oh, we're doable in a lot of ways
1,100w > exo + a certain turtle
so like, i was writing hunhan but ran dry after 1k words and had to write rly stupid things. also, lu han = 鹿晗 and 鹿 means deer in chinese. so, that's why. what a deer ;o; his name is deer. cannot. deal. ok i stop fangirling now ._.
exo in various genres
oh yeah, bit rated in one of them
★
Bestiality
Kris has a thing for deers. Molly thinks he’s crazy but then again, she has never met Lu Han in his Bambi glory. She is, after all, just a tiny prairie dog.
Unlike Kris.
Everyday, Kris watches Lu Han gallops through the forest, all graceful arches, lithe curves and woeful doe eyes. One day, he can finally hold his admiration in no more and approaches the deer. “Aey yo wassuu~~uU~uuup,” he greets shyly, extending his horns in what he hopes is a friendly manner.
“I’m Kris the buffalo.”
★
Angst
All of a sudden, Kris’s hand slips into Kai’s jeans and grabs his cock. The latter would have yelped but then his hand starts a frantic pace up and down his length and all protests dissolve into a steady stream of barely restrained grunts. The zipper goes down and his cock is pulled out from his boxers, the front of which is already wet with pre-cum. He lets out a soft hiss at the feel of leather against his hot skin, gasping and clutching helplessly onto broad shoulders when Kris rubs the side of his cock with the rough thumb seam. When the cold metal button of the glove grazes the head of Kai’s cock and draws a thread of clear liquid from the tip, Kai could hardly keep himself from fucking his hand. He wants to get closer but Kris refuses to narrow the distance, only touching him with his hands. Or perhaps he was merely enjoying Kai’s show, all jerking hips and kitty-like noises.
The kitchen table provides some sort of support as Kai leans his lower back onto it and glances down. In a giddy red haze of lust, he watches Kris pump him with both his gloved hands. Lazy strokes over his hard length, occasionally just scraping the tip with a stud and keeping Kai on his edge. Then Kris’s hands speed up without warning and Kai has to squeeze his eyes shut in pained pleasure. The gloves have been removed. Sharp nails are now scrapping over Kai’s sensitive nerve, and, oh god, he’s about to explo-
“Hey guys! We’re back from dance practice~” Xiumin sings from the front door and bounces into the kitchen.
★
OOC
Tao’s teasers.
★
RPS
“OK, take my hand now! Now!” Sehun says urgently to Lu Han who scrambles to hold Sehun’s hand. Immediately, rabid fangirl screams flood the airport.
“Wow, you’re right,” Lu Han marvels a day later when he clicks into his tieba and sees all the Hunhan fan-taken airport pictures that have been plastered onto the internet. “We even have a name for our pairing now.”
“What are we called?” Sehun asks.
“Xunlu,” Lu Han answers, but Sehun tilts his head and narrows his brows in confusion. “Reindeer. That means reindeer in Chinese,” Lu Han elaborates.
“Ah, very keai,” Sehun quips. “Now remember to mention me on all the interviews you go to. Fans love all this long distance pining shit. We have a lot to do to make our ship a Titanic.” Lu Han nods eagerly. Sehun pets the Bambi, who almost purrs.
Sehun might be younger but he sure knows a lot.
★
Food Play
“What’s for dinner?” Kris asks when he returns to the dorm.
Yixing licks his lips at the sight of Kris’s broad shoulders. “How about some Lay’s?” he whispers hoarsely, biting into a potato chip, allowing it to crumble onto his lap. Kris’s eyes follow the crumbs. “Sure,” he swallows.
★
Sci-fi
“Hey, Kris,” Chen calls out to the tall officer who’s standing by the starship.
“Who are you calling Kris, Chen Chen?” Kris wiggles his eyebrows and causes eclipses to happen all over the galaxy. “You know my name is Spock.”
Chen turns to Lu Han. “What’s wrong with him?”
“What’s wrong with him, Uhura?” retaliates Kris.
“I have no idea, Spock,” Lu Han says, taking his place beside Kris. “Quick, Kirk, we gonna board the ship now.”
“I’d be damned,” Chen mutters under his breath. “Coming!”
★
Crossover
“No,” Yixing reaches over Kyuhyun’s shoulders to scribble on his notes. “Your pronunciation is off. It’s ‘hui yi guo qu’, qu not xu,” he says, not knowing that his breath is landing on Kyuhyun’s sensitive throat and making his hyung squirmy. Kyuhyun turns and instead of looking at his notes, starts staring at Yixing’s eyelashes instead.
It’s hard to ignore someone staring at you just five centimeters away. Yixing turns as well and acknowledges Kyuhyun with a smile, “Endless Love is a classic. You chose a great song, Guixian gege.” He shifts and the five centimeters suddenly diminish a little. The atmosphere changes and Yixing stops smiling.
