sparkling sparkly sparkkity spark
2100w > qmimin;kyumin;qmi;mimin;eunhae
there’re a lot of animals but no plot
feel free to fish(hey) out errors
★
"Hey, Mi."
"Yeah? Mini-mini-minnie-mini-mi-"
"Just. Shut. Up."
"Bawwww~ Kyuhyun doesn’t like undergoing menopause."
"You shut up too, fatty."
"Douchebag."
"What’s a douchebag, Mi?"
"Someone who has gone over the edge of 'asshole' but still not badass enough for 'mofo'."
"I see."
"..."
"So I was saying, wanna be koalas together, Mi?"
"Sounds cool to me."
"Hey, what about me?"
"You can be a wombat."
"Yeah, as far as Australia goes, you’re still a marsupial.”
★
Kyuhyun resides in the magical forest of the country of Kaffkoffzowskiv (named after her notorious inhabitants, the Kaffkoffzowskivs, a hybrid of well dressed bitchy Gucci sales staff and badass Asus laptops (they reduce fierce samurais to shaking masses of emotions)). It is a very nice place to live in. There is sunshine all year round with just enough rainfall to sustain life, the winters are short and the summers, man, the summers.
Summers mean an explosion of colors as flowers burst to life in an extravagant display of splendid beauty which bedazzle the bees and make them drop their little red nectar buckets. Birds who are supposed to be chirpy and cheery, are chirpy and cheery. Bunnies who are supposed to be cute and cuddly, are cute and cuddly. Wombats who are supposed to be obese and mean, are obese and mean. Hippos who are supposed to be...you get the gist.
During summer, Kyuhyun likes nothing better than to lie down on the head of a sunflower and do very serious stuff like sunbathing or belly button poking or nail biting. The little hummingbirds bring him berries and the butterflies provide him with glasses of iced nectar (it pays to know where the fattest bugs live and it is so important to be nice to caterpillars; such a delicate balance).
But actually, there is something that Kyuhyun likes better than sunbathing on top of a sunflower. Every day he pretends to be fussing with his florets but in fact, he is secretly keeping his beady single lidded eyes (plastic surgery is illegal in Kaffkoffzowskiv) on the flower fairies as they go around collecting pollen. Today is, of course, no exception.
“Oooh, look at this cute flower, Zhou Mi,” Sungmin exclaims as he flutters close to a cluster of orange flowers. His wings beat gently against his own back. They shimmer and create rainbows as sunlight reflects off them. Sungmin’s wings are transparent and no doubt as clear as his heart. Kyuhyun once saw him saved a water chevrotain from a crowned eagle. “You’re just a bird. Why you eating monkeys, you stupid crowned stupid,” Sungmin had snarled. He is such a darling. Kyuhyun stalks him by monitoring the pollen scattering pattern of tulips, which Sungmin is so very fond of.
He watches as Zhou Mi makes his pretty way over to Sungmin. Zhou Mi has yellow wings. When he soars across the grassfield at dusk, he leaves behind a streak of hope, fierce and burning. Kyuhyun can see it even if he closes his eyes. And when Zhou Mi pauses over the sunflowers, they lift their heads to him as if they were honoring a miniature sun (Kyuhyun will deny hotly that no, this is not the reason why he lives in sunflowers).
“Let’s bring its pollen back for Ryeowook. He’ll love it,” Zhou Mi chatters excitedly and moves to collect the flower’s pollen. But then Kyuhyun suddenly jumps up from his hiding place (read: the earthworm’s hole) and shrieks at them. Startled, Sungmin and Zhou Mi looks around in alarm before they see Kyuhyun on the ground, looking up at them as they hover above the orange flowers.
Kyuhyun flushes. He has never spoken to them before and he is sure that, shiny and sparkly as they are, they’ll never notice someone like him. “The an-angel’s trumpets ar-are poisonous,” he stammers as he pulls at the sleeves of his perfectly pressed tunic.
Zhou Mi hastily grabs Sungmin and pulls him away from those flowers. “Thank you, Kyuhyun,” he says, “we’ll never forget your kindness.” Then he holds Sungmin’s hand and prepares to fly off in search of beef flavored roses.
“How did you know my name!” Kyuhyun shouts to their retreating backs, surprise overtaking his embarrassment.
