hanchul - The honest feeling for you (part 1)
Tittle : The honest feeling for you (part 1)
Pairing : hanchul, donghae & kibum
length : double shots
Rating : NC17
genre : romance, angst, crack, fluff
disclaimer : don't own suju ^^ just the plot
Summary : Do you love me heechul? even it just a little bit...do you feel that way about me? because if you are, i will not let you go."
The door was slammed hard. Two people with furious face walked in with anger. One was hurt while the other was expressionless.
“now what?!” asked heechul irritated. His bangs falls on his eyes, but he ignored it.
“chullie…”
“don’t ‘chullie’ me Geng!!”
Hankyung gulped hard. When heechul call him with his Chinese name, it means he is so angry
.
“who the fuck do you think you are?! Testing me like that?!! Ordering your friend to seduce me to know if I’m loyal to you or not!”
Hankyung's guilt gone as his anger rise too. He grab his hair in frustration,
“who am I ?! I’m your boyfriend kim heechul!! Put yourself in my shoes, then you know how I feel!!” shouted hankyung.
His Korean was so fluent when he’s mad like this.
Heechul did not say anything. but the dead glare he sent toward the other man showed that he's not going to surrender just for that irrational reason, no, that was excuse not a reason.
Who the hell he think he is? He has no rights to do that.
The atmosphere grew heavy. No one move. Only the sound of car machine from the road outside the apartment can be heard.
“I’m just so scared that I lose you.” Hankyung reasoned. His voice soft, tired.
“that’s not the answer,” heechul cut in.
“I’M AFRAID YOU KNOW!! YOU ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT SHIWON, SHIWON AND SHIWON!! YOU ALREADY BREAK UP WITH HIM!!” hankyung shouted, arms flailing around.
“I love you with insecurity, heechul ah.”
“then why were you testing me like that?! That have nothing to do with shiwon!!” their eyes meeting with each other.
the pretty man doesn't back down,
“I thought you were bored with me,”
Heechul chuckled evilly,
“after accusing me as not loyal now you think so low of me, how wonderful..”
Hankyung shakes his head furiously,
“no! I’m not―”
“you know what!! FUCK YOU!!!” heechul big eyes stares at hankyung sharply.
“you can't stand of me again?! FINE! Let’s break up! I’m finished here!!” shout heechul as he walk passed hankyung toward the door behind the now pale man.
Hankyung is dead on his track, too shocked of what he just heard. His eyes sting. He feels hot and weak.
‘is this it?’
heechul's hand was holding the door handle ready to dash out, when he heard hankyung call him weakly,
“don’t go…”
Heechul doesn't move
“please... if this time you walked out of this place,”
There a paused in between his words, hangeng's voice was hoarse and heavy.
“if you leave, I will not come to you again, kim heechul.”
there's a sound of steps walking at his way, heechul had this urge to look back, but angry still filled his head and body. So he was just there, listening his soon to be ex-lover talking. He's just behind him, he can feel his heat.
“if you go. Then it will be the end for us. Coz I’m not going after you again…”
‘don’t go. Stay, please stay..’ hankyung's eyes are staring at the slender back. his hand is itchy to stretched out, reaching for the smaller man, he wanted to beg, kneeled if he has to, but he does not want to let heechul see his weakness.
damn, he love the pretty man so much to stay away from him. He falls to deep for heechul. He afraid, that he will does something bad if the older man choose to leave.
The sound of door cracked open was heard. hankyung gripped his finger tightly, holding himself to launched forward and slam the door back. he's waiting, he's wishing that at least the pretty man will look back, seeing his face and re-think his decision once again. but to his own disappointment, the other man didn't even slowed down and when the door slammed close, hankyung's eyes fall on the floor. he walked forward, touching the white door of his apartment then lean his forehead on it.
He wanted to shout, break down at what happen but his controlled mind win over his heart.
A tear fall down on top of his shoes, hankyung only starred at it silently.
*~*~*
Few days later,
Heechul is sitting on the bench in the back yard before his two friends came and claim the empty spot in front of him.
A grinning face and cool face. he's not in the mood to interact with anyone right now, so he ignore them.
“hyung, what’s up??” asked donghae as he slam his butt on the chair. He's sweating from the dance club activity.
“fine,” heechul answer shortly.
Donghae and kibum are at looking each other.
“what happen?? PMS again??” joke donghae before he got smacked from the said man. Kibum smirked at his hyung foolishness.
Was he never learn about,’don’t joke to heechul hyung when he’s on his PMS time?’. Kibum shakes his head slowly.
