so I've been doing that thing where I sit down and try to write lyrics and I realized
that there are number of very specific lyrical gambits that almost always delight me.
1. when the singer gives driving directions.up around 95
sailing down Storrow Drive
left exit into Kenmore Square
the Bosstones, "I Want My City Back"
we boned down Vernon, right on Normandie
left on Florence-- gettin' thru the E.T.G.'s
spun out on Vermont, made a left on Colden
right on Hoover... E, where we goin'?
Ice-T, "Midnight"
2. when the singer describes with satisfaction the commission of a crime.they gave chase, but my man Steve is an ace;
we lost those brothers with haste.
we casted off and along we went off Bermuda to an island resort we rented.
running around, robbin' banks, all whacked off of Scooby Snacks.
Fun Lovin' Criminals, "Scooby Snacks"
runnin' outta gas, time to park it, I'm on foot.
we in the hood, how the fuck they gon' catch a crook?
haha-- I got away cause I'm clever.
went to my neighbors for a favor; now you know players stick together.
I watch the scene from the rooftop,
spittin' loogies at the coppers that pursue me, beeyotch!
2Pac, "Open Fire"
3. when the singer erupts with needlessly archaic grammar.
young Carter, go further, go farther, go harder
is that not why we came? and if not, then why bother?
Jay-Z in Li'l Wayne's "Mr. Carter"
honor, commended no longer as virtue.
yet, shalt be extolled at light's demise!
Emperor, "the Loss and Curse of Reverence"
4. when there's a small, contained bit of structural perfection somewhere in the lyrics-- not longer than a line or two, and completely extraneous to the song's message.
how does it feel to be one of the beautiful people?
the Beatles, "Baby, You're a Rich Man"
I came for the car and the vacuum,
spinning my wheels into the void.
Prick, "Make Believe"
5. when the singer makes a nonsensical or cryptic chess reference.
take this invitation: bishop's queen to pawn.
all that was is taken. all that is is gone.
Ministry, "the Fall"
the Black Queen chants the funeral march, the cracked brass bells will ring
and summon back the Fire Witch to the court of the Crimson King.
King Crimson, "Court of the Crimson King"
HONORABLE MENTION:
when logic and proportion have fallen sloppy dead,
and the White Knight is talking backward,
and the Red Queen's "off with her head!"
Jefferson Airplane, "White Rabbit"
5. when the singer promises to set something on fire.
I kind of want to catch up with LiveJournal (I've been busy playing Scrabble and Risk on Facebook! also, moving to a new country) but I don't know where to start. McCain and Palin are crazy as fuck, the newest Anonymous anti-Scientology video is the most awesome yet, the new Metallica album is far better than I would have expected (but still sucks), I saw Shaft dubbed into German (which is more awesome than you could possibly imagine), and Grolsch Kanon (which is nearly 12% alcohol) tastes strangely like champagne. if I think of anything else important I'll let you know.
-out.1
--
1. ending a LiveJournal entry thusly is the registered, exclusive, and nontransferable trademark of apatheticenough and is used with the deepest and most utmost of respect.
1. when the singer gives driving directions.up around 95
sailing down Storrow Drive
left exit into Kenmore Square
the Bosstones, "I Want My City Back"
we boned down Vernon, right on Normandie
left on Florence-- gettin' thru the E.T.G.'s
spun out on Vermont, made a left on Colden
right on Hoover... E, where we goin'?
Ice-T, "Midnight"
2. when the singer describes with satisfaction the commission of a crime.they gave chase, but my man Steve is an ace;
we lost those brothers with haste.
we casted off and along we went off Bermuda to an island resort we rented.
running around, robbin' banks, all whacked off of Scooby Snacks.
Fun Lovin' Criminals, "Scooby Snacks"
runnin' outta gas, time to park it, I'm on foot.
we in the hood, how the fuck they gon' catch a crook?
haha-- I got away cause I'm clever.
went to my neighbors for a favor; now you know players stick together.
I watch the scene from the rooftop,
spittin' loogies at the coppers that pursue me, beeyotch!
2Pac, "Open Fire"
3. when the singer erupts with needlessly archaic grammar.
young Carter, go further, go farther, go harder
is that not why we came? and if not, then why bother?
Jay-Z in Li'l Wayne's "Mr. Carter"
honor, commended no longer as virtue.
yet, shalt be extolled at light's demise!
Emperor, "the Loss and Curse of Reverence"
4. when there's a small, contained bit of structural perfection somewhere in the lyrics-- not longer than a line or two, and completely extraneous to the song's message.
how does it feel to be one of the beautiful people?
the Beatles, "Baby, You're a Rich Man"
I came for the car and the vacuum,
spinning my wheels into the void.
Prick, "Make Believe"
5. when the singer makes a nonsensical or cryptic chess reference.
take this invitation: bishop's queen to pawn.
all that was is taken. all that is is gone.
Ministry, "the Fall"
the Black Queen chants the funeral march, the cracked brass bells will ring
and summon back the Fire Witch to the court of the Crimson King.
King Crimson, "Court of the Crimson King"
HONORABLE MENTION:
when logic and proportion have fallen sloppy dead,
and the White Knight is talking backward,
and the Red Queen's "off with her head!"
Jefferson Airplane, "White Rabbit"
5. when the singer promises to set something on fire.
I kind of want to catch up with LiveJournal (I've been busy playing Scrabble and Risk on Facebook! also, moving to a new country) but I don't know where to start. McCain and Palin are crazy as fuck, the newest Anonymous anti-Scientology video is the most awesome yet, the new Metallica album is far better than I would have expected (but still sucks), I saw Shaft dubbed into German (which is more awesome than you could possibly imagine), and Grolsch Kanon (which is nearly 12% alcohol) tastes strangely like champagne. if I think of anything else important I'll let you know.
-out.1
--
1. ending a LiveJournal entry thusly is the registered, exclusive, and nontransferable trademark of apatheticenough and is used with the deepest and most utmost of respect.