David Karofsky's Big Gay Drama - Chapter 2/2
His bedroom was the scene of their next meeting.
It was a sleepover.
A big gay sleepover.
If the guys ever found out about this his social life would be over. If his parents ever found out they would be disappointed, that would be almost worse than whatever the team would do to him. Thankfully they were both out of town on vacation. Unfortunately when Blaine heard about this he decided that he was going to invite himself over for a sleepover. And when Kurt heard about it he refused to leave Blaine alone all night with Dave so he came along as a ‘chaperone’.
Dave had no say in any of this. He tried threatening Blaine but the other guy laughed at him and patted his shoulder as he invited himself into Dave’s house.
He considered calling the police but he was pretty sure this wasn’t what the police would consider a priority emergency.
This is why Dave was sitting pressed up against his headboard while Blaine went through his DVD collection and Kurt glared at the cake topper on his TV that Dave had forgotten to hide.
“What the hell, Karofsky.”
“I forgot to move it.”
“Well I can see that. What I mean,” Kurt said in a way that suggested Dave was very stupid, “is why is it here? In your room. On your television set.”
Blaine looked up from the DVDs. “I think it’s kind of cute. Like when men used to take ladies gloves as a token of,- ” he paused as both Dave and Kurt glared down at him, “....er, I’ll just shut up now.”
“You’re both crazy, you know that?” Kurt declared. He pointed at Dave. “You’re a kleptomaniac creeper. And you!” He pointed at Blaine who pretended not to notice. “You are ... well, you’re ... you have a boring style. Honestly, black and red, red and black, all the time. I just want you both to know I hate you. Both.”
“You’re such a fucking drama queen. Take the damn thing and shut up.”
“It’s been tainted by your room, I don’t want it now.”
“Found it!” Blaine shouted triumphantly, holding aloft a single DVD case as though he were wielding a sword. “Interview with the Vampire!”
Kurt smirked at Dave as though he had won some sort of unspoken prize. The ‘oh yeah, you’re totally gay’ prize.
“Wipe that smirk off your face, Hummel. It’s a classic.”
“Of course it is. A classic about two men living together, taking in a little girl, building a family. It’s a classic tale.”
“They’re vampires!”
“Of course, who just happen to have pioneered gay adoption. I’m just saying.”
“I hate you so much, Hummel.”
“You guys bicker more than my parents.” Blaine said, jumping in between them, grabbing both by their sleeves and tugging them closer until they were all more or less huddled in the middle of the bed together. “Dave, hit the lights.”
Dave reached over and flicked off the lights, plunging the room into near darkness as the movie started.
He had to admit, the movie was a good choice -- pleasing his love of violence, Kurt’s hopeless romanticism and Blaine’s apparent need to cackle every time Louis did, well, pretty much anything. During the course of the movie the three boys also slowly migrated around on the bed until nearing the end of the movie when Louis had Christian Slater by the neck and Blaine began quoting Twilight, “my god, he has the skin of a monster; run, Christian Slater, you’re his brand of heroin”, they had become comfortably tangled. Blaine was on his stomach, chin propped up on his hands while Dave had both legs slung over his back and Kurt was, very strangely, holding one of Blaine’s upturned legs and had his head resting against it while looking slightly teary eyed over Louis’ angst.
It was very gay.
Dave couldn’t bring himself to move.
He wasn’t sure when they fell asleep but he woke up the next morning with both boys damn near on top of him. Kurt’s face was pressed against his side in a very uncomfortable looking position with his arm around Dave’s waist, Blaine was less subtle in his approach and was snoring into Dave’s groin; his very hard, very interested groin. Good god, the guy’s mouth was practically wrapped around his dick. Dave was paralyzed. For the strangest moment he wondered if sleep blowjobs were an option before the logical part of his mind kicked in and reminded him that Blaine waking up with a dick in his mouth might cause some problems. Problems that would land Dave in the emergency room trying to explain to an overly amused doctor why Little Fury had teeth marks all over him. Oh, also, it was probably morally wrong or something.
Sleep blowjobs were definitely out of the question. Damn. The only other option was to move himself or Blaine.
He was comfortable so moving himself was a no go. Dave sighed and lifted his head slightly, trying to get his fingers under Blaine’s bowling ball of a head to move it to a slightly less awkward position. Unfortunately the fates were not smiling upon him that day as Kurt woke at possibly the worst moment possible. Dave froze, hoping that Kurt would not open his eyes and would fall back asleep.
