iGossip for GG episode 2X15 Gone with the Will
“On the Upper East Side, Death's sad chapter comes with a silver lining... or a gold one”
Awww Chuck's face as he's putting on (what I think is his father's) red tie is so “little boy lost.” It just breaks my heart! (note to self, grab screen cap of this scene because Ed looks adorable!)
Chuck has asked Blair to come to the reading of the will for support and she walks up on Jack(ass) standing outside looking awfully smug. Jack(ass) resumes his creepy come-ons and Blair, sans headband, knocks him down “Whatever may have transpired between us, what's important is what it means to me, which is nothing.” Don't you just love B?!
Que my fandom boyfriend Chuck's entrance as uncle Jack(ass) gives him a pep talk. I couldn't help but notice how Blair was looking at Chuck in this scene, like she wanted to touch him so badly, offer him some comfort. She even grazes her gloved hand down his coat sleeve, absently. ::SIGH:: And it was nice of the writers to remember that Nate is Chuck's best friend and actually have him show up to offer his support as well. (Hi Nate!)
JENNY! in an amazing gray and black striped scarf cardigan with Dan talking about Rufus “hooking up” with Lily on their trip to Boston. ::awkward:: It sounds like Taylor has a cold, but that's probably just me paying WAY too much attention to her. Dan ignoring Serena's call TSK TSK Dan!
Back to all things Chuck. Blair and Nate are sitting outside of the will reading and Blair says, “I wouldn't have come to this party if I knew I wasn't V.I.P.” LOL! Blair's gray tights are really cute, but Blair shh-ing Nate, as she presses her ear to the door to attempt to eavesdrop, is even cuter!
Jack(ass) has been named as Charles' legal guardian...
Chuck: “Curfew?"
Jack(ass): “None."
Chuck: “Girls sleeping over?”
Jack(ass): “Yes, Please.” in his sleaziest voice yet.
Chuck: “I'll allow it.”
GAG ME!
Who knew Bart Bass was sentimental enough to actually pen a letter to his son. The way Chuck scowled at that letter and passed on reading it was so funny!
Of course B is right there when he opens the door and snatches the letter from Jack(ass) to read it aloud. Chuck saying that his dad's letter probably contains “why do you wear so much purple?” HILARIOUS! So, Bart “bequeathed” the majority share of Bass Industries to his son. And Jack(ass) speaks ill of the dead and calls him a “Son of a bitch.” Hey... isn't he also calling his own mother a bitch too? Chuck agrees with Jack(ass) and denounces that part of his inheritance, declaring that Jack(ass) can have it before storming out. That nasty wink that Jack(ass) gives Nate before he follows Chuck... “EWW!”
Serena and Eric... Eric thinks Jenny is ruining all of his dates with Jonathan. Poor E, hankering for some alone time with his boyfriend. Serena thinks that “it's a problem with the entire Humphrey clan,” because Dan's avoiding her too. Eric, always the voice of reason, says that Dan is avoiding her because he thinks their parents are getting back together.
S and E walk up and find Jenny and Jonathan planning an “Edith Head/Hitchcock” film festival. Eric is exasperated but he concedes at the look of sheer excitement on Jenny's face.
Downer Dan is still avoid-y when Serena encounters him at school and he claims that he's “a little out of it.” After assuring Serena that they're all good, Dan breaks radio silence and calls his dad. In the den of Gossip Girl country, Dan reveals that he's lying to his girlfriend to the delight of eager ears Penelope, Is, and Nelly (who's still on probation.)
The girls of the steps debate whether to tell Serena and need Blair's guidance, but she's with Chuck “again” (yay) as commented by Is in which Penelope follows with “I'm really getting sick of how much time she's spending with him.” (not me ::SQUEE::)
We pick back up with Chuck leaving the will reading and Blair running after him. He thinks that his father is setting him up to fail from beyond the grave. Blair tries to reassure him by encouraging him to read the rest of the letter, as Jack(ass) looks on from the doorway.
At school, the Gossip Girl blasts about Dan's possible cheating on Serena have started.
Chuck makes his way back to his father's office after finishing his letter “If it wasn't notarized I'd think it was a fake.” He expresses his gratitude to his uncle for saving his life when he didn't want to be saved. And Jack calls it even, because Chuck noticed that the Thai waitress he was going to take home the other night, had a penis. LOL! Then Chuck explains to Jack(ass) that he's decided to follow his father's wishes and take over Bass Industries. A decision which doesn't leave uncle Jack(ass) feeling all warm and fuzzy. He tells Chuck that “this isn't an after school job” and that he's not ready, but our Chuck tells him in very dramatic fashion, “I'm ready now.”
