Trial And Error 3/5

[thesockmonster]

It’s unsurprising when a few more families slip away during the cold nights, choosing to hide their shame at abandoning their pack in the darkness. The sunlight always exposes stripped out tents and a few less bodies during meals. Winters are always the worst and this one hasn’t even started properly. They’re suffering.

Any pack that shrinks too small is suddenly a target, ready for another pack to come in and sweep through. If an attacking pack wouldn’t pick and choose who they believe worthy enough to join them, leaving the others to be hunted or left behind, it wouldn’t be so terrifying a thought. But it’s a real threat and Baekhyun fears for them all.

He worries that Yixing and the others who came down from the mountain with him will realize this pack isn't worth sticking around for and they'll leave too. It's this fear that keeps Baekhyun hovering around Yixing even as he tries to bring the smile back to Chanyeol's face. Normalcy is what Baekhyun craves despite everything trying to fall apart around him.

Things like pack security weigh heavy on the pack council and the glimpses of his mother that Baekhyun catches are heartbreaking. He knows she is shouldering all she can and every time he tries, she pushes him away. She's chasing him away and he doesn't understand. It hurts. He promised her he'd always be there to protect her, but how can he when she doesn't want him to?

All he can do is lean on those around him, hoping that he's of some use. Perhaps if he'd been born an alpha, he'd be qualified to be The Alpha and they would have never been in this position.

Joonmyun is a constant. At first he was hesitant, reserved when Baekhyun would sit too near to Chanyeol, but he'd join him anyway. It's getting better. The weeks are dragging on, this dread in Baekhyun growing with them and he feels so stretched thin. Joonmyun notices and so does Jongin. The two of them gang up on Baekhyun all the time now until he feels better.

The first snowfall brings with it an overdue happiness that takes over the camp. Everyone, from the oldest to the youngest, bounds out into the fluffy white piles, yipping and playing and darting around. Snowballs fly through the air and Baekhyun screeches when one hits his neck and the snow slips down the back of his shirt to trail down his spine.

He turns, prepared for vengeance when he spies the glint in Yixing's eyes. Undeterred, Baekhyun barrels on, knocking the alpha onto the ground and shoving a handful of snow right down the front of his pants. Baekhyun is left cackling on a snow pile after Yixing nearly popped into wolf form and rushed off.

"That wasn't nice," Chanyeol laughs, plopping down beside Baekhyun on the snowy ground. He drapes one arm over Baekhyun's shoulders. Baekhyun really looks at Chanyeol. He'd lost weight right after his parents had left, but he's gained most of it back. There's color in his cheeks and he seems happier. Lighter.

"He deserved it," Baekhyun defends. "Probably."

"He's not going to end up like me, is he?" Chanyeol asks after a few moments of silence.

When Baekhyun peers over at him, he seems reserved, almost sad. "What do you mean?"

"Yixing has chosen you," Chanyeol states, leaving Baekhyun to nearly choke on a sharp intake of frigid air. "Everyone can see it. Do you? Would you accept him if he asked?"

Baekhyun's heart is pitter-pattering and his stomach ties itself into a knot of nerves. He swallows, letting out a calming breath. "If he asked to court me, I would say yes."

"I think he might be the only alpha I've ever met who could put up with you," Chanyeol teases, earning himself an elbow in the ribs.

"You're no prize either," Baekhyun grunts, face scrunched in distaste.

Chanyeol makes a noise of dissent, reaching out to drag his fingers through the snow. "I'm the best catch," he preens. "It's not my fault you can't see it."

"I'm sure someone will appreciate your special kind of weird," Baekhyun soothes. "One day."

Chanyeol is quick when he locks his arm around Baekhyun's neck just enough to keep him from getting away. Baekhyun finds himself unable to squirm his way free, pouting and digging his heels into the ground to push his weight around. It doesn't work so well when the snow is slippery beneath his feet. Chanyeol laughs and Baekhyun finally gives up.

"If you're not nice to an omega, you'll never earn the affections of one," Baekhyun wheezes.

Chanyeol pinches Baekhyun on the side. "It's a good thing you adore me so much already."

"Gross."

The snow doesn't stay for long; it never does. But the atmosphere it created sticks around, lingering in the air. Everyone keeps their furs tucked tight around them, save for a few of the alphas from the mountain pack. Including Yixing. Nothing seems to faze him and Baekhyun considers it unfair.

Baekhyun is crouched low near to the fire, debating whether or not he wants to risk the chill from the ground seeping through to numb his butt like last night. He's not given a choice when, moments later, Sehun rushes over and knocks Baekhyun directly onto his butt before sitting beside Baekhyun, legs draped over Baekhyun's lap.

Baekhyun has half a mind to push him away, but Sehun is rearranging their furs to cover them both and there's a serious set to his face. It's dark out and the flames flicker brightly, their shadows dancing over the bridge of Sehun's nose and caressing over his cheeks. He's younger than Baekhyun, but it looks as if this past year has aged him more than it should have.

A shiver runs through Sehun and Baekhyun clutches the furs closer to them, shifting as close to Sehun as he can in this position. Sehun is all gangly limbs that he’s starting to grow into, but he’s still such a pup, curling in for Baekhyun to rub down his back comfortingly. It’s nice that Sehun still has time for Baekhyun given that he’s been mostly with Jongin and those two alphas. It worries Baekhyun that Sehun’s become so attached to them. It will only lead to heartbreak.

“Your face is going to get stuck that way,” Sehun comments, poking Baekhyun in the cheek. “You look ugly when you frown.”

“Is that what you came all the way over here to say?” Baekhyun scoffs.

“Jongin abandoned me to go on a search for food and I got cold, so I’m here for your body heat.”

Baekhyun rolls his eyes. Sehun’s such a brat, but Baekhyun loves him anyway.

“But really, you look ugly when you frown.”

Baekhyun might not love Sehun that much.

“You only seem to really smile around Yixing these days.”

This gets Baekhyun’s attention and his head snaps up, eyes wide as he stares at a grinning Sehun.