“Molly the mockingbird told us,” Sungmin giggles and before long, they are just two tiny specks in the far distance.
✫
Kyuhyun knows this is dangerous, no one except flower fairies is allowed to enter the magical castle. But he knows exactly where Sungmin and Zhou Mi live (the Marsupial Tower) and he just wants to catch a glimpse of them. There will be severe punishments if he is caught. But Kyuhyun is a lovesick Dumbo and the lovesick cannot be expected to count their peaches accurately, let alone stop themselves from breaking into a magical castle.
He makes the daring climb up the castle wall. ‘Finally!’ he thinks as he scampers up to the sole window of the Marsupial Tower. Kyuhyun peeks inside the room and catches sight of no one but Ryeowook, who sees him too. ‘Well, this is a little unfortunate,’ Kyuhyun reflects as Ryeowook (what in the world is he doing here anyway? He’s supposed to be in the Monotreme Tower) takes a deep breath and bellows.
“Trespasser! Guards! CATCH THAT GARDEN GNOME!”
★
One sunny afternoon, in the countryside of Korea, a hen lays three eggs. The first egg is especially rounded, the second a tad too oblong, the third is strangely covered with many, many, many weird brown freckles.
“Guys, guys,” the freckled egg rolls around excitedly in the coop, “what do you want to be when you grow up?”
“I want to be a sunny side up,” the oblong egg says, “because it’s the closest thing to being the sun. I hope to bring sunshine to the world.”
“Very noble, very noble,” the freckled egg nods solemnly in agreement. “I want to be a braised egg because that’ll mean hours in the pot. I love hot springs. What about you?” he gently jostles the egg who is especially rounded.
“I…” the especially rounded egg seems very uncertain of himself. Finally, he takes a deep breath and pulls himself up to his full height of 3.7 centimeters.
“I want to be a chick!” he declares, a little pompously but very firmly.
The oblong and freckled eggs stare at each other for a microsecond before they start laughing. Hairline fissions start appearing and propagating on the shell of the freckled egg.
“Oh, stop it, you! I’m cracking up!”
★
“Stop kissing me, Kyuhyun!” Sungmin snaps.
Kyuhyun flails around with his fins and creates quite a lot of unnecessary bubbles in the fish tank. He appears to be very distressed by Sungmin’s outburst. Biting back his whimpers, he swims closer to Sungmin and attempts to soothe his temper by stroking his back tentatively with a tiny fin. Then he tries to pacify him by burbling a lullaby. But Kyuhyun’s next attempt to kiss Sungmin is still foiled by a very well aimed pinch.
“I can’t help it!” Kyuhyun dry sobs as some of his scales fall out as a result of Sungmin’s vicious pinch. “I’m a kissing fish!”
“Yeah, well, too bad I’m a lobster!”
★
Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi sit on top of the cliff and looks out to the magnificent African plains stretched out in front of them. They’re tired out from the celebrations and have come here to escape from the rhinos who are very persistent party-goers and appear to like techno too much.
“Your tusks are so beautiful,” Zhou Mi whispers to his newly crowned queen. Kyuhyun sighs contently and strokes his majestic mane lovingly.
Hyukjae the wildebeest peers at them from behind a tiny shrub which does nothing to hide him. “They look lovely together,” he gushes to himself.
Because really, who says a lion cannot be together with a warthog.
★
“I can’t!” Sungmin half shrieks and clings on to Zhou Mi.
Zhou Mi shuffles closer to the door of the Twin Otter with Sungmin clutching onto him like a koala. “Don’t be silly, it’s only 10,000 feet from ground,” he says very calmly and logically. “And even if…I heard Heaven is a nice place.” He opens the door and the harsh wind starts slapping them.
Sungmin screams. Unsuccessfully. He opens his mouth but the wind is too fierce. It rushes in and pulls Sungmin’s lips back such that he looks like a teeth baring pug. He tries to make a sound but his cheeks are flapping so much that no one can hear anything but the flapping of his cheeks. With a tremendous effort, he manages to shut his mouth.
That’s when his lips start flapping.
“Brrrrrrrrrr,” Sungmin says without meaning to.
With zero concern for Sungmin’s mortality (at least that’s how he sees it), Zhou Mi inches nearer to the opening and tries to eject him out of the aircraft like a cork from a bottle of wine. It turns out that pushing doesn’t work. Very hard pushing doesn’t work too. So Zhou Mi sinks his teeth into Sungmin’s shoulder.
