On Class

[tinyshel]

One of the things that I think I'm finding the hardest about getting a PhD is that I feel like I'm from a completely different class bracket than everyone else. ALL of my friends' parents are either academics, doctors or lawyers--or some combination of these. I'm not kidding--I can only think of ONE of my friends who can join me in saying that we

Comments

[novawildstar]

Do you think it could be a cultural thing? I mean back home it's very different than here. I can't say if going to university makes things more weird or not but I find in lots of ways that I feel out of place in just every day things. Being in work, I have a work ethic that it seems most of the people I work with don't have.

Maybe thats just an age thing but there are people at work older than me who seem to think that I'm nuts for working 9 hour days some days. I think nothing of it and think if I worked the normal 7 and a half hours a day I'm cheating.

[tinyshel]

I thought this may have been the case at first, but it's actually the same for my American friends who are in my program. The few Americans who are out here are also the sons and daughters of highly educated parents. More than a cultural thing, I think it's that I've chosen to do a PhD at a top ten university. I might be wrong, but I bet it'd be the same in the US.

I TOTALLY agree with you about the work ethic though. This has come up several times for me as well. Most places out here like to hire Americans because we have a reputation for working harder.

[novawildstar]

ahhh I can really see your point now. I can also see why you'd feel very out of place. That would be hard and expect that your right, it would probably be the same for the US. Which sadly it shouldn't be.

Work ethic - why is that you think? I mean I find that most of the people I work with want something for nothing, holidays/vaction time is always bitched about, like we should all be allowed to take time off when we want. I tend to keep my mouth shut because half the time they don't know how good they have it. It's no wonder I come home dead half the time. I get into work at about 8am take between a half hour and 45mins for lunch and work until 5 most days. We only have to do 7 and a half hours, plus it's flexi time so if you have extra hours you can only work from 10 until 3 if you want. I couldn't bring myself to come in at that time and hardly ever leave at 3.

[everlovingmoon]

:hugs: I get what you mean. I want to do my four year PhD dissertation whatever-its-called- thingy, while most of my family (except, thankgod, my parents) is like; oh, you're gonna finish this year, so you can get a job! while for me, studying is the ultimate fulfilling of my potential, not getting a job for the rest of my life... ah well

[tinyshel]

Yes, I completely agree with you about the healthcare system in the US being horrible. It's completely privitised and there's virtually no safety net. Now that I'm living in England, I see that their National Healthcare System isn't great, but I still prefer it to when I lived in the US without health insurance. Ah, but NL always sounds so so nice and progressive. *dreamy sigh*

[indielass]

I some of what you're feeling is simply Warwick. I know that I've felt like a fish out of water here on many occasions - I don't have a lot of money and many people around here do (evidenced by cab-taking, cars, clothes etc). I found too that I was 'different' because I'd worked and taken a gap between undergraduate and postgraduate studies - my attitude and drive was completely different from that of my course colleagues.

I think you are right about the-culture-of-education, but I know at least 4 people who have PhDs that don't come from university educated families. As I understand it, it's a product of their ambitions and family support in their endeavours.

I'm not sure I know the *answer* either, but I just wanted to let you know that I totally get what you're trying to say, even if I can't fully articulate it myself!

Hope to see you soon!

[tinyshel]

You're right about the gap between undergrad and postgrad. When I started my MA course out here, I found that at 24 I was the oldest student in all my classes! No one else had taken any time out between their degress, and they all seemed to just fall into the MA because, well, what else? It was striking...

Yes, we'll have to find time to meet up soon! I hope that your readjusting to 'real life' gets a bit easier!

[cliosfolly]

I know what you mean, especially about trying to talk to family about it. My parents are supportive, but only have a slightly better idea of what I'm doing than the rest of the family; my parents have master's degrees, but my mother's is less than two years old and my father obtained his while I was an undergrad. When I passed my orals exam, most people were excited to think that I'd be graduating soon, and then I had to explain that, no, it would be a few more years before I finished.

One of the aggravations about doing a PhD in a NYC-area university and trying to live on one's stipend is the sheer cost of everything--I try to do as much major shopping in the suburbs as I can, because it's all cheaper there. I get odd looks when I happen to mention how excited I am to be going on a trip that involves a visit to Wal Mart.

[tinyshel]

Oh yeah--I can imagine that trying to live in NY on the PhD stipend is very similar to the situation in London: impossible!

[lavendertook]

I hear you. I had never been around so many professor's kids until I was here at UMD for the PhD, and this is just a high ranking state university

[tinyshel]

This was amazing. Thank you! And yeah--what's with the 'professor's kids' situation? It's a bit disturbing