It looks as if the mean girls have emptied the contents of Downer Dan's locker onto the floor and B has finally made it to school. As she passes him in the hallway she kicks one of the books that he's missed back to him (to help him out of course, lol) as he gathers his things. Dan tries to catch Blair's attention as she saunters past him, but she ignores him (LOL) and answers her phone.
Jack(ass) is calling to disgustingly hit on her again apologize and make things right with Chuck (yeah right). He mentions that Chuck is his only family and Blair replies “I know. Poor Chuck. Luckily he has me.” Awwww B! My little shipper heart flutters! Jack(ass) wants to throw Chuck a party to celebrate him running the company and show their support. Blair mentions that she's having dinner with Chuck later that night and that he knows he has her support ::SQUEE:: But Jack(ass) is clever in his insidiousness and reminds Blair how she knows better than anyone how rough things have been for Chuck lately. And talks her into giving Chuck a surprise brunch.
Rufus and Lily are stalled in Boston as they close in on their son. They're having a meeting with some adoption official that tells them that he's taken things as far as he can, because their son hasn't registered with a search service. I feel really bad for Rufus here.
S&B! At school, Serena is asking Blair if she's sure that this is a good time for a flare up of what she's aptly titled “Chuck fever.” Blair gets an update from Gossip Girl, who's looking for evidence that Dan is cheating on Serena. “Not that anyone else would ever want Dan Humphrey.” LOL! Blair and Serena realize that the non-obedient minions started the Gossip Girl witch hunt and Lady B leaves S to prepare for her romantic dinner with Chuck.
Brooklyn based BFF's Dan and Vanessa go to a candy store so Vanessa can load up on confections for her two month anniversary with Nate. Vanessa's red leather messenger bag is FIERCE! Downer Dan is bringing Vanessa... well, down and she calls him on the personal storm cloud he's been walking around with for days. Nelly has an affinity for sweets too and happens upon Dan and Vanessa in the store. Dan spills to Vanessa about Rufus and Lily's secret and Vanessa spills the candy that she was gathering. TOO FUNNY! Nelly's opportunistic nature lands her Dan's cell phone while they recover the candy and then he and “V” are distracted by the UES juniors.
Jack(ass) is waiting for Chuck in his suite (he let himself in UGH!) Chuck reminds Jack(ass) that he's made his decision and Jack(ass) claims that he's there to apologize. He wants to take Chuck out to “properly celebrate” but Chuck has dinner plans with Blair. Jack(ass) expresses his disapproval of their “friendship.” He asks Chuck, “Is this who you imagined Chuck Bass to be - A man who spends his day at the office and goes home to the wife?” As much as I hate Jack(ass) he is totally referring to Blair as the wife here and Chuck doesn't even flinch, because that's how he already sees her. ::SIGH:: (I hate the character of Jack Bass so much at this point that I don't like the actor, Desmond Harrington, who portrays him now!) There's a knock on the door as Chuck is about to interrupt his uncle (probably to leave and go to Blair) but Jack(ass) announces that he's invited a few friends to join them and it turns out that these friends are of the skank variety. “What's it going to be Chuck, business and Blair or Cocktails and Coquettes?”
Serena is waiting for Vanessa at the gallery for “Boyfriend Snooping.” Vanessa feigns ignorance about what's bothering Dan and doesn't let the brother cat out of the bag. Serena's concern prompts Vanessa to send Dan a loaded text message asking him when he's going to tell S about their shared sibling.
Penelope, Hazel and Is are amazed by Nelly's thievery and are discussing her reduced probation when they receive Vanessa's text on Dan's stolen cell phone.
It looks like Chuck could have business and Blair and cocktails and coquettes (or at least one coquette, which is all he wants anyway) when he shows up for dinner. B has everything ready for her romantic dinner with Chuck (I swear Leighton looks like a Victoria's Secret model in her black sheath with the silver metallic satin ribbon, absolutely stunning), but Chuck sends her a text saying “sorry, working late. next time...” AWWWWW B!
Chuck doesn't look very pleased with himself when we see him in the limo after he cancels on Blair. It looks like “working late” involves entertaining skanks with Jack(ass) after all.
Boston the next morning reveals a very frustrated Lily and Rufus, who haven't gotten any word from the adoptive parents of the love bug. Rufus then gets a call from the official that says the adoptive parents don't want Lily and Rufus to contact them... ever.
