Grumpy Clause
Now that that shit's out of the way, what the hell. Here are some things that pissed me right off over the holidays:
frogbot warning me that the security line at the airport was gonna be ass-long flying down to Florida. Fuck you, london-broiled cock dripping. I was in and at the gate in like twenty minutes and had to wait forever to board that stupid plane. On top of that, it was late! I'm going to rape your lizard this weekend or something.
Jim, my boss, being a total, forgetful fuckhead. I really don't have much reason to complain about work, but christ. Old people getting old are fucking headaches. It's like having kids, when you've got to keep reminding them of things and repeating what you've told them and NO TIMMY THE TUNA DOES NOT GO IN THE TOILET JESUS CHRIST WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU. I've long since gotten used to his business practices, but it pisses me off that he's been getting cranky with other workers, but he won't snap at me. Ever.
sososook's image host being down, so I can't see hilarious ShikaTemaKurou crack. GOD DAMN IT.
Some pissant driving a utility van on my way home yesterday. Fucking twatflake was drunk or something, kept slowing down to 5 miles per hour, moving in the middle of the road to stop people between he and I from passing, and he kept trying to slam his prick into the little slots that sweet, sweet conditioned air flows from. I don't know why he'd want to do that. Personally, I'd try to fuck the headrest.
Stupid-ass cocksucking weird motherfucking guests. MU* guests, that is. For like a month or more, people would log in, move one room over, and log out. Really, what the fuck are you trying to find? A thousand naked women flopping about in titty triumph? On that note, if you're from Shangrila and looking for new places to play, don't. You know, just don't. Nobody wants you, you're totally unloved. Even the man that plays the woman that thinks she's a man that fucks your prepubescent werewolf in the ass with a slice of bree and a teacup in his/her/its hand while going "Oh my, what a lovely radish Mizzzzzzzzzz Doubleream has this morning," doesn't, no matter how much you pay.
The new people (well, they's not new, they've been there for a bit over a year) that own my apartment complex. Holy christ, where do people get the money for this. How is it profitable to take good communities and run them right the fuck into the ground while charging extorion-rate rent? Is it some Uwe Boll kind of thing? Are we Germany? Are tax laws -that- fucked up now that you can more more money by pissing it on a hobo? You know, why don't these people just buy CDs, or slaves, or gold-plated buttplugs? Surely that stuff appreciates better than shitty villas that people are scrambling to leave.
Chinese food. How the fuck did I ever eat that shit before? Last few times I've tried to eat various types of chicken, it's just this greasy, nasty shit, like somebody ground up the skin and dark meat to make a big lump of nast. German porn stars would gag on that crap.
Accessible customer service for technical products. If you're not smart enough to know how to turn a machine on and check its most basic components, THE SAME COMPONENTS THAT HAVE BEEN IN PCS FOR YEARS, then please chop your dick off and choke and idiot spawn you may have accidentally created, followed by passing out in a barrel so that hobos may burn your retarded corpse for heat. It'll be the most useful thing that you'll have ever done, trust me.
These god damned printers. Why the fuck did we ever get these? Huge pieces of shit. We had ONE running in the office, and I've had to replace it twice. TWICE. In one month. Christ. I just want to fucking fax and copy things.
Fucking Quickbooks. Swear to god, I just need to crack this thing and be done with it. Sharing a copy sucks hairy cheese penis.
Pedophiles. Why is this not a crime punishable by instant, ass-beating death?!
FUCKING NARUTO. Not the series, though, the character himself. How did I never seeth with murderous intent over the years? It's like it just hit me: the guy's a useless fucking moron. Christ, I hope he dies. It's like...there used to be some charm, like watching a little waterhead try to open his bottle of milk. There was so much effort, it was precious! Now, he can do anything. Hooray, what the shit ever. Let's see him write his name without leaking. Until Shikamaru comes back to awesome everyone in the face, it's time for me to pick up a new series.
frogbot warning me that the security line at the airport was gonna be ass-long flying down to Florida. Fuck you, london-broiled cock dripping. I was in and at the gate in like twenty minutes and had to wait forever to board that stupid plane. On top of that, it was late! I'm going to rape your lizard this weekend or something.
Jim, my boss, being a total, forgetful fuckhead. I really don't have much reason to complain about work, but christ. Old people getting old are fucking headaches. It's like having kids, when you've got to keep reminding them of things and repeating what you've told them and NO TIMMY THE TUNA DOES NOT GO IN THE TOILET JESUS CHRIST WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU. I've long since gotten used to his business practices, but it pisses me off that he's been getting cranky with other workers, but he won't snap at me. Ever.
sososook's image host being down, so I can't see hilarious ShikaTemaKurou crack. GOD DAMN IT.
Some pissant driving a utility van on my way home yesterday. Fucking twatflake was drunk or something, kept slowing down to 5 miles per hour, moving in the middle of the road to stop people between he and I from passing, and he kept trying to slam his prick into the little slots that sweet, sweet conditioned air flows from. I don't know why he'd want to do that. Personally, I'd try to fuck the headrest.
Stupid-ass cocksucking weird motherfucking guests. MU* guests, that is. For like a month or more, people would log in, move one room over, and log out. Really, what the fuck are you trying to find? A thousand naked women flopping about in titty triumph? On that note, if you're from Shangrila and looking for new places to play, don't. You know, just don't. Nobody wants you, you're totally unloved. Even the man that plays the woman that thinks she's a man that fucks your prepubescent werewolf in the ass with a slice of bree and a teacup in his/her/its hand while going "Oh my, what a lovely radish Mizzzzzzzzzz Doubleream has this morning," doesn't, no matter how much you pay.
The new people (well, they's not new, they've been there for a bit over a year) that own my apartment complex. Holy christ, where do people get the money for this. How is it profitable to take good communities and run them right the fuck into the ground while charging extorion-rate rent? Is it some Uwe Boll kind of thing? Are we Germany? Are tax laws -that- fucked up now that you can more more money by pissing it on a hobo? You know, why don't these people just buy CDs, or slaves, or gold-plated buttplugs? Surely that stuff appreciates better than shitty villas that people are scrambling to leave.
Chinese food. How the fuck did I ever eat that shit before? Last few times I've tried to eat various types of chicken, it's just this greasy, nasty shit, like somebody ground up the skin and dark meat to make a big lump of nast. German porn stars would gag on that crap.
Accessible customer service for technical products. If you're not smart enough to know how to turn a machine on and check its most basic components, THE SAME COMPONENTS THAT HAVE BEEN IN PCS FOR YEARS, then please chop your dick off and choke and idiot spawn you may have accidentally created, followed by passing out in a barrel so that hobos may burn your retarded corpse for heat. It'll be the most useful thing that you'll have ever done, trust me.
These god damned printers. Why the fuck did we ever get these? Huge pieces of shit. We had ONE running in the office, and I've had to replace it twice. TWICE. In one month. Christ. I just want to fucking fax and copy things.
Fucking Quickbooks. Swear to god, I just need to crack this thing and be done with it. Sharing a copy sucks hairy cheese penis.
Pedophiles. Why is this not a crime punishable by instant, ass-beating death?!
FUCKING NARUTO. Not the series, though, the character himself. How did I never seeth with murderous intent over the years? It's like it just hit me: the guy's a useless fucking moron. Christ, I hope he dies. It's like...there used to be some charm, like watching a little waterhead try to open his bottle of milk. There was so much effort, it was precious! Now, he can do anything. Hooray, what the shit ever. Let's see him write his name without leaking. Until Shikamaru comes back to awesome everyone in the face, it's time for me to pick up a new series.