[Multi-chapter] Rumors (3/7)
Title: Rumors (3/7)
Pairing: Ohmiya, ??
Rating: PG
Genre: Fluff, School AU.
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the story ~ Arashi own my heart.
Summary: The rumor didn't bother Nino so much until he met that person. And he started to wonder whether it was true or not, and one day he became the center of another rumor, too.
A/N: this is beta-ed by potatoos thanks so much for your hard work! I tried my best to update it soon, though the test is coming and I still haven't finished studying yet -'____'-, hope you'll enjoy it!!! And as usual, comments are loved <333.
Chapter 3
The lunchtimes without Ohno were boring. Nino was quite surprised of himself - he used to feel perfectly happy and comfortable when he was alone in his own world. He didn’t care much about others’ company. But that day, Nino felt so lonely. He was lying on his back, staring at the sky blankly, and wondered what Ohno was doing. He was probably busy with his never-ending pile of assignments, yet he still needed to redo those homeworks again. Had he had lunch? He seemed to not eat enough, since he was so thin and pale. Even though Nino never took care of his own health (he wasn’t the type who would think about eating on time or getting enough nutrients), he was worried about Ohno not eating enough. He wanted to make sure that Ohno took his lunch on time and…
… Visiting him at his classroom was okay, right?
Once this thought was formed, it bothered Nino so much that he couldn’t resist not carrying it out - somehow, he felt that he needed to do it, as he badly wanted to meet the older boy even though he had no idea why. He walked out of his classroom and descended one level. Ohno’s class was at the second floor, and the corridor was packed with students. They stared at him curiously as he walked past them, but Nino didn’t care. He headed for Ohno’s classroom and peered inside to look for the older boy.
Ohno was sitting at his usual seat, his hand writing something in his notebook and his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. Nino stared at him helplessly, not knowing how to get his attention without alerting his classmates. Suddenly, a voice mocked him from behind his back, startling him.
“What are you doing here, little boy?”
It was one of Ohno’s classmates. He was looking at Nino scornfully, and Nino fought back the urge to punch him. He forced a smile on his face instead.
“Could you please call Ohno-san for me?”
“What? That weirdo?” The boy said derisively “What are you doing with him?”
“He’s not” Nino clenched his fists “You should be careful with your words”
“Oh, scary” The boy replied in a sing-song voice “Ohno-san, there’s a little boy here wanting to meet you.”
The students in class turned and fixed their eyes on Nino, making him feel awkward. There weren’t many students in class at that moment, but Nino still felt uncomfortable. He hated being in the spotlight.
Ohno stared at him bewilderedly from his seat, and Nino wondered if he was bothering Ohno. They stared at each other until Ohno stood up and walked towards him. Nino sighed in relief when he saw Ohno smiling at him.
However, there was something strange about his smile. It lacked passion or happiness, and of everything that Nino had felt before. It was a superficial smile.
Ohno didn’t really smile at him, Nino suddenly realised, and the thought made him feel disappointed as he bit his lips nervously.
“What are you doing here, Ninomiya-kun?” Ohno asked politely. The way Ohno called him made Nino feel uneasy and a little hurt - he was already used to how Ohno used to call him - Nino-chan (even though the way he called him made Nino feel like a girl, Nino really didn’t mind).
“I was… just wondering if you have had lunch or…” Nino stammered, his arms hanging awkwardly by his side. He put them into his pocket, and waited anxiously for Ohno’s reply.
“Yes, I have” Ohno cut him off immediately “Thank you for your concern, but I must go back to my study. Is this all that you wanted to ask?”
“Yeah… Yes” Nino felt all his energy being drained away as he feel so frustrated with himself. I just bothered him - he couldn’t help thinking so, the unknown voice just echoed in his mind constantly. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to …”
“It’s okay” As though he could see Nino’s thought, Ohno waved his hand slightly at the younger boy as he turned away “I’ll go back to my study then, see you later”.
And he returned to his table. Some girls approached him with a wide smile, asking him about something and Nino could see Ohno shaking his head while smiling softly at them.
Unable to stand the sudden growth of fear in his heart, Nino turned around and walked as fast as he could to the terrace. To his spot. However, it felt terribly empty now. He tried to ignore the tears that were threatening to overflow and tightened his grip on the handrail until his fingers ached and knuckles turned white. He didn’t feel any sensation in his fingers anymore, and that was exactly how he wanted his whole body to feel. Nino didn’t want to feel the hurt spreading over his entire body and the unbearable loneliness in his heart. He didn’t want to think about it. He didn’t know what had gotten into him, and he didn’t understand why he would react in this way.
