Last night, on the eve of Father's Day, I had a very vivid dream that my father died.

I grieved throughout the entire course of the dream.

I really woke up with tears in my eyes this morning.

He doesn't think so, but I finally love him.

Progression = Destruction

In order to construst, you must deconstruct something that previously stood.

In order to become independent, self-respectful, and confident, you must destroy hope, comfort, and caring.

I am cold and mean, but at least I don't need anyone.

You are truely a God-send.

Having you in my life is a gift from Heaven.

In 24 hours and 36 minutes I will be twenty years old ( Read more... )

I feel great. Purely great.

It's been a while since this.

And it's been in the me whole time.

P.S. - I know it's wierd and frustrating and old. But, sometimes, we all just give up and get mad because we don't know what to do.

And if I'm lonely, it doesn't matter;
I think there's worse than being lonely.

You ruin things by simply existing.

Fuck you, your presence, and everything about you.

Two things I need to learn how to do:

1) Breathe.

2) Have lover expectations of others.

I'm too idealistic.

I am not as good as you believe me to be.

I am flawed. I am dirty.

I still hope you look past all of those things.

"She had to die..."

Why does love make murderers of men?