movie & tv quotes
TV
Scrubs
"Nothing worth having comes easy."
Kids in the Hall
Bank People
Crazy Banker: "I look at Ms. Manythroats and it's like, "Who would fuck you?" She should be bisexual, it would increase her chances. But someday, I'll go crazy. I'll eat pancakes on her grave! Fuck my diet. Fuck the bank I work for, fuck the bank! I'll be quittin' soon. Fuck the b-b-b-bank."
Pit of Ultimate Darkness: Employee-Employer Exchange
Hecubus: Now, Master, tell me, do you like 16-year-old girls?
Sir Simon Milligan: No, I do not.. LIKE 16-year-old girls. That would be wrong.
Hecubus: Then let me rephrase the question.
Sir Simon Milligan: Oh, you bastard.
Hecubus: Do you.. do you lust after 16-year-old girls?
Sir Simon Milligan: [whimpers] Yes, oh God, yes! [points to himself] Evil, evil!
MOVIES
Velvet Goldmine
Brian Slade: "I knew I should create a sensation," gasped the rocket, and he went out.
Brian Slade: Nothing makes one so vain as being told one is a sinner.
Brian Slade: Worlds, Mandy, are built out of suffering. There's suffering at the birth of a child as at the birth of a star.
Mandy Slade: You live in terror of not being misunderstood.
Arthur Stuart: He called it a freedom. A freedom you can allow yourself. Or not.
Curt Wild: I forget where we were. We were on a trip. But he said to me, "Curt, a man's life is his image." Here. Why don't you hang on to it.
Arthur Stuart: Me?
Curt Wild: Sure. Why not? I've had it too long anyway. Go ahead. For your image.
Curt Wild: Listen. A real artist creates beautiful things, and puts nothing of his own life into them, okay?
Arthur Stuart: Is that what you did?
Curt Wild: No. We set out to change the world. Ended up just changin' ourselves.
Arthur Stuart: What's wrong with that?
Curt Wild: Nothing. If you don't look at the world.
Reporter: Brian, why the makeup?
Brian Slade: Why? Because rock and roll is a prostitute. It should be tarted up, performed. The music is the mask, while I, in my chiffon and taff, well, varda the message.
Reporter: What about your fans, aren't they likely to get the wrong impression?
Brian Slade: And which "wrong impression" is that?
Reporter: Well, that you're a blinking fruit.
Brian Slade: -laughs- Well, thank you sir, and no. It doesn't concern me in the least. I should think that if people were to get the wrong impression of me, the one to which you so eloquently refer, it wouldn't be the wrong impression in the slightest. I mean, everybody knows most people are bisexual.
Reporter: I was under the impression that you were married and living in North London.
Brian Slade: I am married. Quite happily, in fact. I just happen to like boys as much as I like girls, and since my wife is pretty much the same about such things, I should think we've been able to make a fairly decent go of it so far.
Mandy Slade: What's true about music is true about life: The beauty reveals everything because it expresses nothing.
Woman: I'm not really myself, except, in the midst of elegant crowds, at the heart of rich districts, amid the sumptuous ornamentation of palace hotels, an army of servants, and plush carpet underfoot.
Brian Slade: Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask and he'll tell you the truth.
Curt Wild: The world is changed 'cause you are made of ivory and gold. The curves of your lips rewrite history.
Curt Wild: Excuse me, fellas, while I raise a glass to the loveliest man in Europe.
Brian Slade: And they tell you it's not natural.
Reporter: So you're saying you're bisexual?
Boy: Yeah. I like boys, I like girls. They're all great! No difference, is there? Mr. BBC.
Joshua Tree
Rita Marrick:Why do you wanna die? You think it's romantic? You think some girl's gonna cry for you?
Rita Marrick: So what did you do? Your crime, I mean. Something serious?
Wellman Anthony Santee: I turned away from Jesus.
Wellman Anthony Santee: What day is it? What day is it?
E.G.: Tuesday or Thursday.
Wellman Anthony Santee: What day, I asked ya?
E.G.: Friday!
Wellman Anthony Santee: Well I'll be dead by Sunday.
Wellman Anthony Santee: Is there an off switch to your mouth?
Wellman Anthony Santee: I never said I was running for Pope.
B. Monkey
Beatrice: He doesn't give a fuck about you, you know that?
Bruno: Nobody's ever given a fuck about me except you, Bea. Not Paul, not anybody. Does he love you?
