Transformers Movie Toy Reviews
All right. Time to seriously geek out. This is 40 year-old virgin territory. But I will not be ashamed of my Transformers obsession. They were a staple of my childhood, and while the related media basically amounts to advertisment, Transformers are just... COOL. I could say that I collect the toys now because I appreciate the engineering, or because they are well-crafted display pieces or as an investment in collectibles - and that's all true - but the really real reason is because robots that transform into vehicles are just rad. So yeah, enough of this unrepentant ranting. On with the toy reviews!
THERE ARE A LOT OF PICS BEHIND THE CUTS
The "Legends" line of figures are miniature Transformers, about 2.5" long/tall. They are pretty simple in their engineering, but are quite charming.
Bumblebee
Cute little figure, if a bit bulky in the front end in car-mode. Robot-mode is quite nice - I particularly like the fact that the car doors articulate seperately from the arms, contributing to a surprisingly movie-accurate appearance for such a small/simple toy.
Jazz
Jazz... For the "coolest" Autobot, yer toys are underwhelming at best. Truth be told, I only picked up this figure out of a sense of completist obligation. The fact that there are two undisguised car-fronts on this figure (one for the actual car front, one for the robot-chest) is unforgiveable. I understand that this is a Legend class figure, but still. C'mon. Robot mode looks pretty good at least.
Optimus Prime
Now this is how a Legend class figure should transform. This is a very clever bit of engineering that gets the most out of the inherent limitations in the format. Prime looks great in robot mode and fantastic as a truck.
Ratchet
I've been pleased by the various incarnations of Ratchet's toys in the movie line. This figure offers a very nice vehicle mode and a satisfying robot.
Barricade
Barricade will eat your children.
Megatron
I'm an evil little gremlin! Nyaarggh! Mini-megs is soooo cyuuute.
Real Gear Robots are a sub-line that convert from robots into "hip" technological appliances such as cellphones or mp3 players. They are about 4" long/tall.
Booster X10
The name's LASERBEAK, mother fucker. I only play pirated music.
Longview
Binocular mode is "meh" but robot mode is super. Lots of articulation and poseability, plus great balance.
Power Up VT6
I call this guy "Lightwave" in homage to the original Soundwave. Neat feature: the D-pad and a buttons actually move.
Speed Dial 800
My favorite Real-Gear bot. Phone-mode looks almost exactly like my old Motorola.
Spy Shot 6
I call him "Reflector" in homage to the original camera transformer.
Zoom Out 25X
Other looking a bit like a thalidomide baby in robot mode, he's pretty rockin'
Scouts are the smallest "standard" class, about 4" long/tall. They generally have some clever engineering, but due to their small size, they can sometimes lack the detail of the larger figures. For this reason, I don't typically collect Scouts, but there are a few here and there that catch my fancy.
Arcee
Arcee was the pink car in the original Transformers movie from 1986. She works pretty well as a blue motorcycle too. I dig the heels.
Deluxes are the mid-size class, and form the core of the toy line. Deluxes are about 6" long/tall.
Protoform Optimus Prime
It's easy to write this figure off, since at first glance he doesn't seem terribly impressive. This toy has really grown on me though. There are a lot of little tributes to the various incarnations of Prime throughout the years - the chest-windows from truck prime, the signature faceplate, BeastWars Primal's feet, gun similar to Classics Prime. Moreover, the figure is remarkably poseable in robot-mode, supporting a wide array of dynamic poses.
Too bad his alt-mode is a space-turd.
Protoform Starscream
I'm a huge Starscream whore, so I'm willing to forgive a lot on this relatively marginal figure. Like protoform Optimus Prime, this figure sports a fair number tribute features to prior Starscreams. He's not as poseable as Prime, though, which is unfortunate.
Also, he's a space-turd.
Bumblebee 70's Camaro
...the important thing here is you gotta ask me how I'm gonna get down to the shore.
Uh, how you gonna get down to the shore?
Funny you should ask, I've got a car now.
Oh wow, how'd you get a car?
Oh, my parents drove it up here from the Bahamas.
You're kidding!
I must be, the Bahamas are islands, okay, the important thing now, is that you ask me what kind of car I have.
Uh, what kinda car do ya got?
I've got a BITCHIN' CAMARO!
Bumblebee is probably too nice to run over your neighbors.
Jazz
This version of Jazz is certainly better than the Legends version, but it's still only an average figure. The non-integrated sword/harpoon/gun thingy is irritating, as is the engineering in the arms. He looks pretty good in both modes though, and is reasonably poseable.
Barricade
I love Barricade. I think he's about the most genius idea for a transformer in a long time. Why, you ask? I mean, after all, on the surface there's nothing revolutionary about him; he's just a car that turns into a robot. Well, what he lacks in design innovation he more than makes up for with sheer subversiveness. See, Barricade is a Decepticon - ie a bad, bad robo. And what does he transform into? A police cruiser. Yep, the cop is now the bad guy. He bears a stylized police logo on his side panel that replaces the shield with the Decepticon faction symbol, and instead of reading "to protect and serve," Barricade's inscription proclaims "to punish and enslave."
