(no subject)
I'm starting to lose track of how many BTW's I've attended. I think this makes six or seven for me. I started with the Dionysus t-shirt. I tend to keep track by the gods....two before me, then Dionysus, Ganesha, Odin, Dagda, Kokopelli... I feel like I"ve missed one.
So this year was Malek Taus/Blue God from the Feri Tradition of Witchcraft. Thought Malek Taus has come up in some of my angel research as an Islamic cognate of Lucifer, but one forgiven by the creator and given the world, I don't know much about him in a Feri context, and I can't say after this week I knew him any better. It's a shame the Feri teachers I know who usually come couldn't make it this year. That seems like a theme with BTW. I"m hoping in some ways that Macha is never chosen as our t-shirt deity, as something mysterious would prevent me from attending, and i'd hate that.
The ride out was more difficult, but fun, than anything else. We (Steve, Adam and I) carvaned down with Matt Venus, Glen Valez and Andrew Plummer, mostly following them. I won major credit with Andrew following him deftly through NY and NJ and we made our way to Cumberland Maryland for the night. It was fun switching cars and sitting in different combos. We had a little bit more of a stressful second day without the boys. I forget that BTW can be like cramming 40 therapy sessions into one week, and while ultimately good, I have a bit of understandable resistance to coming. But once we got there, it was all good.
Building up to this year's BTW, I was dealing with my mom being sick. She was in the hospital for the greater part of the summer, first for twenty days with no diagnosis or treatment, but stable enough to go home, and then she broke her tail bone, and while getting an exam and running her blood work, she went toxic again, and they put her in the hospital for twenty-five days. This time, her old surgeon, suggested a treatment in the form of a stint and pump. I thought she was going to have the surgery before BTW, and I was prepped to cancel. Then she was called to have surgery and I found out the day before. It was a success and we were all grateful. I had been visiting for a few hours every day for the last two weeks, and spent the day in the waiting room. I'm happy to do so, but the lack of regular work and time at home was playing havoc with my mental health Two days go by, and I get a panicked called from my dad that the surgery did not go well, and she was going back in. Come to find out, the doctor meant that the pump was not doing well, and they had to go in to see how it was working, but it was not the initial trauma that I had expected. Steve and I dropped everything and spent the day in the hospital. it went well and the doctor said it was usually done as an out patient, but this time, with her just out of a surgery, it should be done in an operating room. I had a long talk with both my folks over the weekend, and they told me to go to BTW. Between the surgery and BTW, I also found out my car needed $1000 of repairs and we were desperately trying to get our Copper Cauldron book out to the printer for our Oct 1 release party. Looking good! And some people were concerned about some of the strong personalities attending BTW this year, so I did a spell for us all to get along and be sweet, myself included. i think it worked, though I think I should have made a larger list, and I will admit there was a moment or two I was not so sweet, but that person wasn't on my list either. Seems like "and all of the BTW community" is not specific enough. So that was the build up stress.
Once there, things were great. Reconnection to lots of old friends and some new. Very rejuvinating. Highlight were spending time with Joe, Doug and Matthew. We discovered that a few of us have a weakness for fake pot, cackling "I love fake pot!" and plotting the add campaign. I spent time with new friends Sam and Joshua, whom I had met in Alabama on tour, and looked forward to spending more time with. We spent most of Saturday just vegging out together and it was great. We also did a faery shrine trip. Justin was another amazing gold mine of goodness and fun. I knew him from his day job at a book supplier and was really jazzed to have him there. I think I have three very good new friends with them. I also got to spend time with Alaric, and Free Eagle, at the gate, and then later Alaric, Steve, Bennie and I went to the Faery Shrine. It was great to see Bennie be a part of it all again, after having a long time out of Paganism. I hope to see him when I am in New Orleans next. Had a little time with Gwelt too, though we didn't talk as much as I would have liked. This was the first year I really enjoyed the BTW Players. Usually I don't get it, but with Cleopatra, I was right there. And Cleopatra was an alchemist in my Dance of the Alchemist ritual, though that was a different Cleo.