“Don’t worry. I don’t think anyone else is paying as much attention except Yixing. It’s good.” Sehun nudges Baekhyun lightly.

Baekhyun chews his lip, a bit flustered because, yes, he’s been spending more time with Yixing lately and opening up more to the possibility that he wants to keep Yixing permanently, but being called out makes him feel exposed. “I don’t know how to do this,” Baekhyun whispers.

“It’s easy - you like him, he likes you, then you mate!”

“That’s ridiculously simplified,” Baekhyun snorts.

“It’s only complicated if you make it complicated.”

Baekhyun blinks at Sehun, surprised. “When did you grow up?”

Sehun beams at him, then pushes his head forward because he is forever going to want Baekhyun to scratch his head. So maybe he’s not entirely grown up. Baekhyun doesn’t mind so much. It’s such a normal, instinctive thing that it’s easy to just relax and stare into the fire. His mind goes blank and Sehun lists against him, sighing happily.

Sehun doesn’t move again until Minseok and Luhan approach. He’s not even looking at them, but Baekhyun feels when Sehun senses them, blinking sleepily up at the pair of alphas. Even Baekhyun wants to coddle Sehun when he looks so adorable and it’s inevitable that Minseok gently lifts Sehun to his feet as Luhan procures Sehun’s fur for him. Sehun flashes Baekhyun a satisfied smile before fitting himself between the alphas and walking off.

Baekhyun watches until they disappear toward where Minseok and Luhan have their tent. His attention is only drawn away when he takes in a whiff of Yixing who is now standing over him.

“What would I have to barter to get my head scratched like that?” His head is tilted, hair falling in his eyes and he looks so soft, so comfortable and sincere.

“Your body heat,” Baekhyun demands, holding his lone fur open for Yixing to fit under with him.

There’s no hesitation as Yixing fills the spot next to Baekhyun, huddling close. Every one of Baekhyun’s senses is oriented on the alpha and oh his mouth is watering and all he wants is to bury his face in Yixing’s neck. Instead, he gently tugs Yixing sideways to get to his hair. The strands are soft, flowing easily through Baekhyun’s fingers. Yixing lets out this sigh, leaning more of himself against Baekhyun until he’s slipping and his head is directly in Baekhyun’s lap.

Baekhyun looks down at the alpha, heart skipping several beats at the smile oriented at him. It’s so tempting to lean down, to steal a kiss, but Baekhyun doesn’t. He resumes scratching Yixing’s head while Yixing turns to push his face to Baekhyun’s belly. He thinks he imagines the way Yixing breathes him in, but he can’t ignore the race of heat that zips through him after.

He’s suffocating, drowning, unable to claw to the surface because he doesn’t want to. Baekhyun is content knowing that he’s sinking into Yixing and this time, he’s not going to talk himself out of it. Yixing is warm, curving his arm around Baekhyun’s waist and nuzzling against Baekhyun’s stomach even further. Baekhyun scratches and watches as Yixing’s eyes slip closed and his breathing evens.

He’s asleep.

And Baekhyun never wants him to leave.

The crick in Baekhyun's neck the next morning is totally worth it. He'd fallen asleep slumped over Yixing despite how low the temperature had dropped. They'd been warm in their little cocoon and Baekhyun only vaguely remembers being led back to his tent, clinging to Yixing before his presence had been replaced with Joonmyun's.

Joonmyun is still wrapped around Baekhyun from behind, his leg twisted between Baekhyun's and an arm slung over his chest. It's tempting to stay inside the tent all day. Screw the cold weather. Baekhyun can hear the droplets of rain hitting faintly on the outside of the tent and if there's one thing Baekhyun hates more than being cold, it's being cold and wet.

On rainy winter days, the pack usually stays inside excepting the rotating guards who try to keep the fire lit and run the perimeter to ensure nothing is attempting to encroach on the camp for shelter or food. It's a job for the alphas which leaves Baekhyun content to listen to the quiet noises Joonmyun makes in his sleep. Later, most of the omegas will probably crowd into someone’s tent for company and food, but for now, he’s perfectly comfortable.

He doesn't mean to think about Yixing, but everything seems to circle back to the alpha nowadays. Baekhyun can't complain when the attention he receives has his wolf howling in delight. He'd never really given much thought to how much satisfaction he would glean just from something as simple as scratching Yixing's head or watching him fall asleep in his lap, knowing he'd been the reason Yixing was so content.

Baekhyun closes his eyes and smiles to himself, his chest tight and the memory of how peaceful Yixing looked in his sleep playing on the back of his eyelids. A quiet whisper goes unheard, Baekhyun drifting off to thoughts of Yixing until his name is called again. Louder.

He startles, blinking groggily, glaring as menacingly as he can at the door to his tent. He's in no mood to be disturbed. Unless, of course, it's Yixing.

And it's Yixing.

All Baekhyun sees is a head of damp hair littered with glittering rain drops and then Yixing is peering over at him with a smile. The imprint of Yixing's furs still run in red lines down the side of his face and Baekhyun's heart squeezes fondly. Yixing doesn't say anything when he notices Joonmyun still sleeping, so he crooks his fingers and Baekhyun follows without thinking as if Yixing had a physical hold on him and dragged him out himself.

It's freezing outside. He immediately regrets every decision in his life that has led to this moment. His breaths come out in stuttering white puffs and he violently shivers, wanting nothing more than to crawl back into his tent. Honestly, screw Yixing.

Baekhyun is openly glaring at Yixing through narrowed eyes and the alpha still has the audacity to look pleased at himself. He reaches out and takes Baekhyun's hand, the one he was about to use to smack Yixing upside the head, and laces their fingers, tugging Baekhyun forward.

He finds himself stumbling after Yixing, unable to pull away or resist in any way. It's a little terrifying how much of a hold Yixing has on Baekhyun, but isn't that how things are supposed to be? Isn't Baekhyun supposed to want to follow his chosen mate anywhere?

Yixing takes them into the forest and the rain no longer makes it through. But the damage is done. Baekhyun is a soaking wet, shivering mess and he's unhappy about it. "There had better be a good reason you're risking me getting frostbite," Baekhyun threatens through his chattering teeth.

