Nog-Soaked Schmoopy Christmas Musing
Luke 10-14 (Yes, this Godless Heathen does know some Scripture. (fine, I learned it from the Charlie Brown Christmas Special. Whatever))
It occurred to me very recently what a truly beautiful holiday Christmas must be for Christians. I sort of parted ways with Christianity in high school with the toxic combination of my snarky adolescent idealistic intellectualism colliding with my grandfather's newfound born again fervor. But every now and then, when I'm not bashing the Christian Right for, ya know, generally sucking generous amounts of ass, I envy religious people their ability to believe in something that they not only can't prove exists, but just doesn't make god damn sense (excuse the blasphemous pun).
And right about now, I really do feel a twinge of jealousy for Christians and what this time of year means to them. Yes, it's true that Jesus was not born in December. Yes, the holiday is a mishmash of traditions and symbols coopted from Pagans. But the truth is that symbolically, Christmas is the celebration of the birth of the Savior. I can sort of imagine, what it must feel like to know, not in your mind but in your heart and soul, that there is a being of unimaginable strength and love, and he had a son and he was his son, and he once walked the earth and he bled to save you and your loved ones and everyone--everyone. I could think, there was a man named Jesus and his heart held the designs for peace on earth and good will towards men, and before he was the man, he was just a baby, a tiny child with an enormous future, an immeasurable weight. He is the Savior, I might think, he is Light and he is Love and he's coming for me. Someone is coming to save me. It's beautiful, in the way that makes you cry.
I can see how that would be worth celebrating.
And then there's the me that still can't really sit through an entire sermon without thinking "Oh COME ON" at least once. If there is a Savior in the Christian sense, I'd be willing to bet he's coming for me--and I should run. What Savior do the rest of us have? I know so many people that are aching in some way to be saved, in some way or another. There's loneliness and struggle and longing and regrets, and people feel lost in the dark with no hand to hold. Looking towards heaven is about as comforting for some of us as throwing pennies in a wishing well. I can only think that when the skies aren't smiling, all you have left is earth. All we have left is each other.
I don't think people are mean or cruel to each other because we take joy in it....ya know, most of the time. I think a lot of people live with a sort of poverty of the soul, with not enough happiness in them to keep themselves going, let alone to spread around to others. People want to be saved from their lives, and from themselves, and they go about, day after day, knowing that no one is coming for them, and there's not much sense in waiting, Hope is an expensive commodity for a poor heart.
The thing about kindness that I've seen, is that it multiplies itself. A smile from a stranger, a "good morning" on the way to work, a door held open, a seat offered, all these tiny ways that a person can use to say, "Hi. I don't know you, but you matter." These tiny gestures are like threads, connecting us, reminding us that we are all in this thing together. We are brothers and sisters in an extended, fairly dysfunctional family--but a family nonetheless.
Jesus, in certain stories, was my kind of guy. Love. Peace. Do unto to others. Be thy brother's keeper, and especially that water to wine thing--yeah, I'd want to be pals with Jesus. I wonder what might happen if people actually tried to be Christ-like...and one step further: what if we treated other people as though they could be our Savior. Would you let the door slam on Jesus? Would you not give up your seat for Jesus? Would you almost run Jesus down at a stop sign if he was crossing the street too slow? No. So why do we do it to each other? Because while we're on this planet, we are each other's best chance at salvation from the curse that is a slowly starving spirit.
It's tricky enough to have the patience and strength to be your brother's keeper, let alone to have the faith required to believe in others. I don't think people really believe in each other all the time. We are waiting for the hurt, because we all know that people lie, cheat, steal, kill, etc. But, I mean, hell--God flooded the planet, and that did little to dampen his popularity. Giving someone a small helping hand is small potatoes, compared to the true sacrifice of trusting others and accepting help.
If we could manage that--if we could actually hold peace and goodwill and joy in our hearts and pay each other kindnesses until we were rich in our souls--if we could keep Christmas all the year as the man says, imagine what that would be like. It would be even better than the magical Savior whose birthday Christmas marks, because it wouldn't be each person feeling that someone was coming back for them, but instead, knowing in their hearts and souls that there was already someone there for them...someone who might not even know their name, but still cared, because they matter.
We are capable of that. We are capable of immense kindness, and deep, deep love, and vast compassion. Our hearts were made for these things--and lots else, besides. And that's beautiful.
It is definitely worth celebrating.
Merry Christmas, all.