Bonecrusher
Bonecrusher is totally gangsta.
Brawl
More reminescent of G2 Megatron than the G1 Combaticon that shares his name, Brawl is a total bad-ass either way.
Scorponok
I didn't expect to like Scorponok, and only bought him on a whim - but I've been pleasantly surprised.
Swindle
Swindle is cool in theory. If his car-mode fit together a bit better I'd have a higher opinion of him. I may pick up a duplicate of him to see if the mold I got is just a bit warped or something.
I do like the fact that he can get all Dragonball-Z on your ass.
Wreakage
Wreakage will cut joo. Meng.
FABs are an interesting sub-line of Transformers. They feature simplified transformations and a gimmick, such as shooting missiles. They are roughly the same size as Deluxes, but are a bit chunkier.
Ironhide
The arms leave a bit to be desired, but overall a pretty fun little figure. Looks a little hydrocephalic...
Ratchet
This is one of my very favorite figures in the movie line. He is soooo much fun to transform.
Brawl
FAB Brawl is argueably better than the Deluxe version. He's bigger in both modes, and more fun to transform.
Starscream
Kaaaaaaaaawaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!11!1eleventy-one!1!!
Voyagers are larger sized, typically about 8" long/tall. They feature more advanced engineering than the smaller classes, as well as a high amount of detail.
Ironhide
Complex, articulated and powerful-looking. Great toy. I have a few minor gripes, but overall one of the best figures in the line.
Optimus Prime
This is really a great figure, but gets a bit short-changed because the other versions of Prime are more impressive. The smoke-stack guns are pretty rad though - easily my favorite feature on this toy.
Ratchet
Solid, hulking and detailed. I still think anything that transforms into a Hummer should be a Decepticon by default, but I'll give Ratchet a pass.
Blackout
Very pretty, but somewhat disappointing in the playability department. Great as a display piece.
The mini-scorponok figure is pretty sweet.
He also combines with Deluxe Scorponok, which is interesting, if rather wonky.
Starscream
I had some trepidation about this figure, but as previously mentioned, I'm a Starscream whore, so I knew that I'd be buying it regardless of any reservations I might harbor. Well, turns out my anxiety was largely unwarranted. Starscream is a great toy, and while I still feel the the jet-mode is rather awkward and unrealistic, it's not nearly as bad as I thought it would be.
Schwoooooooo!
Leaders are the largest class of Transformers (in the movie line anyway). They are about 10" long/tall, feature advanced engineering and electronics (lights and sounds).
Optimus Prime
Leader Optimus is a fantastic figure - it strikes an amazing balance between gorgeous aesthetics and great playability. He's an amazing toy.
Megatron
While not nearly as cool as Optimus in terms of vehicle-mode or transformation, his robot mode exudes malevolent evil.
And there you have it.
THERE ARE A LOT OF PICS BEHIND THE CUTS
The "Legends" line of figures are miniature Transformers, about 2.5" long/tall. They are pretty simple in their engineering, but are quite charming.
Bumblebee
Cute little figure, if a bit bulky in the front end in car-mode. Robot-mode is quite nice - I particularly like the fact that the car doors articulate seperately from the arms, contributing to a surprisingly movie-accurate appearance for such a small/simple toy.
Jazz
Jazz... For the "coolest" Autobot, yer toys are underwhelming at best. Truth be told, I only picked up this figure out of a sense of completist obligation. The fact that there are two undisguised car-fronts on this figure (one for the actual car front, one for the robot-chest) is unforgiveable. I understand that this is a Legend class figure, but still. C'mon. Robot mode looks pretty good at least.
Optimus Prime
Now this is how a Legend class figure should transform. This is a very clever bit of engineering that gets the most out of the inherent limitations in the format. Prime looks great in robot mode and fantastic as a truck.
Ratchet
I've been pleased by the various incarnations of Ratchet's toys in the movie line. This figure offers a very nice vehicle mode and a satisfying robot.
Barricade
Barricade will eat your children.
Megatron
I'm an evil little gremlin! Nyaarggh! Mini-megs is soooo cyuuute.
Real Gear Robots are a sub-line that convert from robots into "hip" technological appliances such as cellphones or mp3 players. They are about 4" long/tall.
Booster X10
The name's LASERBEAK, mother fucker. I only play pirated music.
Longview
Binocular mode is "meh" but robot mode is super. Lots of articulation and poseability, plus great balance.
Power Up VT6
I call this guy "Lightwave" in homage to the original Soundwave. Neat feature: the D-pad and a buttons actually move.
Speed Dial 800
My favorite Real-Gear bot. Phone-mode looks almost exactly like my old Motorola.
Spy Shot 6
I call him "Reflector" in homage to the original camera transformer.
Zoom Out 25X
Other looking a bit like a thalidomide baby in robot mode, he's pretty rockin'
Scouts are the smallest "standard" class, about 4" long/tall. They generally have some clever engineering, but due to their small size, they can sometimes lack the detail of the larger figures. For this reason, I don't typically collect Scouts, but there are a few here and there that catch my fancy.