Of all the answers or reactions Baekhyun had anticipated, Yixing stepping forward and enveloping him in his arms, nose pushed to Baekhyun's hair and hands running up and down Baekhyun's back under his shirt, wasn't any of them. His toes curl in the damp leaves and he's still freezing, but he's also burning hot everywhere Yixing is touching.

"There's someplace I want to take you," he rumbles and Baekhyun nearly misses the words because of the pleasant vibrations in Yixing's chest. Yixing leans back, presumably for Baekhyun's answer, but said omega is still trying to catch his breath. "Your lips are blue," Yixing comments. And everything gets worse because he's running his thumb along Baekhyun's lower lip and Baekhyun whimpers, knees nearly giving out.

“Because you dragged me out,” Baekhyun complains, but there’s no emotion behind the words and he has this horrible urge to lean in to chase the touch.

Yixing licks over his own lips and Baekhyun thinks they’re about to have an Important Moment. Oh how he wants them to have an Important Moment.

Yixing drops his hands, stepping back and taking Baekhyun’s wrist. “Come on.”

The low burn of rejection that stings in Baekhyun's chest quickly gives way to butterflies as Yixing guides Baekhyun further into the trees. He's light on his feet although not as silent as Baekhyun as they weave their way through. Water still drips down, splattering unkindly on Baekhyun's already frozen skin and he scowls at the canopy.

The least Yixing could have done was let Baekhyun grab his furs before dragging him who knows where. He sighs, licking his cold lips and trying not to shiver too loudly as he focuses on Yixing's back. The idiot is still topless, but it does give Baekhyun a nice view. The muscles in his back shift under skin and Baekhyun wants to push against them, wants to touch so badly.

There are muted voices ahead; Baekhyun perks up at the sound and is pleasantly surprised when Yixing pulls him into the same clearing they'd spent a full moon in years ago. A fire has been built, far enough from the trees to not be a threat, but still protected from the rain by overhanging branches. Baekhyun is drawn to the warmth.

Yixing sits first, bringing Baekhyun with him. At this point, Baekhyun is trembling from the cold and Yixing fits himself behind Baekhyun, his legs pressed against Baekhyun's and arms around his waist to warm him up. The fire helps too.

On the other side of the flames, Minseok and Sehun are in a similar position although Sehun looks mostly asleep. Baekhyun wonders what kind of goading it took to get Sehun out of bed so early in the morning on such a dismal day. Sehun does crack his eyes open and offer Baekhyun a soft smile before he's nuzzling his head back against Minseok's neck.

"Sehun thought you might like this," Yixing murmurs. His mouth brushes the shell of Baekhyun's ear and the shiver that follows isn't because of the chill.

Baekhyun fights not to roll his eyes. He knows Sehun better than that. The sneaky omega was probably just scheming to get Baekhyun and Yixing away from everyone else, knowing that Baekhyun would be in danger of losing body parts to the cold and that Yixing would warm him up. He's going to have a few words with Sehun later. When he can feel his nose again.

"Did he also mention how much I hate the cold?" Baekhyun bites, eyes narrowed at a smug looking Sehun who most definitely is not asleep. If there was still snow on the ground, he'd lob a handful of it at the brat.

"I'll keep you warm," Yixing breathes.

Baekhyun smiles to himself, melting back against Yixing more. "Are you going to be my personal heater until spring?" he teases.

"Would you like me to be?"

Baekhyun hums, as if he's pondering his answer even as his heart leaps into his throat. "We'll have to see if you can keep me warm first."

"So this is a test?"

Baekhyun can feel Yixing's smile on his neck and he suppresses a shudder. "Yes."

Yixing makes Baekhyun feel safe, protected. It's a little piece in a much larger puzzle of how Baekhyun feels when he's around the alpha. It's almost as if he never had a choice. The wolf in him has decided Yixing is his and there's no getting away from it. Baekhyun isn't inclined to disagree.

He's probably going to be on the receiving end of Joonmyun's knowing looks when he makes it back, but for now, Baekhyun's going to indulge. He takes Yixing's larger hands in his own, running the tips of his fingers over rough palms and to his wrists before slotting their fingers together loosely.

The feeling slowly returns to his toes and face, allowing Baekhyun to relax and enjoy the scent of Yixing all around him. Even after being dragged through the cold, he could probably fall asleep in Yixing's arms.

He very nearly does, the dripping of rain along the leaves playing a lullaby, and the warmth of Yixing's body seeping into him to chase away the cold. It's not so bad when he has an alpha as a shield.

A howl pierces through the air and Baekhyun startles. Yixing chuckles and nudges Baekhyun's cheek with his nose.

"That's our cue to run perimeter," Minseok sighs, already peeling himself away from Sehun.

"You too?" Baekhyun questions even as Yixing begins extricating his limbs from Baekhyun's hold.

"We'll be back after."

Baekhyun is left sitting in front of the fire, freezing and scowling as Minseok and Yixing disappear into the trees. Their howls echo only moments after and Baekhyun sighs. He decides to crawl over to where Sehun is, pressing himself to Sehun's side. Sehun snuggles against him, head resting on Baekhyun's shoulder as they both stare at the crackling fire that provides the only warmth now.

Baekhyun's shirt is wet and the cold clings to it, but it's still probably better than having no shirt at all. Sehun, at least, is dry. Sehun wraps himself as much as he can around Baekhyun and they sit in silence. Baekhyun has to admit, begrudgingly, that this wasn't a bad idea. Even if it did come from Sehun.

“Baekhyun?” Sehun’s voice is timid, quiet, and Baekhyun would have missed it if Sehun hadn’t been so close. He hums in acknowledgement, sliding an arm around Sehun’s torso. “Do you ever feel funny around Yixing?”

Baekhyun rests his chin on the top of Sehun’s head. “Funny how?”

“Different.” He pauses, taking in a deep breath. “I’ve liked other alphas before, but none of them like this,” he whispers. “Even when I thought Chanyeol was the one, it was nothing like how it feels now.”