S&B at the celebratory brunch that Blair arranged for Chuck. The party's already started without the guest of honor Jack(ass) promised to deliver. Serena notices some people she's never seen before and Blair explains that they are members of the board of Bass Industries. Apparently Jack(ass) wants Chuck to get to know them in a more casual setting. (hmm yeah right!) Serena asks Blair how her non-date with Chuck went. Blair tells her that Chuck had to reschedule and then says “spare me those expressive eyebrows. I can't wait until you get botox.” L.O.L!
Jenny and Dan arrive to show their support (for Serena and Eric) and Jenny has on the cutest cream jumper with black trim and black tights.
Blair reappears to announce Chuck's arrival with Jack(ass) and everyone starts to sing “For he's a jolly good fellow” when Jack(ass) enters, but Chuck's not with him. Blair confronts Jack(ass) and he claims that Chuck is in his office, but he doesn't know how much his nephew will be up for, after the night they've had.
Blair is interrupted by the disobedient minions asking for approval of Gossip Girl scoop, but B doesn't have time and tells them to do whatever they want.
When Blair gets back to her interrogation of Jack(ass), the board members are greeting him and inquiring about their new head of Bass Industries. Jack(ass) plays it cool and introduces Blair to the board members, then he suggests Blair escort them to visit Chuck in his office. (you can totally see this setup coming a mile away)
Jenny grabs some brunch and joins Eric. She inquires about his plans with Jonathan later and Eric decides it's time to tell her that he wants to spend time alone with Jonathan. They have an argument that ends with Jenny calling him conceited and Eric calling her annoying.
Dan and Serena are at the brunch buffet and Dan is wondering if Eclairs really can be reserved just as everyone's cell phones start chiming with the latest Gossip Girl blast. Since Blair was appropriately distracted with Chuck and couldn't weigh in on the minions latest find, Everyone has now been made aware that D&S share a sibling. Serena's face here is completely crestfallen. Poor S!
When Blair and the board members reach Chuck's office, they find him... compromised, to say the least. There's all sorts of “party favors” strewn across his desk and he's been up all night entertaining the, now scantily clad, skanks that are in his office with him. Blair's face is pure disgust and to say that the board members that accompanied her on this tour are not impressed would be an understatement.
Serena is leaving the brunch, because the news of the love bug has proved too much to handle. She asks Dan to tell her that it isn't true, but of course his prior knowledge prevents that and S realizes that he knew all along and Jenny and Eric are left dumbfounded.
Blair comes back down from that embarrassing meeting followed by the board members and Chuck attempting to pull himself together while Jack is standing against the wall looking like the cat who got the cream (Check). Chuck goes up to the board members and tries to explain that he didn't realize that they were going to be there, but the board members aren't buying it.
Blair and Chuck come face to face. “How could you?” Chuck then asks Blair if she did all this. Of course Chuck had no idea about the celebratory brunch, because Jack(ass) wanted it to be a surprise and Blair had no idea that Chuck was going to be wasted because Jack(ass) didn't tell her that he was going to take him out the night before to celebrate and all of Jack's plans fall neatly into place. (I HATE HIM!) Chuck tells Blair that he doesn't need her help and tells her to "stop trying to play the wife!” and then storms off.
Dan is following Serena to explain why he hadn't said anything to her about their secret sibling. Serena realizes now why Lily and Rufus are in Boston. Jenny and Eric have joined them outside and are inquiring about the validity of the GG blast. (I love Jenny's magenta captain's coat and I just noticed that Penn's haircut is adorable.) S leaves because she just needs to be alone.
Lily and Rufus are at odds about leaving Boston. (I can tell they're hiding Kelly Rutherford's pregnancy already) Rufus wants to meet their son at all costs and Lily doesn't want to disrupt the life and stability he has now. Their argument ends in Lily admitting to Rufus that she's still in love with him and they end up in bed together. Their son's adoptive father calls and wants to meet with them.
Chuck confronts Jack(ass) “You're my only family, how could you do this to me?” (How indeed?) His uncle reveals how resentful he is that Bart left his company to his son who “can't keep his pecker in his pants for 24 hours.” and Chuck insults him with “At least I can keep mine in service for longer than 5 minutes.” OUCH Chuck! (But good one!) Jack reveals the morality clause attached to Chuck's appointment as head of Bass Industries, the one that Chuck has egregiously violated, and how Jack will now be taking over. (Check Mate) Chuck is left clearly outraged.
Lily and Rufus finally meet with their son's adoptive father.
