a model canine.
so i found the most epic romance novel ever at the library yesterday. it's called.....*drumroll* Confessions of a Werewolf Supermodel. i shit you not and needless to say, i checked it out ASAP and i'm going to comment on it as i go along in the book.
you guys, it comes with an amazing cover as well.
BEHOLD.
seriously, this book screams hilarity ensues, despite being a supernatural romance novel with a murder mystery. i'm pretty sure that if werewolves are involved, there has to be vampires or something involved because sure, why not? i googled the author, just so i know what i'm getting into, and found out she has since passed away in 2007, ironically before this was published and put in stores. RIP Ronda Thompson, i'm sorry if i sound like i'm mocking your book. BUT SERIOUSLY, WEREWOLF SUPERMODEL. I CANNOT RESIST MY CURIOSITY.
CHAPTER ONE
Most woman find the bloating, cramping and bitchiness of PMS bothersome at worst. I turn into a monster a week before my period...literally.
And thus begins our adventure; our supermodel heroine starts out by saying that just before she gets her period, she turns into a werewolf and she's hiding in a tiny bathroom fretting over a patch of wolf fur that's appeared on her shoulder and then mentions that she's flashing back to her prom night seven years ago. She's also hoping that she doesn't sprout a tail in the meantime because hello, she's a supermodel in very tiny underwear.
My beauty bag is with me at all times now and represents my lifeline to normalcy. It weighs about ten pounds and is filled with every kind of beauty product available, plus, my own tried-and-true concoctions, and what I like to call werewolf essentials. I'd start my own line, but as far as I know, I'm the only werewolf supermodel in the world.
This book is amazing; by the way, she keeps wax and waxing strips in that beauty bag. Talk about one prepared werewolf supermodel. I can't stop saying it: werewolf supermodel. werewolf supermodel. WEREWOLF SUPERMODEL. Did I mention this is only CHAPTER ONE? :D
Our heroine finds her much needed waxing strips and applies it just as someone calls her name. Our heroine's name? Lou Kinipski. I'll let that sink in a bit as she then lets us know that she may or may not be lusting after her hot session photographer, Stefan O'Connor. Lou proceeds to fill us in on how she inadvertently became a hot supermodel thanks to Stefan discovering her eating at an East Side cafe six and a half years ago; she ran away from home six months after her prom night because she calls herself a werewolf murderer and changed her original name to Lou Kinipski to remind herself that she was once an ugly person. Of course, now she's a supermodel.
Stefan, by the way, is beating down on the door asking her to get her ass on set and she's delaying the whole lingerie shoot. Did I mention our heroine is in very tiny underwear and having a minor freakout over sprouting fur and a tail and maybe fangs? So she applies her waxing strips on her shoulder and screams as she yanks that shit off and flashing back to her prom night and when she's done freaking out, hot photographer boy is annoyed that she's delaying his lingerie shoot in which the models pose in tiny underwear with angel wings. ('Sup Victoria's Secret shout out.)
It's here that it's mentioned that Stefan, our hot photographer, is a nervous Starbucks control freak bordering on mental breakdown but is a master in the bedroom arts. How does our girl Lou know about this? because she's been dithering between wanting to fuck him right there and wanting a real and meaningful relationship with him thanks to the fact that she's a werewolf and might have killed someone in the past.
As I do as instructed, Stefan's breath whispers across my skin. He touches me whil he works. A delicious shiver races up my back. I try like hell to ignore it. If Stefan were just another handsome face with a hot body, I would have had him a long time ago. But our relationship goes deeper than mere sex. Or at least it does with me. I can't sleep with someone I care about. Not with all the lies attached to my past.
Oh, and by the way, we learn that while Stefan is hot, he's bald and shaves his head due to the fact that he's inherited his father's balding hair. Our girl Lou calls him a "bald hottie".
Once they're done with the bit of UST there and she's ready to shoot, it turn out that this lingerie shoot is taking place in freezing snowstorm-capable weather and all the models are in tiny lingerie with angel wings. Yep. And then cue the makeup artist on the shoot, Cindy Emerson, who not only works for Stefan, but just happens to be our heroine's lesbian best friend since childhood. Wow, what a coinkydink! Cindy also happens to be the only person that knows our girl is a werewolf and totally understands why our girl was delayed thanks to the "PMS" codeword.
Things are a bit hectic at the shoot since IT'S PRACTICALLY A BLIZZARD OUT AND THESE GIRLS ARE IN UNDERWEAR ON A PHOTOSHOOT. Apparently, Stefan's motto is "No pain, no gain". As the shoot goes on, our girl is mentally imagining herself tangled with Stefan in bed and here we learn that our girl's hair and eye color: midnight black hair and jade green eyes. She and the other girls psych themselves up in order to finish this shoot as quick as possible because it's fucking freezing out and if Stefan isn't pleased with the results, they'll end up with hypothermia or something. Of course, he is pleased with the results and the shoot concludes with Cindy giving Lou a huge blanket to cover up and then....DUN DUN DUN!
CUE MYSTERIOUS-LOOKING HOT GUY DRESSED ALL IN BLACK. He's looking for Lou Kinipski and by the way, he's a cop and wants to interrogate her. Uh oh....
AND THIS ENDS CHAPTER ONE. tbqh, this book is actually looking up to be on the entertaining side because despite the absolutely ridiculous premises and occasional crappy sentence and a name like LOU KINIPSKI, it's pretty well written so far and i'm really stoked to keep reading on.
this is only the first chapter. you guys, i'm so stoked to read and recap this because HOW DOES THIS BOOK EXIST? MY FACE IS JUST LIKE NADINE'S RIGHT NOW.
you guys, it comes with an amazing cover as well.