Baekhyun swallows over the thick taste in his mouth, beginning to rock side-to-side. “Like you’d crawl into his skin just to be closer,” Baekhyun answers, ignoring the churning in his stomach at the thought of Sehun falling for Minseok. Minseok already has a mate. How is he supposed to break that to Sehun without breaking Sehun?

“Just like that. Spring will be here before we know it.” Sehun twists, blinking up at Baekhyun. “I’ve made a pact.”

Baekhyun knows he probably looks silly with his mouth dropped open and his eyes wide. A pact is a big thing. They’re made in front of the Alpha - or the council in their case - between an omega and an alpha, officially stating that when the omega goes into heat, only that alpha is allowed to lay claim to him.

Baekhyun hasn’t even thought far enough ahead for a pact, but Sehun - sweet, sweet Sehun - has already made this adult decision. None of them - Baekhyun, Jongin, Sehun - have long before their first heat is going to hit and Spring is usually when it happens. It never really occurred to him that soon he was going to reach maturity. He's so used to the waves that hit him now and with the new members of the pack joining, he'd been preoccupied.

And then there's Yixing.

Is Baekhyun ready for that? He knows he’s not. Not right now anyway.

"Well are you going to say anything or just attract flies with your breath?" Sehun whines, lifting a finger to snap Baekhyun's mouth shut.

"I'm - it's great that you've found someone, Sehun." Baekhyun is suddenly struck with the knowledge that if Sehun's made a pact, then Minseok would have had to agree too. The entire thing is confusing.

"Someones," Sehun stresses. "Minseok and Luhan. The council said it was weird, but they'd allow it."

Sehun seems nervous, like he's afraid Baekhyun is going to scold him or tell him that what he's doing is wrong. Baekhyun only hugs him tighter. "It's not any weirder than you are already," he reassures the omega in his arms. "And I'm so happy that you snagged two alphas who spoil you rotten."

"What about you?"

Baekhyun pulls a face. "I don't want to be your mate. You're too much of a nag."

Sehun whines his name, laughing when he pushes his face into Baekhyun's chest like a petulant pup. "I meant Yixing. Are you two . . . ?"

Baekhyun sighs as he looks back at where Yixing had disappeared into the trees earlier. "I don't know what's going to happen with Yixing. But for now, things are nice.”

"Nice is good," Sehun comments. "But nice isn't enough when Yixing has the attention of so many omegas. He's a strong alpha, Baekhyun. The strongest out of all the alphas in the pack. Everyone knows he has an interest in you, but it won't keep the persistent omegas away for long. He's a catch and someone's going to reel him in. It should be you."

And yet another observation Baekhyun hadn’t made. When did Sehun get so smart and practical? Baekhyun sighs and tucks his head lower, cheek to cheek with Sehun. “Any advice? You’re the one here with romance experience. I don’t know what I’m doing.”

Sehun chuckles, sounding pleased with himself. “Yeah, grab him by the ears and pin him down. Don’t let him go no matter what.”

Baekhyun thumps Sehun on the arm and he flinches, making a pained noise.

“You asked,” he whines.

Yixing and Minseok don't come back for a while, and when they return, Baekhyun and Sehun are asleep. Baekhyun flinches when he feels someone pulling him from Sehun, only to relax when he scents Yixing. He prefers to chase the addicting aroma of alpha and presses close, curling up in Yixing's arms once they're back on their side of the fire.

Baekhyun's eyes open long enough to see Luhan emerging from the trees to silently join Minseok and Sehun. Sehun had just settled against Minseok, but now he's stretching out without opening his eyes until he's over both alphas.

An otherwise miserable day is suddenly made better and Baekhyun revels in the security that comes with Yixing and their little escape even if it's only for a while.

Baekhyun decides he’s going to take things up a notch now that he’s certain - mostly - that Yixing is interested in possibly courting him. He’s not going to do something outrageous like take Sehun’s advice or anything, but letting Yixing know that he’s open to the idea is a nice, easy way to start.

Too bad it doesn’t work.

The first time, Baekhyun is sitting comfortably on Yixing’s lap, facing the alpha. There are furs draped over Baekhyun to keep him warm and he’d been drifting off, but the idea of nosing his way up to Yixing’s mouth is far more tantalizing. He does it slowly, softly, just knowing he’s going to get the reaction he wants as Yixing’s fingers tighten their hold on his waist. Yixing’s breathing stutters and Baekhyun takes in the heady, thick scent of alpha to let it curl inside his skull. There’s no doubt anymore that he very much wants Yixing.

Baekhyun’s nose catches on Yixing’s jaw and his heart is threatening to squeeze through his ribs as Yixing shifts beneath him. There’s no one else around; the two of them had snuck out, hand-in-hand, to the clearing earlier when Yixing had demanded Baekhyun’s attention from where he’d been draped over Yifan’s back to soak up his body heat as Yifan tried to ignore his presence. Baekhyun rests his hand on Yixing’s neck, thumb pushing just under his jaw and Yixing inhales sharply.

Baekhyun looks at the alpha, knowing his eyes are a vibrant amber, and they meet red. Yixing bares his teeth, swallowing, and Baekhyun wants to climb him, tangle fingers in his hair and do exactly as Sehun said. His wolf is clawing at him to push Yixing to the ground and lick his way over every part of Yixing, leave bites and scratches that will gleam fresh under the sunlight for a few pulsing seconds before healing.

Baekhyun can taste his desire for Yixing on the tip of his tongue and he wants Yixing to taste it too. There’s a whine caught in his throat and Yixing’s nails have sharpened, digging unforgivingly into the soft skin of his waist. Baekhyun waits with bated breath for Yixing to lean in the small distance between them and kiss him.

Yixing’s eyes fade from red to brown, blinking his wolf away and Yixing stands suddenly, taking Baekhyun off guard. He startles, wrapping arms around the alpha before he’s gently set on his feet. “We should go back.”

Yixing doesn’t touch him as they walk to camp in silence and Baekhyun is left confused, stinging with a pain that feels far worse than rejection. Even Joonmyun appears perplexed when Yixing walks Baekhyun to their shared tent and leaves him there with nothing more than a whispered sleep well when it was clear Baekhyun had been hoping for more.

