and once again i can never make up my mind,
so i'm probably going to move back to trenton
in the next two weeks or so and work on the farm again,
because that's the only job i've ever really liked going
to and doing. and i can't help but feel like i'm
only going to feel worse and worse the longer i stay
in philly working shitty jobs.

??????????????
aggggghhhhhhh.

i wrote a longer post, but ya know,
it was mostly complaints and the like,
so i took it down. but it's snowing
and brian and corey are coming over.

weird ( Read more... )

dear everybody;
life's not that serious.
love me.

this is my last post. i decided i'm not going
to go to school and i'm going to get a job
for a little bit. this is what i want to do
and i know it's going to make me happy,
and i'm going to do whatever i want to
because it's my life.

last night i was convinced that i was going to die when i
was curled up in my bed aching all over and lifeless, and
i accepted my life as complete. but i woke up this morning
anyways and quit smoking cigarettes and studied and filled
out some job applications.

i'm actually as good as can be though, and the weather is nice.

ohh, forget it.

while others are exploring job oppurtunities
and what the education system in this country has to
offer, i am exploring the many diverse levels of
consciousness by any means possible.
edit: nevermind. i don't think anybody really understands that.

today i went to bed at 5 in the morning ( Read more... )