(no subject)
Joe Fox
4/10/08
New Play
CHARACTERS
Onstage:
CHARLOTTE
JOHN
Video:
ROBERT - Charlotte’s husband.
NATHAN - Charlotte’s son.
STEPHEN - Nathan’s best friend.
SETTING
(It begins in absolute darkness. Only a few shapes, and a figure sitting down, can be seen.)
CHARLOTTE
(onstage)
Again.
(The projector whirs and springs to life, illuminating the huge screen at the back of the stage. After a second or two of white noise, a scene appears. It appears to be a bright, summer day, but the camera is pointing awkwardly down at the ground, revealing freshly cut grass and a woman’s feet.)
CHARLOTTE
Now?
ROBERT
Yeah, there it goes. The light came on.
CHARLOTTE
Okay. Nathan!
(The camera sweeps up, revealing a nicely decorated yard. A young boy, about nine years old, sits at a picnic table, eating a burger.)
Nathan, show us what grandmom sent you!
(The boy shrinks away from the camera, covering his face.)
NATHAN
Aww, mom, no!
CHARLOTTE
Come on, Nathan!
ROBERT
Come on, buddy. Let’s see it.
NATHAN
Do I have to?
ROBERT
We’ll make a deal. If you show us, I’ll stop letting her in the house.
CHARLOTTE
Robert!
(The camera lowers slightly, pointing at the ground again.)
She’s my mother!
ROBERT
Well, that’s not your fault.
NATHAN
Alright, alright...
(The camera quickly swings back up to NATHAN, showing him jamming a yellow and red cap with propeller onto his head, pouting. MAN and WOMAN can be heard trying not to laugh. NATHAN pouts even more, looking down at his burger.)
CHARLOTTE
Oh, Nathan... smile!
(NATHAN smiles, reluctantly, as his parents continue to speak.)
We’re not going to make you wear it any more than you have to… just when grandmom comes over.
ROBERT
Sorry, Nate. It’s your mother’s house too.
(The camera swings over to reveal MAN.)
CHARLOTTE
What is THAT supposed to mean?
(MAN smirks and shrugs his shoulders.)
ROBERT
Uh… I don’t… Well, you know.
CHARLOTTE
Maybe I don’t.
ROBERT
Well… Nate! Want another burger?
NATHAN
Can I take this stupid hat off?
ROBERT
I don’t know. Can you?
NATHAN
MAY I take this hat off?
(The camera moves between MAN and NATHAN, both looking hopefully at the camera.)
ROBERT
I don’t know. Charlotte?
CHARLOTTE
Wha-… I… don’t you dare put me in that position.
ROBERT
Honey-
CHARLOTTE
The two of you always team up on me.
ROBERT
He’s my son…
CHARLOTTE
He’s my son too, Robert.
NATHAN
Mom!
ROBERT
We’re not fighting with you.
CHARLOTTE
It’s frustrating, Robert.
ROBERT
We’re not trying to/ bother you, honey.
NATHAN
Mom!!
CHARLOTTE
I know. I know. You have to understand/ that-
ROBERT
/I do.
CHARLOTTE
You have to understand how much it drives me/ crazy.
NATHAN
/Mom!!!
CHARLOTTE
What, Nathan?
NATHAN
I’m taking the hat off.
CHARLOTTE
You don’t need my permission!
STEPHEN
Nathan!
(The camera pans over to the gate, and a boy about NATHAN’s age is seen drawing closer.)
Hi, Mr. And Mrs. Chaudhari!
CHARLOTTE
Hello, Stephen.
ROBERT
Hey, Steve. Where’s your brother?
(NATHAN leaps up from the table and runs over to the gate, greeting STEPHEN. The camera goes off, and there are another few seconds of white noise. The next scene is inside a house, presumably a dining room. The room is dark, and full of kids. As we watch, MAN places a large cake, the candles lit, on the table.)
ROBERT
Everybody!
EVERYONE
Happy birthday to you!
STEPHEN
Dun dun dun.
EVERYONE
Happy birthday to you!
STEPHEN
Dun dun dun.
EVERYONE
Happy Birthday dear-
(Every individual offers their own name for NATHAN, with STEPHEN’s being “dofus-face.” NATHAN playfully punches STEPHEN’s arm.)
EVERYONE
Happy birthday to you!
ROBERT
You live in a zoo...
(A door opens onstage, and a figure ducks into the room.)
CHARLOTTE
Make a wish before you blow the candles out, Nathan.
JOHN
(Onstage)
Charlotte?
(NATHAN begins to blow out the candles.)
CHARLOTTE
(onstage)
Pause.
(The video freezes and the lights slowly come up on the stage. The room is rather uninviting. The walls are made of concrete, and there are sparse decorations. CHARLOTTE is sitting on a couch, her back to the audience. A man has entered the room, noticeably nervous.)
