Rant
Sorry that I don't have much good to report on. Not only did my beloved Chicago Bears lose the Most Super of Bowls, but I've become smitten with/fell in love with/whatever a girl.
And I can't help but feel that I'm going to get rejected, much like the other two times I fell. I sincerely doubt that she'll declare eternal animosity toward me or the like, but I just get the feeling that it'll be brushed off and then I don't really have many options for things to do about my feelings after that.
I kinda wish I still had some sort of spirituality kicking in me. Then I could think that perhaps there was something like a soulmate out there waiting for me or that it'll all come in due time or that perhaps it wasn't meant for this lifetime or something.
And now I think that I'm just doomed to death and that I'll never develop the proper skills to attract a woman or whatever and that with every passing second I become less and less able to develop the relationship that I want.
And I wonder if I'll accomplish anything worthwhile anyway.
And I keep on thinking that my complaints are pathetic and that I deserve scorn for daring to voice such pettiness when the universe doesn't care and therefore I should just shut it and bear my burdens without complaint instead of just showing my weakness once more.
I grow weary, very weary.
Sorry to complain. I loathe to do so, but I must.