Guardian Angel
Title: Guardian Angel
Pairing: Kitayama/Fujigaya
Rating: G
Word count: 653
A/N: An sms-fic for damagea. It's a bit random but I like it. :'3
- - -
Sometimes when Fujigaya looks into the mirror he thinks he sees a flash of something that’s not just his reflection. It’s as if there is someone other standing behind him. He likes to think it’s true - that there is some kind of magic in the world - and on those moments he feels a wonderful rush of warmth and strength inside his heart. There is someone looking after him all the time, and it feels good to know he’s not alone.
- - -
Kitayama is not an angel, to be honest, but he likes to call himself one as he doesn’t know what else he could be. He might be a ghost, or maybe he’s a dream. He could be entirely Fujigaya’s imagination too but it doesn’t matter to him much what he is, it’s enough for Kitayama that he knows what he exists for. That’s why he likes to consider himself as Fujigaya’s guardian angel.
It’s hard to be a solo artist in the idol world, Kitayama knows. Nobody else has seen how hard Fujigaya has worked for years to become the star he has always wanted to be. There have been times when Fujigaya has been insecure, afraid and lost with himself, unable to trust his own strength. There have been times when Fujigaya has felt lonely and vulnerable but even on those times, Kitayama has always been there with him.
On the hardest days it hasn’t only been reflections in the mirror but also soft brushes of fingertips on Fujigaya’s cheek or palm, or a warm arm around his shoulders. Kitayama has visited in Fujigaya’s dreams, telling him not to give up. Kitayama is the one who sent Fujigaya his first fan mail when Fujigaya was sure he could never become anything. It was Kitayama whose shining eyes and encouraging smile Fujigaya saw in the audience during his first concert.
Even though Fujigaya doesn’t’ know for sure what or who it is that always makes him feel better, he loves the feeling of someone’s presence. Kitayama in turn has always loved Fujigaya’s smile. He is like a shadow giving Fujigaya strength while Fujigaya is Kitayama’s light. Fujigaya’s excited heartbeat during his concerts is like a drug to Kitayama, and the man’s voice feels like sparkles in the air, making him shiver uncontrollably whenever Fujigaya sings or laughs.
More than anything Kitayama wishes he could be real in Fujigaya’s world. It’s greedy as he already is a part of Fujigaya’s life but he wants more. His greatest fear is that someday Fujigaya might not need him anymore, and he feels guilty for that as his job is to make Fujigaya strong enough to cope by himself. Essentially, Kitayama’s goal is to make himself useless.
He feels guilty for being thankful for Fujigaya’s humanity; a human being is never happy and strong enough to stand on their own feet alone, without someone by their side. Kitayama is already there but he would love to fill the place of that someone next to Fujigaya for real.
Sometimes his eyes meet Fujigaya’s in the mirror, and even though he knows Fujigaya can only see a faint image of him that hardly lasts for a second, he smiles.
“Thank you,” Fujigaya whispers to the mirror, and Kitayama’s breath catches. Fujigaya still looks at where Kitayama’s eyes were, and the man’s smile is beautiful.
Suddenly, Kitayama feels a heart - a real heart - beating in his chest that has always, until now, been empty and silent. At the same time, for the first time in his life, Kitayama feels something warm and wet falling down his cheeks.
Fujigaya has to turn away as he must start getting prepared for the concert. But even when the almost magical moment is gone the new heart keeps beating steadily in Kitayama’s chest. His very own heart.
Yet he knows his heart will always belong to Fujigaya.
Pairing: Kitayama/Fujigaya
Rating: G
Word count: 653
A/N: An sms-fic for damagea. It's a bit random but I like it. :'3
- - -
Sometimes when Fujigaya looks into the mirror he thinks he sees a flash of something that’s not just his reflection. It’s as if there is someone other standing behind him. He likes to think it’s true - that there is some kind of magic in the world - and on those moments he feels a wonderful rush of warmth and strength inside his heart. There is someone looking after him all the time, and it feels good to know he’s not alone.
- - -
Kitayama is not an angel, to be honest, but he likes to call himself one as he doesn’t know what else he could be. He might be a ghost, or maybe he’s a dream. He could be entirely Fujigaya’s imagination too but it doesn’t matter to him much what he is, it’s enough for Kitayama that he knows what he exists for. That’s why he likes to consider himself as Fujigaya’s guardian angel.
It’s hard to be a solo artist in the idol world, Kitayama knows. Nobody else has seen how hard Fujigaya has worked for years to become the star he has always wanted to be. There have been times when Fujigaya has been insecure, afraid and lost with himself, unable to trust his own strength. There have been times when Fujigaya has felt lonely and vulnerable but even on those times, Kitayama has always been there with him.
On the hardest days it hasn’t only been reflections in the mirror but also soft brushes of fingertips on Fujigaya’s cheek or palm, or a warm arm around his shoulders. Kitayama has visited in Fujigaya’s dreams, telling him not to give up. Kitayama is the one who sent Fujigaya his first fan mail when Fujigaya was sure he could never become anything. It was Kitayama whose shining eyes and encouraging smile Fujigaya saw in the audience during his first concert.
Even though Fujigaya doesn’t’ know for sure what or who it is that always makes him feel better, he loves the feeling of someone’s presence. Kitayama in turn has always loved Fujigaya’s smile. He is like a shadow giving Fujigaya strength while Fujigaya is Kitayama’s light. Fujigaya’s excited heartbeat during his concerts is like a drug to Kitayama, and the man’s voice feels like sparkles in the air, making him shiver uncontrollably whenever Fujigaya sings or laughs.
More than anything Kitayama wishes he could be real in Fujigaya’s world. It’s greedy as he already is a part of Fujigaya’s life but he wants more. His greatest fear is that someday Fujigaya might not need him anymore, and he feels guilty for that as his job is to make Fujigaya strong enough to cope by himself. Essentially, Kitayama’s goal is to make himself useless.
He feels guilty for being thankful for Fujigaya’s humanity; a human being is never happy and strong enough to stand on their own feet alone, without someone by their side. Kitayama is already there but he would love to fill the place of that someone next to Fujigaya for real.
Sometimes his eyes meet Fujigaya’s in the mirror, and even though he knows Fujigaya can only see a faint image of him that hardly lasts for a second, he smiles.
“Thank you,” Fujigaya whispers to the mirror, and Kitayama’s breath catches. Fujigaya still looks at where Kitayama’s eyes were, and the man’s smile is beautiful.
Suddenly, Kitayama feels a heart - a real heart - beating in his chest that has always, until now, been empty and silent. At the same time, for the first time in his life, Kitayama feels something warm and wet falling down his cheeks.
Fujigaya has to turn away as he must start getting prepared for the concert. But even when the almost magical moment is gone the new heart keeps beating steadily in Kitayama’s chest. His very own heart.
Yet he knows his heart will always belong to Fujigaya.