Jeremy was a sweetheart in scheduling and got all of my ritual and teaching work out of the way on my first day, so I could truly unwind. I taught an alchemy workshop in the afternoon, performed the Dance of the Alchemist ritual with Jeffery Altergott and friends, and then helped with the Hecate ritual with Joe, Doug and Matthew, with Rune and Matt. Hecate pointed to me, and I wasn't going to ask a question, but I did ask a question. On our own Temple Feast of Hecate, I thought i had a healing experience with my situation with David Boyle, once and for all, and felt like it was all done, at least on my part. Then a week or so ago, a mutual friend who knew the situation said he had a dream that David talked to him about it all, and was going to be in touch, or that i should get in touch. He wasn't sure. The funny thing is, in real life, this person is not someone David would confide in ever. But when she pointed to me and said, "Someone has a question they don't want to ask, but they should" I did. They all three said it was over, I've already mourned it and it's done. The page is turned, the chapter closed. It's no longer his path and no longer yours to be together. Which is what I thought before the dream. The funny thing was Joe, later in the week, asking me where David was, having no memory of the question or answer.
I got to take Matthew's Traditional Craft class and learned a bit more about the path he's on, as well as Steve's Queer Spirit class. Later in the week, under the canopy of the stage I got to take incantation with Adam. I think both my boys are well prepped for Convocation. Rune's workshop on the hands, eyes, breath and word (I know I just butchered the title) was great. Made me think about things in different ways, though it was interesting to watch some folks reactions. I sat out Ereshkigal ritual and hung out for most of the night. Had a very inspiring conversation with the Otherworld boys about our paths and they gave me some good ideas about what I might be doing next in terms of my craft, or at least which spirits to ask and why.
Friday Komos was great for me, until a point when we blinked and five men were down due to a little bit of excess (and perhaps with one, too much spirit work in unfamiliar territory). And strangely everybody needed me. Thankfully one can sober up really quickly in these situations as I spent much of the evening and morning help folks where I could. I really enjoyed my time before it, and it wasn't bad to be called away for that. I wish I spent more time with some new friends, both before, during and after Komos. Sorry Alaric, Rich, Matt, Glenn, and Jim. Perhaps more time to hang out next year. Ah well, next year and keeping in touch this year. Can't be mad at anyone, as I remember one Komos where I was that guy too....! So much so, they made t-shirts about it.
The guest speaker Trebor Healey was a lot of fun. Great, fun, interesting poet! Very pagan without being part of any tradition, and very Marian. I kept thinking I wish my friend Chris Giroux was hearing him. His poems were both smart and dead sexy, and I love the way he delivered them. "Dude, I don't read." I didn't make his workshops, though they were both writing workshops and I'm off the clock at BTW, but his key note was great. He is a lot of fun. We met earlier in our careers at a convention in New Orleans. Sadly we emailed more before BTW than we hung out, but i didn't want to monopolize him. The rites are always fun for me. They started kind of somber, and we were being watched by Dame Fate in her triple masks, but once we got into it, I remembered why I love it, though I think I'd like to see some different faces playing the parts soon, just to pass on the tradition to other community members. Our final night was drinking absinthe around the fire. Some of the best absinthe I've had. Thank you Mathew!
My alchemical tincture of the week was Lady's Mantle. After a fourteen week ritual of making it, I started taking it the Friday before the festival. Thus far, the results have been interesting. I've had what I would consider transpersonal/tiphereth/heart chakra experiences, even extended periods of consciousness. This was different but similar. I started those experiences in my exploration of ascension and lightwork, and while they were not the naieve, everything's light and there is no bad, the attitude was the bad didn't matter. It would be redeemed. But it was a bit ungrounded at times. Since taking the tincture, it's like I'm fully in the heart and the root, and points inbetween. I am in love with the world, and with lots of people, but a little more discerning. It seems less ecstatic, but more "real" if that makes sense. I felt it a lot at BTW, particularly at Komos with the ups and downs, but it was even keeled. I felt like I was in a god place, a typpo, I meant good, but god place too, but also very grounded in the world of humanity in the personality. It's been interesting. I have to say since coming home it's not been as consistent, the critical mass, was reached at the festival, but i still feel it a bit.