Yixing seems to keep his distance from Baekhyun for a few days after, and Baekhyun pines with a permanent pout to his features. Joonmyun tries to reassure him that Yixing probably didn’t want to do something Baekhyun hadn’t been ready for, but even his words begin to sound placating and hollow when he notices the way Yixing skirts around Baekhyun whenever he’s in sight.

The evening Yixing makes room for himself beside Baekhyun over dinner, the omega stares at him openly in shocked silence. Yixing simply reaches over and closes his mouth, instructing him to eat before digging into his own bowl. Baekhyun thinks that maybe Yixing had just needed time to sort himself out and everything will fall into place now.

Instead, the two of them crash into a brutal pattern that leaves Baekhyun trembling and weak, pawing at his face to stop the tears from spilling. Yixing will devote all his spare time and attention to Baekhyun, spoiling him and keeping him warm and ensuring that Baekhyun smells strongly of him. (Chanyeol jokes about how they might as well be mated with how Baekhyun reeks of Yixing and vice versa. He doesn’t realize how much it makes Baekhyun ache.)

But as soon as Baekhyun makes a move to take it a step further, Yixing is gone. He’ll disappear from Baekhyun’s side for days, only to reappear just as suddenly. He acts as if nothing's happened and Baekhyun is too weak to call him out on it. Yifan attempts to take up Yixing’s spot on the days he’s gone - trying to explain to Baekhyun that Yixing must have his reasons for what he’s doing. But Baekhyun had unintentionally snarled and Yifan never brought it up again. He simply remained as support with Jongin there to brace Baekhyun’s other side.

Yixing will be the first to volunteer to guard the omegas during their treks down to the river for laundry and he’ll carry Baekhyun’s basket for him. He’ll seek out Baekhyun first when he returns from a hunt, the blood of a fresh kill still stained down his chin to his chest and Baekhyun grabs the nearest thing - usually Joonmyun - to keep from hurling himself at Yixing and cleaning it all away with his tongue.

When the full moon comes around, Baekhyun tries to run off and play with Jongin and Sehun, but Yixing is there, barreling at him and nipping at his ears until Baekhyun bounds off with him instead. Somehow he always manages to find himself smothered underneath a large alpha wolf until dawn when said alpha walks him to his tent with this aura of self-satisfaction radiating off him. And Baekhyun doesn’t understand.

“I don’t know what I’m doing wrong,” Baekhyun complains petulantly, curling up against Joonmyun’s side. He takes comfort in his friend - the friend who carries the lingering smell of Chanyeol on his skin. Baekhyun’s not so wrapped up in himself and his worries with Yixing to not notice the way Chanyeol’s been finding excuses to talk to Joonmyun. Joonmyun’s been kind enough not to babble about how pleased he is that Chanyeol is paying him attention, but Baekhyun can tell.

“I don’t think the problem is you,” Joonmyun tries to assuage Baekhyun, cradling him in his arms.

“Then what is it?” Baekhyun grumps.

“Ask him,” Joonmyun suggests. “You two have the body language down to an art, but you don’t speak enough. Flat out ask him.”

Joonmyun making sense isn’t a new thing, but Baekhyun groans anyway, knowing he’s right. He’d been hoping to avoid a direct confrontation because an omega demanding anything of an alpha, even something as simple as an explanation, can be seen as too difficult to manage and not good for mating. He knows Yixing isn’t the type, but he also thought he knew what Yixing wanted and now he’s just left confused.

Baekhyun waits until he and Yixing are alone in their small clearing by the fire, Yifan having darted off with Jongin earlier under the pretense of bathing since the winds have died down. There’d been something odd about Jongin’s barely contained excitement, but Baekhyun had been too distracted with the questions clogging his throat.

Yixing is beside him, an arm loosely draped around Baekhyun’s waist and his hand underneath the fabric of Baekhyun’s shirt to stroke his skin comfortingly. It would have worked at any other time, but Baekhyun’s too wound up, wringing his hands as he waits for Yifan and Jongin’s footfalls to grow silent.

“You’re anxious,” Yixing observes. “You have been since I asked you to come out here.”

Baekhyun swallows, turning to see the alpha beside him. Yixing has his head tilted and his eyes are warm, sincere. Baekhyun almost bites his tongue, but this is too important. “I need to know why you won’t court me.”

There. That wasn’t so bad.

Yixing pulls away from Baekhyun, putting space between them and the momentary relief from getting it out in the open evaporates. “That wasn’t my intention.” His eyebrows are knit, a pained look on his handsome face and Baekhyun breathes out a stuttered sigh.

“It wasn’t your intention to court me?” Baekhyun demands angrily, hands balling into fists. If Yixing had never intended to court him, what has he been doing? An alpha doesn’t pay this much attention to an omega, going so far as to make him smell of him, and not court the omega. Not unless . . . his mother’s words ring in his ears. He wouldn't be the first alpha to keep his second choice close in case his first doesn't accept him.

“Am I a back up choice?” His vision blurs with tears of frustration and anger and he shifts back away from Yixing, shrinking in on himself.

“No!” Yixing exclaims, moving toward Baekhyun, but he stops when Baekhyun flinches. “You are second to none.”

“Then what are we doing?”

Yixing looks lost, only moments from running, but his fingers push into the ground to hold fast. His eyes go red and just as quickly return to normal as Baekhyun waits for an explanation. He’s so tired of always waiting for Yixing’s attention and feeling less than worthy at the end of the day.

“I tried to stay away from you,” Yixing finally admits. His voice is low, almost a whisper and his eyes are fixed on the grass by Baekhyun’s knees.

“Why?” Baekhyun needs to know why this is so hard. If an alpha and an omega want each other, what is there to stop them?

Yixing chews on his lip, his posture rigid and defensive. “It’s complicated.”

“Then uncomplicate it,” Baekhyun demands. “What is it about me that makes me unworthy of being yours?”

“Baekhyun,” Yixing pleads, eyes growing soft. “You are so much more than you think.”

“But not enough to be with you.”

