(Very) Personal Log
(PADD MUSIC CHOICE LINK)
Oh god is my mind a mess.
After Linnis and I...well, got to know each other very personally, part of me knew it wasn't quite right, but...
::pauses.::
...hell. I have no idea why we were attracted, but we both know it's not a good idea to continue.
Especially after my double expressed his resentment, hatred, anger and rage right into my liver.
The nightmare I had still haunts me.
It was so real...so vivid...so...so...
::pauses, blinking back glazed eyes.::
...I'm sure Voyager's still looking. They have to be.
But I did make plans for that eventuality, didn't I?
(yeah right...I'm winging it basically.)
I just don't...don't want to be alone.
This isn't my time. This isn't my ship.
The only tie I've had with Voyager was with my double and Linnis from another Voyager.
::pauses, thinking about Linnis.::
Maybe that was one of the factors in our attraction.
I never liked being alone.
It just scares the hell out of me. "The Admiral" was never around. I was alone after the Academy incident, I was alone in 'Zealand, and now I'm alone again.
::pauses, sniffs and blinks, nervously remembering the nightmare, swallowing.::
Alone.
I've always hated the feeling. And now it's...
::pauses.::
...it's back.
God, I don't want to be alone.
I get given friends and partners, and the Universe rips them away almost as soon as I get them. I never always have anyone. It's always ripped them away at the worst possible moments too.
Why does the Universe (Multiverse even) do this to me?
Oh god is my mind a mess.
After Linnis and I...well, got to know each other very personally, part of me knew it wasn't quite right, but...
::pauses.::
...hell. I have no idea why we were attracted, but we both know it's not a good idea to continue.
Especially after my double expressed his resentment, hatred, anger and rage right into my liver.
The nightmare I had still haunts me.
It was so real...so vivid...so...so...
::pauses, blinking back glazed eyes.::
...I'm sure Voyager's still looking. They have to be.
But I did make plans for that eventuality, didn't I?
(yeah right...I'm winging it basically.)
I just don't...don't want to be alone.
This isn't my time. This isn't my ship.
The only tie I've had with Voyager was with my double and Linnis from another Voyager.
::pauses, thinking about Linnis.::
Maybe that was one of the factors in our attraction.
I never liked being alone.
It just scares the hell out of me. "The Admiral" was never around. I was alone after the Academy incident, I was alone in 'Zealand, and now I'm alone again.
::pauses, sniffs and blinks, nervously remembering the nightmare, swallowing.::
Alone.
I've always hated the feeling. And now it's...
::pauses.::
...it's back.
God, I don't want to be alone.
I get given friends and partners, and the Universe rips them away almost as soon as I get them. I never always have anyone. It's always ripped them away at the worst possible moments too.
Why does the Universe (Multiverse even) do this to me?