The only thing bitter sweet was the many folks who I didn't see this year who are regulars. Too many to name, but your presence was sorely missed and I hope to see you next year when the mist rise again and our homo-Avalon is accessible once more.
So this year was Malek Taus/Blue God from the Feri Tradition of Witchcraft. Thought Malek Taus has come up in some of my angel research as an Islamic cognate of Lucifer, but one forgiven by the creator and given the world, I don't know much about him in a Feri context, and I can't say after this week I knew him any better. It's a shame the Feri teachers I know who usually come couldn't make it this year. That seems like a theme with BTW. I"m hoping in some ways that Macha is never chosen as our t-shirt deity, as something mysterious would prevent me from attending, and i'd hate that.
The ride out was more difficult, but fun, than anything else. We (Steve, Adam and I) carvaned down with Matt Venus, Glen Valez and Andrew Plummer, mostly following them. I won major credit with Andrew following him deftly through NY and NJ and we made our way to Cumberland Maryland for the night. It was fun switching cars and sitting in different combos. We had a little bit more of a stressful second day without the boys. I forget that BTW can be like cramming 40 therapy sessions into one week, and while ultimately good, I have a bit of understandable resistance to coming. But once we got there, it was all good.
Building up to this year's BTW, I was dealing with my mom being sick. She was in the hospital for the greater part of the summer, first for twenty days with no diagnosis or treatment, but stable enough to go home, and then she broke her tail bone, and while getting an exam and running her blood work, she went toxic again, and they put her in the hospital for twenty-five days. This time, her old surgeon, suggested a treatment in the form of a stint and pump. I thought she was going to have the surgery before BTW, and I was prepped to cancel. Then she was called to have surgery and I found out the day before. It was a success and we were all grateful. I had been visiting for a few hours every day for the last two weeks, and spent the day in the waiting room. I'm happy to do so, but the lack of regular work and time at home was playing havoc with my mental health Two days go by, and I get a panicked called from my dad that the surgery did not go well, and she was going back in. Come to find out, the doctor meant that the pump was not doing well, and they had to go in to see how it was working, but it was not the initial trauma that I had expected. Steve and I dropped everything and spent the day in the hospital. it went well and the doctor said it was usually done as an out patient, but this time, with her just out of a surgery, it should be done in an operating room. I had a long talk with both my folks over the weekend, and they told me to go to BTW. Between the surgery and BTW, I also found out my car needed $1000 of repairs and we were desperately trying to get our Copper Cauldron book out to the printer for our Oct 1 release party. Looking good! And some people were concerned about some of the strong personalities attending BTW this year, so I did a spell for us all to get along and be sweet, myself included. i think it worked, though I think I should have made a larger list, and I will admit there was a moment or two I was not so sweet, but that person wasn't on my list either. Seems like "and all of the BTW community" is not specific enough. So that was the build up stress.
Once there, things were great. Reconnection to lots of old friends and some new. Very rejuvinating. Highlight were spending time with Joe, Doug and Matthew. We discovered that a few of us have a weakness for fake pot, cackling "I love fake pot!" and plotting the add campaign. I spent time with new friends Sam and Joshua, whom I had met in Alabama on tour, and looked forward to spending more time with. We spent most of Saturday just vegging out together and it was great. We also did a faery shrine trip. Justin was another amazing gold mine of goodness and fun. I knew him from his day job at a book supplier and was really jazzed to have him there. I think I have three very good new friends with them. I also got to spend time with Alaric, and Free Eagle, at the gate, and then later Alaric, Steve, Bennie and I went to the Faery Shrine. It was great to see Bennie be a part of it all again, after having a long time out of Paganism. I hope to see him when I am in New Orleans next. Had a little time with Gwelt too, though we didn't talk as much as I would have liked. This was the first year I really enjoyed the BTW Players. Usually I don't get it, but with Cleopatra, I was right there. And Cleopatra was an alchemist in my Dance of the Alchemist ritual, though that was a different Cleo.