Serena and Eric discuss how sad it is that their mom had to give away her child with Rufus and Eric guesses, “It sounds like it's got grandma written all over it.” Eric is concerned about where his sister and Dan's relationship now stand and Serena admits that sharing a sibling with her boyfriend is a little more hillbilly than she can handle. LOL! Eric advises Serena not to push Dan away and reminds her that whatever she's going through, Dan's going though the same thing. (Eric is such a sweetheart!)
Dan arrives at the gallery looking for Vanessa, but finds Nate instead. ::awkward:: Nate tells Dan that he saw the Gossip Girl blast and tells him that he knows what he's going through and Dan brushes off Nates show of empathy in sarcastic Dan fashion. Nate relays that he does know what it feels like to have the most painful personal details of your life made public and then apologizes to Dan for what happened with Jenny (although I'm still holding to Nate not having anything to be sorry for. Dan really overreacted!) and they bury the hatchet.
Back in Boston. Lily and Rufus learn from the love bug's adoptive father of their son's tragic death and he leaves them with a newspaper clipping of his obituary.
Chuck FINALLY makes it to Blair's with flowers in hand to apologize. (I love Blair's tweed miniskirt with the pockets and her chocolate leather boots) He says “I'm sorry,” but Blair says “It's too late, Chuck.” Blair tells Chuck that she's stood by him through all of this, but can't watch him self destruct any longer. (Even though my shipper heart is bleeding for these two right now. I'm really proud of Blair for putting her foot down!) Chuck tells Blair about his uncle's set up (almost getting smacked by the elevator door in the process) and Blair tells him that he has no one to blame, but himself. She tells him that she believed in him and his father believed in him, but he didn't believe in himself and how all she wanted to do was just be there. (you can tell that this is eating Chuck alive) She tells him “Today when you called me your wife, you made it sound like the ugliest word in the world.” (This really seems to cut him deep, because Blair looks so heartbroken and vulnerable here) All Chuck can say is “Blair... please...” as he reaches for her. (OMG! Ed's voice!) But B holds steadfast and says “I'm sorry... but I'm done.” Chuck can't say anything else and backs into the elevator. Blair tosses his bouquet onto the floor of the elevator car before the door closes.
Dan and Jenny are avoiding the subject of their newest sibling as Jenny makes a PB&J sandwich and talks about renting Showgirls, which Dan refuses to watch... again just as Serena and Eric arrive to wallow with them. Dan tells Serena that the worst part was not being able to tell her the truth. They talk about what the love bug means for them and Serena tries to come up with a precedent. Dan is citing Toni Morrison and the Russian Aristocrats, while Serena pulls from pop culture with Clueless. (Because Cher hooked up with Josh, who was her ex-stepbrother ::SIGH:: I LOVE that movie)
Eric and Jenny attempt simultaneous apologizes for their earlier argument. (but Eric wins) She says that he has a right to want to be alone with Jonathan. Eric agrees and says that doesn't mean she gets on his nerves... that much. LOL!
Our Boy Billionaire has come full circle today and has made it back to his suite, where he's now angrily stripping off his father's read tie and turning away from the mirror.
The love bug's adoptive parents are meeting at the restaurant where Lily and Rufus left and they discuss how it was necessary to lie to them about their son's “death” because they've already lost one son and can't lose another.
Lily and Rufus arrive in Brooklyn and Lily muses “maybe they weren't meant to be a family” just as Rufus opens the door to Dan, Serena, Jenny and Eric sitting around the breakfast bar.
In the Preview:
Dan and Serena are walking up to the school together and he asks “Who's the new kid?” Serena says, “That kid is my Shakespeare teacher.”
Blair is sitting with Penelope, Hazel, and Is as Serena and Dan walk up and Penelope says, “A new teacher is like a child, it has to be taught.” Hazel follows with “And spanked.”
Then Blair is shown talking to the new teacher in the hallway outside of a classroom saying, “This is a B, you're new here so you don't know how it works.” as she grabs the teacher by the arm and walks off with her.
Voiceover of Blair saying “I need to keep my GPA perfect if I'm going to get into Yale.” as she's shown hugging Serena in the hallway at school and walking into her living room to Dorota with her father and Roman all glad in Yale apparel.
The new teacher is shown talking to Blair and saying, “you should have thought of that before.”
Then Blair and Dorota (walking a dog) are shown walking through the halls of the school. Dorota asks, “Is it war?” and Blair says, “A war I'm going to win!”
So I guess we averted the Blair/Jack(ass) did they/didn't they stuff that was never addressed in this episode. I for one am glad. That man is. on. my. list!