“I don’t see hankyung hyung this past few days. Where is he?” asked kibum as he looked around him for the Chinese man but found nowhere. usually the handsome man was glued to his hyung like a leech.
Heechul now darted his piercing glare toward his other dongsaeng. But become the ignorant kibum, he keep on asking. Donghae already twitched every time he see heechul’s eyes moving.
“don’t say you two break up again?” kibum's eyes turn slanting as he make an assumption. ready to troll the pretty man.
“so?”
donghae jump from his seat when he heard heechul answer. Kibum and heechul looking at him weirdly.
“but, although that’s the situation, usually he will still stuck to you until you agree to make up again. So why I don’t see him anywhere?”
“coz we’re over.” Heechul said annoyedly without looking at kibum. His eyes are on his assignment.
“do you mean that you’re over is really over??”
“yes, we’re really over.” Heechul stated clearly.
“over like really over ‘over’???” donghae raised his eyebrows as he's spelling what kibum said. that's not a sentence, he rolled his eyes.
“YESS. We. Are. Over. Like. Really. Over. Over.” Donghae’s eyes move toward heechul,
“Over like really over over over ????” donghae stares at his friend again, adimiring his determination in trolling the older guy,
“YAH!!! CAN YOU JUST STOP THAT WORDS GAME?!?!?!” heechul shouted furiously as he stand from his seat.
He take a long exhaled before sitting again, especially when the younger boy only grinning like a chesire cat.
“ups, sorry..”
“you were too much influenced by that shim changmin, weren't you??” asked donghae in amusement.
“why? I love him. Well except from his black hole.” Kibum smile cheekily.
Suddenly he clap his hand, taking heechul and donghae attention again,
“so, is that why you have your PMS these days??”
Heechul “tsk-ed” and closed his assignment book so he can lean his chin on the desk.
“you missed him,” donghae word snapped heechul to stare at his best friends.
“I’m not.”
“come on hyung. You can be honest with us.” Persuade donghae again,
“why are you so talkative today?!” heechul is using his secret tactic to escape from every trouble, a pout.
He pull his body to sit straight.
“you two don’t know anything, just shut up.” He continue,
“I think donghae is right hyung. You missed him. Why don’t you apologize to him? So you can be happy again,” comment kibum softly.
He know his hyung is in love with hankyung. It’s just that his pride as the most wanted man in campus that made him like this. Stubborn. a rockhead.
the oldest among the three scoffed, “what!? ME. Kim heechul?? Asking for forgiveness?? Are you out of your mind, bummie??”
Bingo. Another denial.
“he was the one that assumed about me as he like. He treat me like I’m a bitch. A low bitch. And now you want me to apologize??” said heechul furiously.
Thank god, there’s no people around them donghae think with a cringe. Or else they will make a great scene.
“is that about shiwon hyung again?” ask kibum again. interested fully.
Now he worried about his hyung. Same with donghae.
Heechul nodded. He sighed hard then tell about what happen few days ago to kibum and donghae.
“That stupid bastard. I can’t believe it.”
“but I thought the problem about siwon hyung is over.” Donghae speak softly.
“I thought so. But the meeting with shiwon last week brought it back. Come on, I broke up with shiwon almost 2 years ago. Why it has to be problem now?!” heechul grab his hair in frustration.
He feels awful right now. he feels disappointed, hurt, left and lonely. the anger for being treated like a low bitch is still there, it drive him crazy since he couldn't let it out.
“you love him, do you? I mean hankyung hyung,”
Heechul scowled.
“No. I date him, yes. But It’s just because he’s comfortable to be with,”
“are you sure? Hyung, if you don’t realize it, you never this down when when you broke up with all of your exes. You don’t care before. But look at you now,” donghae paused,
“you look awful. you're scaring people. You are a mess” he continue, kibum nod.
“we can see the difference hyung. You were so depended on him, before, you never do that." kibum put his chin on top his palm that's put on the table.
"At first you act like you don’t care when you broke up with hankyung hyung, but then you worried about him. And when he ask to be back to you, you were so relieved. You must see your face when he asked you to come back to him.” Kibum smile when he remember the time hechul made up with hankyung after their first broke up.
He was so happy, and glowing. like a 5 year old child who get his treat.
Donghae nodded too.
Heechul doesn't show any indication of affected by the observation made by his friends, but he knew better than lie to himself. he's not gonna give up to his thought though. he stubbornly said in his mind. He bit his lower lips then packed his stuff and walked away from the two.
“hyung,” kibum call him, heechul stop, but he doesn’t turn to face his dongsaeng.
“think about it hyung. You are already fall in love with hankyung hyung. and it's not wrong to be the first one to apologize.”