What?
JOHN
Hey, Charlotte... Ulysses asked me to tell you about a meeting at 0800 hours in the mess hall...
CHARLOTTE
This isn’t the military, John.
JOHN
I know.
CHARLOTTE
And it’s a dining room. A DINING ROOM.
JOHN
Well, whatever you want to call it, there’s a meeting in it in a few hours.
(beat.)
Okay?
(Beat.)
Charlotte!
CHARLOTTE
Okay, John.
(JOHN sighs and glances back at the screen, frozen on NATHAN blowing out his candles.)
JOHN
Your son’s birthday party, eh? How old was-
CHARLOTTE
Off.
(The screen goes black, and JOHN sighs again. He turns to leave the room.)
JOHN
I’m sorry, Charlotte. Just... have a little hope.
(CHARLOTTE doesn’t respond. JOHN meanders from the room, and the lights dim.)
CHARLOTTE
...Again.
SCENE 2
CHARACTERS
JEAN - Jean Pierre - Charlotte’s closest friend
AIKO - Harukawa Aiko - Young Japanese American woman
MS. WILCOT - Ms. Elsie Wilcott - elderly, God fearing woman.
ULYSSES - Army officer, occasional antagonist
CHARLOTTE - Charlotte Chaudhari
JOHN - Underling.
(JEAN, AIKO, and MS. WILCOTT are in the dining room, which is just as uninviting as the room with the screen. JEAN and MS. WILCOTT sit at the table. JEAN is half-heartedly reading a newspaper, while MS. WILCOTT is flipping through her bible. AIKO sits in the corner, frantically typing at a computer. She stops typing, stares at it for a few seconds, then slams her hands on the desk in frustration.)
AIKO
Dammit!
JEAN
Aiko, give it up.
(AIKO continues fooling with the computer, clicking the mouse rapidly.)
AIKO
God dammit.
MS. WILCOTT
Young lady, your language-
AIKO
Is atrocious. I know!
MS. WILCOTT
Do not raise your voice at me. The lord’s name is not to be taken in vain.
AIKO
“He” is not my god, Ms. Wilcott.
MS. WILCOTT
And THAT is precisely why we’re here. We have sinned, therefore, we have to watch the last days of the world as we know it.
AIKO
Ms. Wilcott, do you even listen to yourself?
JEAN
Cut it out, Aiko.
AIKO
The internet won’t work.
JEAN
It’s never going to work. There are more important things you could be doing.
AIKO
It was working yesterday.
(JEAN drops the newspaper, glowering at AIKO)
JEAN
How long were you online?
AIKO
Not long enough.
JEAN
Three minutes. And two of those three minutes were spent waiting for pages to load!
AIKO
Yeah, but it worked!
JEAN
For three minutes. You checked your Facebook.
AIKO
I had eight new notifications!
JEAN
Oh, our little celebrity! You couldn’t even check them. That was as far as you managed to get before we lost the connection.
(JEAN goes back to reading his newspaper.)
Three minutes to check absolutely anything, and you went to Facebook...
AIKO
Well, let’s consider the state of the world on the outside... What would you have checked, Jean?
(Beat. JEAN grunts and continues to read the newspaper. AIKO turns back to the computer. A few seconds pass.)
MS. WILCOTT
The Internet is the devil’s playground.
JEAN
Okay, Ms. Wilcott.
MS. WILCOTT
We all know why we’re here!
JEAN
Ms. Wil-
MS. WILCOTT
Forced to watch the world die around us, as we live forever, immortal... at least, until we run out of food and starve to death.
JEAN
Ms. Wilcott, please... try to keep a positive attitude, would you?
AIKO
(quietly)
At least that threat was rational...
(MS. WILCOTT glances up, nervous.)
MS. WILCOTT
What? It’s gone international?!
AIKO
(raising her voice)
I said, at least that threat was more rational than the bloody water and the locusts!
MS. WILCOTT
Oh, yes... Well, that too. Our hair will fall out in clumps, and our skin will be covered in boils, and Death Himself will come to collect us when everyone else is dead.
JEAN
This is not 1348, Ms. Wilcott. There is no Bubonic plague!
AIKO
I think we’d have seen some of these signs by now.
MS. WILCOTT
Why, no... because this is all happening on the surface!
AIKO
Good God.
MS. WILCOTT
And he will have you first, you heathen harlot! Then you will beg for forgiveness for your sins.
AIKO
I’m about to make YOU beg for forgiveness for my sins.
MS. WILCOTT
You wouldn’t dare lay a finger on me.
(JEAN stands up, preparing to break up the ensuing fight as ULYSSES enters the room.)
JEAN
No, she wouldn’t. Right, Aiko?
AIKO
Jean!
ULYSSES
Ladies and Gentlemen... ATTENTION!