“Whu-whuderyou doin’?” Kurt mumbled, blinking sleepily. As if a light switch had turned on Kurt’s eyes widened comically and he sat up with a screech. “What the fuck are you doing you perv!” He shrieked, pushing Dave off the bed as hard as he could and, with him, Blaine.
“Omigod!” Dave yelled, flailing his arms wildly and grabbing the nearest thing he could to keep his balance. That thing being Kurt’s shirt. The other boy gave a yelping sound and came down hard with Dave and Blaine on the floor. “It’s not what it looked like. I swear!” Dave yelled as Kurt raised a fist.
“Oh really? Because it looked pretty damn obvious what you were doing.”
“It was an accident; I was trying to move him.”
“I’ll just bet you were!”
“No! I mean I was trying to move him away. I woke up and here was just ... there.”
Kurt eyes him suspiciously but seemed to realize he was telling the truth. “Fine, I believe you. It’s still gross, though.” He gave Dave a warning glare before relaxing slightly and turning his attention to Blaine who was still snoring. “Unbelievable. He told me he was a heavy sleeper but that’s practically comatose.”
“It’s probably better that way.”
“Yeah.”
“Uh huh.”
“Should we try to get him back up on the bed?”
Dave looked at Blaine sprawled in a mess of sheets and limbs, sleeping peacefully, and shook his head. “Leave him. He looks comfortable.”
“How can his neck even twist that far? He must be double jointed.”
“Oh my god, I didn’t even notice. Fucking gross.” Dave said, reaching over and arranging Blaine’s neck so it didn’t look like it was broken. “He’s still breathing, right?”
“Yeah, I can see his chest moving.”
“Good good. So, uh, want breakfast?”
“Skincare first. Where’s your bathroom?”
Dave pointed vaguely toward the door. “Down the hall, last door on the right.”
When Kurt left he just sat there wondering what the hell was happening to his life.
****
Somehow one night seemed to turn into a weekly thing. Actually, it became a weekly thing for Blaine but Kurt didn’t trust Dave alone with Blaine so he usually showed up a few minutes after Blaine with a supply of skin care products and a backpack full of more clothes than he could possibly need for one night. It even happened more than weekly after a point, almost every second day the two came over. He was finally forced to introduce the guys to his parents when they came back from vacation, the introduction took place in the most controlled way possible...or so he thought. His father had already met Kurt and knew he was gay and Dave had taken that into account during their meeting and demanded Kurt dress ‘like a guy’ for the occasion. He didn’t want his parents thinking he was anymore gay than the circumstances warranted. He didn’t think Blaine would be a problem but it turns out the day he decided to introduce them to his parents Blaine decided to dress up for their benefit.
That was probably the most embarrassing and awkward moment of Dave’s life. Yes, even more awkward then the time his mom had walked in on him masturbating to video game fanart.
It turns out Blaine was, to put it delicately, not gifted with a sense of fashion. Now, Dave didn’t consider himself any sort of authority on fashion but even he knew that a plaid shirt, a glaringly orange scarf, and khakis tucked into tall leather boots just didn’t belong together. He looked like a well dressed hobo. Meanwhile Kurt’s idea of dressing ‘like a guy’ was somewhere between lumberjack chic and construction worker catwalk which somehow all combined to look gayer than his usual wear.
Dave was absolutely mortified. His parents were politely bemused. Kurt was uncomfortable. Blaine didn’t seem not notice anything wrong.
He got them out of there as soon as possible and, that night, was forced to explain that he wasn’t, in fact, a member of a gay fetish club.
Needless to say when the guys started spending every second night sleeping over his parents finally clued into the fact that their son might not have been as straight as previously thought. Nobody ever said anything, his parents didn’t bring it up and Dave didn’t want to talk about it; like that moment when you smell a stench in the air and knew exactly who had farted but remained silent so the other person wouldn’t feel awkward.
Strangely enough, Dave was comfortable with this. He wasn’t quite ready to be ‘out’ but the fact that his parents seemed to be, if not ecstatic about it, at least not openly hostile towards him ... it was better than he had hoped.
****
During one such sleepover was the scene of his second kiss.
