapped around one.
He ended up licking his palm and fisting the shaft as he sucked only on the rounded, flat head, but John seemed okay with that, making small desperate noises and squirming beneath him, occasionally whispering Rodney's name, telling him how good it felt, asking for faster and harder, and Rodney tried his best to oblige.
Then John pulled his legs up, digging his heels in and moaned low and loud. Rodney knew John was about to come, he could already taste it, but he wasn't exactly sure he could deal with an entire mouthful of the stuff, so when John's hips jerked he pulled back and stroked the full length of the shaft with a saliva-slicked fist.
Two strokes and then John came, come spurting all over his stomach and Rodney's hand. It was fascinating to see, all those muscles twitching and straining, hips lifting powerfully.
He had made John come.
When he finally let go of John's dripping cock, John tugged on his arm. "Come here, come here, Rodney, please--"
Rodney didn't know what to do with his wet, dripping hand, so he not-quite-surreptitiously wiped it on John's stomach as he moved back up the bed. "How was that?" he asked.
John rolled over and into him, heedless of the come on his stomach, smearing it over Rodney as he nestled in close and kissed him.
It was a lush, lingering kiss and Rodney sighed contentedly, interrupting only to pull a pillow under their heads. John draped a leg over his hip and they fit together amazingly well, only maybe Rodney shouldn't have been surprised by that, not at this point.
"Rodney," John said with a sleepy-eyed smile. "You sucked my dick."
"Yes, I did."
"I can't believe you did that. It was amazing." John kissed him again, sliding his hand up and down Rodney's side, petting him.
"I know, wasn't it?" Rodney kissed him, despite his snickering. It was fun to kiss John while he laughed.
Growing serious, John drew back and with an intent gaze, asked. "How are you feeling?"
Rodney thought for a moment. "Kind of sticky."
"Rodney--"
"Okay, okay," Rodney said. "How about--of all my new experiences here in the Pegasus galaxy, this one is, hands down, my absolute favorite?"
A sly look. "I'll bet you say that to all the boys."
"Only the pretty ones."
John laughed and pulled Rodney closer. "So, we're good?" he asked, pressing his forehead against Rodney's.
Utterly endearing, and Rodney's heart lurched. "We're good. We're very good."
"Good."
"And you know what? I think I might be gay."
"No, really?" John's eyes went wide with mock astonishment. Rodney nodded gravely, and that earned him another slow, sweet kiss. "See, you never know what you'll discover out here in the Pegasus galaxy."
"You're absolutely right. " And John had been the best discovery of all.
"Stay for a while?"
Suddenly aware of his lack of sleep, Rodney yawned. "To be honest? You may never get me out of this bed."
"I was kind of hoping for that," John said.
His voice was earnest, maybe a little shy and it took Rodney's post-coital mind a moment to process. "Oh. Oh. Well, yes, of course."
John tucked his face into Rodney's neck. "Good. You're where you belong." He slung an arm around Rodney's waist, and Rodney's arm instinctively slid around John's shoulders.
John was right. This was exactly where he belonged, even if it was the last place he ever expected to find himself.
***
"No, no, no, that's wrong, the level's too high, it's not going to work," Rodney said. Adding, when Radek didn’t answer, "You're ignoring me, aren't you?"
"Yes, I am ignoring you."
"You're going to burn out the main power conduit."
Radek flipped the switch. The instrument lit up, and hummed along happily, and the jumper's power reading remained in the normal range.
"Or, maybe not," Rodney admitted.
"You're going off-world soon, correct?" Radek asked, peering at Rodney over the top of his glasses.
"Yes, we are," Sheppard said, from the open door of the jumper. "Tomorrow."
"Colonel," Rodney exclaimed, his heart leaping, which was utterly ridiculous since it had only been six hours since John had climbed out of his bed. "Radek, the Colonel and I have a meeting, it's very important and--"
"Go, go, please. I'll have this ready in time for tomorrow's survey mission."
Rodney patted Radek's shoulder, and hurried off.
"So, are you all set for more action and adventure?" John asked as they left the jumper bay.
"Um," Rodney leaned close and whispered, "are you talking about tomorrow's mission, or our upcoming 'meeting'?"
A broad smile. "Both," John whispered back.
"Ready and willing. I've become quite the intrepid explorer, hmmm?" Rodney hesitated, and checked the hallway to make certain they were entirely alone before adding, "Can I be on the bottom this time?"
John's face lit up. "Really?"
"Yes, really."
He laughed as John hustled him into the transporter.