RULES ( Read more... )

i found a poem i wrote like 5 or 6 years ago.. strange how i can still feel like that ( Read more... )

fuck.. cant sleep now.. at all.. i need to lay down and sort out my damn brain.. maybe i should go see a damn shrink.. it might sort my problems out.. i need to do something..stress is making me wig out and be all the more emotional lately.. i dont want to make it seem all about me me me! i just want to be a better person and not the fucking bitch ( Read more... )

im so fuckin frustrated i could scream.. i dont know why i feel this way.. i just do.. im halfway between screaming and crying.. wtf is wrong with me?

well i have most of my stuff moved out.. this is still odd. sleeping alone.. now dan has to move out of the trailer too.. but my cat is being annoying as fuck.. im still too damn lazy to unpack much.. im gonna come home tonight and move some stuff.. get it out of the way.. hopefully michele will bring some of monica's stuff over soon so i can put ( Read more... )

eh.. fuck it all.. i need to try to be happier thru this.. i need to not stress myself out.. i cant deal with it at night when i lay down to sleep.. it doesnt work.. i need to brighten my days.. things will get better.. i just need to be strong.. keep my head up.. everything.

i seriously wish i could take this damn pain away.. for everything i've done.. he's sleeping now.. he needs it.. im so sorry i hurt you.. please forgive me.

things are just so odd.. seems like a dream.. seems like this isnt really happening.. but in a few days i wont live here anymore.. really fucking weird.. makes me sad.. nothing i didnt bring on myself. i shouldnt' be the one shedding tears.. it's my own fault.

might i add one of my cats pissed all over my bed.. my blankets and pillow.. so i cant sleepunti lit's done washing.. fucking shit.

things.. have definately fell apart.. the world dan and i created is definately fallen.. it's gone.. there's not a place to even be on familar ground at all with each other.. it makes me seem like the horrible person because i made a decision not to be with him.. and i just wish he knew how much it hurts me to have to have dealt with this also.. ( Read more... )