Awww Chuck's face as he's putting on (what I think is his father's) red tie is so “little boy lost.” It just breaks my heart! (note to self, grab screen cap of this scene because Ed looks adorable!)
Chuck has asked Blair to come to the reading of the will for support and she walks up on Jack(ass) standing outside looking awfully smug. Jack(ass) resumes his creepy come-ons and Blair, sans headband, knocks him down “Whatever may have transpired between us, what's important is what it means to me, which is nothing.” Don't you just love B?!
Que my fandom boyfriend Chuck's entrance as uncle Jack(ass) gives him a pep talk. I couldn't help but notice how Blair was looking at Chuck in this scene, like she wanted to touch him so badly, offer him some comfort. She even grazes her gloved hand down his coat sleeve, absently. ::SIGH:: And it was nice of the writers to remember that Nate is Chuck's best friend and actually have him show up to offer his support as well. (Hi Nate!)
JENNY! in an amazing gray and black striped scarf cardigan with Dan talking about Rufus “hooking up” with Lily on their trip to Boston. ::awkward:: It sounds like Taylor has a cold, but that's probably just me paying WAY too much attention to her. Dan ignoring Serena's call TSK TSK Dan!
Back to all things Chuck. Blair and Nate are sitting outside of the will reading and Blair says, “I wouldn't have come to this party if I knew I wasn't V.I.P.” LOL! Blair's gray tights are really cute, but Blair shh-ing Nate, as she presses her ear to the door to attempt to eavesdrop, is even cuter!
Jack(ass) has been named as Charles' legal guardian...
Chuck: “Curfew?"
Jack(ass): “None."
Chuck: “Girls sleeping over?”
Jack(ass): “Yes, Please.” in his sleaziest voice yet.
Chuck: “I'll allow it.”
GAG ME!
Who knew Bart Bass was sentimental enough to actually pen a letter to his son. The way Chuck scowled at that letter and passed on reading it was so funny!
Of course B is right there when he opens the door and snatches the letter from Jack(ass) to read it aloud. Chuck saying that his dad's letter probably contains “why do you wear so much purple?” HILARIOUS! So, Bart “bequeathed” the majority share of Bass Industries to his son. And Jack(ass) speaks ill of the dead and calls him a “Son of a bitch.” Hey... isn't he also calling his own mother a bitch too? Chuck agrees with Jack(ass) and denounces that part of his inheritance, declaring that Jack(ass) can have it before storming out. That nasty wink that Jack(ass) gives Nate before he follows Chuck... “EWW!”
Serena and Eric... Eric thinks Jenny is ruining all of his dates with Jonathan. Poor E, hankering for some alone time with his boyfriend. Serena thinks that “it's a problem with the entire Humphrey clan,” because Dan's avoiding her too. Eric, always the voice of reason, says that Dan is avoiding her because he thinks their parents are getting back together.
S and E walk up and find Jenny and Jonathan planning an “Edith Head/Hitchcock” film festival. Eric is exasperated but he concedes at the look of sheer excitement on Jenny's face.
Downer Dan is still avoid-y when Serena encounters him at school and he claims that he's “a little out of it.” After assuring Serena that they're all good, Dan breaks radio silence and calls his dad. In the den of Gossip Girl country, Dan reveals that he's lying to his girlfriend to the delight of eager ears Penelope, Is, and Nelly (who's still on probation.)
The girls of the steps debate whether to tell Serena and need Blair's guidance, but she's with Chuck “again” (yay) as commented by Is in which Penelope follows with “I'm really getting sick of how much time she's spending with him.” (not me ::SQUEE::)
We pick back up with Chuck leaving the will reading and Blair running after him. He thinks that his father is setting him up to fail from beyond the grave. Blair tries to reassure him by encouraging him to read the rest of the letter, as Jack(ass) looks on from the doorway.
At school, the Gossip Girl blasts about Dan's possible cheating on Serena have started.
Chuck makes his way back to his father's office after finishing his letter “If it wasn't notarized I'd think it was a fake.” He expresses his gratitude to his uncle for saving his life when he didn't want to be saved. And Jack calls it even, because Chuck noticed that the Thai waitress he was going to take home the other night, had a penis. LOL! Then Chuck explains to Jack(ass) that he's decided to follow his father's wishes and take over Bass Industries. A decision which doesn't leave uncle Jack(ass) feeling all warm and fuzzy. He tells Chuck that “this isn't an after school job” and that he's not ready, but our Chuck tells him in very dramatic fashion, “I'm ready now.”