“No!” Sungmin howls with desperation. A terrible struggle ensues. Zhou Mi loses some of his hair.
“Um, guys,” the instructor - who is supposed to do tandem skydiving with Sungmin and is currently connected to him via a harness - interrupts, “I’m still here, you know, just saying.”
The skydiving instructor loses some of his hair.
Mid-scuffle, something drops to the floor with a shiny ding. Distracted, Sungmin looks over and thus, gets punched very gently in the face. “Watsch zhat,” he says. It’s quite hard to pronounce your ’th’s when you have a fist half embedded in your cheek.
Zhou Mi looks to the floor. “Oh,” he mumbles, “that’s meant for when we touchdown onto the beach.”
The diving instructor picks up the ring and studies it. “At least two carats, I believe,” he verifies and whispers to Sungmin, whose face immediately breaks into an ‘awww~’ expression (see: ಥ⌣ಥ).
“Oh, Zhou-” In one swift motion, Zhou Mi seizes the ring from the instructor and executes an expert kick that sends the two of them tumbling very gracefully (kinda like a black swan) out of the aircraft.
“-Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii~~!”
The instructor’s sigh is louder than both Sungmin’s piercing scream and the roaring wind.
★
“I’m pregnant,” says Donghae.
“I’m pregnant too,” says Hyukjae.
“What? I’m usually the one who gets pregnant in fics.” Donghae is confused.
“It’s fine because we’re both seahorses in this one,” says Hyukjae sensibly.
“Well, I suppose it’s OK then,” says Donghae curiously, as he looks at his curled tail for what seems to be the first time. He clowns around with it by playing ball with the clownfish who has wandered out of the anemone for a breather. The scallop who’s being tossed and whacked around with fins and tails is very displeased.
“Jesus Christ, what is this!” Donghae yelps in shock a moment later.
Hyukjae looks over, half a mysis shrimp dangles out of his mouth (some people are just so adaptable).
“Oh, that’s just your anal fin.”
★
✫ ✫
i have a friend who specializes in sending her friends wombat pictures
there’re a lot of animals but no plot
feel free to fish(hey) out errors
★
"Hey, Mi."
"Yeah? Mini-mini-minnie-mini-mi-"
"Just. Shut. Up."
"Bawwww~ Kyuhyun doesn’t like undergoing menopause."
"You shut up too, fatty."
"Douchebag."
"What’s a douchebag, Mi?"
"Someone who has gone over the edge of 'asshole' but still not badass enough for 'mofo'."
"I see."
"..."
"So I was saying, wanna be koalas together, Mi?"
"Sounds cool to me."
"Hey, what about me?"
"You can be a wombat."
"Yeah, as far as Australia goes, you’re still a marsupial.”
★
Kyuhyun resides in the magical forest of the country of Kaffkoffzowskiv (named after her notorious inhabitants, the Kaffkoffzowskivs, a hybrid of well dressed bitchy Gucci sales staff and badass Asus laptops (they reduce fierce samurais to shaking masses of emotions)). It is a very nice place to live in. There is sunshine all year round with just enough rainfall to sustain life, the winters are short and the summers, man, the summers.
Summers mean an explosion of colors as flowers burst to life in an extravagant display of splendid beauty which bedazzle the bees and make them drop their little red nectar buckets. Birds who are supposed to be chirpy and cheery, are chirpy and cheery. Bunnies who are supposed to be cute and cuddly, are cute and cuddly. Wombats who are supposed to be obese and mean, are obese and mean. Hippos who are supposed to be...you get the gist.
During summer, Kyuhyun likes nothing better than to lie down on the head of a sunflower and do very serious stuff like sunbathing or belly button poking or nail biting. The little hummingbirds bring him berries and the butterflies provide him with glasses of iced nectar (it pays to know where the fattest bugs live and it is so important to be nice to caterpillars; such a delicate balance).
But actually, there is something that Kyuhyun likes better than sunbathing on top of a sunflower. Every day he pretends to be fussing with his florets but in fact, he is secretly keeping his beady single lidded eyes (plastic surgery is illegal in Kaffkoffzowskiv) on the flower fairies as they go around collecting pollen. Today is, of course, no exception.
