I have a minute to update. I must say I am feeling so much better now. I don't even think about cedric anymore. I haven't called him in two weeks. mind you, he has called me two times in the past 5 days or so to talk to me but I didn't answer my phone. I know that had to kill him. which was the point. long story short, I can't believe the way I was ( Read more... )

so I guess I should take a min to update since my feelings are overwhelming me right now and I need to vent ( Read more... )

I don't even know how I have the energy right now to type this out. these past 12 days have been pure hell for me. the first 5 I thought I was going to die. the next few got a little easier. Now I'm just numb. I still feel pain but I don't acknowlege it. if I do, I'll only go crazy again and be overwhelmed ( Read more... )

so I feel so relieved. cedric finally came over and talked to me. everything makes complete sense now. he said he was ignoring my phone calls because I wouldn't let him be. I was calling him every 10 mins or so. well, maybe not that extreme, but a lot. and alot of times he was at work so he couldn't answer. after thinking things through myself, and ( Read more... )

so things have only gotten worse. and I keep praying about it and it just keeps getting worse and worse the more I pray. I really think the devil is persecuting me. I told my mom maybe this isn't about cedric. maybe this is all about me. maybe I needed to wake up and see what I was doing wrong? it's funny but I have realized that I did some bad ( Read more... )

okay this is really ridiculous. I don't understand any of this at all. I attempted to go to cedric's parents house last night and I walked into their house cause they left the door unlocked and I tried to talk to cedric, and he just completely shut me out. He kept closing doors in my face and finally he went outside and got in his van and drove ( Read more... )

men suck. end of story. cedric just packed his shit and left me. he left me waiting outside last night for over an hour with in phone to call anyone. then I found out that he was busy driving a co worker home then coming to pick me up! he had no concern with my well being. then he was out til 2 am with god knows who. I was begging him and crying ( Read more... )

Have you ever been so tired that you feel like you are sick or getting sick, but you really aren't? Your head feels so stuffy and your muscles ache all over. Well. that's about how I feel right now. I hated getting up early this morning to go to that damn meeting at work after working 9 days straight. And with my luck, it was raining like cats and ( Read more... )

YAY I received Aurora's (etherealessence) gift in the mail today from Hawaii, and I just loved it! Thank you so much for your thoughtfulness. I loved every single thing you sent me. It's like you already knew me. everything you got me are all things I liked. Especially the Kimono Rose perfume. I LOVE that scent! it's so pleasant. You will have to ( Read more... )

what can I say. I've been working these past 8 days. Today will make day number nine of work. I am extremely tired. I wish I could just crawl back into bed and stay there but woe is me. I also have to awake at 7:30am tomorrow morning to be at a mandatory meeting for work by 8am on my first day off in 9 days! but, I'm getting paid for it so I can't ( Read more... )