It looks as if the mean girls have emptied the contents of Downer Dan's locker onto the floor and B has finally made it to school. As she passes him in the hallway she kicks one of the books that he's missed back to him (to help him out of course, lol) as he gathers his things. Dan tries to catch Blair's attention as she saunters past him, but she ignores him (LOL) and answers her phone.
Jack(ass) is calling to disgustingly hit on her again apologize and make things right with Chuck (yeah right). He mentions that Chuck is his only family and Blair replies “I know. Poor Chuck. Luckily he has me.” Awwww B! My little shipper heart flutters! Jack(ass) wants to throw Chuck a party to celebrate him running the company and show their support. Blair mentions that she's having dinner with Chuck later that night and that he knows he has her support ::SQUEE:: But Jack(ass) is clever in his insidiousness and reminds Blair how she knows better than anyone how rough things have been for Chuck lately. And talks her into giving Chuck a surprise brunch.
Rufus and Lily are stalled in Boston as they close in on their son. They're having a meeting with some adoption official that tells them that he's taken things as far as he can, because their son hasn't registered with a search service. I feel really bad for Rufus here.
S&B! At school, Serena is asking Blair if she's sure that this is a good time for a flare up of what she's aptly titled “Chuck fever.” Blair gets an update from Gossip Girl, who's looking for evidence that Dan is cheating on Serena. “Not that anyone else would ever want Dan Humphrey.” LOL! Blair and Serena realize that the non-obedient minions started the Gossip Girl witch hunt and Lady B leaves S to prepare for her romantic dinner with Chuck.
Brooklyn based BFF's Dan and Vanessa go to a candy store so Vanessa can load up on confections for her two month anniversary with Nate. Vanessa's red leather messenger bag is FIERCE! Downer Dan is bringing Vanessa... well, down and she calls him on the personal storm cloud he's been walking around with for days. Nelly has an affinity for sweets too and happens upon Dan and Vanessa in the store. Dan spills to Vanessa about Rufus and Lily's secret and Vanessa spills the candy that she was gathering. TOO FUNNY! Nelly's opportunistic nature lands her Dan's cell phone while they recover the candy and then he and “V” are distracted by the UES juniors.
Jack(ass) is waiting for Chuck in his suite (he let himself in UGH!) Chuck reminds Jack(ass) that he's made his decision and Jack(ass) claims that he's there to apologize. He wants to take Chuck out to “properly celebrate” but Chuck has dinner plans with Blair. Jack(ass) expresses his disapproval of their “friendship.” He asks Chuck, “Is this who you imagined Chuck Bass to be - A man who spends his day at the office and goes home to the wife?” As much as I hate Jack(ass) he is totally referring to Blair as the wife here and Chuck doesn't even flinch, because that's how he already sees her. ::SIGH:: (I hate the character of Jack Bass so much at this point that I don't like the actor, Desmond Harrington, who portrays him now!) There's a knock on the door as Chuck is about to interrupt his uncle (probably to leave and go to Blair) but Jack(ass) announces that he's invited a few friends to join them and it turns out that these friends are of the skank variety. “What's it going to be Chuck, business and Blair or Cocktails and Coquettes?”
Serena is waiting for Vanessa at the gallery for “Boyfriend Snooping.” Vanessa feigns ignorance about what's bothering Dan and doesn't let the brother cat out of the bag. Serena's concern prompts Vanessa to send Dan a loaded text message asking him when he's going to tell S about their shared sibling.
Penelope, Hazel and Is are amazed by Nelly's thievery and are discussing her reduced probation when they receive Vanessa's text on Dan's stolen cell phone.
It looks like Chuck could have business and Blair and cocktails and coquettes (or at least one coquette, which is all he wants anyway) when he shows up for dinner. B has everything ready for her romantic dinner with Chuck (I swear Leighton looks like a Victoria's Secret model in her black sheath with the silver metallic satin ribbon, absolutely stunning), but Chuck sends her a text saying “sorry, working late. next time...” AWWWWW B!
Chuck doesn't look very pleased with himself when we see him in the limo after he cancels on Blair. It looks like “working late” involves entertaining skanks with Jack(ass) after all.
Boston the next morning reveals a very frustrated Lily and Rufus, who haven't gotten any word from the adoptive parents of the love bug. Rufus then gets a call from the official that says the adoptive parents don't want Lily and Rufus to contact them... ever.
