Draft Of An Inuyasha Story I might do.

[this_sucks345]

This is just a draft of an Inuyasha fic I might do. This is basically my first IY fiction, if you don't count the 50 sentences I did at onesentence for the Sessh/Rin couple. Yes, this will be a Sessh/Rin story and it will take place when she's older, around 16-17 years of age. Tell me what you all think!

Comments

[wish_wielder]

Ooooh...I like it so far! I love the idea behind it, and if that's how you're planning on starting it: great! It's very hooking, and it makes me want to read more; I really want to know what happened to Rin to make her start to go blind.

My only thing on it: I know Sesshoumaru can be...well, a jerk, but I know he has a soft spot for Rin. The line "This earned a blank stare from the youkai, his face expressionless" is perfect, but the situation is a bit iffy to me. Wouldn't Sesshoumaru notice that something was wrong with Rin? Whether it was because she was walking slower/stumbling more or all the trips to the streams, I would think he'd be able to notice something was amiss. Though, since this was told pretty much from Rin's POV that could be why nothing was mentioned, but meh. Just stuck out as odd to me.

Still love it, though.

[this_sucks345]

Ah, I left it at there. I wanted to write more, but I didn't know how to put it in words. You don't know how much I wanted to put, His eyes flashed with concern as she cried but it's 3 in the morning, and I'm tired.

Thanks for the help, Wish!

[wish_wielder]

Ahh, good ol' writing at 3 AM. It's still good, regardless, and I can't wait to read more of it. =3