He had always imagined if he were to ever kiss a boy again it wouldn’t be for years, if ever. Probably never. That scene in the locker room had been something he would never forget and he was pretty sure that crying like a little bitch in the boy’s bathroom for an hour wasn’t the correct response after a first kiss. Especially not when he was the one doing the kissing. It had been, in a word, terrible. Not so much a kiss so much as a mouth to mouth impact and when he had gone in for kiss number two, that desperate moment where for one brief glorious (horrendous) moment he was sure Kurt liked him, only to have Kurt push him away and skittering back as though Dave had just sucker punched him. If he could have willed himself dead he would have. In the moments after that kiss he was sure there was no way he could ever face Kurt again, could never look him in the eye and see the knowledge and accusation, his own lies and hypocrisy thrown back in his face with a single icy glance from that boy.
Everything following that kiss was like a slow motion train wreck and, now months later, he could admit that he had only dug himself a deeper hole the more he had tried to hold onto his tenuous sense of control.
It felt like so long ago. Back then he never thought Kurt would ever like him. He definitely would never have though Kurt would ever be in his room, much less in a pair of silky purple pyjamas and swearing like a sailor while killing zombies on his TV. But he was almost positive, back then, that if he was to ever kiss a boy again it would be Kurt.
That’s probably why is came as a shock when, in the middle of watching Kurt mass murdering the undead and complaining about his bullshit history assignment Blaine suddenly leaned over and kissed him.
Just like that.
It wasn’t even a long kiss, just a peck really; Kurt didn’t even notice and Blaine immediately went red and apologized.
Dave’s brain must have shorted out for a moment because when he came back to his senses his lips were pressed against Blaine’s, kissing him and being kissed. And Blaine wasn’t pulling away. He wasn’t rejecting him. Instead a pair of large, warm hands reached up, placing themselves on his jaw and sending a jolt of heat throughout his body so intense his fingers started tingling and immediately itched to touch. Slowly, tentatively, his hands crept up and found themselves on Blaine’s face, mirroring that first kiss, his thumbs stroked the skin there and he absently noted the roughness, so unlike what he imagined a girls skin might feel like.
Screw girls, he decided and deepened the kiss, opening his mouth to Blaine. When their tongues met he heard the other boy make a sound that went straight to his groin and suddenly his hands were on Blaine’s narrow hips, pulling him roughly forward, manipulating the smaller body until he was firmly on Dave’s lap, their lips never once parting.
He couldn’t say how far he might have gone had Blaine not pulled away, panting heavily, lips red and moist. He was the most beautiful thing Dave had ever seen.
The moment was quickly gone.
Blaine lowered his eyes, mumbling another apology (Dave had no idea why he would apologize for that) and left his lap. The room felt too cold without the warmth of a body against his. Funny how the room had seemed an okay temperature before.
It was only when Blaine moved that Dave realized just why he had stopped and he felt like a complete tool.
Kurt was sitting still, staring furiously at the TV, hands clenched tightly around the controller. He wasn’t playing the game, just staring at the unmoving character on the screen.
Shit.
He wasn’t even angry, Dave could tell, his eyes were too bright and his lips ever so faintly trembled. God damn it, he was crying. Again. Of course he was crying. His crush was sitting not a foot from him with another dude’s tongue down his throat.
He didn’t know what to do. What could he do? He wasn’t what Kurt wanted. He was just the asshole getting in the way of Kurt’s fairytale romance.
Out of the corner of his eye Blaine moved and Dave sat back, knowing this wasn’t his thing to deal with. This was between Blaine and Kurt. The boy came up behind Kurt and wrapped his arms around the thin waist, putting his chin on Kurt’s shoulder. Dave could hear Blaine whispering softly just under the sound of the video game music, he couldn’t make out what was being said but it sounded reassuring. Kurt nodded and made soft noises that sounded like agreement until he turned his head and Blaine met his lips in a soft, sweet kiss. Nothing like the one he had just shared with Dave. In many ways Dave knew this was what Kurt had always wanted, what he deserved, being held by this guy who was kind and sweet, who spoke softly to him and kissed him as if he were made of glass. It hurt and Dave had to look away, feeling slightly ill. He knew there was no place for him there and it hurt so bad knowing he would always be the odd guy out in this.
Without saying anything Dave carefully got off the bed, not even sure if the two of them noticed him leaving, grabbing his keys and his jacket and creeping downstairs, heading for his car.