“Oooh, look at this cute flower, Zhou Mi,” Sungmin exclaims as he flutters close to a cluster of orange flowers. His wings beat gently against his own back. They shimmer and create rainbows as sunlight reflects off them. Sungmin’s wings are transparent and no doubt as clear as his heart. Kyuhyun once saw him saved a water chevrotain from a crowned eagle. “You’re just a bird. Why you eating monkeys, you stupid crowned stupid,” Sungmin had snarled. He is such a darling. Kyuhyun stalks him by monitoring the pollen scattering pattern of tulips, which Sungmin is so very fond of.
He watches as Zhou Mi makes his pretty way over to Sungmin. Zhou Mi has yellow wings. When he soars across the grassfield at dusk, he leaves behind a streak of hope, fierce and burning. Kyuhyun can see it even if he closes his eyes. And when Zhou Mi pauses over the sunflowers, they lift their heads to him as if they were honoring a miniature sun (Kyuhyun will deny hotly that no, this is not the reason why he lives in sunflowers).
“Let’s bring its pollen back for Ryeowook. He’ll love it,” Zhou Mi chatters excitedly and moves to collect the flower’s pollen. But then Kyuhyun suddenly jumps up from his hiding place (read: the earthworm’s hole) and shrieks at them. Startled, Sungmin and Zhou Mi looks around in alarm before they see Kyuhyun on the ground, looking up at them as they hover above the orange flowers.
Kyuhyun flushes. He has never spoken to them before and he is sure that, shiny and sparkly as they are, they’ll never notice someone like him. “The an-angel’s trumpets ar-are poisonous,” he stammers as he pulls at the sleeves of his perfectly pressed tunic.
Zhou Mi hastily grabs Sungmin and pulls him away from those flowers. “Thank you, Kyuhyun,” he says, “we’ll never forget your kindness.” Then he holds Sungmin’s hand and prepares to fly off in search of beef flavored roses.
“How did you know my name!” Kyuhyun shouts to their retreating backs, surprise overtaking his embarrassment.
“Molly the mockingbird told us,” Sungmin giggles and before long, they are just two tiny specks in the far distance.
✫
Kyuhyun knows this is dangerous, no one except flower fairies is allowed to enter the magical castle. But he knows exactly where Sungmin and Zhou Mi live (the Marsupial Tower) and he just wants to catch a glimpse of them. There will be severe punishments if he is caught. But Kyuhyun is a lovesick Dumbo and the lovesick cannot be expected to count their peaches accurately, let alone stop themselves from breaking into a magical castle.
He makes the daring climb up the castle wall. ‘Finally!’ he thinks as he scampers up to the sole window of the Marsupial Tower. Kyuhyun peeks inside the room and catches sight of no one but Ryeowook, who sees him too. ‘Well, this is a little unfortunate,’ Kyuhyun reflects as Ryeowook (what in the world is he doing here anyway? He’s supposed to be in the Monotreme Tower) takes a deep breath and bellows.
“Trespasser! Guards! CATCH THAT GARDEN GNOME!”
★
One sunny afternoon, in the countryside of Korea, a hen lays three eggs. The first egg is especially rounded, the second a tad too oblong, the third is strangely covered with many, many, many weird brown freckles.
“Guys, guys,” the freckled egg rolls around excitedly in the coop, “what do you want to be when you grow up?”
“I want to be a sunny side up,” the oblong egg says, “because it’s the closest thing to being the sun. I hope to bring sunshine to the world.”
“Very noble, very noble,” the freckled egg nods solemnly in agreement. “I want to be a braised egg because that’ll mean hours in the pot. I love hot springs. What about you?” he gently jostles the egg who is especially rounded.
“I…” the especially rounded egg seems very uncertain of himself. Finally, he takes a deep breath and pulls himself up to his full height of 3.7 centimeters.
“I want to be a chick!” he declares, a little pompously but very firmly.
The oblong and freckled eggs stare at each other for a microsecond before they start laughing. Hairline fissions start appearing and propagating on the shell of the freckled egg.
“Oh, stop it, you! I’m cracking up!”
★
“Stop kissing me, Kyuhyun!” Sungmin snaps.