“That’s not it.”

“Then tell me!” Baekhyun feels like his chest is about to explode, his wolf clawing to the surface to snap at Yixing for being so frustrating. Yixing is so still and Baekhyun yearns to lunge forward until he gets a real reaction from him. It’d be better than this.

“I can’t.”

“Why?” The least he owes Baekhyun is an explanation.

“Because,” Yixing snarls, eyes flashing with the reflection of the flames glinting fiercely.

“That’s not good enough.”

“It’s all I have.”

Baekhyun stares at Yixing, pain dripping into his lungs until he’s drowning in it. He never should have allowed himself to get so close. He should have taken that first rejected kiss as a sign and moved on. Any other alpha would be better than one who plays games with him. “Fine.” Baekhyun’s voice is far more steady than his heart, the sound of blood rushing loud in his ears. “I’ll make it easy for you. I don’t want you near me. Don’t seek me out, don’t speak to me and don’t sit with me.”

“Baekhyun,” Yixing growls, but Baekhyun is already on his feet, furs clutched tight to himself for protection from the cold. And from Yixing. Yixing bares his teeth, canines sharp and threatening.

Baekhyun turns on his heel and leaves as quickly as his feet will carry him. It's hard to breathe and he has to pause, resting his weight on the trunk of a tree as he pulls in deep breaths that chill him to the bone. He'd never expected such a reaction from Yixing. Perhaps Baekhyun had been deluding himself into thinking he was more special than he actually was.

Baekhyun's pride is smarting, but the rejection puts a new perspective on things.

Just because he isn't good enough for some alpha to pant over doesn't mean he can't be happy. Baekhyun doesn't need anyone to be happy except himself. He refuses to let this one disappointment shake his foundations. He was perfectly content with his lot in life before Yixing and he will not let the stupid alpha change it.

As far as Baekhyun is concerned, there is no one in the pack by the name of Yixing.

Winter fades peacefully into a much anticipated Spring. Along with the beginnings of warmer winds and the budding flowers blossoming through the fields, comes Sehun’s first heat. It strikes while he’s playing around with Jongin, the two of them wrestling as they usually do. Joonmyun scents it before anyone else, rushing to Baekhyun’s side with wide eyes.

“Find Luhan and Minseok,” he instructs, his gaze flickering around the area to ensure there are no alphas around. “Sehun’s going to realize it soon and he’ll need them.”

Baekhyun sprints back toward the camp without hesitation, worry clinging to him as he searches for one of the two alphas. They’re usually together, but this time, Baekhyun finds Luhan without Minseok. His steps falter only briefly when he notices that Luhan is talking with Yixing. He pushes down the fluttering of his heart and bounds over to the pair, glancing only briefly at a surprised Yixing.

“Sehun,” Baekhyun breathes, which gets Luhan’s immediate attention. “He’s beginning his heat.”

Luhan’s eyes grow wide. “Where?”

“He’s out in the field with Jongin.”

Luhan thanks Baekhyun as he runs off, probably in search of Minseok. Baekhyun is left staring at where Luhan disappeared, a vice grip clenched tight around his heart. Sehun has two alphas who clearly care for him very much to be there for him and the jealousy creeps up before Baekhyun can squash it down. He’s happy for Sehun, truly, but his friend’s happiness stands a contrast to his own bad luck with romance.

Still, Baekhyun thinks, it's not enough to break his resolve. Just because his wolf senses the proximity of Yixing doesn't mean Baekhyun is going to crack and give in. The last two full moons have been hard; Baekhyun hadn't realized how much of his life he'd allotted to the alpha until he'd cut Yixing out.

Joonmyun had told him he'd been acting childish, but then he'd also comforted Baekhyun and backed him up if Yixing was too near. As Chanyeol is a loyal friend, he's been hovering nearer to Baekhyun, although that could also be attributed to Joonmyun's presence. The alpha isn't subtle in his staring and Joonmyun notices, but chooses not to acknowledge it.

"He'll come to me when he's ready," Joonmyun had explained. Baekhyun had pulled a face that had Joonmyun laughing. "Watch him," Joonmyun had then instructed. "He still steals glances at Jongin too. He's not ready."

Joonmyun's words were true, but not as true now as they had been then. The warm weather seems to be drying out the stale and letting in the new. Life is revived, refreshed and Baekhyun sits back as the pack does as well as it can with the remaining members. They'd lost a half dozen families over the Winter - nearly as many as had come in from the mountain pack.

Baekhyun watches as some of the younger omega and alpha children weave through the tents, giggling and chasing after each other without a care. His heart feels heavy and yet he's smiling as one falls and the others rush back to pick him up and brush the grass from his hair. They take off again and Baekhyun sighs wistfully.

As an omega, it was always a foregone conclusion that he'd have children of his own one day, but now he's not so sure. He's young, yes, but no other alpha has drawn his interest the way Yixing had. (And still does if he's honest with himself, but Baekhyun hates being honest when it comes to Yixing and all those pesky emotions still tied up with the alpha.)

It's been over two full moons since Baekhyun walked away from Yixing and it's no easier to walk away from him now. He can feel Yixing's eyes on him and they burn until Baekhyun is out of sight. He heads back to the field, pausing when he sees a red-faced Sehun panting into Minseok's neck as the alpha leads him back to their tent, Luhan on their heels, his hand linked with Sehun's as the omega whines.

Joonmyun appears a bit frazzled when Baekhyun makes it back to where the man is now laying in the grass. "How'd it go?" Baekhyun asks, plopping his bottom down right on Joonmyun's thighs. The omega sits up and immediately pushes his head under Baekhyun's chin. It's instinctive for Baekhyun to start scratching through Joonmyun's hair even if this is the first time Joonmyun has done this. Usually it's Sehun or Jongin and occasionally Yifan who knocks Baekhyun over in his attempts for affection.

"He got pretty bad really fast," Joonmyun grumbles. His arms wrap around Baekhyun's waist and he sighs. "Poor thing was about to rip his clothes off by the time Minseok and Luhan showed up. Have you ever tried to wrestle with an omega in heat? It's not fun."