Beatrice: I think so, yeah.
Bruno: Would he die for you? 'Cause I'd die for you, you know that, Bea.
Beatrice: I know.
Beatrice: I love you, Bruno. Just you fucking remember that.
Bruno: Because I'm lovely.
A Love Song for Bobby Long
Lawson Pines: Bobby Long's tragic flaw was his romance with all that he saw. And I guess if people want to believe in some form of justice, then Bobby Long got his for a song.
Lawson Pines: Autumn comes slowly in New Orleans. The grass remains a stubborn green, but the heat gives way to a gentle warmth. Pursy did begin to catch on in school. She was surprised. We weren't. Winter arrived before we realized the sunlit hours of summer had waned. So now the wine began to outlast the day and that was more than anyone could've asked for.
Lawson Pines: Winter never feels truly at home in New Orleans. An unwelcome visitor that shows up long enough to remind us of what we're missing, then leaves us just in time for us to forget again.
Agent Red
Linda: What are you going to do?
Matt: Make a little noise. Do a little damage.
Linda: ...Get down tonight.
American Psycho
Patrick: You're a fucking ugly bitch. I want to stab you to death, then play around with your blood.
Patrick: Sabrina, don't just stare at it. Eat it.
Jean: Well, maybe we shouldn't go out to dinner. I don't want to ruin your willpower.
Patrick: No, it's alright. I'm not very good at controlling it anyway.
Patrick: Did you know that Ted Bundy's first dog, a collie, was named Lassie? -laughs-
Lost in Translation
Charlotte: Let's never come here again because it will never be as much fun.
Donnie Darko
Donnie: I hope that when the world comes to an end, I can breathe a sigh of relief, because there will be so much to look forward to.
Unfaithful
Paul [reading from a Braille book]: My mother makes me chicken. Her chicken makes me cough. I wish that when she made it, she (at least) took the feathers off.
The Crow
Eric Draven: Little things used to mean so much to Shelly; I used to think they were kind of trivial. Believe me, nothing is trivial.
Eric Draven: It can't rain all the time.
Rocky IV
Adrian: Why can't you change your thinking? Everybody else does.
Rocky: 'Cause I'm a fighter. That's the way I'm made, Adrian. That's what you married. We can't change what we are. You can't change anything, Adrian. All we can do is just go with what we are.
Adrian: It's suicide. You've seen him, you know how strong he is. You can't win!
Rocky: Oh, Adrian. Adrian always tells the truth. No, maybe I can't win. Maybe the only thing I can do is just take everything he's got. But to beat me, he's going to have to kill me. And to kill me, he's gonna have to have the heart to stand in front of me. And to do that, he's got to be willing to die, himself. I don't know if he's ready to do that. I don't know.
Cape Fear
Dani: My reminiscence: I always thought that for such a lovely river, the name was mystifying; Cape Fear. When the only thing to fear on those enchanted summer nights was that the magic would end and real life would come crashing in.
Max Cady: I am like God, and God like me. I am as large as God, He is as small as I. He cannot above me, nor I beneath Him be. Selatius, 17th Century.
Zoolander
Hansel: Me and my friends have been too busy bathing off the southern coast of St. Bart's with spider monkeys. Trippin' on acid changed our whole perspective on shit.
Showdown in Little Tokyo
Johnny: Just in case we get killed, I wanted to tell you: You have the biggest dick I've ever seen on a man.
Sgt. Kenner: Thanks. I don't know what to say.
Johnny: How about, "don't get killed?"
Sgt. Kenner: Don't get killed.
Johnny: You, too.
Clay Pigeons
Lester: Her? Her? Her? I'm not even sure that damn thing's a woman.
Clay: of course it's a woman, it's got long hair!
Lester: it could be a rock star.
On The Waterfront
Terry: It wasn't him, Charlie, it was you. Remember that night at the Garden you came down to my dressing room and said, "Kid, this ain't your night. We're going for the price on Wilson." You remember that? "This ain't your night." MY NIGHT! I could've taken Wilson apart. So what happens? He gets the title shot outdoors in the Ballpark and what do I get? A one-way ticket to Palookaville. You was my brother, Charlie, you should've looked out for me just a little bit. You should've taken care of me just a little bit so I wouldn't have to take them dives for the short-end money.
Charlie: Oh, I had some bets down for you. You saw some money.
Terry: You don't understand. I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am. Let's face it, it was you, Charlie.