Kyuhyun flails around with his fins and creates quite a lot of unnecessary bubbles in the fish tank. He appears to be very distressed by Sungmin’s outburst. Biting back his whimpers, he swims closer to Sungmin and attempts to soothe his temper by stroking his back tentatively with a tiny fin. Then he tries to pacify him by burbling a lullaby. But Kyuhyun’s next attempt to kiss Sungmin is still foiled by a very well aimed pinch.
“I can’t help it!” Kyuhyun dry sobs as some of his scales fall out as a result of Sungmin’s vicious pinch. “I’m a kissing fish!”
“Yeah, well, too bad I’m a lobster!”
★
Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi sit on top of the cliff and looks out to the magnificent African plains stretched out in front of them. They’re tired out from the celebrations and have come here to escape from the rhinos who are very persistent party-goers and appear to like techno too much.
“Your tusks are so beautiful,” Zhou Mi whispers to his newly crowned queen. Kyuhyun sighs contently and strokes his majestic mane lovingly.
Hyukjae the wildebeest peers at them from behind a tiny shrub which does nothing to hide him. “They look lovely together,” he gushes to himself.
Because really, who says a lion cannot be together with a warthog.
★
“I can’t!” Sungmin half shrieks and clings on to Zhou Mi.
Zhou Mi shuffles closer to the door of the Twin Otter with Sungmin clutching onto him like a koala. “Don’t be silly, it’s only 10,000 feet from ground,” he says very calmly and logically. “And even if…I heard Heaven is a nice place.” He opens the door and the harsh wind starts slapping them.
Sungmin screams. Unsuccessfully. He opens his mouth but the wind is too fierce. It rushes in and pulls Sungmin’s lips back such that he looks like a teeth baring pug. He tries to make a sound but his cheeks are flapping so much that no one can hear anything but the flapping of his cheeks. With a tremendous effort, he manages to shut his mouth.
That’s when his lips start flapping.
“Brrrrrrrrrr,” Sungmin says without meaning to.
With zero concern for Sungmin’s mortality (at least that’s how he sees it), Zhou Mi inches nearer to the opening and tries to eject him out of the aircraft like a cork from a bottle of wine. It turns out that pushing doesn’t work. Very hard pushing doesn’t work too. So Zhou Mi sinks his teeth into Sungmin’s shoulder.
“No!” Sungmin howls with desperation. A terrible struggle ensues. Zhou Mi loses some of his hair.
“Um, guys,” the instructor - who is supposed to do tandem skydiving with Sungmin and is currently connected to him via a harness - interrupts, “I’m still here, you know, just saying.”
The skydiving instructor loses some of his hair.
Mid-scuffle, something drops to the floor with a shiny ding. Distracted, Sungmin looks over and thus, gets punched very gently in the face. “Watsch zhat,” he says. It’s quite hard to pronounce your ’th’s when you have a fist half embedded in your cheek.
Zhou Mi looks to the floor. “Oh,” he mumbles, “that’s meant for when we touchdown onto the beach.”
The diving instructor picks up the ring and studies it. “At least two carats, I believe,” he verifies and whispers to Sungmin, whose face immediately breaks into an ‘awww~’ expression (see: ಥ⌣ಥ).
“Oh, Zhou-” In one swift motion, Zhou Mi seizes the ring from the instructor and executes an expert kick that sends the two of them tumbling very gracefully (kinda like a black swan) out of the aircraft.
“-Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii~~!”
The instructor’s sigh is louder than both Sungmin’s piercing scream and the roaring wind.
★
“I’m pregnant,” says Donghae.
“I’m pregnant too,” says Hyukjae.
“What? I’m usually the one who gets pregnant in fics.” Donghae is confused.
“It’s fine because we’re both seahorses in this one,” says Hyukjae sensibly.
“Well, I suppose it’s OK then,” says Donghae curiously, as he looks at his curled tail for what seems to be the first time. He clowns around with it by playing ball with the clownfish who has wandered out of the anemone for a breather. The scallop who’s being tossed and whacked around with fins and tails is very displeased.
“Jesus Christ, what is this!” Donghae yelps in shock a moment later.
Hyukjae looks over, half a mysis shrimp dangles out of his mouth (some people are just so adaptable).
“Oh, that’s just your anal fin.”
★
✫ ✫
i have a friend who specializes in sending her friends wombat pictures