LJ Idol Week One: Jayus
"I love you," I said to my wife.
"Yay," is her response. Sometimes she says "Yay" and sometimes she says "I love you too". Both mean the same thing.
"And, I love the Kaylenea." Our daughter - well, my step-daughter - is in the room doing school work. She attends an online school. Is that part of being home schooled? I've yet to figure out the terminology.
"Yay," they both say.
"And, I love the Jonathan." Our son - well, my step-son - is not in the room. He goes to a brick and mortar school.
"Yay," they both say.
"And," I continue, "I love the kitties." We have three cats, all brothers or at least half-brothers from a group of three litters that a friend had all at the same time. I came home from work one day and there they were. One for Jon, one for Kay, and one picked out for me.
"Yay," they both say.
"And," I say, looking down at the animal in my lap, "I don't like the doggies."
Both my wife and daughter stop what they are doing. They look at me, sitting on the couch with both of the dogs. One for Jon, one for Kay. Zelda has her head on Link's butt. Link has his head on my leg. My hand rests on Link's head. "What did you say?" My wife asks.
"I don't like the doggies."
It is a rather hurtful thing to say and I'm sure Link and Zelda would take offense if they knew English. But, it is my claim.
"You do like the doggies," my wife says. I deny it.
"You're cuddling with the doggies," my daughter points out. I move my hand and claim that I'm not doing so by choice.
I'm a cat person, not a dog person. I'm perfectly ok with the kids having dogs and me not having one. I don't want the responsibility that comes with a dog that doesn't come with a cat. I mean, I do feed the dogs when the kids oversleep and miss their breakfast. And, I let them outside when they scratch at the door and the kids are nose-deep in the computer doing school work or playing Sims or playing Starmage or talking on Skype. And, I let them back in when they bark and the kids don't hear because they have their headsets on. And, I remind the kids to take them for walks now that I'm not physically able to do so myself. And, I buy more doggie treats than kitty treats and more doggie toys than kitty toys.
"I don't like the doggies," I claim again. I'm even using a term of affection rather than a simple descriptive "dogs" in my claim.
Both of them laugh at me. Not with me. At me.
Taken seriously, it is a bad thing to say. Taken at straight value with both what is said and how it is said, it is a hurtful thing to say. But, taken in context, it is more of a joke. Not the normal kind of joke. As Harry Anderson once said, "Its like the funny kind ... only different."
"Yay," is her response. Sometimes she says "Yay" and sometimes she says "I love you too". Both mean the same thing.
"And, I love the Kaylenea." Our daughter - well, my step-daughter - is in the room doing school work. She attends an online school. Is that part of being home schooled? I've yet to figure out the terminology.
"Yay," they both say.
"And, I love the Jonathan." Our son - well, my step-son - is not in the room. He goes to a brick and mortar school.
"Yay," they both say.
"And," I continue, "I love the kitties." We have three cats, all brothers or at least half-brothers from a group of three litters that a friend had all at the same time. I came home from work one day and there they were. One for Jon, one for Kay, and one picked out for me.
"Yay," they both say.
"And," I say, looking down at the animal in my lap, "I don't like the doggies."
Both my wife and daughter stop what they are doing. They look at me, sitting on the couch with both of the dogs. One for Jon, one for Kay. Zelda has her head on Link's butt. Link has his head on my leg. My hand rests on Link's head. "What did you say?" My wife asks.
"I don't like the doggies."
It is a rather hurtful thing to say and I'm sure Link and Zelda would take offense if they knew English. But, it is my claim.
"You do like the doggies," my wife says. I deny it.
"You're cuddling with the doggies," my daughter points out. I move my hand and claim that I'm not doing so by choice.
I'm a cat person, not a dog person. I'm perfectly ok with the kids having dogs and me not having one. I don't want the responsibility that comes with a dog that doesn't come with a cat. I mean, I do feed the dogs when the kids oversleep and miss their breakfast. And, I let them outside when they scratch at the door and the kids are nose-deep in the computer doing school work or playing Sims or playing Starmage or talking on Skype. And, I let them back in when they bark and the kids don't hear because they have their headsets on. And, I remind the kids to take them for walks now that I'm not physically able to do so myself. And, I buy more doggie treats than kitty treats and more doggie toys than kitty toys.
"I don't like the doggies," I claim again. I'm even using a term of affection rather than a simple descriptive "dogs" in my claim.
Both of them laugh at me. Not with me. At me.
Taken seriously, it is a bad thing to say. Taken at straight value with both what is said and how it is said, it is a hurtful thing to say. But, taken in context, it is more of a joke. Not the normal kind of joke. As Harry Anderson once said, "Its like the funny kind ... only different."