BEHOLD.
seriously, this book screams hilarity ensues, despite being a supernatural romance novel with a murder mystery. i'm pretty sure that if werewolves are involved, there has to be vampires or something involved because sure, why not? i googled the author, just so i know what i'm getting into, and found out she has since passed away in 2007, ironically before this was published and put in stores. RIP Ronda Thompson, i'm sorry if i sound like i'm mocking your book. BUT SERIOUSLY, WEREWOLF SUPERMODEL. I CANNOT RESIST MY CURIOSITY.
CHAPTER ONE
Most woman find the bloating, cramping and bitchiness of PMS bothersome at worst. I turn into a monster a week before my period...literally.
And thus begins our adventure; our supermodel heroine starts out by saying that just before she gets her period, she turns into a werewolf and she's hiding in a tiny bathroom fretting over a patch of wolf fur that's appeared on her shoulder and then mentions that she's flashing back to her prom night seven years ago. She's also hoping that she doesn't sprout a tail in the meantime because hello, she's a supermodel in very tiny underwear.
My beauty bag is with me at all times now and represents my lifeline to normalcy. It weighs about ten pounds and is filled with every kind of beauty product available, plus, my own tried-and-true concoctions, and what I like to call werewolf essentials. I'd start my own line, but as far as I know, I'm the only werewolf supermodel in the world.
This book is amazing; by the way, she keeps wax and waxing strips in that beauty bag. Talk about one prepared werewolf supermodel. I can't stop saying it: werewolf supermodel. werewolf supermodel. WEREWOLF SUPERMODEL. Did I mention this is only CHAPTER ONE? :D
Our heroine finds her much needed waxing strips and applies it just as someone calls her name. Our heroine's name? Lou Kinipski. I'll let that sink in a bit as she then lets us know that she may or may not be lusting after her hot session photographer, Stefan O'Connor. Lou proceeds to fill us in on how she inadvertently became a hot supermodel thanks to Stefan discovering her eating at an East Side cafe six and a half years ago; she ran away from home six months after her prom night because she calls herself a werewolf murderer and changed her original name to Lou Kinipski to remind herself that she was once an ugly person. Of course, now she's a supermodel.
Stefan, by the way, is beating down on the door asking her to get her ass on set and she's delaying the whole lingerie shoot. Did I mention our heroine is in very tiny underwear and having a minor freakout over sprouting fur and a tail and maybe fangs? So she applies her waxing strips on her shoulder and screams as she yanks that shit off and flashing back to her prom night and when she's done freaking out, hot photographer boy is annoyed that she's delaying his lingerie shoot in which the models pose in tiny underwear with angel wings. ('Sup Victoria's Secret shout out.)
It's here that it's mentioned that Stefan, our hot photographer, is a nervous Starbucks control freak bordering on mental breakdown but is a master in the bedroom arts. How does our girl Lou know about this? because she's been dithering between wanting to fuck him right there and wanting a real and meaningful relationship with him thanks to the fact that she's a werewolf and might have killed someone in the past.
As I do as instructed, Stefan's breath whispers across my skin. He touches me whil he works. A delicious shiver races up my back. I try like hell to ignore it. If Stefan were just another handsome face with a hot body, I would have had him a long time ago. But our relationship goes deeper than mere sex. Or at least it does with me. I can't sleep with someone I care about. Not with all the lies attached to my past.
Oh, and by the way, we learn that while Stefan is hot, he's bald and shaves his head due to the fact that he's inherited his father's balding hair. Our girl Lou calls him a "bald hottie".
Once they're done with the bit of UST there and she's ready to shoot, it turn out that this lingerie shoot is taking place in freezing snowstorm-capable weather and all the models are in tiny lingerie with angel wings. Yep. And then cue the makeup artist on the shoot, Cindy Emerson, who not only works for Stefan, but just happens to be our heroine's lesbian best friend since childhood. Wow, what a coinkydink! Cindy also happens to be the only person that knows our girl is a werewolf and totally understands why our girl was delayed thanks to the "PMS" codeword.
Things are a bit hectic at the shoot since IT'S PRACTICALLY A BLIZZARD OUT AND THESE GIRLS ARE IN UNDERWEAR ON A PHOTOSHOOT. Apparently, Stefan's motto is "No pain, no gain". As the shoot goes on, our girl is mentally imagining herself tangled with Stefan in bed and here we learn that our girl's hair and eye color: midnight black hair and jade green eyes. She and the other girls psych themselves up in order to finish this shoot as quick as possible because it's fucking freezing out and if Stefan isn't pleased with the results, they'll end up with hypothermia or something. Of course, he is pleased with the results and the shoot concludes with Cindy giving Lou a huge blanket to cover up and then....DUN DUN DUN!
CUE MYSTERIOUS-LOOKING HOT GUY DRESSED ALL IN BLACK. He's looking for Lou Kinipski and by the way, he's a cop and wants to interrogate her. Uh oh....
AND THIS ENDS CHAPTER ONE. tbqh, this book is actually looking up to be on the entertaining side because despite the absolutely ridiculous premises and occasional crappy sentence and a name like LOU KINIPSKI, it's pretty well written so far and i'm really stoked to keep reading on.
this is only the first chapter. you guys, i'm so stoked to read and recap this because HOW DOES THIS BOOK EXIST? MY FACE IS JUST LIKE NADINE'S RIGHT NOW.