Fic - Je me souviens.

[theletterseven]

Title: Je me souviens.
Author: Lysa
Characters/Pairing: Roe, Heffron.
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, no disrespect meant to the real men of the 506th.
Summary: It's the hardest job. One he didn't even want.
A/N: Not really a pairing, just musing after watching "Bastogne."

Comments

[sparrowette]

If you're up for writing advice (I'm not sure, as you say this is just 'musing'), I'd say this would work better as second or third person voice -- the omniscience (especially concerning details like Toye and Guarnere's fate) jars a bit with Roe's point of view. With third person, you could examine everything, past, present, and future, from your own knowledge of canon.

That said, I did like this bit: Not only could they no longer try, I could no longer make sure that they could. It gives me the impression of a broken support.

[theyreforrachel]

I was going for first-person reflection from some unnamed point in the future, but now I see what you mean. There's some tense problems that do not work. I wrote this quite a while ago, and posted without really finding someone to beta. Thanks for your advice.

[foofighter0234]

I would meet their eyes and nod, as if to say that it was all right to let go, but knowing in my heart that it was only an easy way out.

*weeps* that is beautiful.

[theyreforrachel]

thank you.

[foofighter0234]

you're welcome. :)

[m_buggie]

Oh great good God, that's beautiful. I love it.

Their memories would be fresh for too short of a time before beginning to slip away, joining the other nameless faces that are trapped behind the glass of the past.
I really like that line. The imagery it brings to mind is quite haunting.

I hated only few things more than the feeling of failure.
And that line? Fanfreakintastic. It's perfect.

So yeah, long story short: this was amazing. Absolutely amazing.

[theyreforrachel]

why thank you :)

[azzymav]

Wow, this is really beautiful. I love the imagery.

My favorite line had to be: 'beckoning me to place my hands upon another defeated fighter and lull him until death became a comforting option.'

It's a perfect description, without too many details, just enough to show how Roe feels.

[theyreforrachel]

thank you ♥

[thimpressionist]

I'm catching up on fic, so I'm a little behind. Your roe voice is really interesting; I loved the combination of disillusionment and determination. Nice to see an icon maker getting into to writing :-)

[theyreforrachel]

why thank you. ♥

actually, I was a writer first, then an iconmaker. hee.