Baekhyun rests his cheek on the top of Joonmyun’s hair, scraping his nails over the sides of Joonmyun’s head now. “You can’t get worn out on me now,” he jokes. “You have to be there for when I inevitably go into heat too. I’m going to need my Joonmyun.”

Joonmyun pinches Baekhyun’s side and he squeals, twisting to the side until the pair of them are on the ground.

"Are you going to ignore him forever?" Yifan asks one morning over breakfast.

Baekhyun is purposely obnoxious as he chews the meat in his mouth, smacking his lips after he swallows. "Who?" he inquires innocently.

Yifan gives Baekhyun a stern look that cracks because Jongin is trying - and failing - to stifle his laughter on Yifan's other side. Instead, Yifan knocks his knuckles against Baekhyun's head with a fond sigh. "You shouldn't be so hard on him."

Baekhyun sets his bowl down and turns so he can throw his legs over Yifan's lap. Yifan has to scramble to keep his own bowl from being knocked to the ground. Jongin grabs at Baekhyun's ankles and pulls until Baekhyun is perched entirely on one of Yifan's thighs. He feels so much higher suddenly.

"Give me a reason not to be hard on him and I might consider it," Baekhyun answers, letting out soft, high pitched noise because Jongin is tickling the bottom of his foot.

Yifan goes silent and slumps. Jongin pats his back and Baekhyun feels mildly bad that he's being stubborn, but only because it's oriented at Yifan when it's Yixing who deserves it all. It's admirable that Yifan is stepping in for his friend; Yifan is good people and Jongin is lucky to have him around now that Sehun is otherwise occupied.

Sehun had crawled his way out of the tent he now shares with his mates a few days ago, flanked by Minseok and Luhan, and with a fresh claim mark on both sides of his neck. Baekhyun could smell them even from a distance as the three disappeared in the direction of the river to bathe. Sehun’s heat had taken three days, which was on the short side for a first time. Minseok and Luhan are probably the reason for that.

Baekhyun isn’t looking forward to his own maturity. He’s been taught about the changes his body is going to go through and how he’ll react and the best way to handle it, but now that it’s here, he’d rather stay as he is. The idea of having even less control of himself than he already has is terrifying. And knowing he has to do it alone is worse.

Stupid Yixing.

He leans all his weight on Yifan and occasionally steals bites of his food as Jongin feeds him because Baekhyun is still spread out on Yifan’s lap. It’s a comfortable lap. It’s not as comfortable as Yixing’s, but nothing can compare to the warmth and security that comes with Yixing’s chest against Baekhyun’s back, his arms secure around his waist. Baekhyun whines softly without meaning to and the pitiful look Jongin gives him only makes Baekhyun feel worse.

It eats away at him, this not knowing exactly why Yixing acted the way he did. He’d never given an answer and all his actions ever did was leave the omega confused over where he stood. Some days he feels good about the decision he's made. Letting Yixing have so much pull over him when they weren’t even courting was unhealthy. If it had been leading somewhere, it would have been different. On other days, Baekhyun thinks that maybe he missed something and demanding that the alpha keep away from him hadn't been the right way to end it.

Baekhyun’s mother walks by and Baekhyun feels ten times worse. She doesn’t appear to be doing well, but she’s stubborn. Even after he’d apologized to her for running out, and after he’d offered to move back in because it couldn’t be healthy being alone through the winter, she’d refused. She’d told him how happy she was that he’d grown into an admirable young man with his own mind and then shooed him out after combing down a few wayward strands of his hair.

Baekhyun worries for her. He worries for himself. He worries for the pack. At this rate they have one more winter left. Perhaps two if they’re lucky. He’s been told again and again not to worry himself with it - that the council is handling it - but Baekhyun can’t help it. He can’t stand the idea of being split up, of not calling everyone he’s grown up with family, pack. (He does imagine it sometimes, late at night, wondering if he’d find someone he could call mate in a new pack. He’d be away from Yixing and everything that twists in his gut at the thought of him and Baekhyun could finally move on. Those are the nights that he hates himself and ends up curling around Joonmyun protectively for hours before he can fall asleep.)

The river waters are still cold, but not cold enough to keep Baekhyun from taking a refreshing dip to clear his head. And to shake loose all the bits of leaves in his hair from when he’d been rushing through the trees earlier with Sehun. Baekhyun crooks his fingers and Sehun comes splashing up, ducking his head enough for Baekhyun to get to his hair. He’s more of a mess than Baekhyun, still smiling and panting from the exertion. They’d ended their frolicking by darting to the river and diving in, clothing and all.

Now their pants and shirts are in a sopping pile on the bank. Sehun is much taller than Baekhyun and yet he still shrinks down to let Baekhyun groom him. The only real difference between before and now is the twin marks that stand proud on both sides of Sehun’s neck. Curiously, Baekhyun runs the tips of his fingers over one, expecting to feel scarred, raised skin. He’s met with no resistance, no bumps or imperfections. Just the impression of teeth lighter than the rest of Sehun’s skin.

“Did it hurt?” Baekhyun asks.

Sehun’s face goes through a series of expressions, all of which are amusing, before he settles with a scrunched nose and his lips in a thin line. “It’s hard to explain,” he begins, reaching up to pull a stray leaf from Baekhyun’s hair. “I was hurting before the bite, but not a bad hurt. Just a . . . like a craving only it’s the only thing you can focus on. I wanted it so much and when he bit me, it was - it was a split second of pain, but after . . . “ There’s a wistful look on Sehun’s face now and a faint dusting of pink over his cheeks. “It felt like everything shifted into place. It wasn’t any different when Minseok bit me too. It felt just as right.”

Baekhyun coos, pinching Sehun’s cheeks until the omega is pushing away. “You’re so cute. It’s no wonder they fell into your web.”

“Baekhyun,” Sehun whines with a pout, batting at him without any strength. The tips of Sehun’s ears have gone red and even if he’s considered mature, an adult by wolf standards, Baekhyun will always see him as a pup.

