If It's For You
Title: If It's For You
Length: Oneshot
Pairing: Yunho/Jaejoong
Genre: AU, Romance
Summary: Do you do things only for someone? Or is it for the sake of the both of you?
Yunho always takes things seriously.
He gives more than he's asked for, always ready when one needs him at all times, even when it makes Jaejoong feels like he's living with a social service guy.
Yunho also takes their relationship seriously.
If same sex marriage would be legalized in their country, Jaejoong is sure that Yunho will be the first line to register theirs. After 5 years living together, Yunho has always been the one who makes sure that there's no dirty laundry left in the weekend even though it's Jaejoong's turn to do it. He makes sure to call Jaejoong every morning and every night on his business trip even if Jaejoong would complain over his mobile phone bill. He remembers every birthday, every anniversary, every important dates; down to Jaejoong's parents' anniversary.
So Jaejoong didn’t know whether to be surprised or supposed to be expecting it when one day out of the blue during breakfast Yunho asked him: "What do you think about children?"
Jaejoong thought that Yunho was testing him, he knew that Jaejoong doesn't like any idea of having another human being under their roof. So he laughed and replied, "You serious? Well, if it's for you, maybe I don't mind to try."
"Only if it's for me? Just because of me?"
"You know my point of view about us. About you and me."
"But it's not just for me. It's also for you. For us."
Jaejoong sighed, seeing an argument about to explode soon. "Yunho... Give me some time to think about it." He was just saying that, hoping that it'd be forgotten soon.
Yunho nodded and smiled to him. He picked up his spoon again and continue eating his breakfast.
~o~o~
Jaejoong is a carefree creature.
He takes things lightly, enjoying life as much as he can though he knows that he's annoying Yunho most of the time. He knows that Yunho will stay, he won't leave. His parents told him that he's taking Yunho for granted and that he'll regret it when the day comes; when Yunho realized he's not the one. Jaejoong laughed at them.
Growing up as a spoiled only child turned him into someone who thinks other people but family is nuisance. The reason that he even surprised he would last that long being with Yunho. He thought it should be enough.
But after the talk about children, Yunho really did create a distance between them. They didn't touch as often, no more spontaneous sex in the middle of the night, though he never missed to kiss him at every single chance they have.
So Jaejoong's world was crumbling to pieces when he received a call from Yunho's colleague who was traveling with him on a business trip.
Train accident. Coma. Hospital.
He called his parents in hysterics, asking them to drive him to where Yunho was; knowing that he didn’t have the strength to think clearly, let alone drive himself for 2 hours. By the time they reached the hospital, Jajoong's tears had dried up as he stared into nothingness but the tubes around his beloved Yunho. He could hear nothing but the sound of the beeping machine next to him.
~o~o~
Day after day he stayed by Yunho's side... held his hand, talked to him, cleaned him up... His parents returned home after a week, and Jaejoong called in his resignation 2 weeks later.
But Yunho hadn’t woken up.
One day he couldn't take the silence anymore... he wept, head on the comatose man's chest. "Why won't you wake up? Don't you love me anymore? Do you like to see me broken like this? Wake up, baby... wake up for me!"
A soft knock by the door woke him up from his lamentation. A tall guy smiled at him, Changmin was it? The one who called him, who was with Yunho on that business trip but survived the accident due to a change of schedule that held him back another day. A cup of coffee later they started to talk.
"I'm sorry about what happened to Yunho. I've heard a lot about you, he loved you so much."
Jaejoong chuckled, "Did he tell you only the good things about me?"
"Well, I almost think that you're a saint if I took evertyhing he said by heart."
Jaejoong's smile disappeared. "He loved me that much, didn't he? There was not a good thing that I have done for him, I've been such an egotistical person. I wonder what he saw in me that he stayed for so long." He closed his eyes as he tried to remember what good thing he had done for him, but he couldn’t remember any.
"I guess it's true when people say that love is blind." Changmin smiled. "He loved you... loves you... that's why. That's the only reason that makes sense for me about his adoration towards you."
Jaejoong opened his eyes, he saw sincerity in Changmin's eyes. "Thanks, though I don't really think that I deserve it."
"Maybe... so did you agree about the adoption?"
It a surprise that Changmin knew.
"Yunho told you? Ah, yes... I haven't decided. Our relationship is already complicated as it is, I don't see why he would want to add more consideration about children." He sighed. "I really don't know what to answer to him."
"Oh... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interfere, but... He was really thinking about you when he came up with the idea."
Puzzled, Jaejoong shot a questioning gaze at him.
"He told me about your… pardon me- inability to socialize... I'm sorry to say this, but you don't have many friends, do you? He's worried about you. If something happens to you, he could find consolation in his friends, his works. But if something happens to him, who would you run to? Your parents definitely; but there's no one else who might be able to understand you like he does. But when there's a child... that child might grow in understanding about you, about the relationship between you two... and maybe, just maybe the child will be the one who can help you get through your darkest moment when he's not there. He knows what it feels being lonely... he was living in loneliness after he lost his parents and before he met you."
Jaejoong was speechless. Changmin interpreted it as something else as he awkwardly said to him, "I’m very sorry! I'm not trying to meddle into your affair! It's just... I hope that I can have someone like him too, I envy you. You're lucky... everything is about you... you and him."
Long after Changmin has left, Jaejoong was still sitting at the same place, holding his empty cup of coffee, thinking about Yunho... about them.
~o~o~
Days turned into weeks, weeks into months.
It's almost the end of the third month of Yunho's coma. Jaejoong was doing his daily ritual... lying on the hospital bed next to Yunho, holding his hands, talking to him. But this time he's talking about changing... about being a better person.
"I've been blind for not realizing just how lucky I have been to have you. Your patience amazed me and your love has made me live. I want to be a better person for you, I don't mind about children, I would say yes to whatever you ask me to. If it's for you... I'd do anything. Just wake up... for me... I'll change, for you..." He cried silently, wetting his man's patient gown with his tears.
Just then he a felt a tug on his finger... he thought it's just him. But a hoarse voice was speaking to his ear, "Just for me?"
~o~o~
Yunho had a speedy recovery. Thanks to Jaejoong who was always there tending to his every needs, helping him with his therapy. And when he's finally home, they spent their first day home cuddling in front of the tv, just enjoying each other's presence. Jaejoong couldn’t be more thankful as he inhaled Yunho's sweet scent, feeling the touch of his skin and his breath in his ear. He felt his lover nudged his rib.
"I heard you."
"Hm? What did you hear?"
"Everything you told me when I was sleeping. I heard you."
Jaejoong rested his head on Yunho's shoulder, circling his hands around him. "You did? I hope you believe me... Everything I said, I meant them. Still do."
"I do believe you." He whispered, "I don't want you to change, though, I love you just the way you are."
Jaejoong looked up and stared into his eyes. "No. I want to be a better person. I don't mind to change, if it's for you."
Yunho's gaze was so full of loving that Jaejoong knew he would give his life for this man.
"Just for me?"
There was silence for a moment before Jaejoong's laughter broke it as he pulled Yunho's face close to him and gave him his best kiss. A kiss as if it would be their last.
He cupped the face of the man he loved with his life as he told him with a smile, "For us."
END