The weather was slightly chilling and his clothes, a pair of flannel pyjama pants and a ratty old t-shirt, was barely enough for a spring day much less a fall night. He shrugged the jacket on and got into his car. He just needed to get away.
The streets were empty and he drove around them aimlessly, radio set low, giving him something to focus on but the sickening rolling of his stomach and the depressingly alone feeling swamping him. Fuck. Why had he ever gotten involved with those two, he had always known it would end this way. Who the hell did he think he was expecting one of them to choose him over the other ... he hadn’t even been aware until this moment he was hoping for something so stupid but, in the back of his mind, he realized that, yes, he had been hoping. Why else had he let them come over night after night, sleeping in his bed, playing his games, watching his movies, waking up tangled between them in the morning. Kurt with his baby soft skin and annoying habit of making a Kurt burrito out of himself with the sheets. Or Blaine who could sleep like the dead and always managed to find the most awkwardly arousing positions to squirm himself into. God, he hated them so much, from Kurt’s obsessive morning skincare routine to Blaine’s inappropriate movie commentaries and the way they both managed to nonchalantly walk themselves into his life and his bed and his heart and then fucking destroyed what little hope for happiness he might have been harbouring.
His vision blurred with tears and he had to stop the car, parking in what looked like a little strip mall. He didn’t know for how long or where he had driven but he knew he couldn’t go back tonight. He couldn’t face their pitying looks and their gentle let down when they told him smoothly that three’s a crowd and there wasn’t room for him anymore.
With a heavy, shuddering sigh Dave turned off the car and reached in back for the spare blanket he kept in back just for emergencies like this.
As he curled up in the back seat he couldn’t help but be slightly glad for the two boys who were probably happily asleep in his bed right now. They deserved each other. They deserved to be happy. That thought, bitter as it was, was the one thought that lingered in his tired mind as he slipped into unconsciousness.
****
The GAP? The fucking GAP? Of all places that was where his stupid subconscious decided to drive him to?
Dave rubbed his chilled arms briskly. He should have left the heater on because his car was like a damn igloo. Dave wondered if it would be too early to go in and buy himself a cheap hoodie; he was freezing and he was kind of planning on buying a new one anyways.
The decision was made for him when a strangely familiar mop of blond hair became visible, trudging through the cold and unlocking the store. Looks like that Jeremiah dude was getting things set up; it would probably be another half hour or so before the store would be open to the public. Thankfully coffee shops were always opened ridiculously early so Dave locked up his car and trotted into the warmth of the little shop, ordering a plain dark coffee (he didn’t think he could handle a girly drink, and how pathetic was that?) and sitting in the back, propping a newspaper up and trying to look like he wasn’t a creeper. The girl at the till had barely raised an eyebrow at his clothes but he decided the less attention he drew to himself and his flannel PJs the better. Kurt would probably have an aneurism if he saw Dave walking around in - no, not thinking about Kurt.
It was a sad half hour. Nothing he did seemed to keep his mind off of Kurt and Blaine and the more he tried not to think about them the more his brain seemed determined to do nothing but think of them. No other patrons came in while he was there for which he was thankful for and eventually he gave up all pretence of trying to look normal and ended up resting his head in his palms and fighting back the sting in his eyes. He knew he had truly hit rock bottom as far as being pathetic when the barista girl offered to top off his coffee for free, to which he gave a vague nod, only to have her bring back a tall hot chocolate with a mountain of whipped cream on top with the explanation ‘you look like you could use something sweet’.
It was all he could do not to either break down and punch something or to start crying like a little bitch. He did neither, instead thanking the barista and heading out before he embarrassed himself.
The GAP had opened during his little pity party.
He went inside and immediately made a beeline for the men’s section. Unfortunately the pretty boy was waiting for him.
“Are you Blaine’s friend?”
Dave cringed inside. “Yeah.” He turned to face the guy and was instantly pinned by a pair of beautiful but glaring blue eyes. Why were all the gay guys around here hot as hell? Well ... he could think of one who wasn’t. One of these things is not like the other ... story of his life.
“Are you spying on me for him?”
“What? No! Jesus dude, who do you think I am?”
He shrugged. “Sorry, it’s just ... he can get a bit much sometimes. He doesn’t know when enough is enough.”
“Yeah, I heard about the choir.” Jeremiah gave an unamused snort. “Look, Jeremiah, is it; I’m just here to buy a hoodie.”