The pair splash in the waters, pausing to scrub off patches of dirt, until they’re interrupted by a group of alphas who had the same idea. Chanyeol seems to be the leader of this particular rabble, which comes as a surprise to no one. He belly flops in the water and Baekhyun winces, hoping Chanyeol is out of the way because Zitao, Kyungsoo and Jongdae are right on his heels, leaping into the river behind him. Chanyeol looks half drowned when he resurfaces, finally noticing the two omegas who are staring at the new additions.

Chanyeol tips forward and flounders, his head nearly disappearing even if the water is only waist deep on him. He’s trying to get over to them and Baekhyun steps back, bumping into Sehun who is scrambling toward the shore. “Baek,” Chanyeol sputters. “You should probably -” A loud splash cuts Chanyeol off and he winces. Baekhyun peers around Chanyeol to see Yixing’s head popping up, followed by the rest of him. “Go,” Chanyeol finishes weakly.

He’s rooted on the spot, eyes glued to Yixing’s chest as rivulets of water curve over the hard lines of muscle until they meet with the water. Baekhyun swallows, his breathing labored as if he’s still running and when Yixing looks over and notices him, Baekhyun nearly whimpers. Yixing’s face falls immediately, his soft smile now turned down and his eyes sad, hollow. It looks like he wants to speak, but before he can, Baekhyun is moving away as quickly as he can. He doesn’t even make it to his clothes on the bank before his wolf has taken over.

It’s not easy pulling himself out of the water on four legs, but at least he’s covered as he darts into the trees to escape. Guilt plucks at him and Baekhyun is angry that he feels guilty for Yixing’s pain because the alpha had brought it on himself. Huffing, Baekhyun lopes back to the camp and to his tent for dry clothes and, hopefully, Joonmyun’s company to soothe his unsteady heart.

“Baekhyun!”

Baekhyun flinches when he feels the weak smack on his muzzle after he’s nosed his way into his tent. Joonmyun drops to his knees, immediately reaching out, guilt plain on his face.

“I’m so sorry,” he squeaks. “I didn’t mean it!”

Baekhyun shifts back to his human form, shaking his damp hair out of his face. “Then why did you do it?” he complains, fingers rubbing over his smarting nose.

“Because you were dripping all over everything,” Joonmyun answers with a pout.

That’s when Baekhyun notices it. The tent is clean.

The tent is clean.

Never once has Baekhyun seen the inside of their tent clean. The wooden shelves off to the side are filled with their folded clothing, the top now home to all the small wooden figurines Joonmyun carves when he has time. The furs that lay as a floor covering have been cleaned and Baekhyun is gawking.

“What -?”

“I get this way before my heat,” Joonmyun confesses, plopping down on the rearranged bed of furs they share. “I get antsy and I can’t stop nesting.” Poor Joonmyun rubs at his eyes and he slumps to the side, staring blankly ahead. “It’ll probably be tonight,” he sighs. “If not, then definitely tomorrow.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Baekhyun offers as he crawls over to Joonmyun to cuddle. This close, Baekhyun can pick up on the slight change to his scent. He’s much sweeter and it sticks to the roof of Baekhyun’s mouth.

“If you could check on me during, I’d like that,” Joonmyun rumbles. “Make sure I eat and drink because sometimes I forget.”

Baekhyun wraps an arm around Joonmyun’s waist from behind, face pushed to the back of Joonmyun’s neck. “What if Chanyeol comes by? Should I . . . ?”

Joonmyun fidgets, but stills after a few moments. He shakes his head. “Don’t let him in. He’s not ready and I don’t want my heat to push him before he is.”

Baekhyun nods. “Okay,” he whispers. “Okay.”

It hits before they’re about to sleep for the evening. Joonmyun is curled in on himself, facing away from Baekhyun, which is already a bad sign. But when he starts softly panting and clawing at the furs, Baekhyun knows it’s time. He hadn’t realized how strong Joonmyun’s scent had become until he walks out of their tent and the fresh air hits him in the face.

It’s also rather unfortunate that Chanyeol bumps into Baekhyun first and Baekhyun can see how Chanyeol’s pupil’s dilate instantly. “No,” Baekhyun says firmly. “If I see you anywhere near my tent, I will have the other alphas tie you to the thickest tree in the forest and leave you there for the birds to pick at.”

Chanyeol is still sniffing around and Baekhyun has to snap his fingers to get Chanyeol to focus. “No,” he commands a second time and Chanyeol visibly deflates. Baekhyun sighs, taking pity on the alpha and grabbing his hand. “Come on, you can help me get water and food for him for later.”

Baekhyun rethinks his position the moment Chanyeol stiffens, nearly dropping the jug of water in his hands because Joonmyun had moaned loud enough to be heard outside the tent. The alpha goes white-knuckled, sucking in his breath and holding out the jug for Baekhyun to take so he doesn’t have to step any further. The moment Chanyeol’s hands are free, he’s skittering away like a scared pup and Baekhyun carries on without him.

This isn’t the first time Baekhyun’s taken care of an unmated omega while they’re in their heat cycle. Every omega of age will go into heat during Spring and he’s seen his fair share of them in the throes of it, completely lost. Joonmyun laying naked, legs spread wide on the furs, covered in sweat with his eyes squeezed shut isn’t so bad compared to others that Baekhyun’s aided.

Thankfully, Joonmyun still possesses his wits enough to eagerly accept the water that Baekhyun tips toward his bitten lips.

Joonmyun whimpers, his fingers twisting in Baekhyun’s shirt. “You smell like Chanyeol,” he groans in a scratchy voice.

“Sorry,” Baekhyun whispers, slinking away. He hadn’t thought about that; he’d just wanted to give Chanyeol something to do so he’d feel like he was helping Joonmyun. “I’ll be back in the morning,” he promises. Joonmyun gives a low grunt of acknowledgement and Baekhyun slips out of the tent.

He’d already spoken with his mother about staying with her while Joonmyun goes through his heat. It’s different to have her near him again, sleeping soundly with her mouth open and face relaxed. Baekhyun watches her sleep, wishing he’d been a better son for her. Wishing that he’d been the alpha their pack and her need.

PART FOUR