S&B at the celebratory brunch that Blair arranged for Chuck. The party's already started without the guest of honor Jack(ass) promised to deliver. Serena notices some people she's never seen before and Blair explains that they are members of the board of Bass Industries. Apparently Jack(ass) wants Chuck to get to know them in a more casual setting. (hmm yeah right!) Serena asks Blair how her non-date with Chuck went. Blair tells her that Chuck had to reschedule and then says “spare me those expressive eyebrows. I can't wait until you get botox.” L.O.L!
Jenny and Dan arrive to show their support (for Serena and Eric) and Jenny has on the cutest cream jumper with black trim and black tights.
Blair reappears to announce Chuck's arrival with Jack(ass) and everyone starts to sing “For he's a jolly good fellow” when Jack(ass) enters, but Chuck's not with him. Blair confronts Jack(ass) and he claims that Chuck is in his office, but he doesn't know how much his nephew will be up for, after the night they've had.
Blair is interrupted by the disobedient minions asking for approval of Gossip Girl scoop, but B doesn't have time and tells them to do whatever they want.
When Blair gets back to her interrogation of Jack(ass), the board members are greeting him and inquiring about their new head of Bass Industries. Jack(ass) plays it cool and introduces Blair to the board members, then he suggests Blair escort them to visit Chuck in his office. (you can totally see this setup coming a mile away)
Jenny grabs some brunch and joins Eric. She inquires about his plans with Jonathan later and Eric decides it's time to tell her that he wants to spend time alone with Jonathan. They have an argument that ends with Jenny calling him conceited and Eric calling her annoying.
Dan and Serena are at the brunch buffet and Dan is wondering if Eclairs really can be reserved just as everyone's cell phones start chiming with the latest Gossip Girl blast. Since Blair was appropriately distracted with Chuck and couldn't weigh in on the minions latest find, Everyone has now been made aware that D&S share a sibling. Serena's face here is completely crestfallen. Poor S!
When Blair and the board members reach Chuck's office, they find him... compromised, to say the least. There's all sorts of “party favors” strewn across his desk and he's been up all night entertaining the, now scantily clad, skanks that are in his office with him. Blair's face is pure disgust and to say that the board members that accompanied her on this tour are not impressed would be an understatement.
Serena is leaving the brunch, because the news of the love bug has proved too much to handle. She asks Dan to tell her that it isn't true, but of course his prior knowledge prevents that and S realizes that he knew all along and Jenny and Eric are left dumbfounded.
Blair comes back down from that embarrassing meeting followed by the board members and Chuck attempting to pull himself together while Jack is standing against the wall looking like the cat who got the cream (Check). Chuck goes up to the board members and tries to explain that he didn't realize that they were going to be there, but the board members aren't buying it.
Blair and Chuck come face to face. “How could you?” Chuck then asks Blair if she did all this. Of course Chuck had no idea about the celebratory brunch, because Jack(ass) wanted it to be a surprise and Blair had no idea that Chuck was going to be wasted because Jack(ass) didn't tell her that he was going to take him out the night before to celebrate and all of Jack's plans fall neatly into place. (I HATE HIM!) Chuck tells Blair that he doesn't need her help and tells her to "stop trying to play the wife!” and then storms off.
Dan is following Serena to explain why he hadn't said anything to her about their secret sibling. Serena realizes now why Lily and Rufus are in Boston. Jenny and Eric have joined them outside and are inquiring about the validity of the GG blast. (I love Jenny's magenta captain's coat and I just noticed that Penn's haircut is adorable.) S leaves because she just needs to be alone.
Lily and Rufus are at odds about leaving Boston. (I can tell they're hiding Kelly Rutherford's pregnancy already) Rufus wants to meet their son at all costs and Lily doesn't want to disrupt the life and stability he has now. Their argument ends in Lily admitting to Rufus that she's still in love with him and they end up in bed together. Their son's adoptive father calls and wants to meet with them.
Chuck confronts Jack(ass) “You're my only family, how could you do this to me?” (How indeed?) His uncle reveals how resentful he is that Bart left his company to his son who “can't keep his pecker in his pants for 24 hours.” and Chuck insults him with “At least I can keep mine in service for longer than 5 minutes.” OUCH Chuck! (But good one!) Jack reveals the morality clause attached to Chuck's appointment as head of Bass Industries, the one that Chuck has egregiously violated, and how Jack will now be taking over. (Check Mate) Chuck is left clearly outraged.
Lily and Rufus finally meet with their son's adoptive father.
