things have been shitty ( Read more... )

it really ( Read more... )

feeling alone.

yet
i
am
the
one
who
isolates
myself.

my
house
is
cold.

and i am sick.

can't really
focus
on
school.

want
to
speed
some
things
up.

want
to
slow
some
things
down.

who needs a friend?

yeah,
me
too.

it is ( Read more... )

at work ( Read more... )

yesterday ( Read more... )

for some reason,
i
remembered
livejournal.
and
remembered
that
i used to
write
all the time.
most
days.
most
nights.

i have needed to write.
but i can't pick up a pen.

it has been almost a year
since
my last post.

i can't even believe that.
reading the last entries
reveals how much has changed.
and
how
much
hasn't.

chalk.

i have not slept in three days
or
is it four.
when you don't sleep you lose track of

time

and

place.

where is some stability?

i have more time than ever
to get nothing accomplished
and
i am succeeding.

fuck this.

i am afraid to pick up the phone.

i am crawling out of my skin.

i met you once.
i created your past.
i created your future.
i will never know you.
i am god.

some days,
movies,
books,
magazines,
coffee shops,
concerts,
sidewalks,
hallways,
houses,
and
radios,
are too much to take.

patience is wearing thin.
where are you?
i need this.

i need
something else
to fill the
cracks
in my
bones
so
desperately.

an entry ( Read more... )