The Empire of Douche

[thenew20s37]

I picked the kids up from school today and ran into another parent I hadn't seen since last summer at one of my stepkids' birthday parties, hosted by their mother and stepfather. Even though I knew his kids, I didn't know him, so I said hello

Comments

[waterredwood]

Also (and yes I clicked on your blog to see more about you after your post) boundaries are really important in a 50/50 custody situation. Your gut says the "hanging out" with BM isn't right, and it knows what it's talking about. Parents in this situation CAN get along quite well, but the relationship needs to stay professional untit it evolves into friendly organically, which may or may not happen. A relationship can't just jump into friends from strangers any more than it can from lovers. That's not the way people work. Don't be afraid to set the boundaries. It is easy? No. Does it make things worse for a short time? Yes. But it makes things MUCH better in the long run and is completely and totally worth it for your sanity.

The 50/50

[thenew20s37]

Hey, Waterredwood!

I had forgotten that I posted my road trips with mom on LJ. Short memory I have. I had also forgotten my frustrated post about the "hanging out" with BM. Funny that I should log on now and read your response. More time has passed, and the relationship with BM and her homewrecker has certainly devolved on my end. She has proven to me in recent months that she is what she always was--self-serving, transparently calculating. DH and I just parted for the evening on bad terms because I had suggested he talk to the little one's teacher about a recent report card, and he insisted that he couldn't have the meeting without consulting BM first. I was foolishly surprised to hear that. It reminded me that my role in this gig is still pretty marginal. I really appreciate your advice about setting boundaries. And yes, it is not easy! It's a long process.

I hope we'll communicate more in the future!