And with that heechul walk away.
*~*~*
Pairing : hanchul, donghae & kibum
length : double shots
Rating : NC17
genre : romance, angst, crack, fluff
disclaimer : don't own suju ^^ just the plot
Summary : Do you love me heechul? even it just a little bit...do you feel that way about me? because if you are, i will not let you go."
The door was slammed hard. Two people with furious face walked in with anger. One was hurt while the other was expressionless.
“now what?!” asked heechul irritated. His bangs falls on his eyes, but he ignored it.
“chullie…”
“don’t ‘chullie’ me Geng!!”
Hankyung gulped hard. When heechul call him with his Chinese name, it means he is so angry
.
“who the fuck do you think you are?! Testing me like that?!! Ordering your friend to seduce me to know if I’m loyal to you or not!”
Hankyung's guilt gone as his anger rise too. He grab his hair in frustration,
“who am I ?! I’m your boyfriend kim heechul!! Put yourself in my shoes, then you know how I feel!!” shouted hankyung.
His Korean was so fluent when he’s mad like this.
Heechul did not say anything. but the dead glare he sent toward the other man showed that he's not going to surrender just for that irrational reason, no, that was excuse not a reason.
Who the hell he think he is? He has no rights to do that.
The atmosphere grew heavy. No one move. Only the sound of car machine from the road outside the apartment can be heard.
“I’m just so scared that I lose you.” Hankyung reasoned. His voice soft, tired.
“that’s not the answer,” heechul cut in.
“I’M AFRAID YOU KNOW!! YOU ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT SHIWON, SHIWON AND SHIWON!! YOU ALREADY BREAK UP WITH HIM!!” hankyung shouted, arms flailing around.
“I love you with insecurity, heechul ah.”
“then why were you testing me like that?! That have nothing to do with shiwon!!” their eyes meeting with each other.
the pretty man doesn't back down,
“I thought you were bored with me,”
Heechul chuckled evilly,
“after accusing me as not loyal now you think so low of me, how wonderful..”
Hankyung shakes his head furiously,
“no! I’m not―”
“you know what!! FUCK YOU!!!” heechul big eyes stares at hankyung sharply.
“you can't stand of me again?! FINE! Let’s break up! I’m finished here!!” shout heechul as he walk passed hankyung toward the door behind the now pale man.
Hankyung is dead on his track, too shocked of what he just heard. His eyes sting. He feels hot and weak.
‘is this it?’
heechul's hand was holding the door handle ready to dash out, when he heard hankyung call him weakly,
“don’t go…”
Heechul doesn't move
“please... if this time you walked out of this place,”
There a paused in between his words, hangeng's voice was hoarse and heavy.
“if you leave, I will not come to you again, kim heechul.”
there's a sound of steps walking at his way, heechul had this urge to look back, but angry still filled his head and body. So he was just there, listening his soon to be ex-lover talking. He's just behind him, he can feel his heat.
“if you go. Then it will be the end for us. Coz I’m not going after you again…”
‘don’t go. Stay, please stay..’ hankyung's eyes are staring at the slender back. his hand is itchy to stretched out, reaching for the smaller man, he wanted to beg, kneeled if he has to, but he does not want to let heechul see his weakness.
damn, he love the pretty man so much to stay away from him. He falls to deep for heechul. He afraid, that he will does something bad if the older man choose to leave.
The sound of door cracked open was heard. hankyung gripped his finger tightly, holding himself to launched forward and slam the door back. he's waiting, he's wishing that at least the pretty man will look back, seeing his face and re-think his decision once again. but to his own disappointment, the other man didn't even slowed down and when the door slammed close, hankyung's eyes fall on the floor. he walked forward, touching the white door of his apartment then lean his forehead on it.
He wanted to shout, break down at what happen but his controlled mind win over his heart.
A tear fall down on top of his shoes, hankyung only starred at it silently.
*~*~*
Few days later,
Heechul is sitting on the bench in the back yard before his two friends came and claim the empty spot in front of him.
A grinning face and cool face. he's not in the mood to interact with anyone right now, so he ignore them.
“hyung, what’s up??” asked donghae as he slam his butt on the chair. He's sweating from the dance club activity.
“fine,” heechul answer shortly.
Donghae and kibum are at looking each other.
“what happen?? PMS again??” joke donghae before he got smacked from the said man. Kibum smirked at his hyung foolishness.
Was he never learn about,’don’t joke to heechul hyung when he’s on his PMS time?’. Kibum shakes his head slowly.
“I don’t see hankyung hyung this past few days. Where is he?” asked kibum as he looked around him for the Chinese man but found nowhere. usually the handsome man was glued to his hyung like a leech.