Serena and Eric discuss how sad it is that their mom had to give away her child with Rufus and Eric guesses, “It sounds like it's got grandma written all over it.” Eric is concerned about where his sister and Dan's relationship now stand and Serena admits that sharing a sibling with her boyfriend is a little more hillbilly than she can handle. LOL! Eric advises Serena not to push Dan away and reminds her that whatever she's going through, Dan's going though the same thing. (Eric is such a sweetheart!)
Dan arrives at the gallery looking for Vanessa, but finds Nate instead. ::awkward:: Nate tells Dan that he saw the Gossip Girl blast and tells him that he knows what he's going through and Dan brushes off Nates show of empathy in sarcastic Dan fashion. Nate relays that he does know what it feels like to have the most painful personal details of your life made public and then apologizes to Dan for what happened with Jenny (although I'm still holding to Nate not having anything to be sorry for. Dan really overreacted!) and they bury the hatchet.
Back in Boston. Lily and Rufus learn from the love bug's adoptive father of their son's tragic death and he leaves them with a newspaper clipping of his obituary.
Chuck FINALLY makes it to Blair's with flowers in hand to apologize. (I love Blair's tweed miniskirt with the pockets and her chocolate leather boots) He says “I'm sorry,” but Blair says “It's too late, Chuck.” Blair tells Chuck that she's stood by him through all of this, but can't watch him self destruct any longer. (Even though my shipper heart is bleeding for these two right now. I'm really proud of Blair for putting her foot down!) Chuck tells Blair about his uncle's set up (almost getting smacked by the elevator door in the process) and Blair tells him that he has no one to blame, but himself. She tells him that she believed in him and his father believed in him, but he didn't believe in himself and how all she wanted to do was just be there. (you can tell that this is eating Chuck alive) She tells him “Today when you called me your wife, you made it sound like the ugliest word in the world.” (This really seems to cut him deep, because Blair looks so heartbroken and vulnerable here) All Chuck can say is “Blair... please...” as he reaches for her. (OMG! Ed's voice!) But B holds steadfast and says “I'm sorry... but I'm done.” Chuck can't say anything else and backs into the elevator. Blair tosses his bouquet onto the floor of the elevator car before the door closes.
Dan and Jenny are avoiding the subject of their newest sibling as Jenny makes a PB&J sandwich and talks about renting Showgirls, which Dan refuses to watch... again just as Serena and Eric arrive to wallow with them. Dan tells Serena that the worst part was not being able to tell her the truth. They talk about what the love bug means for them and Serena tries to come up with a precedent. Dan is citing Toni Morrison and the Russian Aristocrats, while Serena pulls from pop culture with Clueless. (Because Cher hooked up with Josh, who was her ex-stepbrother ::SIGH:: I LOVE that movie)
Eric and Jenny attempt simultaneous apologizes for their earlier argument. (but Eric wins) She says that he has a right to want to be alone with Jonathan. Eric agrees and says that doesn't mean she gets on his nerves... that much. LOL!
Our Boy Billionaire has come full circle today and has made it back to his suite, where he's now angrily stripping off his father's read tie and turning away from the mirror.
The love bug's adoptive parents are meeting at the restaurant where Lily and Rufus left and they discuss how it was necessary to lie to them about their son's “death” because they've already lost one son and can't lose another.
Lily and Rufus arrive in Brooklyn and Lily muses “maybe they weren't meant to be a family” just as Rufus opens the door to Dan, Serena, Jenny and Eric sitting around the breakfast bar.
In the Preview:
Dan and Serena are walking up to the school together and he asks “Who's the new kid?” Serena says, “That kid is my Shakespeare teacher.”
Blair is sitting with Penelope, Hazel, and Is as Serena and Dan walk up and Penelope says, “A new teacher is like a child, it has to be taught.” Hazel follows with “And spanked.”
Then Blair is shown talking to the new teacher in the hallway outside of a classroom saying, “This is a B, you're new here so you don't know how it works.” as she grabs the teacher by the arm and walks off with her.
Voiceover of Blair saying “I need to keep my GPA perfect if I'm going to get into Yale.” as she's shown hugging Serena in the hallway at school and walking into her living room to Dorota with her father and Roman all glad in Yale apparel.
The new teacher is shown talking to Blair and saying, “you should have thought of that before.”
Then Blair and Dorota (walking a dog) are shown walking through the halls of the school. Dorota asks, “Is it war?” and Blair says, “A war I'm going to win!”
So I guess we averted the Blair/Jack(ass) did they/didn't they stuff that was never addressed in this episode. I for one am glad. That man is. on. my. list!