I haven't picked up a pen in a month. Haven't worked out in a month. Haven't found one new band in two months. Took me a whole 2 weeks to finally paint my jaded nails. I'm exhausted. Always. Perpetually. Indelibly. I fall asleep standing up, sitting down, working, driving, thinking. I have 9 hours of energy per day. The rest lapses into a siege of ( Read more... )

I buried my voice beneath the ocean crest ( Read more... )

right now, I'd give anything to feel wanted, loved, appreciated; physically. with an attentive, obsequious fawning that only one as desperately romantic as I could portray. I'm tired of being so perfectly alone all the time. I've met a few people recently, special people; as special as an exoskeleton of blood, skin, and water can get. one, no less ( Read more... )

we were a loving pair of tongues in the fleecy arms of morning, golden with its tenor and zeal, upon a coverlet of sunshine and fresh honeydew. our mouths, an alcove of melting, with a loving pair of tongues naked and fleshed out like two seasons, summer and spring, living.we spoke in hopeless beauty with shimmering eyes and inclined heads, ( Read more... )

she arrived a fortnight late of seventeen, a lightyear within the footfalls lore. the cloak-and-dagger velvetine-hooded, blonde-tusseted mistress estranged to the sounds of youth. excuse me ma'am, but upon this road of wretched soil and anise earth, I'm alone. I'm but a child. a road-scarred siege such as yourself with an inclined hand would lend ( Read more... )

a meat-eaten hand ( Read more... )

tonight I walked into barnie's coffee and they were playing the low level owl vol. 1 cd. you know, that little band called the appleseed cast who just happens to be my favorite band? I asked this one girl whose it was. she was the owner of a mean face, a haughty response, and thoroughly dismissive eyes. dissuaded, I turned away. then the other girl ( Read more... )

trying to keep track of thoughts and feelings
learning to lose track of time

my world is a shameless myriad, a vortex spinning
wish I could catch it in the air
hold it for a breath or two
catch up on some living
but I can't.
I've been spinning out of control
realizing the infinity
of outer space and suffering.

Do you ever feel disenchanted with trying... like the true depiction of an effigy and the true meaning of suffering were somehow blended into the same murky elixir of aborted, stagnated life... Living is not realized through representation or interpretation, neither sight nor thought. We live through being. I govern myself with so many rules and ( Read more... )

I have that twilight kinda' soul that's tickled by birds at dawn, held in rapt fascination by flocks of fireflies in sublime symmetry before a luminous moon, stirred to smiles by the snowy brushstrokes on naked december aspens, and stilled by acoustic melodies in D minor - that wide-eyed, pubescent soul that fades like the streamlining reflection ( Read more... )