All he could understand now was that he didn’t want Ohno to become distant with him. He wanted to see the older boy’s bright smile. He wanted to hear his laughter. He wanted to be with him again.
Perhaps he was being conceited, thinking that he was Ohno’s only friend?
Perhaps he had misunderstood all of this, and thought that Ohno was happy being with him as he was with Ohno.
His tears overflowed and Nino was shaking slightly. He hated to cry, but he couldn’t stop the warm tears from staining his face. Not when he was alone.
Only the wind was stroking his hair softly, consoling him slightly.
-------------------------------------------
Glancing at the door to make sure that Nino was gone, Ohno sighed and buried his face into his palms, trying to straighten out his thoughts.
He had to do that. He had to keep his distance with Nino, or he would drag the younger boy into his mess.
On the day he first met Nino, Ohno’s heart had been warmed up a little. It seemed like Nino could heal his broken heart from his previous relationship. He wondered if by letting Nino understand him more, perhaps the younger boy would help him find himself again? Ohno felt completely lost after the break-up, and he tried to run away from the truth. He had moved here, far away from his family; he had changed school, to avoid meeting him everyday. Yet his first day at school was scary. People looked at him weirdly and talked behind his back. They locked him in the toilet, vandalized his locker, tore his notebook pages, and chased after him until he had finally escaped to the terrace. He didn’t understand why they had treated him that way, until he heard someone said something about him.
He’s gay.
So they knew, he thought. Therefore they react. Ohno was used to this - he had been through it once before at his old school. But he was able to handle all of this when he could look forward to meeting Nino everyday during lunch. Being with Nino was always the most peaceful period of his day, and chatting with Nino was relaxing and comfortable. Ohno felt that he could tell Nino everything, and Nino would understand. The way Nino listened to him and shared his vent up feelings helped warm his heart day after day. He had also found his smile back again.
However, Ohno was also scared. He knew that he couldn’t fall for Nino; the younger boy didn’t even know about his sexual orientation! Or perhaps he knew, but had chose not mentioned it. Nah, he probably doesn’t know, Ohno felt his hope rising. But just a moment later, his heart sank as he realised that not knowing also meant Nino would never have feelings for him. Ohno knew that deep down inside his heart he wasn’t ready for another relationship, not when he had just escaped from one. He knew that he shouldn’t have feelings for Nino. The younger boy had his normal, happy life, and Ohno shouldn’t be so selfish. If he kept getting closer to Nino, there would definitely be rumors again, and Nino would be in trouble. That would be Ohno’s fault, and he couldn’t stand the thought of ruining Nino’s life. Never.
Thus, on the day when he had told Nino the truth about himself, Ohno had decided to keep away from Nino, even if it meant that he would be lonely again. He would no longer have Nino to brighten up his days.
Somehow Ohno thought that nothing good would happen to them if he started to fall for the younger man.
It would be better had they not met each other.
When Ohno knew that Nino was looking for him, his heart quickened inside his chest with excitement. His tired eyes became fresher and his heavy mind more awaked. He tensed as he looked at the person he had badly wanted to meet, right outside the classroom in the hallway, and was looking at him anxiously, as if he didn’t dare to call out to Ohno.
No. Ohno’s mind warned. No.
But I want to be friends with him. His heart defended. It’s just friends, nothing more. So it’s okay, isn’t it?
No. He blinked, returning to reality. What if I fall for him?
He decided that he mustn’t.
Ohno stood up from his seat and walked towards Nino, forcing a smile on his face. He saw Nino looking worriedly at him and his heart tightened in despair. He wanted to tell Nino to stay with him, and that they could laugh together again.
But he didn’t.
“What are you doing here, Ninomiya-kun?” His voice was so dry that even he couldn’t believe that it was him talking.
Nino’s sad eyes were the only thing Ohno thought he couldn’t bear to look at in his whole life. He knew that Nino was hurt by his cold tone, but nevertheless still showed his concern to him…
Please don’t do that. Ohno’s heart ached. Don’t care so much about me.
As he heard himself saying goodbye and felt his own legs walking away from the younger boy, Ohno fought the urge to turn back to see Nino’s face. His classmates came up to him and asked playfully if Nino was his next target.
I wished. Ohno thought. I would be so happy.
And he smiled at them, shaking his head slightly.
“No”, he said. The thought of Nino becoming his love was too sweet to be true. He smiled bitterly “He’s just a kouhai”. He replied more to himself than to his classmates.
The scene replayed over and over again in his mind, of how Nino worried about him, how he was concerned about him, how he looked sad as he stared after Ohno walking away …
Why must Nino do that? He was making Ohno fall for him. And that’s the last thing Ohno wanted to happen.
He couldn’t bring harm to Nino.
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