numb

[tokutamai]

so it's really happen, i have wished it won't...

first time I was aware of it from someone lj, she said she had strong feeling this time he will leave, truly leave

at that time, I was acknowledge the high possibility

and I thought I had mental preparation

but when things truly happen

it still hurts me so much

what else but disappointment when things your have love so much disappear

they are still they, 6 persons I love, but somehow they are not

because what I loved was the united of six, not six individuals

and akame, I had a down moment and could not believe in them when I was acknowledge the  probability

then I had to read so many fics and writings to cheer me up

so what's now? Keep believe?

Like the last time of my mother

I hoped so much, cancer can be cured

but not so many people are that lucky

and you are not

r.i.p.