Breaths mingle and static starts burning on their lips.
Kyuhyun leans in.
★
RPS #2
“I ship Kaihun!” Kai chirps, running over to Sehun and taking his hand. Just like the small little needy waddling penguin he is. So cute.
On the other hand, Sehun is as passive as a slice of whole wheat bread. ‘Sorry Kai,’ he thinks, ‘I have another ship to build.’ He pulls out his phone and Kakao-s Lu Han.
Did you mention me in your interviews?
The reply takes 1.3s to arrive.
yeah! lots of times! i even gave you a birthday message on the youku one. go watch it
“What the hell is this panda?” Sehun wrinkles his nose.
What the hell is this panda?
Sehun taps Kai’s forearm absentmindedly while he waits for Lu Han’s reply. The wee penguin is thrilled.
thats bobo! hes cute!
Sehun reconsiders his ship strategy. He thinks of the panda-deer hybrid and then looks at Kai who’s hanging onto his fingers like he’s on a sinking ship and those digits are his float.
Nay.
★
Mpreg
"I'm pregnant," Xiumin says, caressing his tummy fondly.
"In your cheeks?" asks Lu Han, one finger poking Xiumin's pregnant cheek very determinedly.
★
Drama
D.O.’s eyes.
⊙_⊙
★
Mpreg+Drama
"I'm pregnant."
"⊙_⊙"
★
Horror
★
Character Death
"Stop right there! I'm going to kill myself and make you all remember me for the rest of your lives!" Chanyeol laughs bitterly at the newly married couple and lifts the gun to his temple. BaekHyun clutches D.O.'s arm in horror. He gasps and quickly averts his eyes when the gunshot sounds. They stand transfixed, too dumbfound by the sudden turn of events to react.
"Let me," Yixing says, pushing the two of them aside. He lowers his head over Chanyeol's lifeless form and let sparkling tears fall until they collide with the pale skin of his face. Seconds later, Chanyeol stirs and sits up in confusion. Then he sees Yixing and realizes what just happened.
I hate you," Chanyeol spits out, grey matter still sticking to the side of his head.
The unicorn shrugs.
★
tieba > 貼吧
keai > 可愛 > cute
fic idea was yanked off...somewhere, i forgot where ._.??
thank you for your time 囧rz
so like, i was writing hunhan but ran dry after 1k words and had to write rly stupid things. also, lu han = 鹿晗 and 鹿 means deer in chinese. so, that's why. what a deer ;o; his name is deer. cannot. deal. ok i stop fangirling now ._.
exo in various genres
oh yeah, bit rated in one of them
★
Bestiality
Kris has a thing for deers. Molly thinks he’s crazy but then again, she has never met Lu Han in his Bambi glory. She is, after all, just a tiny prairie dog.
Unlike Kris.
Everyday, Kris watches Lu Han gallops through the forest, all graceful arches, lithe curves and woeful doe eyes. One day, he can finally hold his admiration in no more and approaches the deer. “Aey yo wassuu~~uU~uuup,” he greets shyly, extending his horns in what he hopes is a friendly manner.
“I’m Kris the buffalo.”
★
Angst
All of a sudden, Kris’s hand slips into Kai’s jeans and grabs his cock. The latter would have yelped but then his hand starts a frantic pace up and down his length and all protests dissolve into a steady stream of barely restrained grunts. The zipper goes down and his cock is pulled out from his boxers, the front of which is already wet with pre-cum. He lets out a soft hiss at the feel of leather against his hot skin, gasping and clutching helplessly onto broad shoulders when Kris rubs the side of his cock with the rough thumb seam. When the cold metal button of the glove grazes the head of Kai’s cock and draws a thread of clear liquid from the tip, Kai could hardly keep himself from fucking his hand. He wants to get closer but Kris refuses to narrow the distance, only touching him with his hands. Or perhaps he was merely enjoying Kai’s show, all jerking hips and kitty-like noises.
The kitchen table provides some sort of support as Kai leans his lower back onto it and glances down. In a giddy red haze of lust, he watches Kris pump him with both his gloved hands. Lazy strokes over his hard length, occasionally just scraping the tip with a stud and keeping Kai on his edge. Then Kris’s hands speed up without warning and Kai has to squeeze his eyes shut in pained pleasure. The gloves have been removed. Sharp nails are now scrapping over Kai’s sensitive nerve, and, oh god, he’s about to explo-
“Hey guys! We’re back from dance practice~” Xiumin sings from the front door and bounces into the kitchen.
★
OOC
Tao’s teasers.
