Fic: Desperate Measures (SPN, Castiel/Meg)

Oct 26, 2012 21:42

Title: Desperate Measures
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Vessel non-con, mentions of violence
Summary: That thing that calls itself Meg Masters is in total control, but Kay is still there.
A/N: Written for the spook_me Hallowe'en challenge. Set in SPN season 6.



Her name is Kay.

When she was little, and already dreaming of the bright lights and glittering gowns of Hollywood, she used to resent her mother for saddling her with such a useless little non-name. She spent hours, when she was meant to be doing homework, trying out stage names, imaging how they would look in gossip magazines, as autographs, on her very own star on the walk of fame. When she left home and starting auditioning she’d settled on Krystelle. No last name - just the first. Like Madonna or Cher.

It’s ridiculous what she would give to just be Kay again now.

The creature inside her calls itself Meg Masters. That’s a stage name too; it ditched its real identity - a sinuous Slavic tongue-twister - along with snowy Siberian winters, smoky birch wood fires and its own flesh long ago. It either can't shut Kay out or hasn’t bothered to; sometimes she thinks it gets a kick out of her screams, her whimpers, her pleas for it to stop. That alone should be enough to to keep her quiet, but most of the time she has no one else to talk to.

The sole exception is Jimmy, and he’s not exactly great company. The first time the things inside them used their bodies to kiss and bite and caress and violate each other, she’d called out to him, hoping desperately that they could somehow band together and make it stop. But Jimmy just curled up into himself, a tight little ball of consciousness, even as the fingers that were his buried themselves in the pussy that was hers and two supernatural beings groaned with lust.

She can only talk to Jimmy when they - the angel and the demon - couple, but their appetite for each other is insatiable enough that she has plenty of time to get to know what’s left of him. She learns that he once had dreams too, that he’d prayed for a chance to serve God and do his will on Earth. The perversion of that goal - that his misled faith has led to his lips, so used to singing hymns, being used to tease Kay’s kidnapped nipples - seems to have been the betrayal that finally broke him.

She can’t help it; she wants to break too. Jimmy’s disconnected babbling and the blankness in his eyes would probably be a blessed relief compared to her own state. She’d love to be able to check out when things get too bad too, to start ranting about promises and comets and whatever. But she just can’t. Maybe it’s because the thing inside her isn’t as strong as the one possessing him, or maybe it’s because she hasn’t had to deal with having her faith betrayed on top of it all. Whatever it is, she has to face the fact that if she hasn’t gone mad yet then she’s probably here for the duration.

Which means she’ll have to bear it for as long as the creature decides to stay. All of it. She will have to feel its pain whenever another living nightmare manages to hurt it. She will have to find a way to tolerate the guilt and shame that come when it uses her body or her voice to deal out countless injuries to others. She will have to endure its orgasms.

Or so she thinks.

She started making promises inside her head pretty much as soon as she realized what had happened to her. At first, she swore she’d make things better with her mother if she could only get the chance to do it as herself. Later, she vowed that she’d give up on the whole acting thing and become a nun the way Grandpa had wanted her to be; if there was any God out there capable of helping her then she would gladly find the faith needed to devote her life to him. She still does it; it’s just a way of feeling like she’s still fighting. None of it works and she stopped expecting it to long ago.

Until suddenly it does.

It’s a particularly desperate moment that has no reason to be particularly desperate. She’s felt that angel’s tongue whispering the demon’s name between her legs what feels like a million times before. But the idea that she might very well have millions more such instances to come is so horrific that when the creature shouts with pleasure, Kay screams as loud as she can to drown it out:

”I swear to God, I’ll sell my soul to make this stop!”

And then it does.

She is suddenly alone in her head, in complete control. She wills her eyes to open and they do, effortlessly. Stunned, she lifts her hands to her face and flexes her fingers, weeping with gratitude as muscles and tendons and bones obey her mental commands as if it weren’t anything at all. She leaps out of the bed, desperate to find her clothes and get away before it all starts again. She doesn’t know where she’ll have to go or what she’ll have to do to keep the monster gone, but she’ll find a way.

And then she realizes that she’s not as alone as she thought she was.

“Hello Kay.”

The angel with Jimmy’s face - the one that Jimmy called Castiel and Meg called Clarence - is still there. It sits at the edge of the bed and regards her with a ridiculous infuriating sadness.

She punches it as hard as she can. She hears clicking noises in her fist and it hurts like hell, but it’s her pain.

The angel take her hand in both of his and there’s a weird tingling sensation as the bones repair themselves. She yanks her hand back but it’s too late. She’s already healed.

She says the one thing she can think of. “How do you know my name?”

It sighs like it’s the one that been suffering, and walks towards the window, She wonders about running for the door, but she knows there’s no point now. She’s seen the angel in action; she knows how strong it is. All she can do is whatever it wants.

It turns to her. “Would you like to make a deal?”
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