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Oct 17, 2019 08:54

I wanted to come write yesterday but I took a shift at work instead ( Read more... )

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love_isasmoke October 17 2019, 17:16:30 UTC
almost feels like after any okay day or falling back into it...the fallout gets worse each time.

This
This is what I feel I’m doing and it makes me think of how I lost sam and it makes me think this is how I’m going to lose everyone I care about.
That’s why I’m scared you’re going to hate me and we’re going to hate each other.
I have to stop myself now from saying mean cold shit and I don’t always stop myself and then I just immediately regret it and feel bad. I don’t want to hurt you or say hurtful things.
I didn’t know you took a shift yesterday
Just reading that made me so depressed
But that totally makes sense
Why take it off anymore, you were taking it off to be with me

But of course the fallout gets worse
I feel more stupid for starting it or falling back into it
Every time
Have I not been saying I feel like I’m ruining everything for weeks?

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torysawesome October 17 2019, 23:55:12 UTC
I don't think I could ever hate you
Yeah I wasn't going to but I was a little bit of a mess the last wednesday I stayed home so I thought it might be a good idea

You have been saying that and I meant to respond when you posted it
I don't think it's fair you think you're ruining it
I don't think that

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