Following in Trogula's footsteps.
Answer these questions thoughtfully and completely. Save them. At the
end of the course, review your answers and consider whether any of them
would change.
Support Systems:
What is your living situation?
I live with two cats. My sweetheart and I will be moving in together sometime in October.
Do your family or housemates support your spiritual practice? Will they allow you the privacy in which to practice the exercises? If you are in doubt, negotiate, or find somewhere else to work.
My sweetheart, being something of a Freyasman, is fully supportive of any magical working I choose to undertake.
Do you belong to a circle, kindred, coven, or other spiritual/magical group?
I am a Devotee of American Magic Umbanda House. I attend meeings and parties of The Vanic Conspiracy infrequently.
What kinds of trancework does it practice? How often? For what purposes? Are any other group members in this class? Will your group
support your work here?
Our Umanda house does, and The Vanic Conspiracy does, w/in the context of monthly Bembes and Trance Parties. Trance is used to strengthen ties to both the Gods, and ourselves/our community. Both groups are very supportive of this work, and several members of both groups are in this class.
Do you already have a power animal or totem or other ally (e.g. a specific Ancestor, Fey, Plant, or Elemental spirit)? For each of them:
What/who are they? How did you acquire them? How often do you contact them, or how do they contact you?
In the last iteration of this class, I found several animal allies: a snow leopard, a skunk, a parrot, a heron, and an egret. Mostly I would contact them during my journeywork; sometimes they have *pinged* me at odd times throughout my daily life. Over the last couple of months my contact w/ them has faded; Skunk especially has found his way Elsewhere, while the birds have simply... faded. Snow Leopard is still around, but only in a very specific place at this time. Since the first meeting of this class, Peacock, Seagull, and Dolphin have made their presence felt in my life during journeywork. I have a natural, almost life-long, affinity for cats.
Background:
How do you make a living? What states of consciousness or mental skills do you use in your job, and how did you learn to attain them?
I am an Administrative Assistant for the Facilities Department of a local computer company. I have a couple of days each month where I need to be hyper-focused and organized. The rest of the time... I don't. Um... I didn't "learn to attain them", it's just a thing I do.
What other work or hobbies do you spend time on? What states of consciousness do you use? How did you learn to attain them?
Middle Eastern Dance was a big hobby of mine for the last decade. It requires a level of physical concentration that my day job does not. Again, it's not a thing that I consciously learned. It's a thing, a... a place that I naturally go to.
What is your Academic training? What kind of thinking did your department teach?
Aside from high school, a few jr. college classes in English, and some trade school courses, I have no Higher Education. I was not taught to think in a specific discipline. I am not an "academic" nor do I think like one. I can see pieces of a puzzle; I cannot put them together to create a whole picture.
What is your Spiritual/Magical training? How did you acquire it? What kinds of thinking did you learn?
I read Starhawk and Z Budapest first, around 1988-1990, I don't exactly remember. Margot Adler, Doreen Valiente, and Sanaya Roman quickly followed. I wanted to learn to channel almost as soon as I learned what it was but never followed through w/ the course; it seemed pretty hokey to me. Some more reading followed, but not a whole lot of practice. Candle magic, faery magic; interesting, not compelling. I mdea few friends in Hrafnar and HammerOak but I am simply not Norse (my contact w/ Freya notwithstanding). It wasn't until I attended my second PantheaCon in 2004 that I found a couple of solid paths to investigate: The Kemetics, and the Umbandists. They did/do not teach a specific way to think, to the best of my knowledge; I could be quite mistaken about that, however.
What strengths or skills do you already have which will help you in trance work? What do you think will be hardest to learn?
I have a good ability to visualize; I can imagine almost anything. The hardest thing to learn will be to "let go", to make that... leap, as it were, to let someone Else do more than just shadow.
Physiology/Psychology
How old are you?
46
What is your general state of health?
Very good.
Where would you rate your temperament on a continuum in the following areas?
calm_____________________X____________________lively
forceful__________________________X____________responsive
robust_____________________X__________________ sensitive
How do you react to stress?
It really depends. At times, it helps me to focus so that I can accomplish a specific task. Other times it makes me angry, or crumbles me to bits.
Do you have any chronic or cyclical problems or conditions (especially heart, blood pressure, diabetic, menstrual or menopause,etc.)? Are you
on any medications? (If you have any condition which could be affected by changes in heartbeat, blood pressure, etc., or are on a medication that
affects your focus and state of consciousness, let me know-DLP)
No, by and large.
How do you react to alcohol, drugs?
It really depends on my mood, the setting, and if I have to drive or not. I am not against their use for recreation or ritual.
How much and what kind of exercise do you get?
Very little at time.
Have you ever had a life-threatening accident or illness? Did you have any weird experiences during the crisis? Did it change your attitude
towards life?
No.
Have you been in counselling? What kind and for what? How did you respond to it?
I have been in counselling off and on since 1977, mostly for relationship issues. I responded slowly, but well; for therapy to work for me, I need to find a specifc type of therapist. It was not always my good luck to. I recieved a diagnosis of "depression" a few years ago and anti-depressants were prescribed for me; they did nothing to allievate the feelings so I weaned myself off of them, got out of the situation and have been mostly fine since then.
Do you have a history of dissociation? What kind?
No.
Skills/knowledge
How would you rate yourself on the following?
need to learn adequate excellent
relaxation _________________________X________________________________
breath control ____________________________X_____________________________
visualization __________________________________________X_______________
lucid dreaming _______X__________________________________________________
self-hypnosis _________X________________________________________________
shamanic journeying ____X_________________________________________________
sensing/ moving energy ______X___________________________________________
divination ___X______________________________________________________
folk magic ___X______________________________________________________
mythology _______________________X__________________________________
Shamanism ___X______________________________________________________
Jungian psych. __X_______________________________________________________
Purpose
Briefly, describe your goals in taking this training. At the end of it, what would you like to be and do?
I want to learn trance so that I can perform it both safely, and with intent. As Wayne said, I intend to use this practice in fellowship with the gods:
by the end of the class, I want to achieve a clear, strong connexion w/ a specific Deity at will, not as a side effect of some other thing.