You sound like me with the paranoia/anxiety/anger. I rarely smoke weed, and when I do its just for a puff, a taste really. Sometimes I'll get a little high. But I generally don't miss it. I think I'm angry/anxious because I can feel things more clearly now. I was so numb to the "me" who didn't smoke weed, that when I completely stopped, I had to get to know myself again. Don't know if it was the weed or me that was/is crazy. Or maybe its both. hehe.
btw are you talking about me=cole? or am I a bad person? ...(paranoia^)
haha I am talking about you cole. A bit sober now, but definately the you cole. yea, it's weird, maybe that's why I am so angry. And easily agitated. It's so weird, but, it's only been the last few days. Maybe it's hormones out of whack, who knows. But, I held a pipe load in my hand today, and wanted to smoke it, and yesterday as well, been really thinking about just having a puff the last week or so. To take the edge off maybe? Thinking about taking a puff tomorrow, day off, Patrick will be at work, just to see. Still debating it, I have a feeling I will wake up tomorrow and think to myself, nawww don't need it Definately you though :)
I have a puff every now and again, just a puff enough to get me just a little buzzed is what I like. I'm don't like to be full out stoned and feel useless and sketchy. haha.Just sit around and watch a movie before bed type of stone every couple of months. If you never drank you'd probably get the same satisfaction from having 1 beer, or 1 drink.
Your hormones probably are a little messed up after the miscarriage. Give it a few more weeks, if you don't feel level, go to your family doctor.
I understand anxiety well. I get it whenever I know I have to be somewhere. I take herbs and vitamins geared towards stress to counteract it. Sometimes it works, sometimes not so well but I keep going to school anyway because I have to if I want to provide a good future for my boy. Check out your local health food store and see what they have there. Couldn't hurt. Better than atavan lol
You are a good person. We all have our own messed up pasts. Some people were simply less honest about theirs. And someday, they'll look back at their judgments and mistakes with remorse.
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btw are you talking about me=cole? or am I a bad person? ...(paranoia^)
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A bit sober now, but definately the you cole.
yea, it's weird, maybe that's why I am so angry. And easily agitated. It's so weird, but, it's only been the last few days. Maybe it's hormones out of whack, who knows. But, I held a pipe load in my hand today, and wanted to smoke it, and yesterday as well, been really thinking about just having a puff the last week or so. To take the edge off maybe?
Thinking about taking a puff tomorrow, day off, Patrick will be at work, just to see. Still debating it, I have a feeling I will wake up tomorrow and think to myself, nawww don't need it
Definately you though :)
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I have a puff every now and again, just a puff enough to get me just a little buzzed is what I like. I'm don't like to be full out stoned and feel useless and sketchy. haha.Just sit around and watch a movie before bed type of stone every couple of months. If you never drank you'd probably get the same satisfaction from having 1 beer, or 1 drink.
Reply
Your hormones probably are a little messed up after the miscarriage. Give it a few more weeks, if you don't feel level, go to your family doctor.
I understand anxiety well. I get it whenever I know I have to be somewhere. I take herbs and vitamins geared towards stress to counteract it. Sometimes it works, sometimes not so well but I keep going to school anyway because I have to if I want to provide a good future for my boy. Check out your local health food store and see what they have there. Couldn't hurt. Better than atavan lol
You are a good person. We all have our own messed up pasts. Some people were simply less honest about theirs. And someday, they'll look back at their judgments and mistakes with remorse.
love you innis
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