He gave Dave a once over and sighed. “Looks like you had a rough night.”
“You have no idea.”
“Blaine?”
“Mmm hmm.”
“Of course. Well, come on then, I’ll hook you up.”
“Oh shit!” Dave yelped.
Out of the corner of his eye his worst nightmare was coming true. Somehow Blaine and Kurt had managed to find their way into the GAP and were roaming through the racks. Since Blaine had vowed never to go back to the GAP on pain of death he knew they must have seen his car parked out front and decided tracking him down was more important than keeping a vow. “It’s them! Crap crap crap.”
He did the only thing he could think of and ducked into the nearest rack, hiding among the jackets.
****
And that was how he ended up in the GAP wondering how his life had become this. Hiding from two gay dudes while trying to convince another gay dude to distract them so he wouldn’t have to deal with the big gay drama he’d somehow found himself involved in. How he had managed to find the only three gay guys within a hundred mile radius and managed to not only to get himself involved in a freaky love triangle with two of them but now the other gay dude was telling him the ‘bros before hos’ rule didn’t apply. Homo magnetism was a bitch. He couldn’t even use his powers to get laid, how pathetic was that?
Dave sighed and took a sip of his hot chocolate, waiting for them to find him.
It took longer than he expected before Kurt noticed him.
“Blaine! He’s over here. Damn it, Karofsky ... do you have any idea how worried everyone was? Your parents were getting ready to call the police! We’ve been driving around for hours looking for you. You couldn’t call and let us know you were safe?”
Blaine jogged up to them and, instead of punching Dave like he had sort of expected after Kurt’s frantic speech, dropped to his knees and threw his arms around the bigger boy. “What were you thinking, David? We thought you ran away.”
Dave stiffened slightly and tentatively returned the hug.
Kurt knelt down and glared at Dave over Blaine’s messy head of hair and he suddenly realized both boys were also in their pyjamas. Kurt’s hair was an absolute mess and his skin was looking a little blotchy and when Blaine pulled away Dave noticed his eyes were red and bloodshot. Both boys looked exhausted and more than a little upset.
“I ... I’m sorry.”
Kurt gave a bitter laugh and took Dave’s hand in his own. “You’re sorry? Of course you’re sorry, hamhock, you kept me from my morning moisturizing routine. If you weren’t sorry before I would have made you sorry.” He didn’t know what to say. Was Kurt trying to insult him or ... something else? “You didn’t even wait to hear what we were talking about, stupid.”
“I bet he probably thought we were having sex on his bed.” Blaine said.
Dave tried to form his face into an expression that said something like ‘hells no, I just wanted some fresh air away from you pansy ass homos’. Judging by their faces he failed miserably.
“Idiot!” Kurt shouted. “Stupid idiot, you actually thought that?”
“David, how long have we been doing this? A few months. You should know how this works by now.”
“How does it work?” Dave asked.
“Threesome.” Kurt said, bluntly. Dave’s jaw hit the ground. “We talked it over and it’s the only solution. Now I didn’t get to planning out the details because somebody decided to act like a drama queen and run away but, if you’re willing ...”
“Plus you have the best DVD collection and I’ve already made a groove in the bed. You can’t part a man from his bed groove. It’s inhumane.” Blaine pointed out.
“Yeah! And half my moisturizing products are in your bathroom, and I know you’ve been using my acai berry bodywash, but that’s not the point. It would be a huge pain in the ass to try and move them all.”
“So what we’re trying to say is you’re stuck with us.”
“Whether you like it or not.”
Dave didn’t think he had much of a choice. “Uh ... what about -“
“We’ll figure out the details later.” Kurt said, cutting him off. “What do you say?”
Dave stared between the two boys, one looking worried and pale, the other looking demanding and prissy. He didn’t know if this was love but it felt right. Suddenly Dave knew with a certain clarity he’d never felt before that this was where he belonged. It was super gay and he knew that once the guys found out he’d never hear the end of it, he knew his parents would disapprove and his rep would be shot to hell, he knew he could officially kiss his high school social life goodbye - and for once in his life David Karofsky didn’t give a shit what other people thought. These were his boys.
There was only one thing he could say to them.
“Let’s go home.”
From somewhere to his left an exasperated voice muttered, “You guys are going to get me fired again.”