Arcee
Arcee was the pink car in the original Transformers movie from 1986. She works pretty well as a blue motorcycle too. I dig the heels.
Deluxes are the mid-size class, and form the core of the toy line. Deluxes are about 6" long/tall.
Protoform Optimus Prime
It's easy to write this figure off, since at first glance he doesn't seem terribly impressive. This toy has really grown on me though. There are a lot of little tributes to the various incarnations of Prime throughout the years - the chest-windows from truck prime, the signature faceplate, BeastWars Primal's feet, gun similar to Classics Prime. Moreover, the figure is remarkably poseable in robot-mode, supporting a wide array of dynamic poses.
Too bad his alt-mode is a space-turd.
Protoform Starscream
I'm a huge Starscream whore, so I'm willing to forgive a lot on this relatively marginal figure. Like protoform Optimus Prime, this figure sports a fair number tribute features to prior Starscreams. He's not as poseable as Prime, though, which is unfortunate.
Also, he's a space-turd.
Bumblebee 70's Camaro
...the important thing here is you gotta ask me how I'm gonna get down to the shore.
Uh, how you gonna get down to the shore?
Funny you should ask, I've got a car now.
Oh wow, how'd you get a car?
Oh, my parents drove it up here from the Bahamas.
You're kidding!
I must be, the Bahamas are islands, okay, the important thing now, is that you ask me what kind of car I have.
Uh, what kinda car do ya got?
I've got a BITCHIN' CAMARO!
Bumblebee is probably too nice to run over your neighbors.
Jazz
This version of Jazz is certainly better than the Legends version, but it's still only an average figure. The non-integrated sword/harpoon/gun thingy is irritating, as is the engineering in the arms. He looks pretty good in both modes though, and is reasonably poseable.
Barricade
I love Barricade. I think he's about the most genius idea for a transformer in a long time. Why, you ask? I mean, after all, on the surface there's nothing revolutionary about him; he's just a car that turns into a robot. Well, what he lacks in design innovation he more than makes up for with sheer subversiveness. See, Barricade is a Decepticon - ie a bad, bad robo. And what does he transform into? A police cruiser. Yep, the cop is now the bad guy. He bears a stylized police logo on his side panel that replaces the shield with the Decepticon faction symbol, and instead of reading "to protect and serve," Barricade's inscription proclaims "to punish and enslave."
Bonecrusher
Bonecrusher is totally gangsta.
Brawl
More reminescent of G2 Megatron than the G1 Combaticon that shares his name, Brawl is a total bad-ass either way.
Scorponok
I didn't expect to like Scorponok, and only bought him on a whim - but I've been pleasantly surprised.
Swindle
Swindle is cool in theory. If his car-mode fit together a bit better I'd have a higher opinion of him. I may pick up a duplicate of him to see if the mold I got is just a bit warped or something.
I do like the fact that he can get all Dragonball-Z on your ass.
Wreakage
Wreakage will cut joo. Meng.
FABs are an interesting sub-line of Transformers. They feature simplified transformations and a gimmick, such as shooting missiles. They are roughly the same size as Deluxes, but are a bit chunkier.
Ironhide
The arms leave a bit to be desired, but overall a pretty fun little figure. Looks a little hydrocephalic...
Ratchet
This is one of my very favorite figures in the movie line. He is soooo much fun to transform.
Brawl
FAB Brawl is argueably better than the Deluxe version. He's bigger in both modes, and more fun to transform.
Starscream
Kaaaaaaaaawaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!11!1eleventy-one!1!!
Voyagers are larger sized, typically about 8" long/tall. They feature more advanced engineering than the smaller classes, as well as a high amount of detail.
Ironhide
Complex, articulated and powerful-looking. Great toy. I have a few minor gripes, but overall one of the best figures in the line.
Optimus Prime
This is really a great figure, but gets a bit short-changed because the other versions of Prime are more impressive. The smoke-stack guns are pretty rad though - easily my favorite feature on this toy.
Ratchet
Solid, hulking and detailed. I still think anything that transforms into a Hummer should be a Decepticon by default, but I'll give Ratchet a pass.
Blackout
Very pretty, but somewhat disappointing in the playability department. Great as a display piece.
The mini-scorponok figure is pretty sweet.
He also combines with Deluxe Scorponok, which is interesting, if rather wonky.
Starscream
I had some trepidation about this figure, but as previously mentioned, I'm a Starscream whore, so I knew that I'd be buying it regardless of any reservations I might harbor. Well, turns out my anxiety was largely unwarranted. Starscream is a great toy, and while I still feel the the jet-mode is rather awkward and unrealistic, it's not nearly as bad as I thought it would be.
Schwoooooooo!
Leaders are the largest class of Transformers (in the movie line anyway). They are about 10" long/tall, feature advanced engineering and electronics (lights and sounds).
Optimus Prime
Leader Optimus is a fantastic figure - it strikes an amazing balance between gorgeous aesthetics and great playability. He's an amazing toy.
Megatron
While not nearly as cool as Optimus in terms of vehicle-mode or transformation, his robot mode exudes malevolent evil.
And there you have it.