Jeremy was a sweetheart in scheduling and got all of my ritual and teaching work out of the way on my first day, so I could truly unwind. I taught an alchemy workshop in the afternoon, performed the Dance of the Alchemist ritual with Jeffery Altergott and friends, and then helped with the Hecate ritual with Joe, Doug and Matthew, with Rune and Matt. Hecate pointed to me, and I wasn't going to ask a question, but I did ask a question. On our own Temple Feast of Hecate, I thought i had a healing experience with my situation with David Boyle, once and for all, and felt like it was all done, at least on my part. Then a week or so ago, a mutual friend who knew the situation said he had a dream that David talked to him about it all, and was going to be in touch, or that i should get in touch. He wasn't sure. The funny thing is, in real life, this person is not someone David would confide in ever. But when she pointed to me and said, "Someone has a question they don't want to ask, but they should" I did. They all three said it was over, I've already mourned it and it's done. The page is turned, the chapter closed. It's no longer his path and no longer yours to be together. Which is what I thought before the dream. The funny thing was Joe, later in the week, asking me where David was, having no memory of the question or answer.
I got to take Matthew's Traditional Craft class and learned a bit more about the path he's on, as well as Steve's Queer Spirit class. Later in the week, under the canopy of the stage I got to take incantation with Adam. I think both my boys are well prepped for Convocation. Rune's workshop on the hands, eyes, breath and word (I know I just butchered the title) was great. Made me think about things in different ways, though it was interesting to watch some folks reactions. I sat out Ereshkigal ritual and hung out for most of the night. Had a very inspiring conversation with the Otherworld boys about our paths and they gave me some good ideas about what I might be doing next in terms of my craft, or at least which spirits to ask and why.
Friday Komos was great for me, until a point when we blinked and five men were down due to a little bit of excess (and perhaps with one, too much spirit work in unfamiliar territory). And strangely everybody needed me. Thankfully one can sober up really quickly in these situations as I spent much of the evening and morning help folks where I could. I really enjoyed my time before it, and it wasn't bad to be called away for that. I wish I spent more time with some new friends, both before, during and after Komos. Sorry Alaric, Rich, Matt, Glenn, and Jim. Perhaps more time to hang out next year. Ah well, next year and keeping in touch this year. Can't be mad at anyone, as I remember one Komos where I was that guy too....! So much so, they made t-shirts about it.
The guest speaker Trebor Healey was a lot of fun. Great, fun, interesting poet! Very pagan without being part of any tradition, and very Marian. I kept thinking I wish my friend Chris Giroux was hearing him. His poems were both smart and dead sexy, and I love the way he delivered them. "Dude, I don't read." I didn't make his workshops, though they were both writing workshops and I'm off the clock at BTW, but his key note was great. He is a lot of fun. We met earlier in our careers at a convention in New Orleans. Sadly we emailed more before BTW than we hung out, but i didn't want to monopolize him. The rites are always fun for me. They started kind of somber, and we were being watched by Dame Fate in her triple masks, but once we got into it, I remembered why I love it, though I think I'd like to see some different faces playing the parts soon, just to pass on the tradition to other community members. Our final night was drinking absinthe around the fire. Some of the best absinthe I've had. Thank you Mathew!
My alchemical tincture of the week was Lady's Mantle. After a fourteen week ritual of making it, I started taking it the Friday before the festival. Thus far, the results have been interesting. I've had what I would consider transpersonal/tiphereth/heart chakra experiences, even extended periods of consciousness. This was different but similar. I started those experiences in my exploration of ascension and lightwork, and while they were not the naieve, everything's light and there is no bad, the attitude was the bad didn't matter. It would be redeemed. But it was a bit ungrounded at times. Since taking the tincture, it's like I'm fully in the heart and the root, and points inbetween. I am in love with the world, and with lots of people, but a little more discerning. It seems less ecstatic, but more "real" if that makes sense. I felt it a lot at BTW, particularly at Komos with the ups and downs, but it was even keeled. I felt like I was in a god place, a typpo, I meant good, but god place too, but also very grounded in the world of humanity in the personality. It's been interesting. I have to say since coming home it's not been as consistent, the critical mass, was reached at the festival, but i still feel it a bit.
The only thing bitter sweet was the many folks who I didn't see this year who are regulars. Too many to name, but your presence was sorely missed and I hope to see you next year when the mist rise again and our homo-Avalon is accessible once more.