Heechul now darted his piercing glare toward his other dongsaeng. But become the ignorant kibum, he keep on asking. Donghae already twitched every time he see heechul’s eyes moving.
“don’t say you two break up again?” kibum's eyes turn slanting as he make an assumption. ready to troll the pretty man.
“so?”
donghae jump from his seat when he heard heechul answer. Kibum and heechul looking at him weirdly.
“but, although that’s the situation, usually he will still stuck to you until you agree to make up again. So why I don’t see him anywhere?”
“coz we’re over.” Heechul said annoyedly without looking at kibum. His eyes are on his assignment.
“do you mean that you’re over is really over??”
“yes, we’re really over.” Heechul stated clearly.
“over like really over ‘over’???” donghae raised his eyebrows as he's spelling what kibum said. that's not a sentence, he rolled his eyes.
“YESS. We. Are. Over. Like. Really. Over. Over.” Donghae’s eyes move toward heechul,
“Over like really over over over ????” donghae stares at his friend again, adimiring his determination in trolling the older guy,
“YAH!!! CAN YOU JUST STOP THAT WORDS GAME?!?!?!” heechul shouted furiously as he stand from his seat.
He take a long exhaled before sitting again, especially when the younger boy only grinning like a chesire cat.
“ups, sorry..”
“you were too much influenced by that shim changmin, weren't you??” asked donghae in amusement.
“why? I love him. Well except from his black hole.” Kibum smile cheekily.
Suddenly he clap his hand, taking heechul and donghae attention again,
“so, is that why you have your PMS these days??”
Heechul “tsk-ed” and closed his assignment book so he can lean his chin on the desk.
“you missed him,” donghae word snapped heechul to stare at his best friends.
“I’m not.”
“come on hyung. You can be honest with us.” Persuade donghae again,
“why are you so talkative today?!” heechul is using his secret tactic to escape from every trouble, a pout.
He pull his body to sit straight.
“you two don’t know anything, just shut up.” He continue,
“I think donghae is right hyung. You missed him. Why don’t you apologize to him? So you can be happy again,” comment kibum softly.
He know his hyung is in love with hankyung. It’s just that his pride as the most wanted man in campus that made him like this. Stubborn. a rockhead.
the oldest among the three scoffed, “what!? ME. Kim heechul?? Asking for forgiveness?? Are you out of your mind, bummie??”
Bingo. Another denial.
“he was the one that assumed about me as he like. He treat me like I’m a bitch. A low bitch. And now you want me to apologize??” said heechul furiously.
Thank god, there’s no people around them donghae think with a cringe. Or else they will make a great scene.
“is that about shiwon hyung again?” ask kibum again. interested fully.
Now he worried about his hyung. Same with donghae.
Heechul nodded. He sighed hard then tell about what happen few days ago to kibum and donghae.
“That stupid bastard. I can’t believe it.”
“but I thought the problem about siwon hyung is over.” Donghae speak softly.
“I thought so. But the meeting with shiwon last week brought it back. Come on, I broke up with shiwon almost 2 years ago. Why it has to be problem now?!” heechul grab his hair in frustration.
He feels awful right now. he feels disappointed, hurt, left and lonely. the anger for being treated like a low bitch is still there, it drive him crazy since he couldn't let it out.
“you love him, do you? I mean hankyung hyung,”
Heechul scowled.
“No. I date him, yes. But It’s just because he’s comfortable to be with,”
“are you sure? Hyung, if you don’t realize it, you never this down when when you broke up with all of your exes. You don’t care before. But look at you now,” donghae paused,
“you look awful. you're scaring people. You are a mess” he continue, kibum nod.
“we can see the difference hyung. You were so depended on him, before, you never do that." kibum put his chin on top his palm that's put on the table.
"At first you act like you don’t care when you broke up with hankyung hyung, but then you worried about him. And when he ask to be back to you, you were so relieved. You must see your face when he asked you to come back to him.” Kibum smile when he remember the time hechul made up with hankyung after their first broke up.
He was so happy, and glowing. like a 5 year old child who get his treat.
Donghae nodded too.
Heechul doesn't show any indication of affected by the observation made by his friends, but he knew better than lie to himself. he's not gonna give up to his thought though. he stubbornly said in his mind. He bit his lower lips then packed his stuff and walked away from the two.
“hyung,” kibum call him, heechul stop, but he doesn’t turn to face his dongsaeng.
“think about it hyung. You are already fall in love with hankyung hyung. and it's not wrong to be the first one to apologize.”
And with that heechul walk away.
*~*~*