★
RPS
“OK, take my hand now! Now!” Sehun says urgently to Lu Han who scrambles to hold Sehun’s hand. Immediately, rabid fangirl screams flood the airport.
“Wow, you’re right,” Lu Han marvels a day later when he clicks into his tieba and sees all the Hunhan fan-taken airport pictures that have been plastered onto the internet. “We even have a name for our pairing now.”
“What are we called?” Sehun asks.
“Xunlu,” Lu Han answers, but Sehun tilts his head and narrows his brows in confusion. “Reindeer. That means reindeer in Chinese,” Lu Han elaborates.
“Ah, very keai,” Sehun quips. “Now remember to mention me on all the interviews you go to. Fans love all this long distance pining shit. We have a lot to do to make our ship a Titanic.” Lu Han nods eagerly. Sehun pets the Bambi, who almost purrs.
Sehun might be younger but he sure knows a lot.
★
Food Play
“What’s for dinner?” Kris asks when he returns to the dorm.
Yixing licks his lips at the sight of Kris’s broad shoulders. “How about some Lay’s?” he whispers hoarsely, biting into a potato chip, allowing it to crumble onto his lap. Kris’s eyes follow the crumbs. “Sure,” he swallows.
★
Sci-fi
“Hey, Kris,” Chen calls out to the tall officer who’s standing by the starship.
“Who are you calling Kris, Chen Chen?” Kris wiggles his eyebrows and causes eclipses to happen all over the galaxy. “You know my name is Spock.”
Chen turns to Lu Han. “What’s wrong with him?”
“What’s wrong with him, Uhura?” retaliates Kris.
“I have no idea, Spock,” Lu Han says, taking his place beside Kris. “Quick, Kirk, we gonna board the ship now.”
“I’d be damned,” Chen mutters under his breath. “Coming!”
★
Crossover
“No,” Yixing reaches over Kyuhyun’s shoulders to scribble on his notes. “Your pronunciation is off. It’s ‘hui yi guo qu’, qu not xu,” he says, not knowing that his breath is landing on Kyuhyun’s sensitive throat and making his hyung squirmy. Kyuhyun turns and instead of looking at his notes, starts staring at Yixing’s eyelashes instead.
It’s hard to ignore someone staring at you just five centimeters away. Yixing turns as well and acknowledges Kyuhyun with a smile, “Endless Love is a classic. You chose a great song, Guixian gege.” He shifts and the five centimeters suddenly diminish a little. The atmosphere changes and Yixing stops smiling.
Breaths mingle and static starts burning on their lips.
Kyuhyun leans in.
★
RPS #2
“I ship Kaihun!” Kai chirps, running over to Sehun and taking his hand. Just like the small little needy waddling penguin he is. So cute.
On the other hand, Sehun is as passive as a slice of whole wheat bread. ‘Sorry Kai,’ he thinks, ‘I have another ship to build.’ He pulls out his phone and Kakao-s Lu Han.
Did you mention me in your interviews?
The reply takes 1.3s to arrive.
yeah! lots of times! i even gave you a birthday message on the youku one. go watch it
“What the hell is this panda?” Sehun wrinkles his nose.
What the hell is this panda?
Sehun taps Kai’s forearm absentmindedly while he waits for Lu Han’s reply. The wee penguin is thrilled.
thats bobo! hes cute!
Sehun reconsiders his ship strategy. He thinks of the panda-deer hybrid and then looks at Kai who’s hanging onto his fingers like he’s on a sinking ship and those digits are his float.
Nay.
★
Mpreg
"I'm pregnant," Xiumin says, caressing his tummy fondly.
"In your cheeks?" asks Lu Han, one finger poking Xiumin's pregnant cheek very determinedly.
★
Drama
D.O.’s eyes.
⊙_⊙
★
Mpreg+Drama
"I'm pregnant."
"⊙_⊙"
★
Horror
★
Character Death
"Stop right there! I'm going to kill myself and make you all remember me for the rest of your lives!" Chanyeol laughs bitterly at the newly married couple and lifts the gun to his temple. BaekHyun clutches D.O.'s arm in horror. He gasps and quickly averts his eyes when the gunshot sounds. They stand transfixed, too dumbfound by the sudden turn of events to react.
"Let me," Yixing says, pushing the two of them aside. He lowers his head over Chanyeol's lifeless form and let sparkling tears fall until they collide with the pale skin of his face. Seconds later, Chanyeol stirs and sits up in confusion. Then he sees Yixing and realizes what just happened.
I hate you," Chanyeol spits out, grey matter still sticking to the side of his head.
The unicorn shrugs.
★
tieba > 貼吧
keai > 可愛 > cute
fic idea was yanked off...somewhere, i forgot where ._.??
thank you for your time 囧rz